Greentext Stories - Images
Lifestyle of the Rich and Famous... | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 922 KB PNG 07/03/21(Sat)11:12:40 No.64419340 >wage slut. minimum wage + unpaid overtime! >finaly save enough money to buy myself a fridge >have to ask coworker, if he can help me pick it up, caus no car >"no problem! Anon" >f--- yeah, i now have a fridge in my flat >next day, everyone at work gossips in what a s------- i live View Thread](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/642/86e.png)
![: Anonymous 922 KB PNG 07/03/21(Sat)11:12:40 No.64419340 >wage slut. minimum wage + unpaid overtime! >finaly save enough money to buy myself a fridge >have to ask coworker, if he can help me pick it up, caus no car >"no problem! Anon" >f--- yeah, i now have a fridge in my flat >next day, everyone at work gossips in what a s------- i live View Thread](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/642/86e.png)
Greentext Stories
anon gets fired | /r/Greentext
![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/641/d4d.png)
![](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/641/d4d.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon life will change now that he has learned what kind of woman he must get. | /r/Greentext
![11/24/19(Sun)20:12:58 No.55496843 Anonymous 58 KB JPG : Anonymous Why the f--- didn't I think of this, thanks OP >>55496890 # why don't you just date an attractive woman? >pleasant to look at >sex is better >will make you happier and more confident 11/24/19(Sun)20:14:27 No.55496858](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/597/9fe.jpg)
![11/24/19(Sun)20:12:58 No.55496843 Anonymous 58 KB JPG : Anonymous Why the f--- didn't I think of this, thanks OP >>55496890 # why don't you just date an attractive woman? >pleasant to look at >sex is better >will make you happier and more confident 11/24/19(Sun)20:14:27 No.55496858](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/597/9fe.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon feels miserable | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 04/06/22(Wed)09:41:41 No.66217833 >>66217076 (OP) # >random girl sit next to me on the bus >immediately think she wants my d--- How do I stop this? She even accidentally touched my arm when trying to get her bag and I got a boner I'm really miserable >>66217883 # >>66217907 # >>66217936 # >>66217983 #](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/575/bfb.jpg)
![: Anonymous 04/06/22(Wed)09:41:41 No.66217833 >>66217076 (OP) # >random girl sit next to me on the bus >immediately think she wants my d--- How do I stop this? She even accidentally touched my arm when trying to get her bag and I got a boner I'm really miserable >>66217883 # >>66217907 # >>66217936 # >>66217983 #](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/575/bfb.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon does not believe in education | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous (ID: Bn2k8j5f) non-stem degrees are worthless 04/30/22(Sat)14:17:32 No.375372252 Hooters waitress shows how much she makes in tips during a normal workday: I'm working at the wrong restaurant >be female >keep a healthy diet >exercise >work as a waitress >earn $382/day in tips as a server >$100k in tips annually for serving food He's WOO 1.25 MB PNG >zero debt or >get meme non-stem degree >go into six-figure debt >graduate with degree >start earning 30-50k/year](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/557/a25.jpg)
![: Anonymous (ID: Bn2k8j5f) non-stem degrees are worthless 04/30/22(Sat)14:17:32 No.375372252 Hooters waitress shows how much she makes in tips during a normal workday: I'm working at the wrong restaurant >be female >keep a healthy diet >exercise >work as a waitress >earn $382/day in tips as a server >$100k in tips annually for serving food He's WOO 1.25 MB PNG >zero debt or >get meme non-stem degree >go into six-figure debt >graduate with degree >start earning 30-50k/year](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/557/a25.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is traumatized. | /r/Greentext
![04/30/22(Sat)02:10:06 No.68430973 >Dad started teasing me about girls when I was like four years old >If I interacted with one in any capacity, he'd try to embarrass me by going "Anon and [girl] sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G" or s--- like that 33 KB PNG >Even glancing at one or mentioning their name in passing was enough to set him off asking if she's my giiirlfriiiiend >This taught me to think that I can't talk to girls like normal humans and that any ackowledgement of their existence constitutes flirting >Assume girls will be disgusted or insulted if I even make eye contact with them because I'm not exactly a catch >As a teenager I skipped going to a couple events I'd been invited to because there would be a lot of girls >Now I'm about to turn 30 and still afraid to talk to women unless it's for strictly utilitarian reasons It's almost perversely satisfying that he'll never have grandkids. Anonymous](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/528/121.png)
![04/30/22(Sat)02:10:06 No.68430973 >Dad started teasing me about girls when I was like four years old >If I interacted with one in any capacity, he'd try to embarrass me by going "Anon and [girl] sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G" or s--- like that 33 KB PNG >Even glancing at one or mentioning their name in passing was enough to set him off asking if she's my giiirlfriiiiend >This taught me to think that I can't talk to girls like normal humans and that any ackowledgement of their existence constitutes flirting >Assume girls will be disgusted or insulted if I even make eye contact with them because I'm not exactly a catch >As a teenager I skipped going to a couple events I'd been invited to because there would be a lot of girls >Now I'm about to turn 30 and still afraid to talk to women unless it's for strictly utilitarian reasons It's almost perversely satisfying that he'll never have grandkids. Anonymous](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/528/121.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon knows | /r/Greentext
![04/29/22(Fri)17:32:41 No.877174953 : Anonymous >buy this tiny metal block anon >you can hold it close to your face >your loved ones will talk to you from thousands of miles away 0000 >you will hear all their voices >not a thing connecting you but you will feel like you're next to them 155 KB JPG Ok retards, you're all either full schitzo or the government really has you by the balls. Wake up and think for yourselves for once.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/503/909.jpg)
![04/29/22(Fri)17:32:41 No.877174953 : Anonymous >buy this tiny metal block anon >you can hold it close to your face >your loved ones will talk to you from thousands of miles away 0000 >you will hear all their voices >not a thing connecting you but you will feel like you're next to them 155 KB JPG Ok retards, you're all either full schitzo or the government really has you by the balls. Wake up and think for yourselves for once.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/503/909.jpg)
Greentext Stories
> Chad-non | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 186 KB PNG >"nope, for me" >"aren't those toys a little girly for you?" >"I need some w----- for my GI Joes" 08/02/21 (Mon)12:52:04 No.860168561 >be me >9yo >shopping at Toys R Us >pick out some Barbie dolls >go to checkout >clerk smiles and asks "oh, are you shopping for your sister or cousin?"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/502/b37.jpg)
![: Anonymous 186 KB PNG >"nope, for me" >"aren't those toys a little girly for you?" >"I need some w----- for my GI Joes" 08/02/21 (Mon)12:52:04 No.860168561 >be me >9yo >shopping at Toys R Us >pick out some Barbie dolls >go to checkout >clerk smiles and asks "oh, are you shopping for your sister or cousin?"](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/502/b37.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon switches teams | /r/Greentext
![1h (4/29 20:00) -68422845 21 Re 5 Img JPG 368KB (2000 x 1924) 9 Replies ANON, I'M BORED! ... CAN WE SNUGGLE UP IN BLANKETS AND WATCH ANIMEP YOU HAVE SOME SNACKS? HEY ANON WHAT WE KISSED UNDER BLANCKETSP IT'S NOT GAY, BRO! Reminder to take the femboy pill. Women arent worth it anons, take it from an oldfag who's been here since like 2011. >Be me, late teens early 20s, always ugly and invisible to girls, rejected the few times i asked them out because I'm not chad >Be depressed for several years, develop slight agoraphobia >go on dating apps, still rejected and never swiped right on >decide enough is enough and looksmaxx >hit the gym, change hair, start wearing makeup and do proper skincare in my mid-late 20s (27 now) >Women on tinder start throwing themselves at me and I end up hating all of them since they're all shallow since they wouldnt give me the time of day before i looksmaxxed, fake, and i cant talk about anything I'm interested in with them >meet a femboy at an anime convention with friends, we hit it off >in a loving relationship with him and he completes me like no one else does, accepts me for who i am, and want to make him my wife (male) No seriously, why do you want women instead of a nice, loving femboy?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/391/02c.jpg)
![1h (4/29 20:00) -68422845 21 Re 5 Img JPG 368KB (2000 x 1924) 9 Replies ANON, I'M BORED! ... CAN WE SNUGGLE UP IN BLANKETS AND WATCH ANIMEP YOU HAVE SOME SNACKS? HEY ANON WHAT WE KISSED UNDER BLANCKETSP IT'S NOT GAY, BRO! Reminder to take the femboy pill. Women arent worth it anons, take it from an oldfag who's been here since like 2011. >Be me, late teens early 20s, always ugly and invisible to girls, rejected the few times i asked them out because I'm not chad >Be depressed for several years, develop slight agoraphobia >go on dating apps, still rejected and never swiped right on >decide enough is enough and looksmaxx >hit the gym, change hair, start wearing makeup and do proper skincare in my mid-late 20s (27 now) >Women on tinder start throwing themselves at me and I end up hating all of them since they're all shallow since they wouldnt give me the time of day before i looksmaxxed, fake, and i cant talk about anything I'm interested in with them >meet a femboy at an anime convention with friends, we hit it off >in a loving relationship with him and he completes me like no one else does, accepts me for who i am, and want to make him my wife (male) No seriously, why do you want women instead of a nice, loving femboy?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/391/02c.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon likes weed | /r/Greentext
![04/29/22(Fri)12:47:50 No.877184485 If you knew weed was being used to mind control you. Would you stop using? 04/29/22(Fri)12:49:36 No.877184565 04/29/22 (Fri) 12:50:20 No.877184601 04/29/22(Fri) 12:51:03 No.877184634 : Anonymous Marijuana 49 KB JPG : Anonymous >>877184717 # : Anonymous >>877184717 # : Anonymous >>877184485 (OP) # Yeah but it isn't so f--- off](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/390/c6a.jpg)
![04/29/22(Fri)12:47:50 No.877184485 If you knew weed was being used to mind control you. Would you stop using? 04/29/22(Fri)12:49:36 No.877184565 04/29/22 (Fri) 12:50:20 No.877184601 04/29/22(Fri) 12:51:03 No.877184634 : Anonymous Marijuana 49 KB JPG : Anonymous >>877184717 # : Anonymous >>877184717 # : Anonymous >>877184485 (OP) # Yeah but it isn't so f--- off](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/390/c6a.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon understands capitalism | /r/Greentext
![04/30/22(Sat)01:55:41 No.877199058 >>877193048 (OP) # >Go to work >Get your own place >Try to be a functioning member of society : Anonymous 200 KB PNG >Have less money than when you were unemployed](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/389/eab.jpg)
![04/30/22(Sat)01:55:41 No.877199058 >>877193048 (OP) # >Go to work >Get your own place >Try to be a functioning member of society : Anonymous 200 KB PNG >Have less money than when you were unemployed](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/389/eab.jpg)
Greentext Stories
The perfect man | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 07/12/21 (Mon)18:44:32 No.62544328 >5 dozen eggs every morning Does this actually work? 831 KB GIF : Anonymous 07/12/21(Mon)18:47:48 No.62544353 >>62544328 (OP) # No, not only is it far too much cholesterol, but the very idea that Gaston would have been able to access that many eggs is patently ridiculous. There is simply no way that a hunter -even a fairly successful one - living in pre-Industrial France would have been able to cost-effectively purchase that many eggs. Hell, even buying five dozen eggs a single time would have been difficult. There were no large-scale coops capable of producing that level of output; most people owned a few chickens at the most, and eggs were laid in the "wild." I am not sure what Howard Ashman was thinking with this lyric, but it is responsible for grossly misinforming an entire generation about the availability of eggs in late-medieval France.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/388/64d.jpg)
![: Anonymous 07/12/21 (Mon)18:44:32 No.62544328 >5 dozen eggs every morning Does this actually work? 831 KB GIF : Anonymous 07/12/21(Mon)18:47:48 No.62544353 >>62544328 (OP) # No, not only is it far too much cholesterol, but the very idea that Gaston would have been able to access that many eggs is patently ridiculous. There is simply no way that a hunter -even a fairly successful one - living in pre-Industrial France would have been able to cost-effectively purchase that many eggs. Hell, even buying five dozen eggs a single time would have been difficult. There were no large-scale coops capable of producing that level of output; most people owned a few chickens at the most, and eggs were laid in the "wild." I am not sure what Howard Ashman was thinking with this lyric, but it is responsible for grossly misinforming an entire generation about the availability of eggs in late-medieval France.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/388/64d.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is airheaded | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 23 KB PNG >Bending over and everything >Get the perfect view This was intentional, r-right bros? 04/30/22(Sat)02:21:05 No.68426962 >Be me >Have gym crush >We always sneak peeks at each other and s--- >On leg machine earlier today >She comes over and gets on the machine right in front of me](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/387/44a.jpg)
![: Anonymous 23 KB PNG >Bending over and everything >Get the perfect view This was intentional, r-right bros? 04/30/22(Sat)02:21:05 No.68426962 >Be me >Have gym crush >We always sneak peeks at each other and s--- >On leg machine earlier today >She comes over and gets on the machine right in front of me](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/387/44a.jpg)
Greentext Stories
anon is retarded | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)18:11:42 No.870858186 I got a good one for y'all >be me >4th grade >new class so we're all introducing ourselves >Teacher says to think up an 16 KB PNG adjective that describes us and starts with the first letter of our name >hear my classmates think of stuff like "Strong Shawn" and "Kind Kelly" >can't think of anything >imfreakingout.png >it's my turn now >now or never >"uh..r-r-retarded richard" >whole class laughs >teachers gets mad and sends me to the principal >suspended for a week for ableist language >mfw when i return and the whole class likes me Being a retard has it's perks](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/339/13e.jpg)
![: Anonymous 01/17/22(Mon)18:11:42 No.870858186 I got a good one for y'all >be me >4th grade >new class so we're all introducing ourselves >Teacher says to think up an 16 KB PNG adjective that describes us and starts with the first letter of our name >hear my classmates think of stuff like "Strong Shawn" and "Kind Kelly" >can't think of anything >imfreakingout.png >it's my turn now >now or never >"uh..r-r-retarded richard" >whole class laughs >teachers gets mad and sends me to the principal >suspended for a week for ableist language >mfw when i return and the whole class likes me Being a retard has it's perks](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/339/13e.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon is a virgin | /r/Greentext
![Settings Home 09/10/14(Wed) 20:17:30 No.568048234 Yo did I just f--- up? I'm 95% certain I did. >girl I know is nursing student >solid 9/10 >tells me she knows how to test for testicular cancer and can show me >tell her I learned in health class in high school and can do myself I'm pretty sure I'm a f------ idiot Board /b/ - Random Anonymous (ID: 86Cv+14z 38 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/331/9ad.jpg)
![Settings Home 09/10/14(Wed) 20:17:30 No.568048234 Yo did I just f--- up? I'm 95% certain I did. >girl I know is nursing student >solid 9/10 >tells me she knows how to test for testicular cancer and can show me >tell her I learned in health class in high school and can do myself I'm pretty sure I'm a f------ idiot Board /b/ - Random Anonymous (ID: 86Cv+14z 38 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/331/9ad.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon speaks the truth the | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 272 KB PNG 09/16/18(Sun)17:48:29 No.48171415 >Women can send you to jail for a decade and ruin your life and reputation >If she is caught out as a liar she will only get a year in prison](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/357/330/09e.jpg)
![: Anonymous 272 KB PNG 09/16/18(Sun)17:48:29 No.48171415 >Women can send you to jail for a decade and ruin your life and reputation >If she is caught out as a liar she will only get a year in prison](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/357/330/09e.jpg)
Greentext Stories