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Anonymous C 04/26/23 (Wed)17:16:41 No.7310108 6 KB PNG > be me > working as a barista at a small local cafe > a 90 year old ish grandma comes in > orders a black coffee > makes her coffee and gives it to her > some time later > the old lady come back visibly startled > says its the worst coffee she ever have had > sad.exe

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Anonymous 139 KB JPG 12/19/24(Thu)15:28:13 No.928849473 >Be Rose >Throw away a priceless jewel worth hundreds of millions of dollars >Could have made her family financially secure for generations but says no for le epic symbolism >Reminisces about the man that saved her, but also hogs the floating door like a selfish pig, killing him. (Watch the Mythbusters episode) This is one of the greatest love stories ever told? Dude, Rose is a f------ bitch.

Anonymous (ID: 9Mc0Hnwf 12/19/24(Thu)15:49:03 No.491828169 1.94 MB JPG >sells your gold reserves >basically completely crashes your economy >Canadian dollar crashes >tells leafs to anhero with suicide pods if they get too sick >imports 6 gorillion pajeets to fight over a single Tim Horton's >gets offended when basically only neighbor that has been decent says they would be better off annexed Why leafs? Why?

: Anonymous 05/26/22(Thu)13:13:15 No.68790277 196 KB PNG >Go on omegle >say im interested in politics >match up >ask them about their political opinion >take the radical extreme opposite of the answer >get them riled up >write a question of catalogues >they type for over 2 minutes >disconnect before they can send me their shittext 4 victims today

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Anon has a point | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 19 KB JPG 2023 In the 90s 04/26/23(Wed)17:27:10 No.73101169 > on holiday with family > We must leave the light on in the house so thieves think we are home and dont break in > on holiday with family > Puts everything on social media > Pictures of the whole family who is enjoying themselves in a hot tropical beach > the house stands empty for everyone to know And people are still in shock that their house gets broken

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"Wubba lubba dub dub" | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 136 KB JPG 04/26/23(Wed)21:10:03 No.898257433 >ww3 has broken out and you have been drafted Anonymous : Anonymous What is written on your helmet anon? : Anonymous "I did it all for the nookie" 04/26/23(Wed)21:15:20 No.898257632 04/26/23(Wed)21:19:29 No.898257775 04/26/23(Wed)21:21:14 No.898257842 "Jannies are trannies" : Anonymous : Anonymous Skyrim is for the Nords 04/26/23(Wed)21:21:45 No.898257860 04/26/23(Wed)21:22:21 No.898257886

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Anon simps for cheetahs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2 : Anonymous Why are cheetahs the most gorgeous of all the big cats? What was evolution trying to maximize for here? 03/22/23(Wed)13:00:24 No.4469563 1560855952545.jpg 845 KB JPG 201 two-snow-leopard-cuddling-1033901914- c2e3ff5126904a8cb340f0ac4dac620a.jpg 150 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/22/23(Wed)16:19:16 No.4469605 >>4469563 (OP) # >cheetahs the most gorgeous of all the big cats? Not even close. Cheetahs have cow hocks and the curvature of their spine reminds me of goofy-ass cartoon horses. >>4469635 # >>4469735 # >>4470031 # >>4485185 # >>4493319 # : Anonymous 03/22/23(Wed)17:53:39 No.4469635 >>4469605 # The absolute audacity. Snow leopards could never hope to compete with the supermodels of the cat world. And cow hocks! You're lucky that cheets are the nicest of the big cats or you'd probably be at risk of being slightly abraded by their non- retractible blunt claws. >overly lanky >weak head 1674778047944.jpg 60 KB JPG >>4469737 # >>4470859 # >>4471281 # >>4475854 # >>4483041 # >>4493055 # 03/22/23(Wed)18:45:52 No.4469655 56 portrait-of-a-cougar--mountain-lion--puma--panther- 509738734-1310e31ef4a0491e9d6e08cae24b507f.jpg 1.06 MB JPG >facial expression that makes it look like it is worried that it is going to s--- itself 24/7 Cheetah is easily the ugliest of all big cats. >>4470809 # >>4478223 #

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Burning down the house | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/22/22(Sun)07:05:05 No.68730090 >my mom asks me to go help her childhood friend who is a redneck boomer tear down a house >begrudgingly say yes >get there, nervous to work as I basically haven't moved in 2 years >he's actually a good guy >gives me advice and we talk about life while we're working >after 6 hours of demolishing this house he tosses me a cold beer and gives me a c-------- >we smoke and drink and talk about politics >he gives me $60 for my work, tells me I did good work 1.35 MB WEBM >I head home drenched in sweat and dirt but proud that I accomplished something Specific feel, i wish my Dad wasnt such a retard f----- and was a good father figure

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Anon's sexual fantasies aren't surface level | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/16/23(Sun)13:13:56 No.72971783 300px-Scared_Hamster.jpg 12 KB JPG I'm a virgin who never dresses slutty, and my fantasies are all extreme fetishes and s--- that would turn me into the dirtiest w---- if i did them. Why?

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Anon cries | /r/Greentext

#1, No. 28828660 4/25/23 8:17:51 PM images JPG 225x225 9.1 kB >cry in public >"stop making a scene" >cry at home >"man up or I'll give you something to cry about." >cry in room >"stop sulking." >only cry when I'm certain no one else will hear it >"anon why dont you spend time with family more often?"

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Anon's girlfriend wants him to protect her | /r/Greentext

#1, No. 28830937 4/26/23 5:59:49 AM 684E26A5-0E1C-4167-8EFA-02AE711B7B1E GIF 245x400 862.9 kB >last week a guy was robbed one block from my gf house at 3 am >my gf says "if they come to rob me, I want you to attack them" >tell her to elaborate, she actually wants me to a john wick style movement and 1v2 guys with guns >"my boyfriend must protect me, i want to be protected" >i tell her i rather pay for her uber from and back home, a phone is not worth risking our life over She is really convinced of this, cannot make her understand my point

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"checkmate facists" | /r/Greentext

File: put77.jpg (109 KB, 736x484) [©视觉中国 Anonymous (ID: Z2GFWGXQ) 04/26/23 (Wed)10:41:12 No.424877900 >>424877962 >>424877982 > >Day 426 of the 2 day special operation >> Anonymous (ID:qft0iGfo) 04/26/23 (Wed)10:42:15 No.424877962 >> Anonymous (ID: Zstl0jE) 04/26/23 (Wed)10:42:38 No.424877982 ► >> Anonymous (ID: HjP13cjr) 04/26/23(Wed)10:46:21 No.424878170 ► >> Anonymous (ID: 7YDyrxe4) 04/26/23(Wed)10:50:20 No.424878381 ► >> Anonymous (ID: JukNYNGg) 04/26/23(Wed)10:53:25 No.424878541 ► >> Anonymous (ID: Z2GFWGXQ) 04/26/23 (Wed)10:59:44 No.424878863 ► >> Anonymous (ID: IY+nNG8d) +04/26/23(Wed)11:01:16 No.424878922 >> Anonymous (ID: BIFKRG11) >> Anonymous (ID: 7YDyrxe4) >> Anonymous (ID: BIFKRG11) >> Anonymous (ID: 7YDyrxe4) >> Anonymous (ID: Z2GFWGXQ) 04/26/23 (Wed)11:01:45 No.424878948 ► 04/26/23(Wed)11:02:51 No.424879011 ► 04/26/23 (Wed)11:02:59 No.424879018 ► 04/26/23(Wed)11:05:04 No.424879121 ► 04/26/23(Wed)11:05:04 No.424879122 04/26/23(Wed)11:07:04 No.424879213 ► >>424879422 □ Anonymous (ID: FIZSrA3D) File: 34545654734534.jpg (23 KB, 452x482) but comrade, they were able to build a lenin statue in some village so checkmate fascists

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Hello internet. Welcome to Film Theory!!! | /r/Greentext

File: statue of liberty.jpg (320 KB, 1600x1200) Anonymous 04/20/23(Thu)21:08:32 No.183305064 » >>183305144 183305181 >>183305219 >>183305276 >>183305359 >>183305397 >>183305671 >>183305677 >>183306117 >>183306392 >>183306441 >>183306612 >>183307025 >>183308756 >>183308905 >>183310886 >>183312584 >>183312746 >>183313221 How did they get the Statue of Liberty from Earth to the Planet of the Apes? It was never explained.

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Joe Rogans interview with a bear. | /r/Greentext

THE JOE ROGAN ENCE t7u1uxv6y9f11.jpg 59 KB JPG >Look Joe, name one animal that could stand a chance against me 1v1. Silverback, tiger, rhino you name it. Get us in a ring and I will maul them to death. It's simple as that.

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4 years later he's in 3000 dollars of debt from OF subscriptions. Truly a master of life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Life Hacks 07/23/19(Tue)11:10:55 No.53534008 >be me >Go to twitch >make a new account with real name >Search for low viewer female streamers. 147 KB PNG >Click follow. >9 of 10 times she will say my name and some qt s--- >save the clip Everytime i need some human interaction i just open a video of a qt3.14 saying my name Mfw i cheated the system.

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There's nothing funny about this greentext. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/26/19(Fri)01:01:59 No.805554270 >be me >going to college next month >quitting job tomorrow >work at best buy >hey anon what would be a good laptop for autocad >I mumble "f--- off" just loud enough for 69 KB JPG her to hear >she goes to manager >I deny everything and he f------ believes me and has the girl taken out by the cops cause she started to make a scene >MFW quitting tomorrow

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Greentext Stories - In her 90 years of living, anon makes the worst coffee she ever have had | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous C 04/26/23 (Wed)17:16:41 No.7310108 6 KB PNG > be me > working as a barista at a small local cafe > a 90 year old ish grandma comes in > orders a black coffee > makes her coffee and gives it to her > some time later > the old lady come back visibly startled > says its the worst coffee she ever have had > sad.exe

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