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r/greentext • 20h [Removed by Reddit] [Removed by reddit on account of violating the content policy.] 9987 - 19h Anon smells his father's d--- 18h 206 : Most straight 4chan user Reply s Share 3.2k 801

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon discovers a conspiracy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 112 KB JPG 12/28/22(Wed)17:20:15 No.891568658 >if you like d--- you're gay >women like d--- therefore they are gay >wanting sex with gays is gay >you want to have sex with women >therefore you are gay The jews got you all, fagits

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Harry got in trouble again | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/22(Thu)02:58:56 No.178450538 calmly.jpg 111 KB JPG >HARRY DID YOU JUST WRITE ALL LIVES MATTERS IN THE FIRST FLOOR GIRLS LAVATORY? >JESUS CHRIST HARRY HALF OF HUFFLEPUFF WERE DUE TO DO THEIR GENDER CONFIRMATION IN THAT BATHROOM THAT NIGHT >THEY'RE ALL SWINGING FROM THE WOMPING WILLOWS HARRY, THE MINISTRIES SO FAR UP MY ASS THEY CHECKED MY GALL BLADDER FOR CYSTS >50 POINTS, THATS THE MOST I CAN AWARD GRIFFINDOR >He said calmly >>178455849 # >>178466514 # >>178466668 # >>178468840 #

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shitpost or post shit | /r/Greentext

190 KB PNG >be me >or not be me : Anonymous : Anonymous >>886783083 (OP) # to kys or to kys on stream 10/05/22(Wed)00:34 10/05/22(Wed)00:38 >>886783083 (OP) # Lurk many, post few

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Hermoine is cheeky | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: kDFdwd4f) 12/28/22(Wed)18:45:20 No.40999839 but Ron, that chocolate was mine... u better shut ur mouth u cheeky little c--- i swer to christ i'll hook u in the gabber m8 Cockney Potter.jpg 241 KB JPG >>409997953 (OP) # Maybe if you actually read the books, you'd know Hermoine has always been black you illiterate prole. Deathly Hallows page 234 paragraph 3 and I quote...... >"Voldemort is getting away on his broomstick Ron!" said Harry. >"Oh No Harry! How are we going to catch him " Ron replied. >Things looked dire indeed but just then Hermoine hollered at Harry and Ron from down the street. >"Yo crackers, I gots us some bikes now lets roll on that jive ass noseless m-----------!" >"Hermoine, where did you get these bicycles?" inquired Harry. >"Shieeeettttt....." replied Hermoine.

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Anon invents a new war cry. | /r/Greentext

File: 1460933417930.jpg (56 KB, 640x800) OP No matter how fast I run... I cannot run away from the pain.... >I trip and fall trying to enter my house >I get really scared in confrontation so I screamed something like "blarNEKNEK" >w-- did i just say >she just looks at me with disgust and starts to call the police i dont know what she says but i heard the word pervert Anonymous 04/23/16(Sat)23:17:22 No.680903636 >>680903871 >>680904036 >>680904294 >>680904352 >>680904545 >>680904616 >>680904621 >>680905661 >>680906362 >>680907520 >>680907912 >>680908066 >>680909314 >>680909325 >>680909716 >>680909773 >>680911860 >>680911876 >>680914047 >>680916711 >>680917567 >>680918768 ok im really scared right now i think the cops are coming >pee through my front door onto porch >do this often because it is easier than going to toilet >look around no one is watching >flow begins im honestly scared im not sure what is going to happen. can i tell the police it didnt happen? i think they might know i am lying because there is a pee stain on the wood from going there a lot please help >nice.mkv >all of the sudden i hear a small kid laughing from the right >mother and child walking >what the heck >mother sees me and becomes IRATE >she CHARGES ME OK WHAT THE F--- i am literally shaking i am scared because this is my moms house and they will call her if i get in trouble i am on the ground peering through the door and the cops are at my neighbors house that saw me Anonymous 04/23/16(Sat)23:34:02 No.680905887 >>680906023 >>680906163 >>680905673 dude I am not good with cops or violence or confrontation my mom said I might have autism but im not held back or anything Anonymous 04/23/16(Sat)23:34:55 No.680906023 >>680906163 >>68 >>680905887 (You) ...? What. Use the autism to your advantage. Anonymous 04/23/16(Sat)23:35:54 No.680906163 ► Antrymer23 V4/24/ 10(Junijo 1.00.01 190.000010072 File: 1456350034670.png (60 KB, 592x492) >this entire thread >>680917829 top blarNEKNEK Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:04:27 No.680918081 File: 1438769120489.jpg (22 KB, 480x360) anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:57:21 No.680924742 ► IMG_3925.jpg (141 KB, 571x787) KB, nonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:01:11 No.680917715 >>680917790 >>680905807 F--- this guy, punch the cop in the throat nonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:01:55 No.680917790 ► >>680917715 blarNEKNEK that bastard e: 1460627229324.jpg (30 KB, 533x388) SILA >blarNEKNEK >blarNEKNEK We got ourselves a new meme comrades >say I'm autistic (which I'm not) >is autistic blarneknek mfw me that taceog (14 KB, 2406251) Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:07:20 No.680918429 ► File: image.jpg (9 KB, 159x179) Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:08:53 No.680918661 ► File: 1724171 1017720024911202 (...).jpg (19 KB, 271x400) das it mane >>680918429 >blarNEKNEK Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)0 Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:07:13 No.680918420 ► 1427932631943.jpg (1.28 N File: tmp_4921-1461382626637150(...).jpg (112 KB, 872x960) ymous U4/24/16(Sunj01:09:12 No.680918698 6-04-24 14.08.25.png (281 KB, 442x412) Follow your dreams. >blarNEKNE >>680015004 MY SIDES RIN ANOTHER DIMENSION nonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:09:26 No.680918732 2343353e-5077-4fed-8892-e(...).jpg (24 KB, 600x436) >>680921586 ›larNEKNEK'd Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun) Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:31:45 No.680921515123499086.jpg (184 image.jpg blarNEKN now blar NEK NEK >>I get really scared in confrontation so I screamed something like "blarNEKNEK >something like "blarNEKNEK Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)00:37:36 No.680914743 >>680914925 >>680915146 >>680915400 >>680915423 >>680915627 File: IMG_3923.jpg (154 KB, 591x806) the cops left but they said they have to call my mom they were knocking at the door so i tried to act like I was going to sleep so i used this trick that i did when i was little i said "sleep, sleep, sleep" 3x out loud but it didn't work Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)00:38:50 No.680914925 I File: peepee.png (23 KB, 684x830) ok they are knocking at my door and on my street and I am just laying in bed making grunting noises because you guys said to act retarded so thats what i am going to do please if anyone knows what to do i am really scared and do not want go to jail they seriously bust thru my front door and said what the heck were you doign to them I was stuttering and stuff but just said i am autistic (which im not) as a cover up and saw the pee thing in a video game and they believed me so im good Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:50:31 No.680923842 ► Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:10:58 No.680918 File: common_scub.jpg (10 KB, 181x182) >blarNEKNEK Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:08:43 No.680918634 ► >>680914743 op ur of genuius >blarNEKNEK oh god please someone save this >>680903636 (OP) >what the heck Best thread in months thank you autistic op >>680917832 blarNEKNEK nymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:33:31 No.680921763 ► my mom came home and is telling the cops about me i have headphones in listenin to creed because it calms me down. there are 2 different cops here now i honestly don't give a heck who believes me this was one of the scariest nights of my life and thank you to the people who actually helped who said i should act retarded (im not) but it worked This thread made my day. s 04/24/16(Sun)00:50:41 No.6 Users DefApps App.pg (3 BlarNEKNEK AART 19038 QUEBECSAMERS.COM 658 >>680907698 >>680907922 >>680908002 >>680908330 >>680909314 >>680911860 inymous 04/23/16(Sa This is f------ gold Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:37:22 No.680922239 ► >>680922065 >puts op and autistic in different categories 4 Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:32:45 File: 1379381122037.gif (2.03 MB, 250x1 Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:24:04 No.6809 Anonymous 04/24/16 (Sun)01:03:30 No.680917983nYyBgs(...).jpg (38 K File: 1458135410813.jpg (59 KB, 355x417) BlarNEKNEK blarNEKNEK >>680903636 (OP) >I screamed someth like "blarNEKNEK 1:34:39 No.68092190 Anonymous U4/24/16(Sun)1:02:15 NO.68091/8324010409400. (o nd, 230x219) File: the miracle of life.png (336 KB, 442x412) blarNEKNEK Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:02:15 No.680917829 op literally blarneknke'd himself out of this >>680914743 > sleep, sleep, sleep > told them I am autistic > I'm not autistic >sleep, sleep, sleep Op, who are you trying to fool? Anony 1312831525132.jpg (56 KB, 768x576) >>680914743 >saw the pee thing in a video game blanNEKNEK >>680915904 >OP not autistic Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:39 You are a legend op Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)00:42:36 No.680915400 ▶ File: 1654190.jpg (4 KB, 200x200) Cam nymous U4/23/16(Sat)23:36:23 NO.686231 ▸ sSvjsm_400x400.jpg (18 KB, 400x400) >>680905452 this n---- goin to jail fam 04 (7 >>680914743 >"sleep, sleep, sleep" 3x out loud >>680903636 (OP) >blarNEKNEK ек Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:59:15 No.680924995 ► disgusted.gif (83 KB, 395x281) >>680914743 >sleep, sleep, sleep 3x out loud but it didn't work >>680914743 "said I am autistic (which I'm not)" >pee through my front door onto porch >blarNEKNEK >>680924742 >listenin to creed onymous 04/24/16(Sun)01:21:21 No.680920259 ► creenshot_2016-04-23-21-18-29.png (1.39 MB, 1080x BlarNEKNEK Anonymous 04/24/16(Sun)00:57:20 No.680917229 ▸ ZOZHe hlarNEKNEK 16624

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Anon has a schizophrenic episode | /r/Greentext

>first day of university >see a guy talking with two girls >they are talking about "pink floyd">say "aaaaaa it's the black killed by cops" 97 KB JPG >They look at me >I feel awkward >girl says "no...it's not" >leave I cried that day, I didn't know that kind of boomer music exist, I'm from a Latin American country and I didn't even live in the city, how was i supposed to know? And I realized after that the watermelon on my shoulder made me look like a peasant. I still like it after anyways, but sometimes in "another back in the wall" I remember that moment and ruins the songs to me.

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Anon is femboy-maxxed | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 ⠀ onymous Settings Mobile Home 12/26/22(Mon)16:48:13 No.71556835 have two sides ...I'M PRETTY DARN CUTE. IMG_20221226_085834_831.jpg 59 KB JPG >be me >born in a white country >as an asian 1 Reply EA AH >male >and short (5'2 110lbs) >get called cute by women but too autistic to hold conversation >inherently shy and submissive What can I do robots? Is it over? View Thread : Anonymous 12/26/22(Mon)16:54:11 No.71556870 Might not be if you're still young and into dom mommy stuff. You'll probably find a cougar to pick you up. What kind of Asian are you? t.hafu

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anon does not like FNAF fans | /r/Greentext

: fnafff.jpg (561 KB, 1920x1080) SLETIC CATH Anonymous 12/28/22(Wed)14:42:24 No.622498609 ► >>622498762 >>62 >>622498971 >>622499140 >>622500469 >be zoomer >*get Silent Hill* >"eww so dumb, no jumpy jumps" >*get FNAF* >"OMG BEST GAME EVER THINGS JUMPED AT MY FACE AND I PEED" >> Anonymous 12/28/22(Wed)14:43:47 No.622498676 >makes up character >makes up thing for that character to say >gets mad about it

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Anon has a trans daughter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: gzEC/8ei) De-trans'd my daughter in 1 da(...) 12/22/22(Thu)16:53:56 No.409306658 151 KB JPG >daughter says she's trans (9th grade) >wtfdo.jpeg >confess I'm trans too >she's confused >dad no you're not >stop being a bigot Charlotte, let's do this together >wear dress and makeup next morning >daughter is angry, tells me to stop faking >no, I'm trans honey. now get in the car and let's go to school >she's horrified, asks to be dropped off a block away >nope, walk her in, wave to front desk >she's fuming >wife can't stop laughing >pick up daughter, in skirt and heels. s----- makeup, glitter on cheeks. skip your to her and her friends >DAD STOP ITS NOT FUNNY >demand she use my pronouns, call her a bigot >next morning she's done with the whole trans thing, begs me to stop Is being trans now just the 90s version of goth? Definitely not cool when your parents do it. Lean into it and shame them out of it

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Jameson puts venom back in his place | /r/Greentext

116 KB, 500x583, Venom_h173.jpg View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO Anonymous Sun Jun 10 08:24:17 2012 No.37604759 View Reply Original Report Quoted By: >>37604901 >>37605289 >>37605339 JAMESON YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME PETER PARKER IS SPIDER-MAN View Same Google iqdb SauceNAO j-jonah-jameson.jpg, 15 KB, 360x247 Anonymous Sun Jun 10 10:28:29 2012 No.37606825 Report Quoted By: >>37607030 >>37607070 >>37607082 >>37607254 >>37607288 >>37607295 >>37607362 >>37607550 >>37608164 >>37608333 >>37609010 Yeah, I know... ..what, you thought I didn't know? Kid walks in, baggy clothes and a bunch of posing shots he couldn't have possibly taken of anyone but himself? Of course it's him. But I'm not gonna tell him. Men this day and age don't have the initiative and drive they used to. Girls break their heart, and what to they do? Post about it on their facespaces or mytwits, or whatever. And in walks a kid trying to make a difference, and some change, and you think I'm just going to pat the kid on the back? Hell no. Men crave competition, and an adversarial force to chase them on. I give the kid the works, so he gives the city results. You tell a kid he's doing well, and he gets bored. A Spider-Man can't get BORED. You, on the other hand, are what happens when everyone tells you you're gonna be great, and then it doesn't pan out. You had nowhere to go but down. And down you did. Is that thing even sanitary? You gave up after one case and got freaky with space goo? What sort of fabrege ego did you have? I don't have to tell Parker I believe in him to get him to be a hero. You needed approval to keep yourself from going insane. Who's the real man of integrity and valor. Now get the hell out of my office. I have tomorrow's headline to pick, and you were fired eight years ago.

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Anon likes milk | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 76 KB JPG 07/20/21(Tue)16:27:38 No.64646556 >go for a walk >walk into a store >get a carton of milk >go outside and open milk >walk around while drinking it >enjoying life >everyone starts looking at me >few people start laughing >keep drinking milk what the f--- is wrong with people can i not drink milk?

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It's you Patrick! You're the American Psychological... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Favorite anime lines (Sun)15:07:39 No.140245384 161AA42A-EDA1-4F0D-832B-B18023B797D1.jpg 50 KB JPG > "Now you'll see... When I really go Mob Psycho." Anonymous >>140245384 (OP) # He didn't say that. 10/04/20(Sun)15:08:00 No.140245402

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r/greentext • 20h [Removed by Reddit] [Removed by reddit on account of violating the content policy.] 9987 - 19h Anon smells his father's d--- 18h 206 : Most straight 4chan user Reply s Share 3.2k 801

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