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Anonymous 39 KB JPG 2 Replies 1 Image Anonymous 123 KB PNG 05/29/24(Wed)16:05:57 No.77656460 >listening to JOI video >"I want you to firmly grasp it" View Thread 05/29/24(Wed)16:12:11 No.77656487 >listening to JOI video >they don't do a countdown

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Anonymous 152 KB PNG 04/26/25(Sat)18:05:01 No.80995962 >Be me, unemployed >Looking for a new job >Find an opening at the local zoo >Get to interview >They tell me my job is to dress up as a chimp and pretend to be a chimp in the chimp enclosure, as they don't have any chimps at the moment. >"No thanks, I don't want to do suck humiliating work" >They offer me $400 a day >"Ok I'll take the job" >But there is a catch, the moment I break character, I get fired. >Seems simple enough >Swing around on the bars >Eat banana >Throw s--- at the glass >FFW to swinging >Swing way too f------ hard >So hard that the bar snaps and I fly over the wall into the Lion enclosure >OhShit.jpeg >Literally s------- my chimp suit >Start screaming for help >Running around >Life flashed before my eyes as the lion backs me into the corner >He says "Shut the f--- up or we'll both get fired"

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

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Its called autism anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Narushio @Narushioww 05/29/24(Wed)11:00:53 No.677955573 Scar design was changed due to CN backlash (Please speak about this issue, as on the GL side, CN's complaints are "NOT" GL's problems) I hope the Wuthering Waves Gobal Teams understand and give different patch for GL and for CN #wutheringwaves #wuwa # #Rovers 90 KB JPG >genshin censors female character designs >"just go watch p--- incel" >"haha incel angry" >"incels are sooo mad that the women look realistic" >"there doesn't need to be a different global and cn version chud" >kurogames censors wuthering waves twink >"Noooo you can't censor my heckin husbandoeeeee" >"noooo dont listen to incels nooo" >"I can't stand this anymore wahhhh" >"please release a different version for global and cn pleaseeeee" How do these people function?

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Anon is a vampire | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 47 KB JPG 07/02/22(Sat) 14:25:11 No.67425733 >spiders and spider webs on the home gym weights again should i just get a gym membership? Anonymous >>67428128 # 07/02/22(Sat) 14:26:34 No.67425751 Anonymous 43 KB JPG 07/02/22(Sat)14:32:52 No.67425828 >creak open the door to my home gym >cobwebs on the weights >bats flying around >organ music blasting on my speakers yup... it's lifting time >>67426657 # >>67427373 # >>67430065 # >>67430397 #

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Anon hates his life | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >wake up >turn on PC >brush my teeth >make a coffee >load up genshin >do genshin dailies 12/18/23(Mon)04:57:14 No.458312961 >do blue archive dailies >do princess connect dailies >do star rail dailies >do grubble dailies >take a break with apex legends dailies >do reverse 1999 dailies >do neural cloud dailies >do girls frontline dailies >do arknights dailies >do more stuff in grubble >make another coffee >have a light lunch >play classic wow for 8 hours >do more stuff in genshin >do stuff in star rail >eat dinner >masturbate >go to bed I hate my life.

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Why are you looking at me | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/28/24(Tue)13:04:35 No.677865125 85 KB JPG >Patient presents with $300 million development budget and 8 years of dev time. >Give me a Differential Diagnosis for flop.

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Virgin God Anon and his Gatekeeping of Sex | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 324 KB JPG 05/29/24(Wed)08:56:54 No.38016587 >NOOOOO THATS THE WRONG HOLE. YOU ARE GOING TO HELL FOR ALL OF ETERNITY.

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Stand Together | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/26/24(Sun)22:06:43 No.77624005 nightcrawler-1200-1200-675-675-crop-000000.jpg 81 KB JPG >at school >new teacher comes in >shes fat, old, negative cantal tilt, ugly, invisible jaw, ogre nose, bowl haircut >classmates are rude to her, make fun of her, fight with her, scream constantly, had to leave after a month >few months later >another new teacher comes in >she has straight blue eyes and eyebrows, symmetrical face, nice jaw and chin, hollow cheeks, pretty nose, just a well structured face, >classmates want to "BFF" with her, call her bestie, are quiet, nice to her, obey huh... weird....

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worse than the axe tbh | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/28/24(Tue)12:15:26 No.122111343 Say, do you like Imagine Dragons? >Imagine draggin deez nuts across your face 343 KB JPG View Thread

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Anon was the backup option | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 59 KB JPG >be me 04/20/24(Sat) 18:29:00 No.77202599 >hangs out with this girl for a bit >we become extremely close friends >everytime we talk and hang out we get closer >we start saying "I love you" and "I love you too" to eachother >she then tells me if we can be in a relationship >at the time i was unsure >last time we hanged out (about a week ago) we got really touchy and physical >we start messaging eachother about kissing eachother >we start calling eachother babe and baby >I then feel confident in telling her that we should date >me: "Hey, should we start dating?" >her: "HUH?!?!?!?!?!" >(mind you this is after a long session of flirty text to eachother, most of them was her saying how much she loves me and how much she wants to kiss me and stuff, with no irony at all) w-- bros

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Anon is a salty nerd | /r/Greentext

A A 355 KB JPG ANGUNA >be me in middle school >Playing minish cap on my android tablet >During apple vs Android debate I bring up the fact that you can sideload and emulate on Android >Get called a f------ nerd by everyone >Be me today >Scrolling socials >"New emulator hits apple app store" >1000s of apple fans jerking it off >Literally have had all of these emulators on the play store downloaded since the day I got my pixel 3 >White women freaking out about how they can play Pokemon on their phone The whole "android did it first" thing is so real and Apple consumers are actual NPCs for this s--- Anonymous >>917141684 (OP) # Lol nerd 04/19/24(Fri)13:32:02 No.917141704

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Anon doesn't have his license | /r/Greentext

1h (05/28/24 15:40) · 77652265-7 Re⚫ 1 Img JPG 42KB (480x360) hqdefault (5).jpg 2 Replies EAR >yeah bro, just climb into a 400 pound steel casket that's moving at high speeds everyday and hope you never get killed from all the other, generally unpredicitable 400 pound steel caskets that are moving at the same, if not higher speeds. >Pray you never make a slipup while moving at 50 miles an hour surrounded by 400 pound steel caskets, or any of the rest of them do I know I'm a NEET and all, but what the f---?

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What Deep Voice Thick Accent Youtuber Read This? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/224.249001594) 262649 (KU 2941224) Any 198 TVR 4 000 wym Anonymous 24949024546 Anonymous 02/2249024301400249506470 :: 24909642) >>249SULATE 56242910442 Was the most curse way tho you've verden 2001 shipped Knuckles and Houge, but the less grow and grew on every woman looked at looked like Houge, and I would magn her bong with Knuckies. I recorded myself replaying Senic novomures 2 and legaly downloaded Sonic A and went back through the recordings and found at the scenes where Knucides and Houge have "moments".comped these all into a cd and labeled it as "proof", would spend hours every day looking at the same fan drown art that shipped Knuckles and Hougo and my obsession grow more and more e watched cory scone of the anime where it was hinted they liked each other and rewatched them. I would look up rule 34 of rouge and every ingle one with Sonic or Grade I would protend didn't cost got into a tight with someone on the intemet about whether Houpe ted bhadow more or Knuckles and everybody in the thread said Shadow amos aled myse Leucang school pretending to be sick was addrt go for 2 weke coud the acides en ro.g: and read very action and wow cry tanan. My parents discovered my cabys atnes er knackes and cupe when won to the bathroom ith: erty net te com and treatened to seek the computer. throw my mem and closed myselnom hitting team my bat curg to my computer and screamed and they called the police where was taken away and hospodomon hswert or try month, and stopped going to school the last 2 weeks of these stated to pet rear bod curing the last months, had to retall my stat c) can Jonary because coudt take the st. was mee om te atera honor societate Anonymous 240 24 A 140 13 53 N (1967) esfasana 200 MOWERE 1714401 31 21 1: 240 37767 (639R 16x) And the Easte sly immig ANT-C Anonymous 2014122422 N So you hot gin. Anonymous 12/14512:37:42 No.248606438 = = =249190625 ucing nice blog, co Next time save your parents more year or scherno and bed your set, stud comp 037144191101 N 240538733783 dud the Fack Anonymous 27|14|58122:06:20 7022 C. as act Anonymous 02142925N: 24942 WARZ.c out to sect, but after tasted reading your pet mat HERMENANY szems pretty nom:l 013717° 4(5×1)21 37 27 N: 240000405673067/7657753100405233678700406167-17004777777 hyuckyo, acerybody at moments this once in awe. This we can here what negatne wythnos we've over done. Lklad 'm no longer this. PERMAR No aron, your slike that. Your clangmobomowano for something to gper your autom Anonymous 24 No.24924 Offwylizały law maneta la inde was in waddle C The Lak R Anonymous 30. 10.00 by kabilan 1251965) Youxi way E yo 11 are ve MOGI Anonymous W211 24 004565 Play videos hy weet te gepatic f The only vang you child was Lukiny sanctwy think we "www.yarn" (and warm you lay pink, weil man canly think that sentim niem ty of progine du nie) is listenen gut. =w= f------ unsand bum the sand varial send und prgin the you, that the just a regula thing tu cu imire your lowly new you achi BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! Anonym 1 7 15 19 146705756807304567277561 Ongleseything that speed flexx hd momTrifasining xalt the max The ly women all my dry icon focking game PUCCA OF YOU "gn you A KVC T GET-A-LOAD OF THIS OF CAM Rouge loves Knuckles and you ALL KNOW IT you ALL KNOW IT COMMENCING ROUTINE: SLAP YOUR S--- AND THEN OP WAS A F-- ALL ALONG... Anonymous 05/21/1461;22:18:36 No 24904000* = 10248511204112490/1479002425/1501 <=249072237 >>>2435/24151024917262" >0-2485/2/36 ==12490/2796 0024867204200/2490/2029 10:248614067 +12490(4734 302486/9274:924917709 BERANDA (10) half, and passing duality wing though head i At daward spanley dywyll My My heal at the bride wide and hemmetinleriy ying yet me bal Myly did you by my dear and kenckard milyardly kindly Tyylilaththey thing with the they willing ywy My my, day thingy wi tay thay dying Tuying they w hot day and my mind kingmi and They the fix my flirtyTyson, and freed them of hacked by jmci umiddle shping by the nigh 6001173 33 43 1 1971 M 3751 y You are discuting acc or sine and your part care about you for more than you done onusty consider acid, and lezi anazing for not dong to 351N A05214 10000 R 65 locked the door at cay and my mom sa c----, accing on and trying to kowth me, recounting memones from childhood so I would open the door, the sept sing by the car thal ng My cec, that gives me hobee deal your tucang set, you are an outract: campal something like the A140 Up to the thread was umy what the el, mar Anonymous 22.29(13)= MAALSUN 1222 as sch Tiki yox and padel tin Yucking for the H Anonym FC 1 73 72 77 7 KR 676761 www. Anonymous 02/14/1312):24:10 0.245/2/79= فند عالم ال مقلاة الالام الاحتمال 30049171 you so much HOW HORSE YONG Worst part is that you say it's par to typo so you know you are won Just accept their ofter and co to therapy, you ne "They 'trust me'. Dumbfucks...' -Dr. Shuhei Yoshida PhD. Esq. XXVIIIIII, Discoverer of Autism

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Anon doesn't understand American humor | /r/Greentext

File: Nikola Tesla.jpg (453 KB, 940x1260) ☐ Anonymous 05/28/24(Tue)23:55:40 No.77652406 ► >Be me, immigrant to the US > Dream of changing the world with electricity > Kind of an ass, but a lot of people think I'm smart > Work for up and coming company > Make a deal for my pay > Accept nothing at first, but if my inventions work get big payout > Get to work > Years pass > Inventions work, company gets crazy rich > Go to collect my pay > Get told to f--- off > Issue goes to court > Court throws out contact > Everyone laughs at me > Be elon musk, pic unrel > Still not been paid

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Greentext Stories - Anon was disappointed | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 39 KB JPG 2 Replies 1 Image Anonymous 123 KB PNG 05/29/24(Wed)16:05:57 No.77656460 >listening to JOI video >"I want you to firmly grasp it" View Thread 05/29/24(Wed)16:12:11 No.77656487 >listening to JOI video >they don't do a countdown

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