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e: beub.jpg (138 KB, 1080x720) Anonymous = 11/24/14(Mon)19:19:34 No.33711808 ► >>33711842 >>3371189 File: foldert.png (670 KB, 1312x876) Doesn't matter. You're in my folder now. An cand am TI LLEIT G2 span1 741 M Amara Candles Cand and Canadian Cinidin CE andphon 103 Bruk? r com Aminka Aven Schaden PRE:944 BINARY ACCES Ravin French 7 Irish Inka Jalgra ca racian mora D-inu Janina San Arab- Agen Apen Aperk war Auson 2 Abalond Autoland Auslar! Aution Act Auto Autor! Main L Anonymous [ 11/24/14(Mon)19:10:58 No.33711472 ► >>33711584 >>33711619 Can I seduce scandinavian girls? I will go for holy days. Pic is me Thanks. Chec CHih FIER Kond E CH 2 HOP.CO T S Bran.co Fun 17 French 8 min Israel 2 Anonymous 11/24/14(Mon)19:21:50 No.33711902 ► >>33711808 This is very unsettling. Man Cole now Garkalam Thang hoy Harpoon Kaland ATILA Bild 13 Countila Marcha Kwall six Edd Bikin 13 Corbi K Kebab Baskoni croada PICTER > French Tunisian Let's Cod 3ENG 1 Hamon. this Zal Dukkha FORRE Parl MJ B Belgeler n B kebab French Israel Italian 2 Anonymous E 11/24/14(Mon)19:20:22 No.33711842 >>33711808 thats normal Durd -FON S F

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Anonymous 139 KB JPG 12/19/24(Thu)15:28:13 No.928849473 >Be Rose >Throw away a priceless jewel worth hundreds of millions of dollars >Could have made her family financially secure for generations but says no for le epic symbolism >Reminisces about the man that saved her, but also hogs the floating door like a selfish pig, killing him. (Watch the Mythbusters episode) This is one of the greatest love stories ever told? Dude, Rose is a f------ bitch.

Anonymous (ID: 9Mc0Hnwf 12/19/24(Thu)15:49:03 No.491828169 1.94 MB JPG >sells your gold reserves >basically completely crashes your economy >Canadian dollar crashes >tells leafs to anhero with suicide pods if they get too sick >imports 6 gorillion pajeets to fight over a single Tim Horton's >gets offended when basically only neighbor that has been decent says they would be better off annexed Why leafs? Why?

: Anonymous 05/26/22(Thu)13:13:15 No.68790277 196 KB PNG >Go on omegle >say im interested in politics >match up >ask them about their political opinion >take the radical extreme opposite of the answer >get them riled up >write a question of catalogues >they type for over 2 minutes >disconnect before they can send me their shittext 4 victims today

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Anon leaks the secret lingo used by enlightened individuals | /r/Greentext

Anonymous ATTENTION!!! Thanks for your attention 477 KB PNG 02/18/23(Sat)16:21:17 No.72278564 >sister barges in my room >tells me a pair of her panties are missing >"theyre prolly at chads apartment" >she looks confused >"whos chad" Goddamn it I promised myself I wouldnt let the lingo from this place leak out irl Anonymous >>72278564 (OP) # stop wearing your sister's panties, f----- 02/18/23(Sat)16:25:28 No.72278601

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/17/23(Fri)19:10:12 No.894533395 >>894533754 >>894536797 File: 16942013375584.jpg (19 KB, 400x400) >Be me >Like to do a little trolling >Make a trip down to my local Wal-Mart >Go into the restroom >Find a closed stall >peek through to make sure pants are all the way down >Start shaking the door violently >"Occupied" >Shake the door harder >"dude stop" >Shake door even harder and faster >"IM GOING TO KICK YOUR F------ ASS IF YOU DON'T STOP" >start shaking door at mach speed >hear belt buckle clanging around implying he's pulling his pants up >immediately start running out >casually sit on bench outside bathrooms >dude runs out of the bathroom >runs right past me >doesn't notice me >there's a kid about 14 or so walking towards the exit >guy assumes it the was kid >starts screaming at a random kid in the middle of Wal-Mart for something I did >hold laugh in from distance >run outside >laugh

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Anon is in trouble | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/11/11(Sun)18:07 No.10286882 >They kick down my door >I have dragon dildos hanging from the ceiling >Just in case this day comes >They fight their way through the dongs >There are casualties >They bust down my bedroom door >I'm wearing a G-string >Backwards >Covering myself in olive oil >Extra oil on my balls >Playing with my n------ >Moan as loudly as possible "YOUR MOVE, MR. LAW-MAN!" >Those cops will never be the same.

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Anon is meet autism person | /r/Greentext

11/06/16(Sun)15:36:19 No.710790240 Sorry for s------ English I'm Germany but today encountered I on Autismus the Street Autism Person >am me >walk happy down Street because I've new Headphoneset Anonymous 131 KB JPG >then see I very very weirdo Person that runs and the Hands is flapping >Say him "Hello there, not normal!" >And he gived me instant Sorrow that I did that >follow me fast with much cry of "ÖÖÖNNNGHÜOÜÜÜHNN" though entire Street >he is fast and gives not f--- about car in Street that him is moving very fast >he becomes hit by Car >I run like Devil out of Scene

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Anon asks /pol/ to man up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: Bz2T3f6C ) [ 02/17/23(Fri)19:35:55 No.416607732 DVE DE PART INCIPAL CO MY BLACK DAUGHTER NEEDS A FATHER FB_IMG_1676684080993.jpg 60 KB JPG Well /pol/? Step up and be a real man. JONA FOCALIST

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anon is socially incompetent | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>57162185 # if a woman touches my chest is it an invitation to touch hers as well? 08/28/20(Fri)05:50:11 No.57162525 Sorry I have trouble socializing so I have to learn these things >>57162671 # >>57162921 # 08/28/20(Fri)06:06:43 No.57162671 : Anonymous >>57162525 # >if a woman touches my chest is it an invitation to touch hers as well? No, sadly.

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Anon seriously needs help | /r/Greentext

Need help ID: a7D3jHjP No. 416648953 1 hour ago 1674493467849925.jpg JPG 21.2 KiB 484x384 United States So to start off, my mom and me live together. Recently, she had a car crash and injured both her arms. I've had to wipe her a------, and vagina as well as bath and clean my mother. Thanks to her opiods she has been alternating between crying and being sexually provocative every time I clean her privates. This disgusts me and makes me want to kms, I f------ hate clown world. How do I escape this hell, is their any cheap alternative to hospice care? ... If my mother tries to get me to f--- her one more time I'll shoot myself

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Anon uses RegEx | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: OL3kp9Mk) Anonymous 02/17/23(Fri)04:53:55 No.91594194 ✓ >>91584652 >>91588087 $ grep -iE "m[aeou]h[aeou]mm? [aeou]d" NOFLY.csv | wc -1 312755 $wc - NOFLY.csv 1566062 NOFLY.csv 02/17/23(Fri)03:57:07 No.416519196 >>>/g/91575935 # 20% of no fly list is MUHAMMAD kek 33 Replies / 5 Images muhammad.png 64 KB PNG View Thread

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What did Dumbledore mean by this? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 180706433 13 hr ago ... >hogwarts at end of 1890s: extremely diverse, lots of black, Asian, Indian, and even Hispanic students. Also notable trannies in hogwarts and hogsmeade >hogwarts at the end of the 1990s: 95% white, a couple of token Asian kids, one or two black kids. Zero trannies anywhere near the school Bros what did Dumbledore do during his 50 years as headmaster? 9 REPLIES Anonymous 180706445 >>180706433 Lucius Malfoy was in charge of the admissions policy. 1 REPLY 13 hr ago...

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Anon love his autistic girlfriend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >have gf >shes an autistic medical student >be autistic econ degree who posts on 4chan >she loves science and examines bacterial samples for fun >buy her a microscope for her birthday >we have sex later >c-- on her stomach >"wow anon that was great but i need to get up" >think she didnt like the sex 10/09/20(Fri)15:06:46 No.60397618 >she just wanted put my semen on a microscope slide >shes standing there naked examining my sperm under a microscope >we spend an hour examining my sperm and using stats to determine my fertility >she gets aroused by the sperm density >have sex again I love this woman but our children would be mega autists

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Anon gets a gym partner | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.93 MB GIF 02/10/23(Fri)10:00:50 No.69907281 I remember unironically getting a young girl as my gym partner out of the blue one time. >a regular at first ever gym I signed up for usually around 3pm >notice a family always showing up dad/mom/daughter >dad/mom use the gym it seems like a day care, go workout and just let girl do whatever >they come in around the same time and like clockwork do their thing and do nothing for the young girl >notice the young girl kinda just hangs out at the carpeted area laying down or trying to enterain herself the first few times till I notice her walking around the gym and looking at things trying to figure out how to use machines >one day while deadlifting, finish a set and go to the locker room to drink some intra >go back and girl is sitting on the bench I brought over and just sitting there >smile and say excuse me, immediately gets up and just like stares at me as I deadlift >feel awkward as she doesn't leave so ask if she's ever deadlifted before >no >ask if she wants to try >probably due to being super bored she immediately agrees >get her to deadlift a 20lb curl bar, immediately super excited >parents see us together, wave her over and they leave >think nothing of it >next time I go to the gym doing my thing when out of nowhere girl shows up and is just standing in front of me as I dumbbell bench >hi >oh hi >again just stands there till I ask if she's ever bench press'd before and again she says no and again I ask if she wants to learn >>69907721 # It got to the point that the moment she showed up she'd run to me and we'd workout together and when it was time for her to leave her parents would actually start to wave bye to me as well. 02/10/23(Fri)10:57:45 No.69907721 : Anonymous >>69907281 # That turned out to be such a nice story. I wonder if she still lifts.

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anon is walter white | /r/Greentext

File: Walter_2008.png (454 KB, 525x700) Anonymous 02/17/23(Fri)21:27:49 No.894514969 >>894515011 >>894515073 >>894515093 >>894515424 >be me >p--- artist >family is super catholic >family doesn't know about my hobby >brother joins some popular circlejerk facebook group about hating p--- >they see r34 as extra sinful for some retarded reason >they also dox rule 34 artists >ohno.jpg >ffw like a year >brother is a respected member of the group >brother comes to me to ask me to help him with smthg >comply since i wanted to spend more time with him >he wanted me to help with the facebook group >shows me the artist he's trying to dox >looks familiar >realisation hits like michael jackson's d--- hitting kids >mfw its my f------ art >use an alias so he doesn't know >pretend i dont know and try to lead him in wrong direction >he takes the advice i give him >gtfo >realise if family finds out id be disowned >panic >mfw im walter white

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Greentext Stories - Anon Has a Folder | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

e: beub.jpg (138 KB, 1080x720) Anonymous = 11/24/14(Mon)19:19:34 No.33711808 ► >>33711842 >>3371189 File: foldert.png (670 KB, 1312x876) Doesn't matter. You're in my folder now. An cand am TI LLEIT G2 span1 741 M Amara Candles Cand and Canadian Cinidin CE andphon 103 Bruk? r com Aminka Aven Schaden PRE:944 BINARY ACCES Ravin French 7 Irish Inka Jalgra ca racian mora D-inu Janina San Arab- Agen Apen Aperk war Auson 2 Abalond Autoland Auslar! Aution Act Auto Autor! Main L Anonymous [ 11/24/14(Mon)19:10:58 No.33711472 ► >>33711584 >>33711619 Can I seduce scandinavian girls? I will go for holy days. Pic is me Thanks. Chec CHih FIER Kond E CH 2 HOP.CO T S Bran.co Fun 17 French 8 min Israel 2 Anonymous 11/24/14(Mon)19:21:50 No.33711902 ► >>33711808 This is very unsettling. Man Cole now Garkalam Thang hoy Harpoon Kaland ATILA Bild 13 Countila Marcha Kwall six Edd Bikin 13 Corbi K Kebab Baskoni croada PICTER > French Tunisian Let's Cod 3ENG 1 Hamon. this Zal Dukkha FORRE Parl MJ B Belgeler n B kebab French Israel Italian 2 Anonymous E 11/24/14(Mon)19:20:22 No.33711842 >>33711808 thats normal Durd -FON S F

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