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Anon learns about Dogs | /r/4chan

$AT&T LTE 21:09 9 56% Board ( /pol/ - Politically Incorrect Settings Mobile Home Are dogs literally the best investment? >programmed at the genetic level to love and serve you unconditionally >gets you out of the house, forces you to get exercise and socialize >built-in security system, scares off 196 KB JPG intruders and will protect you with their life in a confrontation >just having a dog exist in the same space as you is proven to decrease cortisol levels and reduce your heart disease risk >dogs are the perfect wingmen, helping you get numbers and slay p---- >or you can just f--- your dog (or take the knotpill and let them f--- you), it's no-strings-attached sex whenever you want it and no risk of pregnancy or STDS >training a dog teaches both of you the value of discipline, habit and perseverance >food, vet and supply costs force you to learn financial literacy and develop a budget >if you still f--- up financially you can always eat its meat to cut your losses >similar emotional reward to raising children, but at a fraction of the cost and effort, plus no risk of estrangement later in life >when they die, you can grieve appropriately for a few days and then go out and buy a replacement so the ride never ends Trying to think of negatives and can't think of any. I would argue at this performance/price ratio that adopting a dog is a better investment than even a 500 ounce stack of silver. Am I wrong? 14 Replies / 3 Images View Thread$