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: Anonymous 10/30/23(Mon)02:07:36 No.655745143 1686697080783442.png 2.22 MB PNG TOROMONT >"I don't kill people." >breaks every bone in a guy's arm then tosses him off a building >refuses to properly deal with a psychotic clown, which leads to dozens of people dying every few weeks

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

>she stops me, wants to roleplay >blindfolds me, we're playing doctor >kinky but okay >feel pressure around my ass >pull off blindfold 00 Anonymous (ID: zuq0 ITT: Weird sex experiences >be 22 >start dating blonde. 7/10 >shes quirky but fun > dat ass >second date >go to her place >shewantstheD.jpeg >go down on her >things are going well >crazy bitch is shoving 3-4 plastic horses into my a------ >she says my condition is "stable"

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Anon reaches "peak autism" | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 60 KB JPG 10/29/23(Sun)16:58:00 No.15799143 Anonymous >have zero small talking skills >have no friends >only social life is at a buddhist temple >meet old wealthy couple at a yearly festival >teach them about buddhism thanks to my autism >they secure a job for me This is it, I've reached peak autism. 1 Reply View Thread 10/29/23(Sun)17:37:43 No. 15799309 >teach them about buddhism >they give you a job what

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Anon doesn't like double standards | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/31/16(Sun)23:19:52 No.325997892 ► >>32601 File: 1453421252682.jpg (25 KB, 500x363) >go on twitter >see twitter lesbians gush about women >"i gotta to kiss a woman rn" >❞i need to suck mad t------" >remember the time I got death threats because i called my own girlfriend hot >mfw

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Don't forget | /r/Greentext

Start a New Thread View Announcement BORN EUSA DON'T FORGET YOUR DUTY! SERVICE TIVE Return Archive [Advertise on 4chan] THE NATION MAY NEED YOU TO SAVE IT SSS Show OP Comment: On SYSTEM Bottom Refresh Sort By: Bump order Image Size: Small Filters Search

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Anon dodges the draft by acting like a typical 4chan user | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: yqRr+NtH 10/29/23(Sun)20:03:46 No.446826939 >>446821169 (OP) # I've been intentionally tanking my physical and mental health lately in order to avoid the draft. >Haven't taken my asthma medication since shortly after the invasion >Haven't gone to therapy in quite a while either >Been eating like s---, mostly ramen noodles, buttered pasta, Mac & cheese, and Oreos >Haven't been exercising >Spend most of my time sitting alone in a dark room I've considered intentionally giving myself a heart attack or stroke to really make sure, but I'm afraid I might accidentally kill myself

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Anon lives in the big city | /r/Greentext

07/23/20(Thu)23:32:56 No.127376602 >DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city, it's so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like i'm in one of my favourite TV SHOWS. you should totally come on down to my studio apartment, it's got EXPOSED RED BRICK walls and everything, we can crack open a nice hoppy ipa or three and get crazy watching some cartoons on adult swim! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the barcade-listen here, right, it's a BAR where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go DRINK. BUT!!!!! it's also an ARCADE like when we were kids, so we can play awesome VIDEO GAMES, without dumb kids bothering us. speaking of which megan and i have finally decided to tie the knot- literally -we're both getting snipped tomorrow at the hospital, that way we can save money to spent more on ourselves and our FURBABIES. I'm f----- JACKED man, I'm gonna SLAM this craft beer and pop open another one!!! Anonymous 123 KB JPG

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Girlfriend music discovery on man’s favorite game | /r/Greentext

>be me 22 year old college student >have gf >gfs family member just died and for some reason has incredibly horny streak 633 KB GIF >she has be f------ me endlessly for days >don't think i have to worry about anything she has irregular menstrual cycle so i assume shes less infertile, pull out method all the way >one day im gaming, pulls me aside in lingere >herewegoagain.mp3 >says she wants to do it to some music she found >wait w-- is that the f------ pizza tower soundtrack? >it is. >Its the f------ noise's theme. >proceeds to f--- me into oblivion >not even kidding the best sex of all time in my life literally melting down there and can feel it up my spine >she is f------ me to the rhythm? >imboutablow.mp4 >literally buckets the most ever in my life I didn't last 5 minutes >FFD 1-2 months later >gf has stopped horny streak ever since that night for some reason. >gf has gotten really sick the past couple days >go to hospital and find out shes pregnant. >Mfw well guys my son/daughter was conceived from f------ pizza tower music, and my life is about to take a drastic change. Do not do your wife/gf to video game soundtracks.

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Anon loses the love of his life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 10/29/23(Sun)17:11:34 No.75234326 >Be me 6 years go >Browsing sketchy anonymous app >Some girl posts about wanting to lose her virginity before she kills herself >Message her because I wanted to get laid, didn't think she was serious >We talk for a couple weeks >She showed me what she looked like and she wasn't bad looking >End up meeting up >She was way cuter in person >Kinda tomboyish, visibly socially awkward >We hang out for a bit and end up f------ >She was actually nice to be around and I liked her >Tried to contact her again >She never responded I think about her almost every night. I never got her real name so I couldn't find an obituary. Don't know if she just ghosted me or if she actually killed herself

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Femanon gets the ick. | /r/Greentext

File: 1616844035258.jpg (74 KB, 429x429) 98 Anonymous 10/29/23(Sun)12:31:35 No.75229370 >get the ick from someone >decide i don't want to be friends anymore >actively avoid them >leave when they arrive >they still can't take the hint >outright unfriend them >they still can't take the hint >and now they're gossipping about me spreading rumors i hate people so much take the I you disgusting freaks this behaviour literally proves i was rught to get the ick

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Anons get watches. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 43 KB JPG >go to a coffee shop, see a cute girl >sit next to her and strike up a conversation. >she seems uninterested keeps checking her phone 10/29/23(Sun)17:06:21 No.75234267 >be >32 year old virgin >save up for months to buy a fancy Rolex >finally get the Rolex, feel like a million bucks >suddenly, Rolex starts ticking loudly >girl: "Is that your watch?" >me: "Uh, yeah, it's a Rolex." >girl's eyes light up, suddenly interested. >girl: "Wow, that's impressive. I love expensive watches." Anonymous >we chat she's into me because of the watch >exchange numbers, plan a date later virgins 90 KB JPG 10/29/23(Sun)17:07:38 No.75234281 >>75234267 (OP) my rado gets me girls

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Anon has a dating plan | /r/Greentext

File: 123.gif (1.83 MB, 498x409) why not date a friendless loser? Anonymous 10/29/23(Sun)11:03:49 No.75228798 >>75228833 >>75228851 >>75228859 >>75228885 >>75228886 >>75228907 >>75228933 >>75229170 >>75229311 >no chance to cheat on you >entirely dependent on you for emotional support >all their spare time can be spent with you >you can influence them a lot more >>75228897 >you dont have to be jealous or paranoid about them >they will think you're the best thing in their life, the best they can ever get, and worship you sounds like a good deal, right? Anonymous 10/29/23(Sun)11:07:55 No.75228833 File: _3947.jpg (92 KB, 523x410) >>75228798 (OP) # Because I'm a friendless loser who doesn't know how to make any friends Anonymous !ItWB4Junas 10/29/23(Sun)11:10:05 No.75228851 >>75228798 (OP) # the flaw in that logic is that females like that are as rare as unicorns i already struggle with making acquaintances/friends myself, my chances of finding a girl like that are the same of finding a very specific grain of sand in the sahara desert Anonymous 10/29/23(Sun)11:11:28 No.75228859 >>75228798 (OP) # and thats exactly my type Imao. if theyre intelligent too, holy f--- i fall hard

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Anon loses his cool | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous shutterstock 10/29/23(Sun)14:17:14 No.908471216 659 KB JPG >be me >uncircumcised and have serious anxiety (important later trust me) >hanging out with girl I have a crush on >things happen and eventually we start making out >it seems like things are going to go all the way as she pulls my pants down to suck my d--- >thing is I haven't showered since the morning and it was late at this point so I knew my d--- stunk >immediately stop her from giving me head >I'm a nervous wreck at this point and trying to figure out a way to explain why I stopped her >she keeps asking me what's wrong and if I don't want to have sex >feeling this maybe once in a lifetime chance slipping away I blurt out that I was sexually assaulted as a kid when my nanny performed oral on me and I'm traumatized by oral sex >she completely understands and we end up having sex thankfully The problem now is we've been together for 2 years now and I haven't gotten any head since and it's killing me. I don't know if I can live this head- less existence anymore.

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Anon is depressed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ME AFTER BARRY 10/07/21(Thu)14:34:23 No.65671748 THINKING ONCE (1 TIME) 333 KB JPG > be me > Get really depressed one day > reply to a email in university telling them Im depressed. > send RA to my room > its a female that hits all my boxes > try to look away as much as possible while I tell her Im not gonna kill myself I hate myself so much guys

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Greentext Stories - Unironically, is he stupid? | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 10/30/23(Mon)02:07:36 No.655745143 1686697080783442.png 2.22 MB PNG TOROMONT >"I don't kill people." >breaks every bone in a guy's arm then tosses him off a building >refuses to properly deal with a psychotic clown, which leads to dozens of people dying every few weeks

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April 2025 4chan Sharty Hack And Janitor Email Leak

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