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12/07/22(Wed)10:46:08 No.71295682 >I refuse to ask out the girl myself, but that's not because im a pussyintel, its because all women want 0.000000001% turbo chad to ride a c--- carousel, so if i asked her out she would reject me because im 5.10 balding and autistic (self diagnosed), and even if she said yes, i would betabuxx while she thinks of chad, not because im chadsexual or insecure, but because women are just like that trust me i know first hand! All they want is chad and his juicy c---, they don't care about anything else! And if she wants me, shes gotta make the first move! And i want a real women not a w----! 4 Replies / 1 Image Anonymous 8 KB JPG View Thread Anonymous >>71295682 (OP) # *looks in the mirror* Yeah I'm not asking anyone out. 12/07/22(Wed)10:47:51 No.71295696

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Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

>she stops me, wants to roleplay >blindfolds me, we're playing doctor >kinky but okay >feel pressure around my ass >pull off blindfold 00 Anonymous (ID: zuq0 ITT: Weird sex experiences >be 22 >start dating blonde. 7/10 >shes quirky but fun > dat ass >second date >go to her place >shewantstheD.jpeg >go down on her >things are going well >crazy bitch is shoving 3-4 plastic horses into my a------ >she says my condition is "stable"

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Femanon wants to meet a man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 52 KB JPG 12/06/22(Tue)21:52:16 No.71292680 >33 year old fembot >met a guy and we hit it off but he ghosted me after some hot girl in WOW talked to him >feelslikeshit.jpg >looking for a tall white skelly bf who I can take care of :( that looks like picrel >I am a bit on the chubby side but I've been losing weight 20 pounds down so far! >have severe depression tried killing myself a few times >I do well for myself >live on my own >can cook and clean >have stable income honestly I wonder if life is even worth it anymore, I just want to end it all but f--- killing yourself is annoying and tough. >>71292703 # >>71292704 # >>71293539 # >>71293635 #

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Anon smokes a weed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Reefer madness 76 KB JPG 12/06/22 (Tue)22:51:33 No.890336172 >be dirty potdrugger >hear coughing gets you higher Idea.bongrip >get The Coof intentionally >cough 10x as hard >don't get any higher, permanently damaged taste F--- you Joe Biden

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Anon doesn’t understand run-offs and grammar | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: d5Pp5QGv) [+] 12/06/22(Tue)21:51:35 No.407376083 >>407373628 (OP) # >elections were weeks ago >still not f------ done counting votes The US are a f------ joke >>407376447 #

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Anon is concerned about the ramifications of his unlimited food cheat code | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/05/22(Mon)21:07:20 No.18662470 If I "dine and dash" but also leave a tip, does it go to the server or the restaurant? Hear me out. I live in SF, and shoplifting under $950 is legal (it's not even a misdemeanor, they literally don't prosecute). Dining and dashing is perfect, because it's just some food, you're not even taking physical goods, and nobody can prove you were even there anyway. The evidence is in your stomach. 68 KB JPG However, I don't care about the restaurant, but it kind of sucks to think that a minimum wage server wouldn't get their tip. If I were to leave a tip on the table but otherwise run out on my bill, would my server be able to keep the tip? Or would the restaurant take it and put it towards the food cost? (I'd assume they can't do that, but just checking.) 12/05/22(Mon)21:08:23 No.18662472 Anonymous >>18662470 (OP) # This is exactly the kind of s--- I'd expect from a californian

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anon mocks incels | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/06/22(Tue)07:16:41 No.71283320 >>71283386 >>71283500 >>71283551 >>71283842 >>71284069 >>71284239 >>71284290 >>71284325 >>71284390 >>71284462 >>71284858 >>71285463 >>71285849 >>71286235 >he's still waiting on the incel revolution where millions of men rise up to revoke women's rights and undo the sexual revolution because they can't get laid/find girlfriends/find wives >he doesn't realize all the men capable of committing organized acts of violence are doing perfectly fine in the dating market and only the losers are lonely >he doesn't realize the vast majority of lonely incels would rather just pay prostitutes and masturbate and cope with video games than risk their life in a civil war

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Anon is epic gamer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 272 KB JPG 12/06/22 (Tue)22:29:23 No.890329110 >be school night >playing ps4 with the loner kid from school >alright man I gotta go >awww dude >yea sorry man >cut out my mic >switch to appear offline mode >play doom eternal till sunrise >show up to school half awake Rip and tear until it's done

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Anon vs Duck | /r/Greentext

File: 858F0667-8276-48A2-B2E6-5(...).jpg (10 KB, 249x202) >it starts trying to bite my hand >I throw the duck Times where being /fit/ came in handy Anonymous 11/29 >>69106435 >>69106444 >be me this weekend >on my 3rd date with this girl >we are having a gainz friendly picnic at a duck pond >while we are eating some duck comes up to us >keeps trying to get into our food >it was funny at first but this duck had no fear >keep trying to shoo it away, doesn't even so much as flinch >pick up a stick and try poking it >it gets angry >suddenly tries to attack me >I pick it up >it flies in the direction I threw it but circles back and starts flying right towards me >I'm gonna end this once and for all >I stand my ground and get ready to punch the duck >its flying right right at me >I threw the cleanest punch I've ever connected in my life >hit the duck square in the chest >it makes the strangest noise I've ever heard >it was like sucker punching a human in the gut, but a high pitched quack comes out >quickly realize what I just did >I didn't go full force but still pretty hard, maybe 50% >the duck stumbles away desperately, I think I knocked the wind out of it >it rushes into the pond and swims off >girl is laughing hysterically at what she just witnessed >I punched a duck

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it's over for anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous It's truly over 30 KB JPG >lifelet >>71281173 # : Anonymous 28 KB PNG : Anonymous >>71281120 (OP) # It might truly be over for you anon >>71281217 # 12/06/22(Tue)12:18:28 No.71281120 >facelet >buttlet >body porportionlet >brainlet >hobbylet >interestlet >conversationlet >energylet 12/06/22(Tue)12:25:34 No.71281161 >>71281192 # >>71281193 # 12/06/22(Tue)12:27:06 No.71281173 >>71281161 # i know anon. ill never find a bf and i have zero future but at least i can dream about winning the lottery : Anonymous >>71281120 (OP) # >buttlet Lmao, imagine not clogging the toilet every time you s---, couldn't be me 12/06/22(Tue)12:27:29 No.71281177 12/06/22(Tue)12:30:23 No.71281192 : Anonymous >>71281177 # when i say buttlet i mean i have a hank hill ass

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Chad Olie refuses to elaborate | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 77 KB JPG 12/06/22(Tue) 16:53:09 No.890311288 >had a s--- date so go home to my dog Olie >me: hi little buddy you still don't have a mom sorry >Olie: woof >me: yeah I know but we have each other right? >Olie: woof >me: I really wish life didn't suck like this sometimes Olie. I hate my job. Dad hates me and wishes I was never born. I don't have anyone in my life. Things are just lonely. You're the only one keeping me together Olie. Seriously you're the best. We're going to be the bestest friends forever aren't we?! Hahaah >Olie: no I'm good >....... It's been two years since this happened. I keep trying to get him to talk again. I swear he spoke. Does he not trust me? Is he understanding me but refusing to answer? What the f--- Olie why won't he speak again. What do I do /b/

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Anon I CANT CHAAAANGGGEE | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/18/22(Fri)17:34:39 No.26090557 27zjrkzt85sz.png 1.02 MB PNG God gave me 10 commandments to follow and none of them say to not drink while driving, but the 8th and 10th commandment are to not to steal and not to covet someones possessions, so no you're not getting my license or drinks now f--- off the best part of Free Bird is starting

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boundaries, anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: trL/qvJ0) 11/23/22(Wed)04:02:05 No.52580563 1669179164681824.jpg 92 KB JPG >got written up for positioning my cursor too close to a female coworkers cursor during a live edit of our google sheets presentation

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Anon jerks off in school | /r/Greentext

File: 1616193274886.gif (1.34 MB, 568x396) Anonymous 12/06/22(Tue)20:39:43 No.890304687 >>890304777 >be me, engineering student >stuyidng for finals at library >feel super f------ horny >decide to wank it at the bathroom since i need to finish what i started working on >pull out phone and earphones and put the most hardocre a--- sex on cvids >wank.jpg >people keep coming in and out, don't care >c-- >lay back to relax, causing me to look up >see a hand holding a phone at the top of the bathroom stall is it time to kill myself? my face was full on display the moment i looked up. Im so f-----, who the f--- even records sor fat f--- wanking in a public library? weirdos

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Greentext Stories - Anon aint chasing whamen | /r/Greentext

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12/07/22(Wed)10:46:08 No.71295682 >I refuse to ask out the girl myself, but that's not because im a pussyintel, its because all women want 0.000000001% turbo chad to ride a c--- carousel, so if i asked her out she would reject me because im 5.10 balding and autistic (self diagnosed), and even if she said yes, i would betabuxx while she thinks of chad, not because im chadsexual or insecure, but because women are just like that trust me i know first hand! All they want is chad and his juicy c---, they don't care about anything else! And if she wants me, shes gotta make the first move! And i want a real women not a w----! 4 Replies / 1 Image Anonymous 8 KB JPG View Thread Anonymous >>71295682 (OP) # *looks in the mirror* Yeah I'm not asking anyone out. 12/07/22(Wed)10:47:51 No.71295696

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