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File: imagmes.jpg (6 KB, 197x256) Guys I need family advice Anonymous 12/16/24(Mon)17:21:23 No.79771702 ► >be me >have a kid >wanted to name him Marcus, but wife didnt like it >we went with her suggestion instead >whatever.jpg >work a lot, dont really get to spend much time with him >years pass, hes now 16 >chilling at home one evening, drinking beer with a buddy >kid walks in and asks if he can go to the movies with his friend >Sure, buddy. >he says Thanks Dad and leaves >friend looks at me and says, Man, your sons grown up. >Yeah, he really is, I nod like a proud dad >then he asks, Whats his name, by the way? uhhhhh.png >no idea >laugh it off like hes joking and keep drinking >next morning, hungover >son hands me a school form to fill in go through it, pretty straightforward... until I hit Student Name suddenly_sweating.gif >staring at the blank spot like its a bomb defusal >son asks if Im feeling okay panic.exe >tell him Im feeling sick and need to lie down >pass him the form and say, You can just fill in the rest, champ. >crisis averted >later that evening >realize I still dont know his name and decide to ask my wife subtly >Hey. >Hey? she replies >So... uh, you know, our kid? I start carefully >Which one? she laughs brain_crash.jpg >forgot we have more than one >I wasnt prepare for multiple choice questions when I came into the bedroom >start sweating again >play it cool, mumble something about needing water, and head downstairs >son is there ohno.mp4 >he says hi >Hey, chap! I reply enthusiastically, dodging like the Counter strike 1.6 veteran I am >he pauses and asks why I always call him buddy instead of his name >uhm >mutter something about needing the bathroom and bolt upstairs >lock myself in the toilet all night >next morning, go straight to work without saying a word guys, help how do I casually find out my sons name without him or my wife realizing I forgot?

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File size: 215 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Know Your Rights | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: 6GOWbJKI ) 12/16/24(Mon)08:48:59 No.491556475 780 KB PNG >See emerging far right political party >Look inside manifesto >Center right politics

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Anon aspires to become an author | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/13/23(Wed)00:06:50 No.22823139 >want to make a journal >buy journal >open journal >stare at it for 10 minutes before giving up 40 KB JPG what the f--- are you supposed to write? how your day went? thats something a girl in middle school does

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Because MFs think they can fix psychos | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Anchovy Pizza 12/16/24(Mon)16:26:30 No.79769671 @Anchovy_Pizza - 9h H-hello you can s-sit wherever haha Sorry y-you had to wait, I n-needed to clean up a bit haha 50 17180 3.2K ill 33K image_2024-12-16_032608554.png 755 KB PNG >men love loser women but women hate loser men how come it's so easy to be a woman? You literally just can't lose. 2 Replies 1 Image View Thread

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 200 KB PNG 10/08/21(Fri)14:28:43 No.864617163 >be 16yo troll >lost a lot of friendships because of my troll nature >2 years ago, Fortnite became really popular >get a troll idea >make a flyer with an invitation to a fortnite tournament with prize money >It is easy, just click on this link! >the link actually leads to b--------- p--- >i give the flyers to 12 year olds Pic related

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Miserable Anon! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous who's the biggest loser on /r9(...) CONSUMMATUR >21 01/25/23(Wed)09:01:17 No.71962299 676 KB PNG >still live with family >still stuck in same s--- town I've always lived in >zero friends, girlfriend ever >college dropout (couldn't choose what to major in) >slave tier job at a warehouse >only 7k saved >zero talents, qualifications, interests, skills, or idea what to do >ugly as f--- It's so f------ over. I've gone on tiktok and see people younger than me with 6 figure jobs and insane physiques. I've literally ruined my entire life and wasted my youth without ever getting to have one. I feel hopeless and suicidal. I bought a shotgun last year and I think about using it all the time.

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Anon loves girls addicted to heroine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/14/24(Sat)20:48:35 No.124797739 >tfw no Nico gf How do I get a gf who acts like Nico? 137 KB JPG Anonymous 12/14/24(Sat)20:51:04 No.124797776 Why do you want a girl who's a heroin addict? >>124800001 #

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Cognitive Dissonance Anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 93 KB PNG student 11/16/23(Thu)09:15:42 No.75435963 >be me, first year engineering student >forced to take an Engineering Ethics class >drilled into us that a lot of what we learn can be used to cause harm and we need to be careful >be me, second year engineering >forced to take another Engineering Ethics course >drilled into us that we have an obligation to society to use our skills for betterment >be me, third year engineering student >learn that Lockheed Martin sponsors my school's engineering program >get offered a six figure job building missile targeting systems at LM >my counselors and professors push me to take the job it's so over for this race

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Anons on Gen X | /r/Greentext

File: genx reddit.jpg (49 KB, 854x545) r/GenX u/Xix_Feng • 13h Am I taking crazy pills?! Existential Crisis Join 5 years ago everything was fine - today my parents support Qanon and my kids support Hamas. W--?! I'm going to go binge some Star Trek next generation or something... + 1,883 1,153 Comments 444 Anonymous (ID: ifo/0TGL 12/15/24(Sun)17:51:34 No.491523804 >>491523882 >>491523884 >>491523974 >>491524097 >>491524173 >>491524234 >>491524353 >>491524595 >>491524621 >>491524796 >>491525257 >>491526626 >>491526776 >>491529032 >>491529592 >>491530324 Has the whole world gone mad?! Anonymous (ID: DW6f76Fn) >>491523804 (OP) >BING BING WAHOO! 12/15/24(Sun)17:52:50 No.491523882 >>491529032 >> Anonymous (ID: +Lxnn4Dv >> 12/15/24(Sun)17:53:57 No.491523956 >i will consume more media instead of doing something Anonymous (ID: 16j7gluZ >>491525756 12/15/24(Sun)17:54:08 No.491523974 >>491524532 >>491523804 (OP) >things are going wrong and someone needs to step up? >not me, I'm gonna go be apathetic and consoom 1980s/1990s media Gen X is always so f------ gay and predictable. They want to be in charge but they never want to actually lead the charge. >> Anonymous (ID: jfPpNqqO) 12/15/24(Sun)17:54:21 No.491523988 >My kids are antisemitic. >My parents are talking about cannibal elites. >I just wanna grill!

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Anon destroyed the Spotify | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/15/24(Sun)22:53:37 No.124811184 >the only version of your favorite album available is a brickwalled remaster from the mid '00s Spotify bitrate tops out at 160kbps unless you 53 KB JPG pay a monthly subscription >albums disappear from library without warning Why would anybody with ears use this s--- service? It's not hard to manage your own files and disk space is dirt cheap now.

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How the Grinch ruined Christmas | /r/Greentext

File: aayb92b1pd5e1.jpg (44 KB, 757x800) Anonymous 12/15/24(Sun)14:59:00 No.928685144 >>928689178 How I ruined Christmas >Be me >2023 >Taking my niece grocery shopping at Wal-mart >She's looking in the Jewelry section >sees a necklace she liked >Go back later and buy it and store it for Christmas >During the year, I build a new computer >Keep the boxes >Keep the necklace in the box >Wrap it >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >Don't even just use boxes for parts, just any shipping container I can find >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >put it in a larger box, wrap it. >I get about 7 layers, put it all in the box for the case >Wrap it >Biggest gift at Christmas >A nesting doll of presents >It takes her 20 minutes of frustration to open it up >Gets p----- at me >Everyone gets p----- at me >nobody is laughing at the end >Get told I took it too far >FFW today >In family group chat >No more pranks with gifting >Litterally-1984.jpg >MFW, I got joke gift boxes from Amazon for everyone's gifts. Anonymous 12/15/24(Sun)17:09:09 No.928689178 ► File: hqdefault(4).jpg (24 KB, 480x360) >>928685144 (OP) They can cry about it if it's a necklace at the end. That's hilarious and endearing. Good luck. HEHEUHEHAHEAHUEH imgflip.com Anonymous 12/15/24(Sun)17:11:09 No.928689241 Kek

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People use anything to justify themselves | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/13/23(Sat) 11:48:21 No.73299310 "It don't matter. None of this matters." Carl Brutananadilewski fY_zegwlSNH765-X01nB9otgegs FGGxxilqQjaupRTw.jpg 655 KB JPG >every single major Religion, Philosophy, Faith, and Way of Life says your race/ethnicity doesn't matter AT ALL. In this life or the afterlife >people still want to construct racial beliefs using "science" and vague religious passages to enforce "the differences between the races" and their superiority over them

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Anon is oblivious | /r/Greentext

Anonymous www 49 KB JPG 12/15/24(Sun)15:44:52 No.79766181 >talking to a female classmate that I got acquainted with over the semester >she said she needed help with studying and homework >told her there's a pretty good tutor for the class and I went to them a couple of times for help >she said that maybe I should help her since I've gone to the tutor already >said that the tutor would probably help more because they're more familiar with the topic than I am >drops the subject and doesn't really seem as friendly from that point onward Did I offend her in some way?

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Greentext Stories - Anon has children | /r/Greentext

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File: imagmes.jpg (6 KB, 197x256) Guys I need family advice Anonymous 12/16/24(Mon)17:21:23 No.79771702 ► >be me >have a kid >wanted to name him Marcus, but wife didnt like it >we went with her suggestion instead >whatever.jpg >work a lot, dont really get to spend much time with him >years pass, hes now 16 >chilling at home one evening, drinking beer with a buddy >kid walks in and asks if he can go to the movies with his friend >Sure, buddy. >he says Thanks Dad and leaves >friend looks at me and says, Man, your sons grown up. >Yeah, he really is, I nod like a proud dad >then he asks, Whats his name, by the way? uhhhhh.png >no idea >laugh it off like hes joking and keep drinking >next morning, hungover >son hands me a school form to fill in go through it, pretty straightforward... until I hit Student Name suddenly_sweating.gif >staring at the blank spot like its a bomb defusal >son asks if Im feeling okay panic.exe >tell him Im feeling sick and need to lie down >pass him the form and say, You can just fill in the rest, champ. >crisis averted >later that evening >realize I still dont know his name and decide to ask my wife subtly >Hey. >Hey? she replies >So... uh, you know, our kid? I start carefully >Which one? she laughs brain_crash.jpg >forgot we have more than one >I wasnt prepare for multiple choice questions when I came into the bedroom >start sweating again >play it cool, mumble something about needing water, and head downstairs >son is there ohno.mp4 >he says hi >Hey, chap! I reply enthusiastically, dodging like the Counter strike 1.6 veteran I am >he pauses and asks why I always call him buddy instead of his name >uhm >mutter something about needing the bathroom and bolt upstairs >lock myself in the toilet all night >next morning, go straight to work without saying a word guys, help how do I casually find out my sons name without him or my wife realizing I forgot?

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