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So nice

66 hnggggproblems you're so considerate!" Haha thanks, I was raised in constant fear of upsetting people so yknow * fingerguns * nitrostreak Today someone told me I'm nice and I literally said "thanks it's the emotional trauma" 41,368 notes D

66 hnggggproblems you're so considerate!" Haha thanks, I was raised in constant fear of upsetting people so yknow * fingerguns * nitrostreak Today someone told me I'm nice and I literally said "thanks it's the emotional trauma" 41,368 notes D

/r/meirl me irl me in real life relatable memes relatable memes

Be Prepared For Anderson Cooper

mdtwn happy election eve!! make sure u leave milk and cookies out for anderson cooper tonight or he'll stand outside ur window and squint spacecrygirl 40,073 notes > D♡

mdtwn happy election eve!! make sure u leave milk and cookies out for anderson cooper tonight or he'll stand outside ur window and squint spacecrygirl 40,073 notes > D♡

anderson cooper

Escaping God

eesirachs Follow Dec 12, 2022 Anonymous asked: Can we escape god? eesirachs answered: no but he doesn't mind if you wriggle a little 5,272 notes D 3

eesirachs Follow Dec 12, 2022 Anonymous asked: Can we escape god? eesirachs answered: no but he doesn't mind if you wriggle a little 5,272 notes D 3

I'm Soaking

orcboxer Follow Jul 27 "Oh, no thank you. I don't drink," I tell my new friends at the party, no matter what beverage they offer me. Minutes later I'm seen standing in the swimming pool out back, with a serene look on my face. The water level is slowly, almost imperceptibly decreasing. 8 711 notes

orcboxer Follow Jul 27 "Oh, no thank you. I don't drink," I tell my new friends at the party, no matter what beverage they offer me. Minutes later I'm seen standing in the swimming pool out back, with a serene look on my face. The water level is slowly, almost imperceptibly decreasing. 8 711 notes

Artichokes

anonymous asked: how can you eat the fried hearts of something that once was alive and had a beating heart? do you feel any guilt? i hope you do. folk-punk Follow Jan 16, 2015 please google what an artichoke is 257.4K notes ง

anonymous asked: how can you eat the fried hearts of something that once was alive and had a beating heart? do you feel any guilt? i hope you do. folk-punk Follow Jan 16, 2015 please google what an artichoke is 257.4K notes ง

I Was Once Very Small

crabanarchy Follow i was actually born 9 months premature. they had to give me to a dust mite as a wet nurse. 17,113 notes

crabanarchy Follow i was actually born 9 months premature. they had to give me to a dust mite as a wet nurse. 17,113 notes

small dust mite

Rules for Halloween

Text is from <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/existennialmemes/765528064197345280/halloween-reminders">existennialmemes</a> on Tumblr

Text is from <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/existennialmemes/765528064197345280/halloween-reminders">existennialmemes</a> on Tumblr

Body Craves Water

sandersstudies That feeling when your body is requesting something but you're not sure what so you just start eating and drinking random stuff to try and figure it out sandersstudies Me, eating a chocolate waffle at 7pm: Is this what you desire, oh prison of flesh? queerglassescutie @Dope-A-Meme Meanwhile your body is like I need water

sandersstudies That feeling when your body is requesting something but you're not sure what so you just start eating and drinking random stuff to try and figure it out sandersstudies Me, eating a chocolate waffle at 7pm: Is this what you desire, oh prison of flesh? queerglassescutie @Dope-A-Meme Meanwhile your body is like I need water

The Amulet, And You

frightstricken Follow Aug 13 But are you normal about your friend who wears the corrupted amulet? frightstricken Aug 13 Do you allow your friend to spill blood as the amulet demands? Do you accept the amulet as a sapient force whose needs are important and must be met without question? Do you give the amulet a little kissy when it gets lonely 21 965 notes

frightstricken Follow Aug 13 But are you normal about your friend who wears the corrupted amulet? frightstricken Aug 13 Do you allow your friend to spill blood as the amulet demands? Do you accept the amulet as a sapient force whose needs are important and must be met without question? Do you give the amulet a little kissy when it gets lonely 21 965 notes

Furry Inflation

trinketbug Follow May 19 WHY IS A BIG MAC $11.99??? PASE ORDE HERE "furry inflation" (2024) 25.1K notes

trinketbug Follow May 19 WHY IS A BIG MAC $11.99??? PASE ORDE HERE "furry inflation" (2024) 25.1K notes

furry inflation

My Posting Harem

zeitghost Follow 4d ago me: "smoking that twisted vizier pack had me plotting and scheming." is that good? attractive woman with a three piece suit and half glasses, petting my hair and cooing affectionately: really good babe other attractive woman wearing full chainmail armor and a blazoned surcoat, leaning her head on my shoulder: you're so good at posting babe me: thanks ladies [i continue to smash my hands weakly against an inert stone slab]

zeitghost Follow 4d ago me: "smoking that twisted vizier pack had me plotting and scheming." is that good? attractive woman with a three piece suit and half glasses, petting my hair and cooing affectionately: really good babe other attractive woman wearing full chainmail armor and a blazoned surcoat, leaning her head on my shoulder: you're so good at posting babe me: thanks ladies [i continue to smash my hands weakly against an inert stone slab]

Words And Their Meanings

cumvvelt Follow "Guy" and "man" have different connotations with adjectival nouns. Like "tree guy" = arborist but "tree man" = he lives in a tree, or maybe he is a tree. thedupshadove Follow "I know a guy" = "I have a useful contact." "I know a man" = "I am about to tell you a story."

cumvvelt Follow "Guy" and "man" have different connotations with adjectival nouns. Like "tree guy" = arborist but "tree man" = he lives in a tree, or maybe he is a tree. thedupshadove Follow "I know a guy" = "I have a useful contact." "I know a man" = "I am about to tell you a story."

New Jersey

thescaryjokes Follow when i was a kid i found an anti-new jersey fb group & as someone from new jersey i took it really personally for some reason, so I'd go on there and on an almost daily basis I'd make posts like "wont you visit our beautiful coastline? :)" and all the comments were like "i hope you get run over by a car" and it would give me insane anxiety but i kept doing it #modern flagellation technique

thescaryjokes Follow when i was a kid i found an anti-new jersey fb group & as someone from new jersey i took it really personally for some reason, so I'd go on there and on an almost daily basis I'd make posts like "wont you visit our beautiful coastline? :)" and all the comments were like "i hope you get run over by a car" and it would give me insane anxiety but i kept doing it #modern flagellation technique

Death By Pun

luckychatons ☑ 601 Follow Jun 1 me as an assassin: *whispers* knife to meet you luckychatons Jun 1 601 what a stabulous evening luckychatons 601 Jun 1 "how many people have you killed" sword of a lot luckychatons 601 Jun 1 *bad thing happens* Me: hakuna katana luckychatons Jun 1 601 *gets badly wounded, was bleeding out* Me: haha yeah I guess you could say I almost blade to death luckychatons 601 Jun 1 me, pointing to the girl they're looking for: sheath over there

luckychatons ☑ 601 Follow Jun 1 me as an assassin: *whispers* knife to meet you luckychatons Jun 1 601 what a stabulous evening luckychatons 601 Jun 1 "how many people have you killed" sword of a lot luckychatons 601 Jun 1 *bad thing happens* Me: hakuna katana luckychatons Jun 1 601 *gets badly wounded, was bleeding out* Me: haha yeah I guess you could say I almost blade to death luckychatons 601 Jun 1 me, pointing to the girl they're looking for: sheath over there

Spooky Outoors

bgm05 Follow Sep 13, 2023 Went outside and saw a bat flying around. Then i saw a toad in the yard. Straight up like a witch's brew out there. Stay safe 41 800 notes

bgm05 Follow Sep 13, 2023 Went outside and saw a bat flying around. Then i saw a toad in the yard. Straight up like a witch's brew out there. Stay safe 41 800 notes

witches halloween

Boopermore

felagund-fiollaigean M Apr 1 601 800 Follow while i slouched, nearly stooping, suddenly there came a booping, as of someone gently booping, booping at my chamber door. tis some mutual, i said, booping at my chamber door. only this and nothing more. 7,998 notes

felagund-fiollaigean M Apr 1 601 800 Follow while i slouched, nearly stooping, suddenly there came a booping, as of someone gently booping, booping at my chamber door. tis some mutual, i said, booping at my chamber door. only this and nothing more. 7,998 notes