New York Magazine's 'Cruel Kids' Table' Cover Is Catching Flack From Republicans Who Can't Decide If It's A Hit Piece Or Not
Reese Youngn's 'No More Parties' Remix Is Back In Memes Following The Spread Of 'Dih,' 'TS' And 'PMO'
2013 'Modern Family' Scene Has TikTokers Saying 'I Hate Vietnam' In New Lip Dub Trend
'Warhammer 40K' Fans Are Hyped For The Much Awaited Sequel To The 2018 Fan Film 'Astartes'
Villains Take Their Names In Viral 'I Think I Like That Name' Meme On Twitter

File 1281729005 ipg-(12 KB, 242x238, 1281622206139s.jpg) □ Anonymous 08/13/10(Fri)15:50 No.701 78XXX >At a track meet >Chilling out on bleachers, waiting for my race >Cute girls in skimpy track uniforms EVERYWHERE. >A group of them are on the field stretching CAMELTOE SPOTTED >Begin thinking naughty thoughts Massive boner is hidden by roomy track pants "HEY ANON WE CANT FIND JOE YOU HAVE TO TAKE HIS SPOT." >Slip Mr. Johnson into my waistband as I stand up >Solid Snake my way >Take pants off, am now only wearing bright yellow short-shorts >Walk quickly to my blocks >Bend over to hide the massive bulge >THE MOMENT OF TRUTH IS AT HAND across the field >Race starts >Boner immediately frees itself >Begins bouncing and waving dramatically >A loud slap can be heard each time it hits my thigh >THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE >It begins spinning as we round the corner >D---: "DONT WORRY BUDDY, IVE GOT YOUR BACK." HELICOPTER MODE: ENGAGED >D--- propels me into first H-------- I FEEL LIKE A SUPERHERO >Beat the black kids >Receive prophetic vision of one day creating a helicopter made of d---- >Still have to walk all the way back across the field to the starting line to retrieve my pants >Let my boner shamelessly protrude AND NOT A SINGLE F--- WAS GIVEN

Share Pin Download More

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: png

Resolution: (706px x 524px)

File size: 181 KB

Trump says he ordered air strikes on Islamic State group in Somalia 301 301 SAFE US AFRICA COMMAND US Defence Secretary Pete Hegseth said the strikes "further degrade" the ability of IS in Somalia George Wright BBC News 1 February 2025, 17:42 GMT Updated 35 minutes ago Donald Trump says he ordered military air strikes on a senior attack planner and others from the Islamic State (IS) group in Somalia. "These killers, who we found hiding in caves, threatened the United States and our Allies," Trump posted on social media. 1aa90f.png 611 KB PNG >US airliners falling out of the skies >Egg prices soaring >Deportation photo op failed >Melania getting Trudeau'd >Trump looking to deflect attention OFFIC

Anonymous (ID: y8De0+0A 02/03/18 (Sat)20:54:28 No.7275061 >dad buys 2015 Diesel Dodge Ram >6 months later says "I think I'm gonna buy a new truck" >whatthefuck.jpeg 128 KB JPG >"why you just got a new one" >"I'm gonna buy a 2016. Those diesel Engines last forever" >"then why don't you make your 2015 last forever" >says I don't understand vehicles >tfw he's over $70,000 in debt and doesn't understand why Is my dad retarded?

Anonymous 1/31/2025, 10:39:47 AM No.49078630 r/greentext in 2036 Discussion 7 KB JPEG >be me > logging into Reddit Metaverse Premium Plus (now with haptic feedback for downvotes) >spend 3 hours verifying my age through blockchain-based ID system > finally get to r/greentext >sort by new >"Anon works at the Mars Colony" >be me, wagecuck on Mars Colony 47-B >working 169 hour weeks maintaining Musk's catgirl breeding facility >getting paid in ElonCoin (currently worth 0.0000001 USD) >mfw when I can't even afford soylent anymore >tfw no qt 3.14 genetically engineered catgirl gf >at least I'm not working in the reddit karma mines >get notification that I forgot to thank the Amazon-Tesla Al for allowing me to breathe their premium oxygen subscription > oxygen supply cut off >die >get reanimated as a cybernetic wagie because I signed the wrong clause in my 47,000 page employment contract > now I have to work double shifts >tfw when you realize you'll never escape wage slavery even in death >mfw when I realize I'm still paying off my student loans from 2024 >pic related, it's my government assigned cybernetic suffering enhancement module Replies: >Fake: Anon implies he got a job >Gay: Anon works for another man's catgirl facility >TendieBot_9000: [ATTENTION CITIZEN] Please validate your greentext reading license before attempting humor >"what the f--- is a soylent?" > "it's what they called food before the great nutrient paste standardization act of 2034" >be me reading this on my neuralink >get error 404: brain not found >mfw As I watch the last remnants of 4chan culture get absorbed into the corporate metaverse, I realize the true greentext was the autism we developed along the way.

View All 44,692 Images

Load 2 Comments

More:

+66

Greentext Stories - Image #187,910

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

File 1281729005 ipg-(12 KB, 242x238, 1281622206139s.jpg) □ Anonymous 08/13/10(Fri)15:50 No.701 78XXX >At a track meet >Chilling out on bleachers, waiting for my race >Cute girls in skimpy track uniforms EVERYWHERE. >A group of them are on the field stretching CAMELTOE SPOTTED >Begin thinking naughty thoughts Massive boner is hidden by roomy track pants "HEY ANON WE CANT FIND JOE YOU HAVE TO TAKE HIS SPOT." >Slip Mr. Johnson into my waistband as I stand up >Solid Snake my way >Take pants off, am now only wearing bright yellow short-shorts >Walk quickly to my blocks >Bend over to hide the massive bulge >THE MOMENT OF TRUTH IS AT HAND across the field >Race starts >Boner immediately frees itself >Begins bouncing and waving dramatically >A loud slap can be heard each time it hits my thigh >THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE >It begins spinning as we round the corner >D---: "DONT WORRY BUDDY, IVE GOT YOUR BACK." HELICOPTER MODE: ENGAGED >D--- propels me into first H-------- I FEEL LIKE A SUPERHERO >Beat the black kids >Receive prophetic vision of one day creating a helicopter made of d---- >Still have to walk all the way back across the field to the starting line to retrieve my pants >Let my boner shamelessly protrude AND NOT A SINGLE F--- WAS GIVEN

View Gallery Random Image

+ Add a Comment

Comments (2)

Display Comments