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Anonymous they say that my mailuketes make is boring, then have to show them masenem itpihyve never seen belum 1.34 MB PNG 02/28/24(Wed)01:00:36 No.76603561 >be me, 13 years old >imagine yourself being able to freeze the time in order to rob candies at grocery store >ffw, in college >imagine yourself being able to freeze the time in order to grope girl's breasts and r--- them whats wrong with me? 6 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon questions post-apocalyptic firearms | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Why is this a trope? 05/17/24(Fri)13:53:37 No. 199243868 >~95 (or more) percent of humanity is gone 3.62 MB JPG >This means most global trade networks and trade routes are either completely unknown or will take long time to recreate >This means the knowledge on how to forge metal is also gone or will take a long to be rediscovered >Combine these two points and you get a scenario where the process of obtaining and making bullets will take VERY long amounts of time Now be Dawn of the Planet of the Apes >~95 percent (or more) of humanity has died of the 113 virus or some variation of the virus or a completely new virus that is as deadly as 113 >Forests have retaken the urban area of somewhere in California >Apes live free from humans >Dumbass human shoots an ape for no good reason >Caesar and fellow Apes follow human pack to urban area that has a lot of green >Tons of people have firearms as shown in pic Why is this a thing in media? Did humanity quickly reorganize in a nanosecond after ~95 percent of humanity died? Why not make and fight with something that is easy to obtain in regards to resources and maintenance (like a spear or a dagger or a bow or a sword or an axe)

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anon can't fight for shit | /r/Greentext

File: download.jpg (6 KB, 200x193) Why are normies so clueless about martial arts? Anonymous 04/06/24(Sat) 12:48:14 No. 193109 >>193122 >>193327 >>193351 >>194748 >Hanging out at a party >I find out some dude is a TKD blackbelt >He starts doing these faggy party tricks like kicking bottle caps off of sodas and twirling in the air using completely inefficient and impractical tornado kicks >Normies, being normies, completely eat this s--- up and start cheering and yelling like it's the craziest thing they've ever seen >I offer to spar him, knowing his flashy kicks will just get his ass beat >I swarm him with a three piece combo to the head and body >He kinda-sorta turtled up, but I KNOW I tagged him in all the gaps, and I KNOW he was kind of surprised, but he just sort of stumbled back and played it off like he blocked them all >The crowd goes "wow, dang, good thing he blocked them all" >WHAT? >I LITERALLY tagged him like THREE TIMES, and they THINK he "blocked" them just because he kinda-sorta turtled up? >He fakes a leg kick and transitions into that stupid 360 spinning back kick b------- and it doesn't even hurt when it lands cause it was soft as f---, but I stumble over a hitched part of the rug where it's sticking out, and I trip and fall over >The whole crowd starts going crazy and going "nah bro, just stay down, just stay down, it's over" >I'm literally one hundred percent fine, so I dust myself off and immediately stand back up to resume the spar, but everyone's already high fiving the other guy and telling me "it's over, it's over, just stay down" >I tell them I just tripped over the rug, and the normies are like "yeah, cause taekwondo guy kicked you over it", and I tried explaining to them that I stumbled over it myself but they wouldn't listen and they kept saying the taekwondo guy won >First of all, normies are so f------ stupid I can't even believe it, and are absolutely f------ clueless when it comes to fighting >If the spar had gone on for like 30 more seconds, I would have swarmed him and won and it would have been over >Second of all, you can't even "win" a spar, so w--? Why are normies so retarded, bros? Anonymous 04/08/24(Mon) 17:07:37 No. 193334 ►>>193336 >>193352 >>193369 >>194408 File: 02fcf6401a1b939a64c1fd86d(...).jpg (34 KB, 600x612) >be me >TKD f-- >Know it's dumb but keeps me in shape, plus can do cool flips n s--- >Be at party, talking to cutie 3.14 >She likes my muscles >Do some dumb flips to show off >Kick off bottle cap >Everyone is impressed >Manlet with Thai armbands walks up to me >Breathing heavily "you know that wouldn't work in a street fight, right?" >Yeah, that's not why I train, just do it for fun >Dumb smile comes across his face "wanna spar?" >Sure, why not? >Manlet spergs out, runs toward me with flailing arms and legs, screaming like superlek >Shell up because don't know what's happening >Unphased >"Heh, you know I landed every one of those shots" he's already completely gassed >He's coming back in for another autistic spazz attack >Throw spinning back kick to keep him off >He blocks but it still pushes him backward because it's a back kick >Falls on his ass >Is spazz crying on the ground >"I just tripped, I swear! TKD is lame. You're all normies!" >"Reeeeeee" >Take cutie 3.14 home >Everyone thinks I'm a hero >Mfw

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Anon made powerful enemies. | /r/Greentext

File: 6a01156e4c2c3d970c01a511b(...).png (229 KB, 320x256) Jonathon Van Buren@gmail.com Anonymous (ID: 72hLQx6c >>307975199 >>307975208 >>307978492 >>307979003 >>307979138 >>307979758 >>307980843 >>307981463 >>307981568 >>307982385 >>307984703 >>307985627 >>307986636 >>307986659 >>307986861 >>307987414 >>307987639 >>307988013 >>307988622 >>307989188 >>307989551 >>307989595 >>307989625 >>307989793 >>307989976 >>307990423 >>307992371 >>307992829 >>307994145 >>307995224 >>307998449 >>307999637 >>308001341 >>308001579 >>308002058 >>308002364 02/14/21(Sun)09:09:55 No.307968281 >>307968755 >>307970362 >>307970572 >>307973017 >>307973035 >>307973196 >>307973250 >>307973332 Legally speaking, what could happen to a person if they threw kudzu bombs on my property? >> Anonymous (ID: xc32W5B Anonymous (ID: 39h9QVq9) 02/14/21(Sun)11: e: 1607734931853.jpg (35 KB, 480x480) >>307968281 (OP) >most of my enemies are >most of my enemies are >most of my enemies are Kek >>307968281 (OP) 02/14/21(Sun)09:13:05 No.307968755 ►>>307969405 Im sure youre asking for defensive reasons anon. Its perfectly logical to assume this is going to happen to you in the near future Anonymous (ID: mwQ40K60) 02/ File: 1612743408307.jpg (32 KB, 411x306 >>307969405 >Most of my Now i'm inter are they are Anonymous (ID: 72hLQx6c) 02/14/21(Sun)09:17:17 No.307969405 >>307969746 >>307970610 >>307972816 >>307973461 >>307973863 >>307978854 >>307979177 >>307979418 >>307980082 >>307980134 >>307980237 >>307980662 >>307980988 >>307981127 >>307981172 >>307981500 >>307981529 >>307982072 >>307982238 >>307982593 >>307983003 >>307983206 >>307983253 >>307984078>>307984086 >>307984303 >>307984400 >>307984482 >>307985053 >>307986161 >>307986181 >>307986861 >>307986945 >>307987230 >>307987471 >>307987612 >>307989309 >>307989880 >>307990541 >>307990797 >>307991381 >>307991484 >>307991723 >>307992371 >>307993392 >>307994831 >>307996061 >>307996093 >>307996310 >>307996826 >>307996837 >>307996919 >>307996924 >>307997323 >>>307997727 >>307997849 >>307997930 >>307998160 >>307998166 >>307998392 >>307998776 >>307999506 >>307999976 >>308000142 >>308000491 >>308000506 >>308000914 >>308000980 >>308001134 >>308001229 >>308001579 >>308001768 >>308002146 >>308003208 >>307968755 Most of my enemies are botanists so it's a reasonable assumption that this would be in their box of tricks. Could I get them for destruction of property? Or would it be some lameass littering crime? Anonymous (ID: VCsAPAUW) File: kudzu.jpg (226 KB, 1140x641) ~~ JUI JUJĦU 02/14/21(Sun)09:24:54 No.307970610 >>307969405 >Most of my enemies are botanists >>307992829 >>308002058 Anonymous (ID: EBLZQWM4 02/14/21(Sun)09:42:08 No.307973332 File: 1612891372381.jpg (7 KB, 200x195) >>307977468 >>307979546 >>307993750 >>30800057 >>307968281 (OP) What the hell have you been getting up to in your free time, Anon? >Most of my enemies are botanists now THIS is the content I come to this godforsaken site for >>307969405 >Most of my enemies are botanists Bamboo can grow several feet in a day. ☐ Anonymous (ID: 61HmlvKb) 02/14/21(Sun)09:42:58 No.307973461 File: 1611891231567.gif (515 KB, 200x200) >>307969405 >Most of my enemies are botanists so it's a reasonable assumption that this would be in their box of tricks Holy f---, my sides. I dont know why, but that gave be the best chuckle I've had in a while. Thanks, anon. Anonymous (ID: Oloio7PQ this is why you don't pump and dump botanist chicks anon live and learn >>307969405 Anonymous (ID: 5Yk8q8LQ) 02/14/21(Sun)10:19:38 No.307978854 >Most of my enemies are botanists >>307979653 Uh, you want to be careful with those. Their deal with Botan makes them very dangerous indeed. Anonymous (ID: 67KyeT/3) 02/14/21(Sun)10:29:13 No.307980082 File: 1520887456486.png (919 KB, 1280x876) >>307969405 >my enemies are botanists 02/14/21(Sun)10:22:16 File: mwljue1r4sk11.jpg (68 KB, 1024x1024) >>307969405 >>307969405 >Most of my enemies are botanists We may have days or we may have hours, but sooner or later we all push up flowers. Anonymous (ID: tF41CNjk) th.jpg (58 KB, 355x512) >>307969405 02/14/21(Sun)10:52:13 No.307983206 >all my enemies are botanists. This may not be a bad thing. >>307969405 >>308002058 >having legitimate enemies >they all have an oddly specific field of interest What the f--- is going on in your life? >Most of my enemies are botanists What? >>307969405 >Most of my enemies are botanists Lmao Anonymous (ID: HIGXITIK >>307969405 >>307969405 02/14/21(Sun)10:24:07 No.307979418 >Most of my enemies are botanists anon... you've made a grave mistake...

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Anon marries his fumo | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/18/17(Wed)04:26:03 No.17778993 DMamIXRUMAAsw-L.jpg 615 KB JPG Have you married your fumo yet >>17779028 # >>17780569 #

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Gosling Bros... | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/17/24(Fri)09:16:07 No.676707273 ASSASSIN'S REED WAKANDA >we will never get this 812 KB JPG

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Anon makes friends | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 21 KB JPG 05/16/24(Thu)18:07:56 No.918463733 >be me >Walk into a room >Wearing apparel strictly from Vans, zumies and hollister >Headphones in blaring ska music >Sit down at table with a bunch of random people >"Breathing heavily, staring at them" >They stare back, just as one starts to talk I cut them off and say "HAVE YOU UNLOCKED SKATE HEAVEN IN TONY HAWK PRO SKATER 2?" >They either look at me in disgust or have a good conversation This is the only way I can make friends now, I'm up to 5 total frens and it seems to be working

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Was he too famous? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/16/24(Thu)22:17:03 No.199216801 images (6).jpg 8 KB JPG >the millions and millions of dollars ive made and the legions of adoring fans... it is le too much to bear... i must le unalive myself *BLAM* what did he mean by this?

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The reason why anon is a NEET. | /r/Greentext

File: aut.png (69 KB, 600x350) IMAO Proud AUTISM >I deny everything of course Why are you a NEET? Anonymous 05/15/24(Wed)19:08:30 No.77506937 >got office job out of college, though I graduated late at 24 >>77506950 >thought it would improve my SMV but it didn't and girls still never noticed me or treated me like a person >one really hot girl at the office who I liked ended up being really "friendly" with the office Chad >then one day she apparently dies in a car accident and her picture gets put up in the hallway with a box where people can leave notes for her family >still angry about her choosing Chad over me >write a really mean note to her family about how she's a slut, even saying some things that might be illegal >immediately notice the managers acting weird around me a few days after the box gets taken away >finally my boss takes me into the office and accuses me of leaving a threatening note in the box >they say they got me on camera and bring up a bunch of other irrelevant accusations about me acting weird around the girl before but it's obvious they have no way of conclusively proving which note was mine out of all of them >they suspend me while they "investigate" and then try to fire me a few days later for some other b------- I didn't even do >I sue the company for wrongful termination, retaliation, and autism discrimination (I really do have autism) >it ends up taking over a year with litigation while living with my parents but I eventually end up losing the case even though they still couldn't actually prove it was me who left the note >I think the female judge just had it out for me Anyway, that's why I'm a NEET now two years after that ordeal. The workplace is rough if you're a bottom 80% guy with autism so I never even tried getting another job. Why are you a NEET?

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The reach of the century | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/16/24(Thu)16:28:48 No.676639432 64 KB JPG >be slave >only job is carrying weapons for other men >j--- dress you as samurai because they think it's funny >end up in a battle >immediately surrender >get enslaved again >300 years later >THE LEGENDARY BLACK SAMURAI

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What pussy does to a mf | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/16/24(Thu)22:34:57 No.199217249 NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC FREE SOLO free solo.png 587 KB PNG >climbs for years without injuries >gets a whiff of p---- >immediately falls off a wall what did they mean by this?

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Anon is about to give himself a root canal filling | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/23/19(Sun)07:07:59 No.802961509 20190623_080514.jpg 1.53 MB JPG I'm about to give myself a root canal/filling. I have no dental training. But the pain is more than I can bare. Ask me anything. I'm scared guys.

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Anon hates video essayists | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/15/24(Wed)18:17:15 No.67653431 White man has been here. How can you tell? DEFENSE DRAMA RABBIT HOLE 49.35 In Defense of Nicolas Cage In Praise of Shadows VIDEO ESSAY Yo Mama: Drama Rabbit Hole ft. @Yo Mama DaftPina SHOCKING The Shockingly WEIRD >120 minutes long video review Way Codename: Kids Next Door Ended >80% of the vid is just a plot summary

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Greentext Stories - How much more deplorable can Anon be? | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous they say that my mailuketes make is boring, then have to show them masenem itpihyve never seen belum 1.34 MB PNG 02/28/24(Wed)01:00:36 No.76603561 >be me, 13 years old >imagine yourself being able to freeze the time in order to rob candies at grocery store >ffw, in college >imagine yourself being able to freeze the time in order to grope girl's breasts and r--- them whats wrong with me? 6 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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