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File: 1A664342-4B95-4AFB-9325-8(...).jpg (17 KB, 736x618) I hate this Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)08:38:02 No.915836205 [Reply] >be me >>915840699 >live in a family of 3, mom bro and me >try to play vidya >Brother using PlayStation to watch Family Guy while playing on his laptop >Family guy is paused so I turn it off >"Youre not doing that!!!" >Brother goes to get mom, I explain what id going on and how he can keep frying his brain with Family Guy on his phone and still play >my mom shouting at me at how ungreatful of a bastard I am and how I do not help and and and >literally am talking normally and stating objective facts while she screams and yells at me >she tells me Im manipulative (?) Despite her saying I am a discrase as a son and how dare I not want to help anyone (I complained that I was out with her the whole day, shopping for s--- we dont need, getting yelled or scolded at half the time, and how I just wanted to relax a bit) >be banned from living room, be told to go to my room >mfw My life would be objectively SO funny as a f------ Comedy. But its real. And I genuinely have the urge to cut myself lol, humor is the only way I can escape, honestly I want to kms. I hate living here and going through this tourment every. f------. day.

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Anon is a super straight male | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/16/20(Fri)21:09:23 No.838004040 >be me >super straight male 153 KB PNG >it's a guy's moan mfw

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Anon is blackmailed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous _ESA ROPA SIMPLEMENTE NO PODIA 03/24/24(Sun)23:05:47 No.915858640 >20 year old >friends with a girl in college >met about a year ago >she's had feelings for me from SOPORTARLO. the start and is always trying to make me her boyfriend but I'm not interested in her, she's just a cool girl and friend 60 KB JPG >a couple of weeks ago I send her a d--- pic just to cocktease her for fun/for an ego boost (I'm around 9 inches and know how to anglemaxx to look even bigger) >she seems to become more obsessed with me afterwards but I don't take it too seriously >yesterday she tells me that she'll spread the pictures around to as many people as she can unless I date her Life has suddenly become a lot more stressful. I don't enjoy being blackmailed. : Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)23:31:49 No.915859630 >>915858640 (OP) # just f--- her retard >>915859925 #

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Anon went to protestant church | /r/Greentext

THS Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)21:04:29 No.915837060 >be me, catholic >>915837339 >>915837344 >>915837672 >have gf (protestant) who has recently turned back to the faith and intends to convert to catholicism >has accompanied me to Sunday mass a couple of times >yesterday, asked me if I'd want to go to her childhood protestant church this Sunday to see the differences >ok why not >we arrive, neatly dressed like usual, her in a nice dress and me in a suit and tie >literally everyone else is dressed like a total slob >like 30% of the other attendees are wearing sweatpants >mass commences >bunch of new age songs no one, not even the other attendees, really know the lyrics of so barely anyone sings along >sermon begins >literally a half hour monologue about Ukraine and Russia (a conflict that is now two years old) >called Russia (not Putin, just Russia in general) the "ultimate evil" >said Alexei Navalny is a Jesus-like figure who got killed for his faith >praised Zelensky (a jew) as the "ultimate defender of Christianity" > lamented about the Pope's recent call for peace between Ukraine and Russia, said there can never be peace aside from an unconditional Russian surrender >closed by praising Israel for their heroic defense against Hamas terrorists, but I didn't even pay too much attention anymore at that point are all protestant churches like this? even gf was shocked as she didn't remember it being this way.

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Make sure to pay a subscription and not buy outright | /r/Greentext

terminal wojak.png 170 KB PNG >........ I wish i consumed more media..... *BEEEEEEEEEEEP*........

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op takes matters into his own hands | /r/Greentext

File: gt 3.14 goth chick.jpg (20 KB, 236x393) God is Bu A help ☐ robots how do i stalk a girl and make it seem normal? Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)16:23:12 No. 76891774 >>76891781 >be 17 >qt 3.14 goth girl from my school >massive f------ crush, like it's ungodly >catches me staring all the time >think she thinks i hate her >give up fast forward a year >find name in year book >decide look up name on le hacker website >find a whole bunch of personal information (bitch cannot hide her stuff) >find address >decide to go to her house, to maybe smooth things over >comes out >does not like that >starts yelling >yells for father >father comes out, and starts yelling to >father punches me in the face, and i run away typing this as i s-- in my car. how do i smooth this over, and make it up to her? i really like her bros. picrel, very high resemblance to her

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Anon on Christianity | /r/Greentext

1028224F-6AE1-4BA3-B5BB-23F0253D4C7E.jpg 19 KB JPG >Conversation about Christian Theology >ACKTCHUALLY, Your god, YHWY, is actually the descendant of the ancient Pennsylvanian god PooPooPeepaloo, and his wife is the Goddess of Asshshart, who descended from the moon (goddess Lumariel) to teach them the art of Insert- Two-Fingers-Into/As, which is why you celebrate easter. (ASCHSHART = Easter). According to *HERETIC DENOUNCED BY THE CHURCH 1600 YEARS AGO, you guys actually have your whole theology wrong and my retarded retcon fanfic from r/Mythology is more accurate about Zoroaster and Pazuzu than the entire ecclesiastical authorities have ever known about Christ. Why?

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I tried watching 1 of his video and it’s literally true | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/20/22(Fri)23:48:11 No.68714289 8 KB JPG >hey guys it's critical >today we are taking yet another clip from my live stream of me watching a youtube video that somebody else made and getting a million views for what little I add in words with my boring dry tired voice >also, for comedic effect, I will stretch the image on the youtube thumbnail for the billionth time >please laugh

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Anon hates this trope | /r/Greentext

File: 1710633694657591.jpg (36 KB, 512x468) Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)13:37:34 No. 197582701 >>197582751 >>197582764 >>197582915 >>197582960 >Character walks into a bar >Orders a "beer"

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Employee is based af | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 189 KB PNG 03/24/24(Sun) 23:14:21 No.76890460 >new guy at work >kind of weird and retarded but nice and polite >talk to him during lunch >turns out he does art >he explains his universe and characters >notice something >the good and light faction are all tall plus huge boobs >the dark evil ones are short with small boobs >he doesn't comment on it at all, completely engrossed in his lore Yeah I'm gonna stick with that guy

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Anon is reseting his bro to default settings | /r/Greentext

mous (ID: NUзtoXWn) VIP 11/29/20(Sun)23:44:19 No.29389357 I have been putting testosterone pills in my gay brothers food and drinks for about 2 months now and he is starting to like women more. AMA

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Many such gay cases | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Is this guy closeted too?? 10 KB PNG >be me 03/24/24(Sun)15:48:31 No.30951550 >20m UK closeted bisexual >drinking with friends at someone's house for hours >we are all very drunk >time to sleep >sitting on upstairs living room floor next to a guy friend who is outwardly very homophobic and masculine but also basically an incel >can't remember how it was initiated but we start holding hands in the dark >continue holding hands in the dark while talking to others in the room >we squeeze each other's hand while holding them together and I use my thumb to rub the outside of his hand >without clearly thinking I stop holding his hand and start massaging his head >he doesnt react negatively at all and we continue talking to the others in the room while i rub his head in the dark >go back to holding hands >i decide to leave the room and sleep downstairs I know that this situation was pretty much me not suppressing my sexuality due to the influence of alcohol, but what does it say about the other guy? I'm certain that I was more drunk than he was. I never had any intention to do anything like that and I would never have thought he could be closeted.......

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anon wants some takeaway | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 681 KB GIF 1/29/2023, 10:19:16 AM No.11538405 > want to order take-out Mongolian food > google "Mongolian food xyz street" > no results > google "Mongolian food my city" > no results > know exactly where place is, zoom in on google maps > no results, doesn't display store > get frustrated, drive there and order at counter > phone dings > "Rate your Mongolian Food!" Why is everything worse now than it was in 2011

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Greentext Stories - Anon tried to win an argument against his mom | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

File: 1A664342-4B95-4AFB-9325-8(...).jpg (17 KB, 736x618) I hate this Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)08:38:02 No.915836205 [Reply] >be me >>915840699 >live in a family of 3, mom bro and me >try to play vidya >Brother using PlayStation to watch Family Guy while playing on his laptop >Family guy is paused so I turn it off >"Youre not doing that!!!" >Brother goes to get mom, I explain what id going on and how he can keep frying his brain with Family Guy on his phone and still play >my mom shouting at me at how ungreatful of a bastard I am and how I do not help and and and >literally am talking normally and stating objective facts while she screams and yells at me >she tells me Im manipulative (?) Despite her saying I am a discrase as a son and how dare I not want to help anyone (I complained that I was out with her the whole day, shopping for s--- we dont need, getting yelled or scolded at half the time, and how I just wanted to relax a bit) >be banned from living room, be told to go to my room >mfw My life would be objectively SO funny as a f------ Comedy. But its real. And I genuinely have the urge to cut myself lol, humor is the only way I can escape, honestly I want to kms. I hate living here and going through this tourment every. f------. day.

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