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Anonymous I'm ready to do surgery 757 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)18:47:17 No.884001453 >be me, 24m, high school dropout >jobless, living with parents >walking home from grocery store and see an old woman fallen over, blood everywhere >hide behind a wall until somebody else sorts the situation out >people come and bandage her up and call her an ambulance >when clearly the situation has been handled and an audience, has gathered, I run over >"I'm a doctor, what seems to be the problem" >audience members gasp with delight >"thank god you're here" >act like I know my s--- until the ambulance arrives >help carry woman into ambulance and then say goodbye and wish her luck >go home >mfw the next day i'm on the front cover of the local newspaper >"Hero doctor saves injured elderly woman" I could actually be a doctor with no training the only things you have to do are say you're a doctor and prescribe people whatever tf they want

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Friendly Fire | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous RE SA SHOOT ME $12 15 KB JPG 08/16/22(Tue)09:24:45 No.69832483 >go to store >there's a screen hooked to a security camera >some dude is on a screen >"awfully brave of this guy to walk outside with that hairline and a posture like that" >wait a minute >it's me So yeah, I'm killing myself today View Thread

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anon gets the 4th wall ending | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 543509053 102,8 kB JPG 9 REPLIES 2 sa. önce >agree with the antagonist >die to him intentionally >uninstall game and tell everyone you finished it 6 İMAGES REPLY

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Anon tells the story of Aphrodite Kallipygos, the goddess with a beautiful butt

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anon tries to be nice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Dinosaurs 1.01 MB JPG 08/05/22(Fri)15:48:02 No.883319932 Happened earlier today >Be Me >Watching p--- >Get bored and decide to watch cam girls instead. >Have an account already with tokens and s---. >Click on hot girl with big t------ >After watching for a while I get an idea. >type in chat: "What's your favorite Dinosaur?" >Message pops up on her stream, and she thinks about it. >try's describing a stegosaurus before remembering what it's called. >she starts happily talking about how she used to go to the park with her dad as a kid, and pretend to search for dinosaur bones in the sand. >She looks sad after she finish the story. >She seems deep in thought. >She gets up and ends the stream. My autism wanted to know what dinosaurs online strippers liked, and instead I sent a cam-girl into depression over her poor current relationship with her father. 6 Replies / 4 Images View Thread

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Anon meets someone at the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous * 290 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)19:10:32 No.67991793 >be me >somewhat shy >walking to the squat rack >from the corner of my eye, see the most beautiful man I've ever seen walking in the same direction >can literally see his 10-pack through his shirt >actcool.gif >keep on walking >so does he >reach squat rack >he's looking right at me >somehow, my shyness just disappears and some primal instinct kicks in, so I make eye contact and keep looking into the darkest, soul-melting eyes I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on >adrenaline kicks in, and without thinking, I move closer to him >he moves closer as well >in the heat of the moment, without even saying anything, I slowly go in for a kiss >my heart skips as many beats as humanly possible as I realise he does the same >suddenly, *bump* >mfw my head almost shattered the mirror trying to kiss my reflection Appreciate yourself anons. You're already beautiful exactly the way you are.

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Anon makes a deal with the demons | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood 19 KB JPG >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?

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Anon doesn't like Ben | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous NOBODY CAME FOR ME 215 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)08:24:46 No.69829904 >came home late and drunk yesterday >walk past parents room >hear moaning >drunk af so I decide to listen very quick >hear dad role playing as the oldest son of our neighbors : Anonymous >mom keeps saying "f--- me Ben" obviously imagining my dad is him >go to my room >havent slept since and feel like doing pic related 08/16/22(Tue)10:11:33 No.69830568 Your parents are unironically bad people for having this sort of kink and especially indulging it.

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first comment best comment | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous V 61 KB JPG : Anonymous 14 KB JPG 08/15/22(Mon)15:07:11 No.67981881 >"Hey mind if I get a quick spot?" >"Uhh I don't think I can spot that much weight" H-have I made it? 08/15/22(Mon)15:08:34 No.67981901 >>67981881 (OP) # >OP doing bodyweight squats >>67982029 # >>67982042 # >>67982043 # >>67982047 # >>67982224 # >>67984006 # >>67984024 # >>67984151 # >>67984208 # >>67984453 # >>67984932 # >>67986199 # >>67986261 # >>67986444 # >>67987263 # >>67987861 # >>67987895 # >>67987969 # >>67988214 # >>67988223 # >>67988258 # >>67988519 # >>67988538 # >>67988573 #

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bigot bros rise up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 17hUHZIB >>391310714 # 08/16/22(Tue)06:52:06 No.391312913 >Whites: I don't care if you're gay, i just don't want the wine stuff being shoved down my childrens throats, that's all! >Leftist: RACIST BIGOT!! >Muslim: If you are gay, you deserve to be castrated and burned alive >Leftist: Diversity is our strength!!

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Anon gets topped | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 404 KB JPG 03/11/22(Fri) 10:17:58 No.24812242 grindr >Got extremely sick a few weeks later >HIV test just came back HIV positive I should kill myself huh? : Anonymous >MtF >Wanted to try the BBC meme so hooked up with some guy on 03/11/22 (Fri)10:18:24 No.24812251 03/11/22 (Fri)10:18:49 No.24812256 Anonymous Component Results HIV Ag/Ab combo Your Value Reactive Standard Range Non Reactive HIV-1 p24 Ag detected. By Chemiluminescent Microparticle Immunoassay General Information Ordered by MD Collected on 03/09/2022 2:53 PM (Blood) Resulted on 03/09/2022 8:24 PM Result Status: Final result 1625726061870.png 99 KB PNG >>24812242 (OP) # And I already know people will say I'm LARPing if I don't post the results, so here. Go ahead and laugh

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anon wants a brother or 2 | /r/Greentext

Ben NL brother i want to be in a brotherhood BR see fren 13:31 08/16/22(Tue)13:30:16 No.69831736 does anyone here also wish to be in a brotherhood. i have one brother that i really love but he moved out so i see him very rarely and i really want the feeling of having brothers you can trust and are a priority to you. i fantasize sometimes about being adopted by someone and telling me that he adopted 5 other people to form a brotherhood and then having 5-8 brothers that care about me. anyone else have this fantasy hug fren 7 KB JPG 14% View Thread

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Anon catches a Virus | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/08/20(Tue)02:43:04 No.535226782 1606304985763.gif 331 KB GIF >download video game for free >default search engine changes

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Greentext Stories - Anon is a doctor | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Anonymous I'm ready to do surgery 757 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)18:47:17 No.884001453 >be me, 24m, high school dropout >jobless, living with parents >walking home from grocery store and see an old woman fallen over, blood everywhere >hide behind a wall until somebody else sorts the situation out >people come and bandage her up and call her an ambulance >when clearly the situation has been handled and an audience, has gathered, I run over >"I'm a doctor, what seems to be the problem" >audience members gasp with delight >"thank god you're here" >act like I know my s--- until the ambulance arrives >help carry woman into ambulance and then say goodbye and wish her luck >go home >mfw the next day i'm on the front cover of the local newspaper >"Hero doctor saves injured elderly woman" I could actually be a doctor with no training the only things you have to do are say you're a doctor and prescribe people whatever tf they want

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