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Greentext Stories - Anon's bamboozling tendies experience | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 03/13/21(Sat)11:40:37 No.62729154 >be at the store >see some vegetarian tendies on sale >meh might as well try them heard they taste the same >go home and open the package >suddenly the window breaks as a m----- rolls in >its Joe f------ Rogan >"no vegan b------- eat wild game like a man" >he takes out a bow and shoots my cat >jumps me the moment i start to hesitate >jiujitsu grapples me and almost chokes me to death >i instinctively grasp for air >notice a bong in my mouth >"dimethyltryptamine will help you see the light" >get blasted into a dimension more real than this one >filled with Joe Rogans preaching and doing standup >the propaganda nightmare lasts for multiple lifetimes >wake up shivering and broken >cry and whisper to myself "we are all apes" >Joe Rogan nods >"nothing more productive than some long form conversation" >takes my dead cat and leaves This always happens after I started using Spotify

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