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Anonymous 76 KB JPG 06/21/24(Fri)17:46:16 No.77910600 >go to unemployment office to try and force an appointment with the boy i like there >literally only doing it because i like him >i have the most uncomfortable appointment with an old woman instead >end it quickly and try to leave >get clubbed in the head as I walk out the door >see the boy I like, an elderly Chinese man, wielding a Mauser >forces me at gunpoint to play MAHJONG or I'll be banished to the land of the Yi (our term for employed) forever. : Anonymous home along on a friday night? juts remember this mahjon 06/21/24(Fri)17:52:49 No.77910651 I would win at mahjong 80 KB JPG

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon is a cat | /r/Greentext

: a Cat 06/21/24(Fri)19:47:04 No. 77911657 Be a cat 104 KB JPG >owner picks me up >be me >tiny kitten >fluffy as heck >everything is a toy >decide to explore >see weird thing on the floor >bat at it with paw >it's a shoelace >mfw endless entertainment >maximum comfy mode activated >purr like a tiny motorboat >life is good : Anonymous >>77911657 (OP) # >get neutered 06/21/24(Fri)19:51:37 No.77911692 >dont have to worry about Chad cats anymore must be heaven

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Anon got screwed over | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/24(Mon)19:10:35 No.267837047 obito-itachi-nagato-v0-7axcieoe4bkb1.jpg 44 KB JPG >Naruto promised Nagato that he'll "bring peace to the Rain Village" >fast forward to the Boruto era, Rain Village is still a massive s------- while Nagato is forever trapped in genjutsu hell inside Itachi's gourd after he got Talk No Jutsu'd by Naruto Pretty funny when you think about it.

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Anon is the uberman (he has a skill issue) | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_3636.jpg (514 KB, 1200x1628) Anonymous 06/20/24(Thu)19:54:18 No.23509664 >>23510246 >be me >read Kant and realized reality is a human construct >read Nietzsche and realized morality doesn't exist >read the sutta pitaka and saw the emptiness of all phenomena >cultivated isolation from the masses to develop my free spirit >meditated until I no longer cared whether anything exists or not >stopped counting on my nofap streak >still feel bad when my team mates get angry at me in halo Now what?

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Anon and some blue stuff | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Am I secreting blue stuff? 2.67 MB JPG 06/21/24(Fri)15:27:46 No.31484656 >Read an online story >Have my penguin plushie in front of the phone, pretending that he is reading the story with me >Take a break from the story and look at him >Remember that blue stuff has also been on some white t-shirts I have worned Literally don't know what this blue stuff. I remember seeing on my white t-shirts when I woke up from sleeping on the couch. Is there something wrong with my hand? Is there a natural reason for this? Does it have with to do with sleeping on the couch? Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)15:30:56 No.31484673 >>31484656 (OP) # Clean your room and you'll find out where it's coming from. Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)15:30:59 No.31484674 >>31484656 (OP) # Probably ink or something. You are also weird as f---. >>31484680 # Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)15:32:33 No.31484680 >>31484674 # I haven't use any ink pens in years.

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An opening appears | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)21:34:16 No.20033811 隊 tv.jpg 1.02 MB JPG >Hey virgin. Your parents have paid me to f--- you. How would /tv/ react to this situation?

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Claim The Skies | /r/Greentext

: goonano Homework 05/27/24(Mon)02:09:20 No.77625956 image_2024-05-26_130324421.png 10 KB PNG >family out of town for a few weeks >on workman's comp for injury >get super bored and watch p--- >ffw its been 4 days since they have left and ive done nothing but goon and stay edged >unironically starting to worship p--- >walk around house naked leaking pre everywhere and stroking mindlessly while looking at p--- on my phone whenever im not in my room looking at p--- on my pc >mind genuinely starting to get hazy >want to c-- so bad but i dont bc it feels so good to edge >no coming back now how has your week been?

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Should have used a VPN | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/30/24(Thu)11:41:54 No.10976238 LUT what-did-he-do-to-piss-them-off-v0-95vjovhiq26c1.jpg 55 KB JPG >be me >downloaded some sega saturn roms yesterday >there's a cop van staking out my house today i'm done for arent i

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Anon just watched Death Note | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 13 KB PNG 09/26/16(Mon)12:08:04 No.31679831 >be autist >have nothing to do >decide to cast a magic spell because you gotta try every so often in case you DO have those secret anime powers >read 7 is magic number >make text document called 7777777777777777 777777 777777777.txt 77777777 >write a bunch of names while chanting b------- >next day neighbor is found dead AMA

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Anon Hates Breaking Bad | /r/Greentext

File: 1687763988027766.jpg (30 KB, 871x653) ☐ Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)11:03:00 No.200313186 >>200313214 >>200313277 >>200314182 >>200314707 >>>200315017 >>200315275 >>200315353 >>200315384 >>200316351 >>200316558 >>200316759 >>200317214 >>200317934 >>200318748 >>200318931 >>200319781 >>200321189 >>200323305 >>200323400 >>200323411 >NOOOOO YOU CAN RUIN TENS OF THOUSANDS OF LIVES WITH HORRIBLY ADDICTIVE DRUGS BUT YOU CAN'T SHOOT THE HECKIN KIDDERINO ON THE DIRTBIKERINO ☐ Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)11:03:58 No.200313214 ►>>200315706 >>200313186 (OP). >Jesse is le moral because he FEELS bad for his atrocities >> Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)11:39:47 No.200314182 ► File: Frieren.jpg (63 KB, 736x736) >>200313186 (OP) >Season 3: Walt saves Jesses life while Mike and Gus try to kill him >Season 4: Jesse becomes besties with Mike and Gus while wanting Walt dead >> Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:20:26 No.200316817 File: sad face.gif (1.79 MB, 275x275) >>200317004 >I am le sad and le tired of it all Stellar performance. ☐ Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:37:56 No.200317214 ►>>200317277 >>200317319 >>200317869 >>200318762 >>200313186 (OP) Breaking Bad was always a goofy live action cartoon for adults. >two face gus >i am le one who knocks >bbbb-bonfire >machine gun in trunk killing nazis >magnets bitch >any scene with le 4d chessmaster gus >it's not le meth >the two assassin brothers

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Lol first time seeing an actually funny joke on /tv/ in quite a while | /r/Greentext

4 @DiscussingFilm Netflix will begin selling their own popcorn for $4.49 per bag. POPCORN INDIANA POPCORN INDIANA. NETFLIX NETFLIX Now Popping CULT CLASSIC CHEDDAR KETTLE Now Popping SWOONWORTHY CINNAMON KETTLE wh • 2:37 PM Jun 20, 2024 5.9M Views 611 1.4K FAMILY SIZE! 6.3K FAMILY SIZE! 618 KINO IS BACK ON THE MENU BOYS Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:05:31 No.200321943 ►>>200321974 >>200321978>>200321981 >>200321982 >>2003 LITERALLY Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)13:06:58 No.200321974 >>200321943 (OP) >buy the white cheddar >open it up >it's black >>200321992 >>200322050 >>200322111 >>200322435 >>200322696 >>200322828 >>200323137

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A lot can change in 25 years | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/08/24(Sat) 15:49:59 No. 199908836 183626010.jpg 104 KB JPG >watch televised concert from 25 years ago >everybody is skinny and happy What changed?

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No fun Down Under | /r/Greentext

AL I made a mistake coming to Australia I made a mistake coming to Aus(...) 12 KB JPG >wages are low 06/16/24(Sun)09:24:19 No.471288099 This is not what I expected... >food is blant >lack of culture outside of melbourne >everyone is rude >everyone drinks alcohol >it's too expensive >houses are boring >nightclubs are boring >woman are trash and very self centered >no place for my religion >nothing to do here >tourist destinations are crap >no one makes the effort to learn my culture don't come here, i regret every second of it

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Greentext Stories - Anon actually gets harassed | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous 76 KB JPG 06/21/24(Fri)17:46:16 No.77910600 >go to unemployment office to try and force an appointment with the boy i like there >literally only doing it because i like him >i have the most uncomfortable appointment with an old woman instead >end it quickly and try to leave >get clubbed in the head as I walk out the door >see the boy I like, an elderly Chinese man, wielding a Mauser >forces me at gunpoint to play MAHJONG or I'll be banished to the land of the Yi (our term for employed) forever. : Anonymous home along on a friday night? juts remember this mahjon 06/21/24(Fri)17:52:49 No.77910651 I would win at mahjong 80 KB JPG

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