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: Anonymous Job Greentexts 10/23/17(Mon)23:27:58 No.40623659 225 KB PNG This happened last night. >Get job at McDonalds, need cash >Work in the back arranging the meals >qt 3.14 comes in with-8 yo daughter, asks for a chicken nugget Happy Meal >daughter is really polite to casier, says please and everything >throw in an extra nugget because of her kindness >few mins later, manager tells me to mop a spill >its right next to the mom and her daughter >evesdrop on them >"Mommy look, the people in the back gave me an extra nugget, why?" >mom replies, "Its because they're dumb enough to work here that they cant count" >mfw >mom and daughter laugh while I walk away Why are people so unappreciative?

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Anonymous 139 KB JPG 12/19/24(Thu)15:28:13 No.928849473 >Be Rose >Throw away a priceless jewel worth hundreds of millions of dollars >Could have made her family financially secure for generations but says no for le epic symbolism >Reminisces about the man that saved her, but also hogs the floating door like a selfish pig, killing him. (Watch the Mythbusters episode) This is one of the greatest love stories ever told? Dude, Rose is a f------ bitch.

Anonymous (ID: 9Mc0Hnwf 12/19/24(Thu)15:49:03 No.491828169 1.94 MB JPG >sells your gold reserves >basically completely crashes your economy >Canadian dollar crashes >tells leafs to anhero with suicide pods if they get too sick >imports 6 gorillion pajeets to fight over a single Tim Horton's >gets offended when basically only neighbor that has been decent says they would be better off annexed Why leafs? Why?

: Anonymous 05/26/22(Thu)13:13:15 No.68790277 196 KB PNG >Go on omegle >say im interested in politics >match up >ask them about their political opinion >take the radical extreme opposite of the answer >get them riled up >write a question of catalogues >they type for over 2 minutes >disconnect before they can send me their shittext 4 victims today

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anon takes a trip down the memory lane | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/22(Sat)20:18:05 No.177737233 THIS EAM IS NOT YET RATED FOR FUTURO 00 TO FILMATINGS.COM WE WERE WARNED 2012 NOVEMBER FIND OUT THE TRUTH. SEARCH:2012 2012_2009_2669_poster.jpg 518 KB JPG >the Apocalypse was ten years ago COLUMBIA PICTURES MARAMIN

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Anon buys a dab pen | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 133 KB JPG 12/10/22(Sat) 18:25:39 No.71346758 >buy the pen from friend >get hooked after a week >get high so many times feels like Im breezing though time >take advantage of this and smoke before school >legit the second I got high, school was already over and I was at home >start doing this everyday and eventually start skipping my home life too >already skipped through most of my major life events >no recollection of anything >mfw magic pen lets me travel through time

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Anon plays Fallout: New Vegas | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 14 minutes ago 5 REPLIES 609553913 >be me >walking home >see a cactus with it's fruit fully grown >been playing a ton of new vegas and assume you can just pick it with your bare hands, but just grab it around the big visible spines >immediately get pricked >for the rest of the day constantly feel a tiny spine in my finger that i see >ffw years later see a video showing that prickly pears actually have microscopic spikes that get under your skin, and the only way to eat it is to burn them off fnv lied to me

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anon has schizophrenia | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Where are my friends ¿ 20 KB PNG 12/10/22(Sat) 22:22:29 No.890535551 >Be me >Born with schizophrenia >Rough childhood, as nobody wanted to be my friend ?>Get to high school, where I finally made some friends >They were awsome friends who helped me through some very tough times >Graduated from high school and got into college >My friendship with my high school friends is still going strong >Turn 18, finally able to get medication for my schizophrenia >Take my medicine for the first time >After all these years, I finally feel peace >Want to tell my friends the news that I can now control my schizophrenic episodes >I can not find then anywhere >mfw my friends are gone

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anon is a cyberpunk detective | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 73 KB JPG 11/07/22(Mon)20:47:21 No.70900605 what the f--- > be me > crime scene investor of the year 2096 > find some guy whos brain completely shutdown > check his brain activity history chip > see that 3 petabytes of goulash recipes directly download to his brain minutes before he died

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Anon likes watermelons | /r/Greentext

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anons gf pulls out an uno reverse | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/22(Sat)23:05:40 No.71340544 enough.jpg 582 KB JPG >find "dominant" girl >everything goes well for a while, love being held down by her during sex >today she tells me that she wants to switch roles and get her brains f----- out by me i can't do this s--- anymore 12/10/22(Sat)23:37:57 No.71340835 12/10/22(Sat)23:39:32 No.71340849 12/10/22(Sat)23:43:17 No.71340897 : Anonymous : Anonymous : Anonymous Cut to the chase and go gay already. Find a match on Grindr and get TOPPED, unironically. Plenty of dominant partners there to treat a sissy like you.

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anon takes a college course | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Huh? REHE. HUNEAN 6 KB JPG 12/11/22(Sun)00:29:37 No.890541111 >Be me >Redditard who sees posts all the time saying that the US overfunds their military and underfunds their healthcare >Take college course this year on US healthcare >We spend 19% of our GDP on healthcare and 3% on the military >Huh? Am I retarded or are the dems?

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Femanon on life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous f--- this, anons 13 KB JPG 12/10/22(Sat)08:12:04 No.71335145 >be me, femanon >extremely autistic >no friends online or in the real world >no family that i can tolerate either >never been on a date, never had a real boyfriend, khv >can only date online >have an online partner but we havent spent much time together lately >have nothing to do all day >read all my books, played all my games >have no money to get more >cant get a job at all i just come on here, and spend my entire day here. it sucks, anons, im sick of doing this every single day. id kill myself if i wasnt a p---- 58 Replies / 7 Images View Thread

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Anon is so fucking badass | /r/Greentext

Anonymous we did a little trolling We do a little trolling 81 KB PNG 12/10/22(Sat)13:50:17 No.71341299 >be me >work at a gas station >we get a new crew member >it's a guy from Russia, speaking skills aren't perfect, but at least we can understand him >he tries his best to master his English, constantly asking us what would we call this and that, which word to use, etc >idea.jgp >my co-workers and I decide to start telling him incorrect things names every time he's confused or curious about them >mfw he's been referring to petrol as diesel and vice versa >mfw when it's his turn to pump the s--- to drivers >75yo granny asks him to fill it up with petrol >mf takes out the diesel pump and fills her fuel tank to the brim mixing two incompatible combustibles >granny kicks off her car and drives away >2 weeks later >Local news: 75 years old veteran dies in a car accident caused by the engine malfunction is there any legal grounds for us to be arrested?

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anon does math | /r/Greentext

Board /biz/ - Business & Finance : Anonymous (ID: BQ3CbkEK ) 4210 GRA 4210% GRA 11 12 1 10 9 6 4. >be me >wage slave in a bank >eating lunch 12/10/22(Sat)16:41:29 No.52810851 31 ▼ Settings Mobile Home 2.jpg 166 KB JPG BOX 1 1|-3- 1 >two middle aged women colleagues next to me having a chat >one asks the other what 6 x 34 is >me in my head instantly: 10 x 34 is 340, half that is 170 add 34 is 204, takes me about 3 seconds >I sit listening to about a 5 minute discussion as they try to calculate the correct answer What's the deal with normies and being braindead? It's like they lack any kind of critical thinking Also, one of them is a senior mortgage advisor : Anonymous (ID: kZCyd/Bx) 12/10/22(Sat)16:42:59 No.52810854 they earn more than you loser : Anonymous (ID: 7GXKwjFT) 12/10/22(Sat)16:44:10 No.52810861 >>52810851 (OP) # you won't believe it, but people forget how to do s--- they don't do regularly

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Anon's flirting game is out of this world | /r/Greentext

BURGER KING >Hate fast food >Not even American >But the cute redhead working the drive thru always warms my heart Looks like it'll be another Double Steakhouse without tomatoes for me boys. 76 KB JPG Once i have my new car i'll ask her out. >Hey, without tomatoes as usual? >Yeah, cus' you're the only red thing i'd need on my burger heh! : Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat) 19:51:31 No.17513004 >>17512998 (OP) # don't use that line.

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Greentext Stories - Anon gets a job | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous Job Greentexts 10/23/17(Mon)23:27:58 No.40623659 225 KB PNG This happened last night. >Get job at McDonalds, need cash >Work in the back arranging the meals >qt 3.14 comes in with-8 yo daughter, asks for a chicken nugget Happy Meal >daughter is really polite to casier, says please and everything >throw in an extra nugget because of her kindness >few mins later, manager tells me to mop a spill >its right next to the mom and her daughter >evesdrop on them >"Mommy look, the people in the back gave me an extra nugget, why?" >mom replies, "Its because they're dumb enough to work here that they cant count" >mfw >mom and daughter laugh while I walk away Why are people so unappreciative?

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