Desmond 'Etika' Amofah, Beloved Gaming YouTuber, Found Dead at 29

Desmond Amofah, best known online by his handle Etika, was found dead yesterday evening in New York City's East River at the age of 29 from an apparent suicide.

It is the worst possible ending to a saga that began in October of last year, when Amofah posted the distressing message to his subreddit, "And now, it's my turn to die. I love you all." Naturally, the post alarmed his fans, as Etika appeared to be in the midst of a mental breakdown, having sabotaged his YouTube and Twitter presences and sending posts as though his life was about to end. Three days later, he returned to his subreddit to say he was fine, attempting to play off the incident as sort of ARG. In the coming months, Etika's situation continued to decline.

In April of 2019, Amofah tweeted that he was going to shoot himself in the head. Two weeks later, he live-streamed police raiding his house and arresting him out of concern for his safety. Shortly after, he called himself the "Antichrist" in an interview with Keemstar and was filmed assaulting a police officer the following day. Last week, he posted his final goodbye.

The eight-minute video, titled simply "I'm sorry," shows Amofah walking around New York City while discussing his life as if it were about to end. He delivered several personal apologies, expressed remorse that he "fucked up his entire life" and spoke about the things he would not experience, all with a chilling calmness. "There will be games, movies, technology I'll never see," he said. "I'll never see Attack on Titan." Three days later, his personal belongings were found on the Manhattan Bridge, including his Nintendo Switch.

There's a perverse, heartbreaking poignancy in Amofah speaking of Attack on Titan and bringing his Nintendo Switch to the spot of his apparent suicide. To the world at large, Amofah was "Etika," an excitable streamer with a deep passion for Nintendo products, anime and his community of fans known as the Joycon Boyz. For many, the earnestness of Etika's love was the most endearing and attractive feature of his streams. He screamed during E3s at the latest Nintendo news and reacted with unbridled joy to the bizarre content the internet had to offer every day. He was a nerd whose enthusiasm was infectious, bringing joy to the thousands who watched his streams regularly. That passion stuck with him to his end.

Social media is currently flooded with tributes to Etika, with fans sharing clips of his favorite moments or silly memes which he would have definitely enjoyed.

As with all suicides, this did not have to happen. It's a tragedy to lose anyone to their own hand, and in Etika's case, it was clear that through the circus of his mental health saga, there were still thousands of fans who wanted nothing less than to see Etika safe and healthy. That Desmond Amofah didn't understand that is a cruel reminder of the pain mental illness can inflict.

If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:

In the US:

Crisis Text Line: Text START to 741741 from anywhere in the USA, at any time, about any type of crisis | http://www.crisistextline.org/

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 | http://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 | http://www.thetrevorproject.org/

Outside the US:

The International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

Befrienders Worldwide: https://www.befrienders.org/need-to-talk