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Anonymous | 49048915 Acum 2 h •.• >be me >uni student living in ghetto ass apartment >playing Dark Souls on Xbox >my w---- neighbour wanders into my room >she sits on my bed bitch no that's where my dragon plushie goes >"hey anon, whatcha doing?" >0-0-oh hi femanon, i'm playing Dark Souls >"oh ok. that looks really cool. can i play with you?" >n-n-no, i play offline >"oh i see. would you..." spreads legs >"like to do something else that involves 2 people?" 30,6 kB JPG >no >I have to beat Gwyn and link the fire >she leaves >virginity protected how did i do robots? REPLY

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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anon with tomboy friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/07/22(Fri)07:27:44 No.232655305 Smile There waert the te the tomboy.jpg 218 KB JPG >Have best friend that's a tomboy >Boyish hobbies, short hair, wild, temper, she's a walking stereotype >Got along with me well because I've always been very chill and didn't respond to conflict, so I could play off her outbursts and not get offended >Back in high school she approached me with an offer >Since we were both bad at dating, suggested we could be friends with benefits, to feel less lonely >Our first time was when my mom left to go buy groceries while she and I were playing Magic. It was short, awkward, and I bent a few of her cards in the scramble, but it was damn good >As the years went by we kept the routine, being buddies that would f--- when the opportunity arose >We both tried dating other people, but it would fall apart quickly and we'd go back to our comfort zone >Cut to 10 years later, i.e. last week, I'm over at her place watching Book of Boba Fett, and she gets this look on her face. >"Anon.. should we get married?" >Retard noises fall out of my bewildered mouth, and I say that although I'm not saying NO what the f--- brought this up >Says that she figured as she got older and got more confident she'd figure out how to shift into dating, but it never really happened. >Still as awkward and dorky as she always felt, and never got comfortable being intimate with other people. >But with me, she always feels safe, and doesn't mind opening up, being vulnerable. >"I mean, I'm basically in love with you." What should I do here, /a/? I definitely care about her a lot, and I don't thin life with her in some capacity, but I'm not sure l've ever really felt "love" before. I don't get those butterflies and crazy palpitations other people talk about. I'm just comfortable with her. Am I gonna f--- this up trying to turn our relationship into a more "normal" one? mind spending my >>232655361 # >>232655672 # >>232656351 # >2232657376 # 2>232657402 # >>232658156 # >>232658751 # 22232659225 # >>232659693 # >232659776 # >>232661299 # >>232663134 # 2>232665204 # >>232665500 # >>232666179 # >>232666203 # >>232666233 # >>232666866 # >>232667352 # >>232668028 # >>232668202 # 2>232668504 # >>232669080 # >>232669831 # >>232670337 # >>232670748 # >>232670980 # >>232672425 # >>232673139 # >>232673680 # >>232674316 #

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The sad part is Jamaica didn't explain | /r/Greentext

What's the deal with Jamaica >whole country is recognized for it's Rastafarians and use of marijuana >Marijuana is illegal there Jamaica please explain

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Anon goes to Mexico | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2(Fri)15:32:07 No.870189077 > Be me >average looking white guy >solid 7, not fat >be on tinder >have to compete with 11/10 chads >get like 2 matches a month >lonely af 111 KB JPG >family invites me on trip to Mexico >go with cause I need a vacation >be at Mexico >still on tinder >get 12 matches the first day >all 10/10 >w--.png >most of them messaged first >"hey, you're really hot" (but in Spanish) >use translator to communicate >one invites me to meet >prolly gonna get stabbed and robbed >power of horny makes me go >get there and she's really there >use translator for pretty much everything >we get street food together >ask me "do you wanna hang out again tomorrow" >try to respond in broken Spanish >she laughs and thinks it's cute I'm learning >kisses me on the cheek before parting ways >next day, 4 more texts saying "let's meet" from different girls >meet with same girl as night before >go to bar with her sister and sisters boyfriend. Boyfriend is 4/10 chub while sister is 10/10 bomb >boyfriend is more beta cuck than anyone >compared to him I'm 10/10 alpha Chad >ask sister about him >apparently he was popular in school and they dated since then >bruh w--? anons, literally just go to mexico. Idc how ugly you are, you're a f------ Chad in Mexico.

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Anon pays his phone bill | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 714912237 >be me >6'2" white dude >phone bill is due >use Cricket >used a fake name for the account because they don't check ID >don't remember what it is >go to Cricket store >black dude working >give him my number >he looks up my name with my phone number >"Tyrone Watermelon" >ohfuck.jpg >he looks shocked >looks up at me >"your name is Tyrone Watermelon?" >straight face >"Yes." >"really?" >"Yeah." %3D >pay my bill >all he can say is "...have a nice day" >leave >mfw

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Anon discovers modern schooling | /r/Greentext

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Anon gets a coat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 64Alc1j5 11/28/17(Tue)18:10:31 No.3117772 >be me >at an extremely expensive fur coat store in NYC >wife wants to buy a fur coat >drainingmyfuckingbankaccount.png >look outside to front of store and see a 55 KB JPG guy with a bucket of fake blood waiting to throw it on someone wearing a fur coat because he doesnt like animal abuse >looks like a real f------ skinny libtard virgin, just looking at him pisses me off >employees tell me he sits out there every day and terrorizes customers >get a brilliant f------ idea >find the most expensive coat in the entire store >coat i find is thousands upon thousands of dollars >tell wife to try it on "you look great honey, but maybe we should see how it looks in the day light?" >tell employees to come with us outside to see what it look like (and to reassure them we arent stealing it) >wife puts on coat, and we walk outside >store owner is looking at us from the inside of store >libtard virgin with bucket of fake blood proceeds to drench wife in the blood >coat is absolutely ruined >i tackle him to ground >store owner and a security guard walk outside and bring him into store >they call the cops >he has to pay the store back for the coat >mfw i probably just made this guy homeless

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Anon is Edgar Allan Poe | /r/Greentext

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anon is musican | /r/Greentext

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gamers in a nutshell? not mine but thought it belongs here | /r/Greentext

1607397557617.png 58 KB PNG >win game >feel nothing >lose game >day ruined

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Anon discovers masturbation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/01/18(Tue)01:46:12 No.767319186 Aight f--- i got one for you >be me, 5 >in bed with my dad cause renovating >ask dad what he dreams about Erection in progress >"hot girls, anon" >suddenly get erection for some reason >dont know what an erection is 15 KB JPG >go to bathroom to pee >rub my d--- by accident >feelsgoodman.jpg >fast forward 2 days >watching fashiontv for some reason >get erect >everyone around me >pulls out d--- and start rubbing it >orgasm >no c-- cause 5 >mom notices and screams "ANON WHAT ARE YOU DOING" >gets beaten >fast forward a few years >discovers what m----------- and erection are >mfw i remember jerking off in front of parents So hows it going /b/

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I fucking hate zoomers | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/11/21(Tue)17:15:05 No.854186812 Zoomers >lets goooo >finna >no cap >vibing 103 KB JPG >rn >fr >ion 42 Replies / 9 Images View Thread

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can anon do it. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)23:27:32 No.870035903 Let's turn "NFT" into a racial slur against black people, I think we should do this for the following reasons: -"NFT" starts with the letter N -NFTS are commonly associated with monkeys (most NFT memes involve a monkey of some kind and a lot of NFTS 20 KB JPG are just monkey drawings) -Black people used to be traded as property FINALLY AND MOST IMPORTANTLY: It would make all the people trying to get rich off of this s--- (especially celebs and influencers) really really f------ mad Let's do it bros 2 Replies View Thread

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Greentext Stories - Anon Virginity protected | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Anonymous | 49048915 Acum 2 h •.• >be me >uni student living in ghetto ass apartment >playing Dark Souls on Xbox >my w---- neighbour wanders into my room >she sits on my bed bitch no that's where my dragon plushie goes >"hey anon, whatcha doing?" >0-0-oh hi femanon, i'm playing Dark Souls >"oh ok. that looks really cool. can i play with you?" >n-n-no, i play offline >"oh i see. would you..." spreads legs >"like to do something else that involves 2 people?" 30,6 kB JPG >no >I have to beat Gwyn and link the fire >she leaves >virginity protected how did i do robots? REPLY

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