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Last posted Apr 22, 2013 at 08:15AM EDT. Added Apr 02, 2013 at 08:04PM EDT
80 posts from 26 users

Your name is Cale and you are a RIGHTEOUS BROTATO CHIP. You are in your room hanging out and doing nothing. You like Vidya, complaining, Cats, Military Science, wizards, may-mays, and the Internet. Oh shit it’s also your birthday and you are expecting a Beta from the hot new game that /v/ will hate everyone is tripping shit about.

Shit this is boring do something already.

RocketPropelledPanda wrote:

>inspect room

You appear to be in a room. Your room to be exact. The walls are beige, the floor made of grape juice, and every material object you own hidden in your mattress or Night stand which is on the other side of the room fuck you need to move that someday.

Teh Brawler wrote:

>complain about the game on /v/ to get attention

While you are loathe to partake in the 4Chans, you have nothing better to do, so you post a thread explaining everything, taking particular note to name yourself so that others can recognize you, as your sure they will love what you have to say.

Someone has checked their mail before you and acquired the Beta from his dad who works at Nintendo. You think this is total horseshit and silently fume for a moment.

Blue Screen (of Death) wrote:

Someone has checked their mail before you and acquired the Beta from his dad who works at Nintendo. You think this is total horseshit and silently fume for a moment.

>Doxx this someone and uncover his identity

You don’t know how to do that so you go ahead and do the whole Bro Chat thing.

[22:32] == Cale__ [6214aceb@gateway/web/freenode/ip.] has joined IRC

[22:11] Cale: I need a bro
[22:11] Cale: Taryn are we friends
[22:11] Cale: Converse with me
[22:12] Taryn: maybe
[22:12] Cale: what maybe
[22:12] Cale: since when is there a maybe
[22:16] Cale: Taryn you are breaking my heart here
[22:24] Taryn: What
[22:25] Cale: What do you mean what
[22:25] Taryn: Brb
[22:25] Cale: :V

>Retrieve Arms.
Cast Fireball at your bed.

You found your arms. Both of them. Usually one evades you depending on the frame because reasons.

>converse with a different bro
>Get into the persterchum coughcough I mean, IRC/MSN/Skype/Gtalk/FBchat and talk to your current friend who’s having a bday.

You have no one to blame but yourself.

professorcheese wrote:

>Examine contents of drawers.

Okay, your bed and computer are burning, so let’s see what’s in that drawer over there yeah.

What could it possibly be?

Deudly firearms

>captchalogue gun

You go ahead and slip it into your Cale Deck, which isn’t actually a deck at all, and is something of an invisible hyperspace satchel. It gets hard to remember if you have stuff. You can’t use it anyway since you have no .45 Magnum ammunition.

>log on KYM and start a new thread

It might also be worth noting that your Spel Book in your Cale Deck does not contain anything that could remedy this situation (probably) and it might be best to go get help. Or not.

>Call your best friend Taryn through different means than an online chatroom and ask for advice, his knowledge in the situation at hand will certainly safe the day.

RocketPropelledPanda wrote:

>Put out fire by smothering it with your body


CAleQUEST solVed!!!!!! ur BIG HERO NOW??

This is an awful idea. Really bad and you are angry that you thought of it.


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