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Welcome to the Salty Spittoon, how tough are ya?

Last posted Mar 04, 2013 at 11:26PM EST. Added Feb 20, 2013 at 12:11AM EST
84 posts from 49 users

How tough am I, how tough am I? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Your fucking dead, man.

Last edited Feb 20, 2013 at 01:47AM EST

Cronus wrote:

How tough am I, how tough am I? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Your fucking dead, man.

Im 17 and im just now hitting puberty, you want to say that in 3 years when im big enough to beat you up?

Lich wrote:

I stepped on a lego and only cried for thirty minutes.

I once stepped over a whole floor coated in Legos, and I didn't feel any pain at all.

SubjectNumber32 wrote:

I once stepped over a whole floor coated in Legos, and I didn't feel any pain at all.

If you stepped on a lego and DIDN'T feel pain, then you must be paraplegic or you wore shoes.

How tough am I? HOW THOUGH AM I? I have personally killed 6,578 men in cold blood while looking them in the eye; jumped on 1,336 live grenades; and stuffed fourteen feet of my own intestine back into my stomach. If that doesn't scare you out of your frilly pink leotards, guess what: You are an idiot and you hate America.

MasterBurner "Capo" wrote:

I looked through the "Ruined Childhood" gallery
AND NONE OF IT RUINED MY CHILDHOOD

Hah.

My childhood was already a smoldering pile of slag. Try again.

Cronus wrote:

How tough am I, how tough am I? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Your fucking dead, man.

I don’t give a fuck who you are or where you live. You can count on me to be there to bring your fucking life to a hellish end. I’ll put you in so much fucking pain that it’ll make Jesus being nailed to a cross in the desert look like a fucking back massage on a tropical island. I don’t give a fuck how many reps you have or how tough you are IRL, how well you can fight, or how many fucking guns you own to protect yourself. I’ll fucking show up at your house when you aren’t home. I’ll turn all the lights on in your house, leave all the water running, open your fridge door and not close it, and turn your gas stove burners on and let them waste gas. You’re going to start stressing the fuck out, your blood pressure will triple, and you’ll have a fucking heart attack. You’ll go to the hospital for a heart operation, and the last thing you’ll see when you’re being put under in the operating room is me hovering above you, dressed like a doctor. When you wake up after being operated on, wondering what ticking time bomb is in your chest waiting to go off. You’ll recover fully from your heart surgery. And when you walk out the front door of the hospital to go home I’ll run you over with my fucking car out of no where and kill you. I just want you to know how easily I could fucking destroy your pathetic excuse of a life, but how I’d rather go to a great fuckng length to make sure your last remaining days are spent in a living, breathing fucking hell. It’s too late to save yourself, but don’t bother committing suicide either… I’ll fucking resuscitate you and kill you again myself you bitch-faced phaggot. Welcome to hell, population: you

Lich wrote:

If you stepped on a lego and DIDN'T feel pain, then you must be paraplegic or you wore shoes.

I was barefooted, and my feet were perfectly normal.

Last edited Feb 20, 2013 at 05:05PM EST

jace is a boss wrote:

i'm so tough i trolled an furry thread

I'm so tough I gave you an +1 when others downvoted you and I'm the furry ponyfucker that started the furry thread.


I'm so tough I beat Halo 4's campaign in one sitting while waiting for a bidding war over a limited edition copy of the first Star Wars movie. Now I'm gonna make a rage comic about it for Reddit and maybe upload it to my Team Fortress 2 ask blog; I might make a few green text stories as well. Also, I'm in the process of finding the last copy of that Mermaid Man comic, which will give me my fourth complete set.

Last edited Feb 20, 2013 at 09:42PM EST

jace is a boss wrote:

I so tough i caused more crap to happen

Wow bro that’s deep.
Im gonna be honest with you right now, that was just uncalled for…Ive seen some bad things in my time, I mean like shit that you have never even thought about before…but this..this is just fucked up I was just at the post office delivering mail when I read your post, I dropped my iphone in shock.
People started to look at me like I was about to pass out or something, I gave them an unnecessary smirk to re assure myself of this disbelief. I leaned over and picked up my phone, right about now my face was red as hell. I double checked your post just to see if I was mistaken for such filth. I was wrong, the devil has spoken, if this goes public your fked man, Im sorry but really, that post was just not needed.i walked out, sweat dripping from my face like id just ran a fucking marathon. I got home and my parents looked at me with a blank stare. I haven’t moved from my computer for over a week, I deleted my avi and have been trying to cut down on miscing. I expect a PM from your soon, or at least a formal apology, ive now been seeing a psychiatrist because everytime I log on to these fucking forums I start to get shaky. Seriously bro, fuck that, please read before you post otherwise your going to have a hard life ahead of you

"Rustle your opponents jimmies from afar." – Sun Tzu, The Art of War

Skeletor-sm

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