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: Anonymous 31 KB JPG 04/11/21(Sun)19:03:21 No.63170875 >be me >19 y/o guy >gf and i start getting touchy for the first time >she suddenly stops >"ill be right back anon" >she ducks into the bathroom >start getting bored >15 minutes and shes still in there >turn on the tv >spongebob >girlfriend comes back out in lingere >she tries to get me horny again >too distracted by spongebob i f------ love spongebob

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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The Wheel Breaks the Butterfly | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 94 KB JPG 21 02/05/23(Sun)21:56:50 No.72110743 >tfw start wageslaving full time tomorrow

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anon goes to ohio | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 6 KB JPG 02/05/23(Sun)14:26:41 No.2402417 >be me, born and raised in sault MI >largest population center in like 200mi, have never been anywhere else >imagine how wonderful other places in the world are >flash forward to last month, visit ohio cause i hear good things from fudgies >everyone is fat and stupid >monolingual >"syrup" is literally just sugar sludge >play football instead of hockey, refs cry and s--- their pants at the sight of blood >barely anyone has ever been skiing, they call me rich for regularly attending local trail >uninspired protestant churches instead of beautifully intricate catholic architecture >no glorious freighters traversing the tourist corpse filled waters of st. mary's river, just nepo rich kids on a speedboat in a polluted lake >no dispensaries or casinos >bud light or bust, apparently >candy shops and *REAL* ice cream parlors are a rarity >no greek restaurants, pizza is trash >regularly get f----- over by state gov, never riot, just allow themselves to get cucked how have we been in a feud with ohio for so long when we are obviously superior?

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That sounds like when a grandmother says “that’s nice honey” to you | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 268 KB JPG 10/04/21(Mon)12:03:42 No.65633274 >have 6.75/10 chubby butterface gf >tiny fat boobs you can cup in your hands, but 10/10 nips+areolas, like genetically perfect form >foreplaying and i decide to play with them >rub both of them in 7 million ways, no noticeable change in her behavior >stop kissing her and go for a kiss on a nip once >she gestures for me to go suck it >nonstop about 5 minutes of slurping it >no change in her behavior, it feels like i'm pestering a simple mass of tissue >eventually stop >still no change in her attitude >ask her if i did well >she puts a giant grin on her face and goes "you did perfect" what the f--- just happened?

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/pol/ discusses Ukrainian mobilization | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: aktqdyTb IS S H Department for Levelling Up, Housing & Communities Jam United Kingdom LEVEL HP MP LP ATK DEF SPD gee Sponsor (Host) Ipswich 02/05/23(Sun)15:33:28 No.414941532 Dear refugee host, Embassy of Ukraine inquiry to the UK governmen on precising the Ukrainian refugee status This letter is intended as notification that the Department for Levelling Up, Housing and Communities and the Home Office of the UK Government under the Inquiry of the Embassy of Ukraine in the United Kingdom URGES the Ukrainian refugee sponsor (host) to PROVIDE the respective authority by letter or by e-mail with the following data: 1) Whether the sponsor hosts or hosted a Ukrainian refugee(s) 2) Whether there is (are) a male person(s) among the refugees aged 18 plus 3) In case a male person(s) left the residence, report his (their) possible location and other available information 4) A male Ukrainian(s) aged 18 plus personal info: name, surname, middle name, age, current location of residence. : Anonymous (ID: vaoiYR4r RESULT The sponsor MUST urge refugee residents to visit the Embassy of Ukraine in the United Kingdom to SPECIFY their personal data individually. Failure to do so MIGHT result in a lower financial benefit for the sponsor. With every good wish, >You escaped Ukraine? >You are a refugee? >Come back and die for Greater Israel >First warning Rt Hon Michael Gove MP Secretary of State for Levelling Up, Housing and Communities Minister for Intergovernmental Relations Rt Hon Michael Gove MP Secretary of State for Levelling Up, Housing and Communities and Minister for Intergovernmental Relations Department for Levelling Up, Housing and Communities 4th Floor, Fry Building 2 Marsham Street London SW1P 4DF Email: report@levellingup.gov.uk Next 2 Michel Conven And the west are still defending u*raine That's actually scary 25 +1 20 +2 22 +1 12 +0 7 8 >>414942798 # >>414942825 # >>414943918 # >>414946527 # >>414950285 # : Anonymous (ID: QAwt+gHP 2009 1675590339319298.jpg 115 KB JPG 30 January 2023 02/05/23(Sun)15:36:51 No.414941732 >>414941532 (OP) # >Department for leveling up 02/05/23(Sun)15:36:54 No.414941734 : Anonymous (ID: QZZXOSEL Atelier-Meruru-The-Apprentice-of-Arland_2012_02-06- 12_020.jpg 184 KB JPG LEVEL UP!! >>414944355 # >>414944872 # >>414945346 # >>414946162 # >>414946631 # >>414950142 # >>414950714 # >>414950935 # >>414951130 # >>414941532 (OP) # >MIGHT lower benefits. Top kek Britain has no balls. 02/05/23(Sun)15:37:02 No.414941746

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Anon summons a janny | /r/Greentext

⠀ DO NOT TRUST ANYONE WHO GREENTEXTS LIKE PICREL DO NOT TRUST ANYONE WHO GREENT(...) > S 8 KB JPG 1 Reply 02/05/23(Sun)17:13:36 No.415016500 Usually these f------ are for gun control, China, n------, trannies, vaccines, and everything else s----- on this p------------ website. Anonymous (ID: M5xmyZWR) [+] View Thread 02/05/23(Sun)17:15:06 No.415016657 >>415016500 (OP) # > S someone post cp and nuke this thread

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Anon's drinking habits | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/05/23(Sun)16:50:01 No.72107138 wp6408913.jpg 200 KB JPG > wake up > have coffee with liquor and Irish cream just to make myself able to start my remote job > begin to feel dread as the very light buzz wears off > sometimes have one (1) beer at lunch (like the euros do with wine) > begin drinking as soon as I clock out, to when I go to sleep, sometimes as low as 4 drinks, usually around 6 or 7, sometimes 10 or 11 uhhh am I an alcoholic? I really don't want to go to AA .I don't want to live without alcohol?

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Anon helps his mom. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/06/23(Mon)13:23:06 No.72115778 >Be me >Helping my mom recover her Facebook on her 2014 phone >Sees a picture of her with my late dad, haven't seen his face in years >2014 2gb ram budget phone 5 KB JPG starts to choke >Scroll to her friends list accidentally >Bunch of shirtless men and even a basedjak looking mf >related image

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Anon can’t find girls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 489 KB PNG 02/05/23(Sun)15:06:31 No.72111555 Where the f--- are you even supposed to meet women to date? >All the local hobbies groups are 99% male and the girls there are either d---- or taken >Women aren't in bookstores or libraries that's a meme >They aren't hanging out in local parks >I have been to Catholic, Orthodox and protestant churches >Every single time the population of those churches are either young guys or old folks >Not a single young woman in sight >The ones that go to clubs/bars are mega sluts >You get zero responses on dating apps as regular or below average guy My retard gen Xer father keeps telling me "to go for it" BUT WHERE? BUT HOW? When I have been on dates with zoomer and millennial girls they are so socially retarded. You can be as friendly and confident as you like, but these modern females will hate you for the most arbitrary and random reasons.

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Anon gets some new shoes | /r/Greentext

: Stormy, Cheery Knight 395 KB PNG 02/05/23(Sun)17:53:31 No.72111385 >finally get some fresh new kicks >wore beat up Timberlands for years >wear new shoes >people immediately start treating me better r9k incel bros... were we simply shoecels all along?

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Anon makes a confession about feet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 136 KB PNG 02/05/23(Sun)22:27:52 No.72114084 >be me >lel at footfags >start noticing some girls I know have nice long feet, but like flat >notice this years ago and note girls with long flat feet >new Taylor Swift video has her feet shown clearly >lel at this and post it >people say I'm a footfag for screenshotting pic, I don't believe it >decide to fap to feet and test this theory >need to find feet pics >find a girl I know and scrape her insta >organize all pics to where her feet are visible >start fapping >it's like when you find nudes of a girl you know >amazing fap, I feel like I'm violating her and she's nude >c-- so hard since I've essentially seen her nude feet and she doesn't even realize (w--?) How has this happened. I go to church often. I eat vegetables. I vote Republican. What's gone wrong : Anonymous Youre a Christian conservative. Every Christian conservative has a dark sexual secret. 02/05/23(Sun)22:31:35 No.72114134

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Anon is only doctor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/23/17(Thu)18:46:11 No.75186156 >Be me >King doctor in fancy Doctor castle >Spending evening testing theory that boiling water cures plague >Instead makes peasant scream for 45 minutes and die >Weird.manuscript >Remember that Christmas is right around the 107 KB JPG corner >Go down to basement where I keep all of my peasant corpse toys >Realize there are not nearly enough corpses to do my yearly peasant corpse themed bonfire >Christmasisfuckingruined.romanesqueart >This will simply not do >I will not allow the local peasants persistence to continue living get in between me and my delicious burning serf bonfire >Hatch plan >Grab plague rat from jar that keep under my bed >Makes me kinda hungry looking at it >Ignore nagging hunger and proceed to lurk into the night towards the towns well >Drop yummy rat into well >Wasteofameal.valutedroofs >Go back to bitchin' Doctor castle and Huff herbs >A week later the entire town is knocking at my door with the plague >Yisssss.mosanart >Spend week using pointiest doctor stick to beat plague out of revolting plague ridden plebs >Use entire supply of leeches >Try to put leeches on some of their assholes to keep a couple from not dying >Some reason leeches do nothing >Weird.gothicpainting of them f------ die >Mfw >Went a bit overboard >Ohshit.reliquary >Entire town gone >Christmas comes >F--- it, best bonfire yet >Huff herb in front of 100 foot tall mound of flaming serf corpses >Brings tear to eye >AChristmasmiracle.alterpiece >Probably gonna have to move elsewhere because entire town is dead >Oh well enjoying moment >I am only doctor

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Kinda rooting for this to be real | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Co 118 KB PNG 01/06/22(Thu)09:25:03 No.66872932 be me >student >have to present my project >30+ people in online meeting >start talking with my webcam off >teacher says open web >get anxious, start mumble rapping my project >cute girl in my class texts me in dm and tell me "it's gonna be ok anon, take a deep breath" >anxiety intesifies >keep mumble rapping >get decent mark >cute classmate dm again and tell me it was ok and she thinks my shyness is cute I think I'll pass out

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Greentext Stories - Now that is a Battle for Bikini Bottom | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 31 KB JPG 04/11/21(Sun)19:03:21 No.63170875 >be me >19 y/o guy >gf and i start getting touchy for the first time >she suddenly stops >"ill be right back anon" >she ducks into the bathroom >start getting bored >15 minutes and shes still in there >turn on the tv >spongebob >girlfriend comes back out in lingere >she tries to get me horny again >too distracted by spongebob i f------ love spongebob

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Uploaded Feb 06, 2023 at 09:31AM EST

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