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: Anonymous 01/04/23 (Wed)05:49:18 No.71684507 How to Punish a Dog Flashbang him 1 IMG_8781.jpg 105 KB JPG > be me > Rustfag > having a brief kinda mini job interview over the phone regarding a potential programming job > You know, the kinds you have before an actual one is set up. > I ask the girl on the other end of the phone which languages they use at the place. > "Oh we use mainly English and Swedish around the office." Bruh this lady more autistic than I am

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon tries to impress | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 139 KB JPG : Anonymous + 12/13/22(Tue)21:33:06 No.127136876 The Crusher of Croatia 12/13/22(Tue)21:35:12 No.127137287 >>127136876 (OP) # damn that acne I remember 3 years ago I tried to flirt with a girl at work by picking a few of my strategically placed zits so I had pus oozing out of my face in the shape of Japan. I laughed and said 'save Japan from volcanos! lick my face". she got grossed out 35 KB JPG

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anon hates modern marketing | /r/Greentext

I hate the f------ rebranding of the poverty lifestyle: >Micro Apartment You rented a room. 2 MB GIF >Tiny house You bought a trailer with some cosmetic s--- on the outside >Van life You basically bought an RV >Uber/lyft Gypsy cab, you got a f------ unlicensed cab. >Air BnB Couchsurfing for 4x the price Are they going to rebrand motorcycles as "micro cars" next? Putting a fresh coat of paint on your poverty doesn't make you rich.

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Ah yes Video Games | /r/Greentext

Board /v/ - Video Games : Anonymous 85 KB JPG : Anonymous 53 KB JPG : Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 01/03/23(Tue)17:13:47 No.623140349 60 KB JPG >it's 2023 >spiders outnumber humans 1000:1 >games aren't being made with spiders in mind "Progress" is a myth and arachnophobia is as real as ever. 01/03/23(Tue)17:23:25 No.623141280 >>623141746 # >>623145395 # >>623145876 # >>623146727 # >>623149248 # >>623150653 # do any spiders make for sociable pets or will they only ever run away or crawl on you thinking you're terrain. ? 01/03/23(Tue)17:28:28 No.623141746 >>623141280 # They are extremely skittish and kick their itchy abdomen hairs into the air when they feel threatened. They can bite, but that's not their first or immediate line of defense; it should be noted, however, that tarantulas, like all spiders, possess venom, though most of the time the venom won't land you in the hospital unless the tarantula is from Asia or Africa.

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How I imagine Roman family drama | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous How do I accept my son is a bo(...) 185 KB PNG 07/31/22(Sun)19:45:42 No.26999122 >be dad >Have gay son >Ok still love him it's 840 AVC >Meet his BF from his Legion >Way more of a man th son >Just know >F--- wife >Break down crying midsex + 41.9K The thought of my son getting his inside... rearranged just like his mother is too much to bare... How do I live knowing he's the bottom

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the feels bros | /r/Greentext

File: 1346981613984.jpg-(53 KB, 400x400, illinoise.jpg) SUFJAN STEVENS Come on feel the invites you to ILLINOISE Anonymous 09/06/12(Thu)21:33 No.28034254 Q Dear /mu/ I have a story to tell you guys. >be 16 years old, live in a small town in Illinois, complete 'pleb' who liked Linkin Park, SOAD, etc. You know the deal. >use /b/ irregularly, one day I click on /mu/, because why not? not weeaboo s--- like the other boards >see a thread on pic related >download it, become obsessed with and even buy it on CD >listen to it time after time >completely socially retarded, two friends, both of whom are also socially retarded >go to to f------ church every weekend, not because my parents are religious or anything but because it's part >i'm not an r/atheist either really, just find church interminally boring >one e day a new family shows up in church and sits next to us >they have a really, really cute daughter my age >brown hair, blue eyes, around 5' 4", pretty as all f--- >"h-hi anon, i'm new to this town, want to show me around?" >blue eyes open wide and look straight into mine, first time i'd made legit eye contact in two years >this is love at first sight >"o-ok... there's really not much" >i take her around town and show her all the s----- main street stores >turns out she's from new york and she likes this small town atmosphere >she goes to my to my school but we don't have that many classes together, still, she sits with me and my two loser friends and pretends to be interested in our stupid conversations about vidya and s--- >always sits next to me, always >we have one class together, chemistry, and she asks to come over to my house to study once a week >"okay" (in my head: F--- YES OH MY F--- YES) >we lie on my floor or bed studying together, all this sexual and romantic tension >we always listen to her music, which is always 60s pop like The Beatles, The Supremes, or Sam Cooke. s--- like that Anonymous 09/06/12(Thu)21:33 No.28034264 >>28034254 (OP) >one thursday, I put on Illinois, which by this point i've listened to like 100 times >start singing along to it for no reason >"you have a nice voice, anon, you should sing more" >we stop >one by one the songs wash over us p studying, just lie on bed in complete silence >i can remember every detail of that day - the plain brown sweater she had on, the light rain outside, the carrots my mom gave us as a snack >casimir r pulaski day comes >this is my favorite song, and i tell her that, breaking like 20 minutes of silence >we look straight into each other's eyes, and when sufjan sings 'kissed you on the neck', i kiss her on the neck gently 200 >holy f------ balls i'm blushing so hard it's not even funny, and she starts laughing >what the f--- did I do did I just f--- up so hard what the f--- am I doing costanza.jpg'd myself f--- everything >she kisses me back on the lips, eventually evolves into full-on makeout session gene >afterwards we go back to silence for a few minutes and then make out again >the greatest day of my entire life >i walk her back to her house, 20 minutes away, leave her at the front door with another kiss >"anon... are we boyfriend and girlfriend now?" >"yeah... guess so." >she smiles so f------ big i want to die >> Anonymous 09/06/12(Thu)21:34 No.28034282 @ >>28034264 >walk back to my house listening to casimir pulaski day the whole time >1 1/2 years later, we're still dating and still hang out with the loser friends, life is amazing, we want to get married >one day she gets sick, headaches, dizzy spells, etc >one day develops into weeks >she goes to hospital and finds out she has an inoperable, extremely malignant brain tumor >i watch her quickly descend into not even recognizing who I am >her face remains beautiful through out Shor >her eyes still paralyze me >34 days after she she goes to the hospital she dies, f------ 10 days after Casimir Pulaski Day >it's been a year since and I feel extremely suicidal, don't go to college, mostly sit in my room and play video games and listen to the Promise Ring all day >forgot about this site, came back and there were a lot of feel threads >i don't know what i'm going to do ever in my life. I still masturbate to her every night and feel guilty afterwards. I haven't felt anything for anyone but her since the first time I looked in her eye. i don't want to kill myself cause I don't believe in the afterlife but I need something to do that's doesn't remind me of her, this is the most writing i've done in a year. i need to get the f--- out of my house and this town, but i'm not rich and i can't make it by myself in this state. H-hold me, /mu/.

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Anon realises that there's no justice in this world | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/03/23(Tue)19:54:25 No.71677426 ► >See my neighbor (creepy unemployed incel) (30m) talking to a 24 year old child (f) who works as an adjunct professor at my college, laughing about some movie >Overhear him ask her to come see another movie with him, can't hear her the response tho >She is a woman under patriarchy AND her little brain is not fully developed, there is a huge power imbalance, she can't consent >6 year age gap, there is no way they could even have anything in common, he is clearly grooming her >notallheroeswearcapes.jpg >call the police >they won't do anything about it and threaten consequences if I keep calling them >Apparently this is "legal" There is no justice in this world.

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anon is in too deep | /r/Greentext

GO AWAY! BAITIN! 10 KB JPG >swear off 4chan because of glowniggers and honeypots >promise myself to never go back to 4chan >back in 1 week f---! they got us by the balls! why is this s--- so irresistible????

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Anon outsmarts his peers. | /r/Greentext

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Anon grieves for the gaming industry | /r/Greentext

6:02 Board /v/ - Video Games Gamers are f------ retarded LABOR OF LOVE Cybe 2017 855 KB PNG >etc >promise the world and more >hype the game to stellar levels >mislead everybody with your marketing and forbid pre release reviewers to show the true state of the game >game is literally unplayable on most hardware >runs like dogshit >half the features are missing and will likely never be added into the game >game is so f------ dogshit it's getting pulled from stores and m------------ Sony is giving refunds >some systems are literally worse than those of 20 year old games >abuse devs and make them crunch for years on end ▼ Settings Mobile Home 01/03/23(Tue)15:04:32 No.623129392 this world is f------ beyond salvation and CP2077 proves it >always online bs >lack basic features of the genre like player customization fast forward to current day: >release an edgy anime with blood and t--- >legions of redditors suddenly praise this piece of crap as "an underrated masterpiece", immediately dismiss any and all criticism "because they had fun". Anonymous >probably getting ready to preorder whatever dogshit they put out next and people complain about the state of the gaming industry, while incessantly lowering their standards ܒܩܩܩܩܩ €4/09/20(+83)46.08:01 No.623129679

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Anon discovers tipping culture | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: mGrGJx0Y) 08/26/15(Wed)12:34:55 No. 50418020 File: Monkey.jpg (882 KB, 2560x1440) >Go to America >sit down for a burger >eat burger >waitress comes over and gives me the bill >I place some money on top of the bill >she's still stood there, drool leaking out of her mouth >"S---, I forgot you have to tip" >pay an extra few dollars >"Th-Thanks for the good service" I say >she looks down >"Gee thanks for the good tip, here's a tip" >hands me some money back >"Uh... Ok" >I get up to leave >a giant greasy hand grabs my shirt >I feel paper being stuffed into my pocket >it's the guy who sat at the table next to me >"Here's your tip for being a good customer" >"Ok..." >As I go to open the door to leave a family comes in >The father holds the door open for me >"Thank you" I say as I go to walk past him >his extends his open hand and coughs >take the greasy dollar out of my pocket that the random guy gave me >he just looks at it and lets go of the door >"Only a dollar? F------ tourists" >everyone in the restaurant starts staring at me and whispering "cheap scum" >hurry out the door >get shot immediately as I leave >it's a police officer >"Sorry sir, I thought you were black" >ambulance arrives >>50418103 >>50418206 >I have no money to tip them >they just give me a blank stare >"f------ really?" says one of the paramedics as he begins to pack his equipment away >they leave me at the side of the road >get a ticket from a police officer for making a mess on the floor with my blood >he gives me another one because I didn't tip him for the first ticket At least the burger was nice anyway.

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Anon remembers the 1st black President | /r/Greentext

File: first black president.jpg (11 KB, 480x360) Anonymous (ID: towIdaty Reply] 02/06/18(Tue) 23:25:28 No.159548327 >played jazz sax >could reliably hoop a free throw >ordered fried chicken on every Airforce One flight >almost lost his job over some phat white ass Was Bill Clinton the first black president?

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Zoomer anon discovers classical music | /r/Greentext

Anonymous npc music consoomer 1.37 MB JPG 01/03/23(Tue)12:37:24 No.71676442 >uncultured normiefag always listening to whatever music is popular >rare occasion people ask what I listen to and I say no music only podcastmaxxing since I know theyll judge me for my lack of taste >zoomer me passing the national arts Center on my escooter before I get a haircut >see cool painting of old dude on art Center billboard >use Google lens to identify artist >get haircut, go home, plug in escooter to charge overnight, coom to degen p--- and then listen to identified artist >turns out I like it a lot >Messiah by George Fredric Handel >National orchestra playing one of his symphonies next week at arts Center >see student price is only $15 for any seat so poorfags like me can go >amazed by the discount, get $180 front balcony seats for price of a haircut >listen to his music and some other classical composers before I attend, learn about history and types of classical music briefly as well >s---, shave, shower while listing to sum moar classical bangers on my Google homes throughout my apartment >go to show, enjoy it a lot, mostly old (rich) people but had great seat and booked 3 more shows during intermission >go home, coom to p--- parodies of Mozart f------ some femoids, start making playlist of iconic works >fall down deep rabbithole on YouTube and read ebook on the definitive history of classical and baroque music >see Spotify listening stats on spreadsheet and amazed how far Ive c-- in so little time Zoomers why arnt you classical musicmaxxing yet?

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Greentext Stories - Rust is different | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 01/04/23 (Wed)05:49:18 No.71684507 How to Punish a Dog Flashbang him 1 IMG_8781.jpg 105 KB JPG > be me > Rustfag > having a brief kinda mini job interview over the phone regarding a potential programming job > You know, the kinds you have before an actual one is set up. > I ask the girl on the other end of the phone which languages they use at the place. > "Oh we use mainly English and Swedish around the office." Bruh this lady more autistic than I am

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