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O Anonymous 03/27/23 (Mon)01:58:40 No.72720514 [Reply] ► >>72720625 >be me in highschool >stoner >always skip school to smoke with friend who is also stoner >always meet up and school then leave to go smoke >only place near the school that's secluded is a drain, basically a tunnel that you can sit / crawl in but not stand >one day we're in the drain and we notice a bong, not ours >there are others >write a message on the wall, "hello?" >come back a few days later, underneath is written "hi" >h-------- >start communicating with the unknown stoners >become friends >we always use their bong because it's better than ours even though it sits in a drain (we were gross) >one day friend comes and says he has some great weed >go to smoke it after school even though I need to take a s--- >end up smoking for ages and it's completely dark >we go to leave, but I want one big hit from the bong before we go >take the biggest rip possible >oh f--- >cough so hard I start to s--- my pants >rush out of the drain, wipe ass with leaves and ditch underwear, friend asks what's wrong, I say don't worry about it I'll be back in a sec >think it's not that bad >go back to drain after half an hour of blindly wiping in the dark >friend is still there >"what the f--- is that smell" >"I don't know what you're talking about bro" and go to take another hit from bong >he turns on light from phone >it's everywhere >I look like Augustus Gloop when he fell in the chocolate river >finger marks of s--- all over the bong where I touched it >friend almost vomits >he is a bro though, helps me clean myself using a puddle >we get most of it >we leave, forget about the bong >take the train home, people are getting up and moving to other carriages >come back a few days later >bong is gone >new message on the wall >"what the f--- is wrong with you, why did you smear s--- all over our bong? Kys" >never got another message on the wall or saw the bong again I miss you drain buddies, sorry about your bong

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon dislikes therapy | /r/Greentext

平 Anonymous 01/15/22(Sat)00:17:30 No.870679987 >"you should see a therapist" >"you need help" >"what do you mean? psychology is a legit science" >>870680093 >>87068 Do these imbeciles not know that psychology is such a scam of a "science"? All a therapist does is listen you bitch about your problems while responding with blue pilled b-------, all the while delaying on purpose your treatment so they can extend the amount of overpriced sessions that a friend or anyone that minimally cares about you can do the same. I don't even know why so many people get into psych when it's a low-paying and low-employment rate job... Therapists act like they know more about you than yourself and have to act under APA guidelines which btw are super blue pilled (they believe conventional masculinity is a personality disorder) to "help" you. I don't know why people think therapy is an actual solution to mental illnesses, when sometimes it can worsen the problem if the therapist is incompetent... Not to mention that it's ruled by women, nuff said

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Anon feels bad for gen z | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2006-2009 18 KB PNG 06/28/21 (Mon)00:19:36 No.64342984 Was 2006-2009 the era where everything went to s---? >iPhone released, Twitter and Facebook started to boom >Google bought YouTube >Debut of The Big Bang Theory and popularizing of "nerd culture" >7th generation games had muddy brown graphics, shovelware, and waggle. Start of "cinematic" games. >History Channel went to s--- with non-history shows like Ancient Aliens and Ice Road Truckers >SciFi Channel became SyFy >High School Musical came out, Justin Bieber started making music >America's Financial Crisis >Tumblr founded >Hip hop was killed by Soulja Boy, Gucci Mane, Lil Wayne, and Pitbull >Nu-Futurama >Family Guy became s--- >Death of Micheal Jackson It was just an awful time all around, I feel bad for zoomers who have nostalgia for it. View Thread

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anon gets bullied | /r/Greentext

File: tomato.png (16 KB, 211x239) O w-- Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)12:09:42 No.72718607 [Reply] > be me > 16 > look like a tomato when my face turns red > get really hot and sweaty in every season but winter > turn bright red when i play sport or exercise > chad bullies me and calls me a tomato > p-----.jpg > get angry and shout at chad > she starts crying > runs out of restaurant > the staff run out and comfort her > get even more red > he calls me a burnt tomato > ff to a week ago > on my first date > qt 3.14 girl from my school meets me at restaurant > she orders f------ tomato soup > face is already red because im shy > fml.jpg > she tells me to look into the soup > "look, they must have given me an extra tomato" > years of bullying boil up > grab bowel of soup and throw it at her face > "whos red now stupid bitch" > ff to yesterday > new kid transfers from neighbouring town > really sickly, goes really white when about to vomit > kids joke that he goes green like broccoli > chad gets an idea > locks me and him in a classroom in burning summer heat > says hes making vegetable soup > his friends throw water through the window > new kid cries and vomits on my shirt > "wow, looks like the tomatos been seasoned" is my life f----- /b/ros? can i come back from this?

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Anon finds a hilarious article. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: (U8hAAFRw Far-Left Magazine Shuts Down After Indian Migrant Editor Allegedly Rapes Antifa Activist The migrant r---- the organizer a second time after she made him read feminist essays httpsnational file.com far-left-magazine-shuts-down-after-indian- 05/16/20(Sat)04:34:31 No.257622530 migrant-editor-allegedly-rapes-antifa-activist.png 124 KB PNG https://nationalfile.com/far-left-magazine-shuts- down-after-indian-migrant-editor-allegedly-rapes- antifa-activist/ : Anonymous (ID: CulpTOOvv) → 05/16/20(Sat)05:41:26 No.257628578 >>257622530 (OP) # This entire article is like one big "what the f---". : Anonymous (ID: RMCORrFO) 05/16/20(Sat)05:41:28 No.257628586 BASED PAJEET. 193 KB PNG : Anonymous (ID: zwvNBRvr Hudson Bookselle Escape Refresh EDKglNuXUAInMgk.jpg 158 KB JPG This is him in the mustache. Anonymous (ID: tRIcLBfO) >>257622530 (OP) # 05/16/20(Sat)05:43:39 No.2576288 Why did the slut report it? Does she hate migrants that much? She should have shut her mouth for the good of diversity. Stupid racist. >>257622530 (OP) # Alpha as f--- Based poos at it again >Raven, an African-American former sex worker, is a prominent advocate of mass migration and releasing illegal aliens. 05/16/20(Sat)04:56:31 No.25762 H--------. Based as f--- poo. : Anonymous (ID: cVAzhKRj >>257622530 (OP) # >Khanna had been abusing her and then committed a r--- against her. Raven then confronted him, demanded an apology and asked him to read 98 KB PNG four feminist essays. After Khanna agreed to read the articles, he r---- her again, the accuser says. : Anonymous (ID: RYZ7uKMK) Anonymous (ID: 12EiU7fX) >>257622530 (OP) # Based and lasagnapilled. >>257624807 # >>257624858 # 05/16/20(Sat)04:58:31 No.257624645 Anonymous (ID: s3pdd71F) 2 KB JPG hambeast? 05/16/20(Sat) 05:3 >>257624645 # That was probably what the others told her the first time. v1wisgsgkkgz.jpg 591 KB JPG >No, don't you see? The alt-right will use this to hurt the poor brown refugees. Show how stronk you are. For them. >Gets r---- a second time: "f--- this s--- I quit." Anonymous (ID: SjTlknrt) [+] 05/16/20(Sat)05:00:14 No.257624807 05/16/20(Sat)05:21:11 No.257626722 >>257625271 # >Former Sex Worker >"Former" OH NO NO NO NO Am I supposed to feel bad for that Anonymous (ID: (hmZY1/Vr) Based Pajeet 05/16/20(Sat)04:38:18 No.257622866 >>257622530 (OP) # >the migrant r---- the organizer a second time after she made him read a feminist essays 05/16/20(Sat)04:57:59 No.257624601 I no ask for vegene I TAKE

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Anon meets a new friend | /r/Greentext

File: Fishing pepe.png (6 KB, 306x165) Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)11:40:25 No.896539025 >Be Me >Live on the California bay >Be in around 6th grade. >Newkid.jpg >on the first day of school, meet nice boy named John. >John was a little weird, but he was popular. >He befriends me >Everyday after school me and him and his friends would go to the beach >He would stare at the ocean while we'd be playing >He'd continue this for awhile >One Night, all of us are playing as John runs into the sea with a net >Ohshit.JPG >HE Gets deep into the water >The boys physically have to pull him out of the water >Pull him onto shore and let him breath >When he gets up, we ask him why he ran into the water >He looked at us >"When i Grow up, I want to be, One of the harvesters of the Sea. I hope before my days are done, I want to be a Fisherman."

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Anon wonders what could be | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10 KB JPG 03/26/23(Sun)17:32:39 No.896554051 >be 6'2" white male so never any issues with dating >4 years ago >go on 2744847467th date or some >actually fall in love after 1st date >oh s--- oh f--- oh s--- oh f--- >go on 2nd date >be nervous and blow it >she texts me after and ends things >now, 4 years later >married with a lovely wife >still think about the feeling that one tinder girl gave me Why the f--- has she had such a long lasting effect on me that I'm still thinking about her after 2 dates 4 years ago?! Why didn't she want me man. PS I do love my wife and feel s----- that I sometimes think of this other woman sometimes. But I cannot help it. I wonder what life would be like if she didn't reject me.

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Anon Has Girlfriend Problems | /r/Greentext

File: babyplates.jpg (327 KB, 1500x1500) Anonymous 05/18/15(Mon)21:54:41 > cause theyre fine quality plates > they're really great plates > pic related its the plates No.616562327 > be me > gf gave me $ to buy "fancy dinner plates" > had no idea what to buy looked on amazon for 2 hours > finally found something > "what you pick for us?! ^_^" > "wait and see" > 4 days later a package arrives > gf opens it > she pulls out a set of 8 kid plates with bees on them > starts shrieking and cussing me out calling me a f----- for wasting money on this s--- when she said she wanted GROWN UP PLATES > they never broke tho

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a truly wonderful place | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous get me out of here 13 KB JPG 03/26/23(Sun)17:56:53 No.896555070 >be me >lost in italy >don't worry, all roads lead to rome, so surely I'll end up there if i continue walking down this path >end up in bucharest w-- romania

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femanon wants to seduce a married mexican man | /r/Greentext

File: 08A30921-FE99-46FB-AFE9-B(...).jpg (159 KB, 1242x698) How do I seduce a married Mexican man? Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)12:13:20 No.28622724 [Reply] >>28622813 >>28622743 >>28622745 Okay someone please help me. I'm in love with a trad Mexican man who is unhappily married to a Latina bitch (literally he is the hardest working person I've ever met and all she does is criticize him). It's been almost two years and way past the point of infatuation. Please help me. I think he loves me too, but would never leave his s----- situation because of conservative Mexican trad values. Showing all replies. Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)12:16:16 No.28622736 >>28622756 >>28622778 Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)12:17:55 No.28622743 >>28622724 (OP) Don't. Just don't. Don't be a homewrecker. You are going to burn a shitton of social standing with everyone in your life, and your prize will be a man that will bail on you for some cuter girl once you don't do it for him anymore. Just move to San Antonio and find some other good looking catholic b-----, hey're seriously not that hard to find >>28622778 Anonymous 03/26/23(Sun)12:19:08 No.28622745 >>28622778 >>28622724 (OP) >married Mexican man Could you possibly aim lower? Maybe try for a Pakistani p--------?

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The juice is loose | /r/Greentext

Anonymous I am the weapon 449 KB JPG 03/26/23(Sun)15:01:41 No.57625435 >stock piling firearms and ammunition >Blasting the following >400mgs test e E3D >200mg tren e/EOD >50mg Superdrol /ED >3IU HGH /EOD >Girlfriend broke up with me months ago >Job : Lost > Home : 90s 4runner >Snorting ketamine and cocaine >Destroying chipotle as my daily diet >Go out on dates with women out of my league by pretending I have money >Pound passable trannies if they don't give it up same day I have ascended from mere mortals and becoming a biological hormonal weapon

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Anon in the bathroom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Me in the bathroom 13 KB JPG 03/26/23(Sun)00:08:33 No.896517916 >Be me >Be in bathroom >See man >See him pissing >Idea.jpg >Touch his penis >"That feel good?" >He looks disgusted and attempts to pull up his pants >"Shhh" I tell him "it will be done soon" >I slowly start grinding my hand up his c--- >Not long later he c--- a huge sticky c------ >Success.png

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Anon attends a barbeque | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 61 KB JPG 03/25/23(Sat) 23:30:05 No.72711372 >be me >today was a weird day >my boomer dad was having this bbq with his freemasons friends >it was fun at first >but then it went on, and on, and.... ON. >mf went from 12:00 am to literally 12:00 pm with these people >it was fun at first but then I got tired, and eventually annoyed at these people >not at "them" but at the fact I just couldn't have some free time at a saturday >eventually just slip away and go to my PC >play a bit >browse internet >eventually remember of this new things of chat Al >its fun, talk until I get capped >go to youtube, youtube recommends some mental stuff s--- >panic attack >make this s--- gt lol Is this where boomer spend all their energy in? In Saturday BBQs?

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Greentext Stories - anon misses his bong buddy :-( | /r/Greentext

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O Anonymous 03/27/23 (Mon)01:58:40 No.72720514 [Reply] ► >>72720625 >be me in highschool >stoner >always skip school to smoke with friend who is also stoner >always meet up and school then leave to go smoke >only place near the school that's secluded is a drain, basically a tunnel that you can sit / crawl in but not stand >one day we're in the drain and we notice a bong, not ours >there are others >write a message on the wall, "hello?" >come back a few days later, underneath is written "hi" >h-------- >start communicating with the unknown stoners >become friends >we always use their bong because it's better than ours even though it sits in a drain (we were gross) >one day friend comes and says he has some great weed >go to smoke it after school even though I need to take a s--- >end up smoking for ages and it's completely dark >we go to leave, but I want one big hit from the bong before we go >take the biggest rip possible >oh f--- >cough so hard I start to s--- my pants >rush out of the drain, wipe ass with leaves and ditch underwear, friend asks what's wrong, I say don't worry about it I'll be back in a sec >think it's not that bad >go back to drain after half an hour of blindly wiping in the dark >friend is still there >"what the f--- is that smell" >"I don't know what you're talking about bro" and go to take another hit from bong >he turns on light from phone >it's everywhere >I look like Augustus Gloop when he fell in the chocolate river >finger marks of s--- all over the bong where I touched it >friend almost vomits >he is a bro though, helps me clean myself using a puddle >we get most of it >we leave, forget about the bong >take the train home, people are getting up and moving to other carriages >come back a few days later >bong is gone >new message on the wall >"what the f--- is wrong with you, why did you smear s--- all over our bong? Kys" >never got another message on the wall or saw the bong again I miss you drain buddies, sorry about your bong

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