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Greentext Stories - Anon is british | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 09/05/16(Mon)08:33:08 No.702652974 >be britbong >having tea and crumpets with me mum >start thinking of Muriel from work >would like to have a little in-out, in-out with her >" 'scuse me mum, I...I need to have a go" >head over to the computation machine >it's off >slam it hard with me fist >"OI, TURN ON! I NEED A WANK" >it turns on >search for p--- >blocked >"bollocks" >run outside and find the nearest red phone booth >grab the tele and dial the p---------- administrator >"Ello? Her Majesty's P---------- Administration Centre. Who's this callin'?" >"Ello, I need a wank somethin' good!" >"Hol" on there, son. You need to give me your name and residence first." >"My name's Humphrey Throckwaddle III and I live at 3242 West Pennywood Lane" >"Alright then. And what type of p--- will you be wantin' today, Mr. Throckwaddle?" >"Cuckold, sir. Please hurry, me p----- is about ready to burst" >"Alright then, one moment please....and you are all set, sir. I have given your household 10 minutes of uninterrupted access to cuckold p---." >"Thank you sir! And God bless the Queen!" >"God bless her right! Cheerio!" >Race back home before the cuckold p--- time runs out >enter front door >blood is everywhere >go into kitchen >mum is dead >beheaded by muslims

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