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I have no users above me ;_;

Kill him

Throw a used copy of Payday on his stupid sleeping face.

Call the ambulance.

sell him overseas so he stops making creepy threads

Probably rearrange the furniture so they wake up and freak out.

have my spiders turn him into a servant because why not?

Avoid it.

"Oh good! We've been needing new, ahem, donations at the cloning labs."

I'll just put you back in a nice cold river.

cuddle… maybe have a few nibbles here and there~

Try to sneak away without awakening the spider hordes

Silently burns his stash of 2011 memes

Loudly burns everything down

Unsure, how'd this even happen?

Finish the job.

Put him in a wagon on the top of a hill.
Then push the wagon.

Tells him to wake up and tells the internet about it.

shoves a revive seed down his/her's throat

throw a pokeball, capture, then put in a box to forget about because I'm a ghost/dark/psychic/fire trainer

Too scared of spider appendages to really do anything. Prod with a stick to make sure they won't jump at me, then go home.

Gives him a nightmare about spiders

Grabs the lube and portable generator

Ship in a box to another country

1. Bag
2. Ultra Ball
3. Cross fingers
4. Hopefully catch Lucario.

cocoon him and wait for him to wake up to watch his freakout

Put in a wagon. Fill said wagon with dynamite as well.
Push wagon into my cousin's house.
Detonate dynamite.

Hastily lights an unaccounted stick of dynamite in his satchel as he walks away

Put you in a rowboat and push it off into the Atlantic

I was hoping Sam would be above me, but you'll have to do.

Run over his rowbot with my battleship.

Crossdress him while he's unconscious and hide nearby till he wakes up.

This

Do the most mature thing i can think of, draw male genitalia on your face.

Hmmm… He didn't last long… JOSEPH! GET THE SALTS!

Hold him hostage until people stop making shitty user above you threads.

Incept in his mind the idea to make the shittiest user above you thread to date.

Hack into his kym wiki and regender him as a trans female

tilt EVERYTHING in his house to be at a slight angle and hex them so that he can never correct it

Slowly remove every one of her legs, then place them randomly around the area.

Do the most evil thing I can imagine. STEAL HIS MAIL! MYAHAHAHA!

Take his wallet, mobile phone, shoes and everything valuable. Throw the body to the nearest trash can.

lock them up in a box so that Nima is all mine

Leave her there. I wouldn't want myself to be bothered either when I sleep.

Put in a wagon.
Push wagon into an abandoned pizzeria.
Film his reaction when I play the FNaF Jumpscare noise.

Take his pizza and laugh:

Steal the pizza rolls for myself even if I must eviserate you first

Punt him back to Poland.

I'd see if his head can come off