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this is what all true paladins strive for

File 1304534779.ipg-(760 KB, 1680x1050, tyrael final.jpg) Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:46 No. 14812285 There's been all sorts of talk about making Paladins fall. In my campaign, I was no stranger to attempts □ Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:47 No.14812295 14812285 Go on Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:47 No. 14812299 What happened when there was a choice of letting an innocent man accused of murder (via possession) die or let the victim's family never get their justice? I took a third option and hunted down that f------ demon haunting his dreams, brought it back and manifested it into reality, and brought IT to court What happened when there was a choice between slaying an entire barbarian clan for "vengeance" or leaving a corrupt captain pretending to be a martyr of goodygoody beliefs in charge of a fort? took a third option and Smite Evild the captain's ass in public, letting everyone in public see he wasn't the pure good bastion he pretended to be, leaving him to the machinations of the people who now realized they'd been decieved Several other times...I think five, total. Five times, I was shoehorned into a situation to choose between what's semi-right, and every time I picked a third option. The BBEG's second-in-command was a Blackguard, and every time we met she would always talk about how I was going to fall, like he did, and it was an inevitablility-and every time, I told her that there is never an inevitability of evil There is only justice If I'm pushed into a situation where I need to choose between the lesser of two evils, I refuse those conditions and I refuse to even consider them. You do not tear things apart, spread your own misery across the land, and then ask me to abide by your rules and your options. No, that is not how l play your f------ game □ Anonymous 05/04/11 (Wed)14:48 No.14812306 So what happens when we finally meet the BBEG? The second-in-command does her usual "darkness is inevitable, everyone is doomed, etc etc" rant, and I shut her off right there. Despite all of the temptations, despite all of the problems, I never once fell. Never once. Despite all of the problems the BBEG had spread across the land and despite all his forces, we never once failed. Never once Darkness was never inevitable, and no amount of dismissing even the tiniest problem would keep it from staring them in the f------ face. He wanted to talk about how he expected us and how we were amusing and other such condenscending b-------, but despite all of his smugness never once did he incorporate any prevention for this "amusing problem" into his plan And you know what? Instead of the usual torrents of You fool!" or This is true powe or You struggle against the inevitable!", the Blackguard believed it. She f------ believed it She went down on her f------ knees, right in front of her master, and said she wanted no longer to be against us. That I had demonstrated that honor existed, even in darkness, and that even in a world of corruption and grey morality, there can still be heroism. Never once did I fall, and what did the GM do? Rather than continue, he just gave up and rewarded me. Instead of continuing to try and shoehorn me into situations, the GM converted one of the biggest lieutenants of evil to our side and put me in charge of guiding her along the path of redemption Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:49 No. 14812315 File 1304534959 gif-(168 KB, 300x300, light-pelvic-thrust.gif) tl:dr: MY PALADIN JUST REDEEMED A BLACKGUARD THROUGH SHEER FORCE OF WILL AN ENTIRE CAMPAIGN OF SUFFERING, JUSTIFIED RIGHT NOW ALL YALL CAN JUST TAKE IT
File 1304534779.ipg-(760 KB, 1680x1050, tyrael final.jpg) Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:46 No. 14812285 There's been all sorts of talk about making Paladins fall. In my campaign, I was no stranger to attempts □ Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:47 No.14812295 14812285 Go on Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:47 No. 14812299 What happened when there was a choice of letting an innocent man accused of murder (via possession) die or let the victim's family never get their justice? I took a third option and hunted down that f------ demon haunting his dreams, brought it back and manifested it into reality, and brought IT to court What happened when there was a choice between slaying an entire barbarian clan for "vengeance" or leaving a corrupt captain pretending to be a martyr of goodygoody beliefs in charge of a fort? took a third option and Smite Evild the captain's ass in public, letting everyone in public see he wasn't the pure good bastion he pretended to be, leaving him to the machinations of the people who now realized they'd been decieved Several other times...I think five, total. Five times, I was shoehorned into a situation to choose between what's semi-right, and every time I picked a third option. The BBEG's second-in-command was a Blackguard, and every time we met she would always talk about how I was going to fall, like he did, and it was an inevitablility-and every time, I told her that there is never an inevitability of evil There is only justice If I'm pushed into a situation where I need to choose between the lesser of two evils, I refuse those conditions and I refuse to even consider them. You do not tear things apart, spread your own misery across the land, and then ask me to abide by your rules and your options. No, that is not how l play your f------ game □ Anonymous 05/04/11 (Wed)14:48 No.14812306 So what happens when we finally meet the BBEG? The second-in-command does her usual "darkness is inevitable, everyone is doomed, etc etc" rant, and I shut her off right there. Despite all of the temptations, despite all of the problems, I never once fell. Never once. Despite all of the problems the BBEG had spread across the land and despite all his forces, we never once failed. Never once Darkness was never inevitable, and no amount of dismissing even the tiniest problem would keep it from staring them in the f------ face. He wanted to talk about how he expected us and how we were amusing and other such condenscending b-------, but despite all of his smugness never once did he incorporate any prevention for this "amusing problem" into his plan And you know what? Instead of the usual torrents of You fool!" or This is true powe or You struggle against the inevitable!", the Blackguard believed it. She f------ believed it She went down on her f------ knees, right in front of her master, and said she wanted no longer to be against us. That I had demonstrated that honor existed, even in darkness, and that even in a world of corruption and grey morality, there can still be heroism. Never once did I fall, and what did the GM do? Rather than continue, he just gave up and rewarded me. Instead of continuing to try and shoehorn me into situations, the GM converted one of the biggest lieutenants of evil to our side and put me in charge of guiding her along the path of redemption Anonymous 05/04/11(Wed)14:49 No. 14812315 File 1304534959 gif-(168 KB, 300x300, light-pelvic-thrust.gif) tl:dr: MY PALADIN JUST REDEEMED A BLACKGUARD THROUGH SHEER FORCE OF WILL AN ENTIRE CAMPAIGN OF SUFFERING, JUSTIFIED RIGHT NOW ALL YALL CAN JUST TAKE IT

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this is how you get germans

ile 02878 in-149 KB, 470x706, Bane_TDKR3 jpg) Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)06:05 No.22578538 Replies: There's a Paladin after us This requires context. Paladins in this setting are the servants of a terrifying entity, a god they call "He Who Will Be," whose domains are confusing, expansive, and apocalyptic. He has other deities enslaved to his will-and they arent pushovers, they're evil gods who we fought multiple campaigns ago and banished from our world. We're talking Lovecraft stuff here, creatures that were going to eat the world. In the heavens, the gods of our world are doing battle with this monster's servants, but on the ground, it's everyone against the Paladins, who are forging a path of followers and temples so that He Who Will Be can enter our world and f------ punk us. They're monsters. They don't die of age. They have magic that bypasses the Hollow. They have flaming swords that can touch the spirit world as well as the physical, and people they kill cannot be resurrected. Speaking with the dead brings forth a cacophony of screams, suggesting that those they slay are locked in some eternal prison of suffering. This setting doesn't have a hell. Or it didnt, it seems to now Anyway, we ran afoul of one of these guys. We shot him w a hand-bombard, and we thought we'd killed him. But he didn't die, and he's chasing our asses down with an army of converts promised a free pass into paradise for whoever brings him one of our heads. ones Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)06:08 No.22578569 sounds cool, op □ OP 01/14/13(Mon○6-16 No 22578620 Replies: 22225786662-22s79222 1358162160856 i09-(410 KB, 2789x621, HandBombardWestemEurope 1.) jpg) We first encountered the Paladin in a s----- little fishing village in the southem st llegon, where we were supposed to be recovering an artifact some tools had dredged up out of the ocean. Sin." I'm sure you can guess that we were looking for the same thing What we found instead was a huge guy in plate with a bunch of jackbooted thugs storming through the village, beating the s--- out of people to try and find an There were four of us, plus two guides we had hired, and about thirty of them. We met our contact at the appointed spot, but he refused to give us the item unless we saved his family from the Paladin and his men. They were under suspicion, and would probably be killed if the item wasn't found So we poled out a raft to their ship in the night, climbed on board, and busted the folks out, minimal fuss. We went back, and the man told us that he'd put the item in a safe place, but that he couldn't recover it because of some foul magic. He directed u cave near the village. We had to get in and out right as the tide was coming in--a clever mechanism lifted heavy gates using the tide with buoyant floats. It'd drown smartasses who didn't understand the system, but would let us through. So we went in, and found that the 'safe place' was an ancient temple to some sort of dark sea god, with a chest millennia old. The fisherman can't have possibly installed it, and the inscriptions suggested a high degree of eldritch lore required to open the damn thing. Knowledge that we, of course, had. We opened it, and found a totem made out of whale bones and gold, and made our way out of the facility Who was waiting for us on the beach, you ask? Who else, the Paladin and his men. Thankfully, Chippy was a clever lad, and had kept his cannon above water □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)06:23 No.22578678 Replies: >2225787122)22579222 So Chip tells us to hold them off while he preps the match. The three of us step forward. The Paladin says, you know, kill them, and then our fisherman contact comes up and starts giving him the 'this wasnt part of the deall" line So we fight some fanatics, who are actually not pushovers at all. There are only ten of them to our four, but they killed Barque and Dyson, and I got a level 4 to the lower abdomen (which is actually about as good as dying) before Chip burns a bunch of Luck to press the bombard right up against the last dude's back, and then shoot through him to hit the Paladin, who, in the middle of his own conversation, picked up the fisherman and moved him into the way Still, two bodies isnt enough to stop a hand cannon, and the Paladin was thrown right off his feet onto his ass, with a honking big hole in his chest. Chip tries to help me, but his surgery score is s---. The only reason I survived was, it turned out, because the Icon of Sin prevented me from dying until he could get me to a surgeon. In the fuss, we forgot to check the Paladin. That came back to haunt us late □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)06.49 No.22578893 Repies:-32STaazm22ST3222 So, after this first encounter, we were marked. The Paladins' henchmen didn't know us by face or name, but the Paladins themselves could tell that we were bad guys. I figured it's some sort of faction thing, they could just tell if you had f----- with their s--- before Anyway, I was down and out for a few sessions, so I took on a temporary PC in the form of my characters uncle, and went off with Chip to try and get the artifact to our employer. The employer was a wealthy patron in a wealthy trade city, also in llegon but further north. We didn't want to risk going by ship specially since the artifact might've been connected to water somehow, so we went by land We figured out that we were being followed, and fast. We saw fires appear in the treeline, and sometimes even right off the paths we were walking on. Spontaneous fire is a big sign that He Who Will Be is watching, so we hustled up and went to grab some new meat sh-FRIENDS, I mean friends, yes We picked up some more muscle in a city that I think had a name, but I cant remember. Our dead friends players, as a badass halberdier named Dutchie, and a Viking looking for revenge against the people who had slaughtered his fleet in the Battle of Black Day (which none of us were present for, but we got a brief poem on it) which, obviously, were the Paladins We made it to the city unmolested, but for the grace of god, and even to our employer's house before things started getting fun. □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)06:58 No 22578962 Replies Anyway, we go in to his manor, and tum in our find, and our employer has this flock of inventors and scholors and scribes there to receive it. They all start prattling on about from the deep and 'bones of the ancients' and 'echoes of the hollow and just everything else that you'd expect people trying to make impressive to their boss would a find sound I say "1 got stabbed in the stomach and it kept me alive." and the aristocrat raises an eyebrow. Like, he didn't actually expect it to do anything. But it does, in fact, when he puts it in seawater, it begins letting out this creepy sound, like a whalesong played with way too much bass. He frowns at it, and says that this wasn't what he asked for, we were supposed to bring him a fake that we was having smuggled in, it was supposed to be full of silkworm cacoons. He then looks up, and he's horrified, and says "you brought a Deep Charm into my house!?" And then there's a crash from downstairs, as the door breaks in, and there's shouting and the clashing of steel. Chip and I get this feeling like our tongues are being pulled on by some invisible force. This, I would later discover, was the sign that Paladins a say ing you □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)07. 12 No.22579053 Replea 2257310amsram The aristocrat takes a bag of gold (our pay) and puts it on the table, and tells us hell pay us double if we take the charm and get the f--- out of his house before the gestappo gets upstairs. Chip is already loading his gun. I take the money and the charm, and our dear employer flees behind a bookcase on tracks into a panic room, along with two maids and some of his scribes. The rest flee further upstairs while we prepare to fight our way out The first men into the room are funkies, same as we fought before. This time we were a bit better prepared. We took them out, and pushed our way downstairs, and then out into the coutyard and towards the stables And lo and behold, who comes around the corner the second after Chip fires off his shot? It's Paladin Bane. Up until this moment, we've only heard him speak once, and the GM paraphrased him. This time he does a voice. The Bane Voice. A firearm is an effective tool... When loaded." he says. Chip hefts the thing like a club, and gets ready to fight as more of the Paladin's flunkies armive. We're not even hurt yet (l think the Viking got hit once, but it was a low level bludgeoning wound, those dont do anything really), but we're outnumbered and this time, Chip doesn't have a bullet to save us Give me the charm, and I will kill you." we don't bother going through the "dont you mean OR you'll kill us?" Shtick with him. We know damn well what he means. He gives the signal for his men to attack, and they do. He hangs back, watching. The callousness of the Paladins towards their own mens deaths might actually be intentional, maybe they like winnowing out the weak. Maybe it's how they recruit. Hell if I know We fought for a few rounds. The numbers were less stacked against us this time, but when we vanquished them, the Paladin was still there, and we were all cut up and bleeding. I've got the charm, my character at the moment wasnt even at the original event, I don't care enough to die over this. | OP 01/14/13(Mon)07:19 No.22579 109 Reples: n22579180 >>22579262 So I threaten to break the damn thing if he doesnt let us go. I was sure it wouldn't work, but the Paladin actually hesitates, and says "l mean to break the item anyway." But he's not very convincing. So I start making like I'm going to snap it in half, and he relents, moving out of the way of the stables so t we can go However, as we're mounting up. more of his men arrive, and some of them have guns. I hold the item up in front of me, and look at the Paladin. He tells his men to discharge their weapons into the air, as a show of faith. Im actually pretty impressed with that, so I toss him the item. We already got paid for it after all s hands, he tears it in half, seriously wrenching these golden eels apart like licorice twizzlers. And something happens. He starts smoking, this black ashy soot starts floating off o and he lets out this keening. inhuman how. His men start freaking out, the horses The instant, the INSTANT it start freaking out, and we start freaking out because of all the f------ Willpower tests we're making at difficulty 1 OP 01/14/13(Mon)07:27 No.22579180 Repies: 222579220 3222579262 3222579478 222579744 22582053 I'll tell him. Hell be glad to know tg/s not a bunch of jerks. He must've just had a bad experience o we o and succeed. Chi ais. and starts screaming abou being made o o s. The V king succeeds gets off his horse, and ushes he Paladin hurring and durring it up. So I grab his reins and bolt, leading him to safety while the Viking fights utchie passes and his ass s out o here instantly. spurred and gone want to help the 눼king but Chips guy isn't thinking straight. and his horse s was esent in character for that fight, but I was present OOC, obviously. Whatever breaking that amulet had done gave him some sort of aura of insanity. The Viking. however, flew into a berserk rage, and wasnt about to let a little thing like madness slow him down. He failed round two, didn't give a f--- What he did give a f--- about was that the Paladin's combat pool was at least ten higher than any of ours, and he was wielding a burning sword. Ever tried parrying a buming sword? It sucks! The man got a hit in, and dented in the Paladin's armor. Maybe it was the insanity (it was described as making the world look bizarre, red-coated, like a combination of a Dali painting and Geigers nightmares) but the guy bled yellow light instead of blood The Viking's hair and furs had been on fire for a few rounds now, and the next one set his beard ablaze. The Paladin's final act of cruelty was, somehow, sucking all of the rage out of the defeated Viking, switching off his berserk fury. He died terribly aware of his own anguish, and totally insane □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)07 31 No.22579220 Repies:M22579350 2222579180 We fled for two days. We caught up with Dutchie, and made our way back to where my character was still recovering. My Uncle (thank God he lived, he was the source of my characters wealth!) departed, with the intent of finding a stiff drink to help him forget what he'd just seen, and we were left with the haunting notion of our new enemy Chip, Dutchie and I sat at the table, planning our next move, and one by one, we each felt that pressure on our tongues, as the Paladin turned his gaze to us again. S--- be real yo. And that's all for my stories tonight, but I'm gonna be back. This is such a nice board. Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)0731 No.22579222 Replies:--22579244 Aside from the Bane-isms, this Paladin guy is coming off a lot like Anton Chigur from No Country For Old Men, just a force of nature you can'tr ly oppose. Your GM is absolute god-tier □ OP 01/14/1 3(Mon)06:36 No 22578783 Repies2ms78803-222578868 22578710 That's a major plot point. Ill give you the short version now, but one of my stories does relate to how we discovered this. The Paladins aren't actually powered by their own deity (if what we know now is true,) they're powered by ours. They're like leeches, sent to kill off all opposition by absorbing divine energies. They do this, basically, via iconoclasm. Destroying our temples, burning our holy books, breaking our relics, and killing our priests gives them power, and worse, gives them powers related to the deity they're mugging lot of them have sun-related powers because they basically sacked the Vatican of a country that worships the Unconquerable Sun. The older, more dangerous ones have a recurring theme of magic hammers, nets, and shapeshifting, suggesting that they took it from the Norse Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)08.06 No. 22579506 Reples: 22579550 2258093322582013-22582755-22584240 804537 jpg-(63 KB, 522x700, M90642-Teutonic-Knights-1(...)jpg) He Who Will Be (What He Will Be) Lovecraftian Horror Servants Destroying and absorbing other religions Created Hell Their default power is flaming swords Invading from another world Yahweh. Hope you guys like Germans, because that's the next step
ile 02878 in-149 KB, 470x706, Bane_TDKR3 jpg) Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)06:05 No.22578538 Replies: There's a Paladin after us This requires context. Paladins in this setting are the servants of a terrifying entity, a god they call "He Who Will Be," whose domains are confusing, expansive, and apocalyptic. He has other deities enslaved to his will-and they arent pushovers, they're evil gods who we fought multiple campaigns ago and banished from our world. We're talking Lovecraft stuff here, creatures that were going to eat the world. In the heavens, the gods of our world are doing battle with this monster's servants, but on the ground, it's everyone against the Paladins, who are forging a path of followers and temples so that He Who Will Be can enter our world and f------ punk us. They're monsters. They don't die of age. They have magic that bypasses the Hollow. They have flaming swords that can touch the spirit world as well as the physical, and people they kill cannot be resurrected. Speaking with the dead brings forth a cacophony of screams, suggesting that those they slay are locked in some eternal prison of suffering. This setting doesn't have a hell. Or it didnt, it seems to now Anyway, we ran afoul of one of these guys. We shot him w a hand-bombard, and we thought we'd killed him. But he didn't die, and he's chasing our asses down with an army of converts promised a free pass into paradise for whoever brings him one of our heads. ones Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)06:08 No.22578569 sounds cool, op □ OP 01/14/13(Mon○6-16 No 22578620 Replies: 22225786662-22s79222 1358162160856 i09-(410 KB, 2789x621, HandBombardWestemEurope 1.) jpg) We first encountered the Paladin in a s----- little fishing village in the southem st llegon, where we were supposed to be recovering an artifact some tools had dredged up out of the ocean. Sin." I'm sure you can guess that we were looking for the same thing What we found instead was a huge guy in plate with a bunch of jackbooted thugs storming through the village, beating the s--- out of people to try and find an There were four of us, plus two guides we had hired, and about thirty of them. We met our contact at the appointed spot, but he refused to give us the item unless we saved his family from the Paladin and his men. They were under suspicion, and would probably be killed if the item wasn't found So we poled out a raft to their ship in the night, climbed on board, and busted the folks out, minimal fuss. We went back, and the man told us that he'd put the item in a safe place, but that he couldn't recover it because of some foul magic. He directed u cave near the village. We had to get in and out right as the tide was coming in--a clever mechanism lifted heavy gates using the tide with buoyant floats. It'd drown smartasses who didn't understand the system, but would let us through. So we went in, and found that the 'safe place' was an ancient temple to some sort of dark sea god, with a chest millennia old. The fisherman can't have possibly installed it, and the inscriptions suggested a high degree of eldritch lore required to open the damn thing. Knowledge that we, of course, had. We opened it, and found a totem made out of whale bones and gold, and made our way out of the facility Who was waiting for us on the beach, you ask? Who else, the Paladin and his men. Thankfully, Chippy was a clever lad, and had kept his cannon above water □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)06:23 No.22578678 Replies: >2225787122)22579222 So Chip tells us to hold them off while he preps the match. The three of us step forward. The Paladin says, you know, kill them, and then our fisherman contact comes up and starts giving him the 'this wasnt part of the deall" line So we fight some fanatics, who are actually not pushovers at all. There are only ten of them to our four, but they killed Barque and Dyson, and I got a level 4 to the lower abdomen (which is actually about as good as dying) before Chip burns a bunch of Luck to press the bombard right up against the last dude's back, and then shoot through him to hit the Paladin, who, in the middle of his own conversation, picked up the fisherman and moved him into the way Still, two bodies isnt enough to stop a hand cannon, and the Paladin was thrown right off his feet onto his ass, with a honking big hole in his chest. Chip tries to help me, but his surgery score is s---. The only reason I survived was, it turned out, because the Icon of Sin prevented me from dying until he could get me to a surgeon. In the fuss, we forgot to check the Paladin. That came back to haunt us late □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)06.49 No.22578893 Repies:-32STaazm22ST3222 So, after this first encounter, we were marked. The Paladins' henchmen didn't know us by face or name, but the Paladins themselves could tell that we were bad guys. I figured it's some sort of faction thing, they could just tell if you had f----- with their s--- before Anyway, I was down and out for a few sessions, so I took on a temporary PC in the form of my characters uncle, and went off with Chip to try and get the artifact to our employer. The employer was a wealthy patron in a wealthy trade city, also in llegon but further north. We didn't want to risk going by ship specially since the artifact might've been connected to water somehow, so we went by land We figured out that we were being followed, and fast. We saw fires appear in the treeline, and sometimes even right off the paths we were walking on. Spontaneous fire is a big sign that He Who Will Be is watching, so we hustled up and went to grab some new meat sh-FRIENDS, I mean friends, yes We picked up some more muscle in a city that I think had a name, but I cant remember. Our dead friends players, as a badass halberdier named Dutchie, and a Viking looking for revenge against the people who had slaughtered his fleet in the Battle of Black Day (which none of us were present for, but we got a brief poem on it) which, obviously, were the Paladins We made it to the city unmolested, but for the grace of god, and even to our employer's house before things started getting fun. □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)06:58 No 22578962 Replies Anyway, we go in to his manor, and tum in our find, and our employer has this flock of inventors and scholors and scribes there to receive it. They all start prattling on about from the deep and 'bones of the ancients' and 'echoes of the hollow and just everything else that you'd expect people trying to make impressive to their boss would a find sound I say "1 got stabbed in the stomach and it kept me alive." and the aristocrat raises an eyebrow. Like, he didn't actually expect it to do anything. But it does, in fact, when he puts it in seawater, it begins letting out this creepy sound, like a whalesong played with way too much bass. He frowns at it, and says that this wasn't what he asked for, we were supposed to bring him a fake that we was having smuggled in, it was supposed to be full of silkworm cacoons. He then looks up, and he's horrified, and says "you brought a Deep Charm into my house!?" And then there's a crash from downstairs, as the door breaks in, and there's shouting and the clashing of steel. Chip and I get this feeling like our tongues are being pulled on by some invisible force. This, I would later discover, was the sign that Paladins a say ing you □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)07. 12 No.22579053 Replea 2257310amsram The aristocrat takes a bag of gold (our pay) and puts it on the table, and tells us hell pay us double if we take the charm and get the f--- out of his house before the gestappo gets upstairs. Chip is already loading his gun. I take the money and the charm, and our dear employer flees behind a bookcase on tracks into a panic room, along with two maids and some of his scribes. The rest flee further upstairs while we prepare to fight our way out The first men into the room are funkies, same as we fought before. This time we were a bit better prepared. We took them out, and pushed our way downstairs, and then out into the coutyard and towards the stables And lo and behold, who comes around the corner the second after Chip fires off his shot? It's Paladin Bane. Up until this moment, we've only heard him speak once, and the GM paraphrased him. This time he does a voice. The Bane Voice. A firearm is an effective tool... When loaded." he says. Chip hefts the thing like a club, and gets ready to fight as more of the Paladin's flunkies armive. We're not even hurt yet (l think the Viking got hit once, but it was a low level bludgeoning wound, those dont do anything really), but we're outnumbered and this time, Chip doesn't have a bullet to save us Give me the charm, and I will kill you." we don't bother going through the "dont you mean OR you'll kill us?" Shtick with him. We know damn well what he means. He gives the signal for his men to attack, and they do. He hangs back, watching. The callousness of the Paladins towards their own mens deaths might actually be intentional, maybe they like winnowing out the weak. Maybe it's how they recruit. Hell if I know We fought for a few rounds. The numbers were less stacked against us this time, but when we vanquished them, the Paladin was still there, and we were all cut up and bleeding. I've got the charm, my character at the moment wasnt even at the original event, I don't care enough to die over this. | OP 01/14/13(Mon)07:19 No.22579 109 Reples: n22579180 >>22579262 So I threaten to break the damn thing if he doesnt let us go. I was sure it wouldn't work, but the Paladin actually hesitates, and says "l mean to break the item anyway." But he's not very convincing. So I start making like I'm going to snap it in half, and he relents, moving out of the way of the stables so t we can go However, as we're mounting up. more of his men arrive, and some of them have guns. I hold the item up in front of me, and look at the Paladin. He tells his men to discharge their weapons into the air, as a show of faith. Im actually pretty impressed with that, so I toss him the item. We already got paid for it after all s hands, he tears it in half, seriously wrenching these golden eels apart like licorice twizzlers. And something happens. He starts smoking, this black ashy soot starts floating off o and he lets out this keening. inhuman how. His men start freaking out, the horses The instant, the INSTANT it start freaking out, and we start freaking out because of all the f------ Willpower tests we're making at difficulty 1 OP 01/14/13(Mon)07:27 No.22579180 Repies: 222579220 3222579262 3222579478 222579744 22582053 I'll tell him. Hell be glad to know tg/s not a bunch of jerks. He must've just had a bad experience o we o and succeed. Chi ais. and starts screaming abou being made o o s. The V king succeeds gets off his horse, and ushes he Paladin hurring and durring it up. So I grab his reins and bolt, leading him to safety while the Viking fights utchie passes and his ass s out o here instantly. spurred and gone want to help the 눼king but Chips guy isn't thinking straight. and his horse s was esent in character for that fight, but I was present OOC, obviously. Whatever breaking that amulet had done gave him some sort of aura of insanity. The Viking. however, flew into a berserk rage, and wasnt about to let a little thing like madness slow him down. He failed round two, didn't give a f--- What he did give a f--- about was that the Paladin's combat pool was at least ten higher than any of ours, and he was wielding a burning sword. Ever tried parrying a buming sword? It sucks! The man got a hit in, and dented in the Paladin's armor. Maybe it was the insanity (it was described as making the world look bizarre, red-coated, like a combination of a Dali painting and Geigers nightmares) but the guy bled yellow light instead of blood The Viking's hair and furs had been on fire for a few rounds now, and the next one set his beard ablaze. The Paladin's final act of cruelty was, somehow, sucking all of the rage out of the defeated Viking, switching off his berserk fury. He died terribly aware of his own anguish, and totally insane □ OP 01/14/13(Mon)07 31 No.22579220 Repies:M22579350 2222579180 We fled for two days. We caught up with Dutchie, and made our way back to where my character was still recovering. My Uncle (thank God he lived, he was the source of my characters wealth!) departed, with the intent of finding a stiff drink to help him forget what he'd just seen, and we were left with the haunting notion of our new enemy Chip, Dutchie and I sat at the table, planning our next move, and one by one, we each felt that pressure on our tongues, as the Paladin turned his gaze to us again. S--- be real yo. And that's all for my stories tonight, but I'm gonna be back. This is such a nice board. Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)0731 No.22579222 Replies:--22579244 Aside from the Bane-isms, this Paladin guy is coming off a lot like Anton Chigur from No Country For Old Men, just a force of nature you can'tr ly oppose. Your GM is absolute god-tier □ OP 01/14/1 3(Mon)06:36 No 22578783 Repies2ms78803-222578868 22578710 That's a major plot point. Ill give you the short version now, but one of my stories does relate to how we discovered this. The Paladins aren't actually powered by their own deity (if what we know now is true,) they're powered by ours. They're like leeches, sent to kill off all opposition by absorbing divine energies. They do this, basically, via iconoclasm. Destroying our temples, burning our holy books, breaking our relics, and killing our priests gives them power, and worse, gives them powers related to the deity they're mugging lot of them have sun-related powers because they basically sacked the Vatican of a country that worships the Unconquerable Sun. The older, more dangerous ones have a recurring theme of magic hammers, nets, and shapeshifting, suggesting that they took it from the Norse Anonymous 01/14/13(Mon)08.06 No. 22579506 Reples: 22579550 2258093322582013-22582755-22584240 804537 jpg-(63 KB, 522x700, M90642-Teutonic-Knights-1(...)jpg) He Who Will Be (What He Will Be) Lovecraftian Horror Servants Destroying and absorbing other religions Created Hell Their default power is flaming swords Invading from another world Yahweh. Hope you guys like Germans, because that's the next step

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The tale of mister Bomardini

□ Anonymous 09/04/10(Sat)18:10 No.11 952743團困 Your wish is my command Mister Bombardini was a man of simple, refined tastes. He was also a Macellarius, which to those who dont know/care get to actually eat flesh for Vitae and such. Playing against the usual angst and-gloom of the group, he was presented as an upper class gourmand seeking nothing more than the simple pleasures of eating children and crazy people Fortunately, the GM was willing to allow Bloodlines, and because he (sort of) fit in with the rest of the group, it was allowed. The rest of the group was playing a bunch of angst-goth Mekhet, all wearing leather and packing giant revolvers, so Mister Bombardini was quite out of place in carefully-maintained suit and with his fussy little napkin The point of him was to show it's possible to be dark and evil without actually being over-the-top, oversexualized creatures of the dark. Stats werent the greatest because I dislike the min-maxing of a lot of Bloodline users, but he worked as a combat monster. The first sign of trouble came when l 'accidentally' pulled away a victim from one of the other players, managing to kill their dice rolls and charm them by being a cheerful, fat old man in a nice suit and promises of patronage for the NPC. Y'see, I pulled a victim away from a player who was using the game as wish-fulfillment, and that is a no-no in crazy groups □ Anonymous 09/04/10(Sat) 18:16 No.1 1952794團困 2P Now, after succeeding in eating the random art student and getting ridiculous levels of Vitae, Mister Bombardini decided that it would be a good idea to be a team player for a little while. Now, as a rule, I try to avoid using out-of-game knowledge, but the situation that next arose just called for it. The GM had us running around attempting to 'procure' slaves for some sort of magical o---, and could see where things would end up (Players bring human stock, told to f--- off by vampire we were trying to unseat from their position of power, players get angry, fight ensues) So, in his meek little manner, I voiced my concerns for their plan to raid a bunch of fraternities and sororities (wish fulfillment amirite?) for people and instead suggested a route that wouldnt get us killed. This was, of course, immediately shouted down by all other players, and so he continued being his meek little self. Couple sessions down the road, things have gone as thought they would. At least one player had a character killed and, in true angst fashion, created a carbon copy with poorly-explained reasons for wanting revenge. We're talking "Erase name on sheet, play character again" levels of copy Now, as a gentleman, Mister Bombardini did not, as a rule, enjoy working with these young upstarts, and so decides that a little political maneuveri 09 8:23 No. 11952860 credibly fat man in a suit who tended to eat an At t victims he managed to get alone, and due to the bloodline traits, was pretty damn hard to stop from doing that Politics came in when I cut a deal with the aforementioned plot villain and offered to sell out the group (They were breaking the Masquerade HARD at that point) i This own. Despit c (Doi avin 52951 N This character justification because, up until this point, he'd been helping them with their insane schemes. They su stop them from trying very hard. In the session before Mister out to t n out-0 eded in locking the fre nd left, de nding that the GM si e the he GM had me run through some cops and a local action news crew. After consuming them, Mister Bombardini was sligh So p------, the rules were off, and these f------ needed to die Because they were the stereotypes, the rest of the party co ed to a goth club to celebrate ridding themselves of the fat e. When one of them (Butthurtp s the ni wen The session ended on that high note, and the player demanded that I leave their character alone, because "This actually means something to me!" At this point, there was a lot of shouting, because they figured I was an ass for even considering hurting their precious characters, despite the fact they all just tried to kill mine □ Anonymous 09/04/10(Sat) 18:47 No.11 953155團困 P3 "With a final gasp, Mister Bombardini falls into Final Death" While I was out, it was decided that the Torreador was offended by his Lack of refinement in appearance (despite wearing a well-kept suit and generally being the only in the party not lookin That owws wh
□ Anonymous 09/04/10(Sat)18:10 No.11 952743團困 Your wish is my command Mister Bombardini was a man of simple, refined tastes. He was also a Macellarius, which to those who dont know/care get to actually eat flesh for Vitae and such. Playing against the usual angst and-gloom of the group, he was presented as an upper class gourmand seeking nothing more than the simple pleasures of eating children and crazy people Fortunately, the GM was willing to allow Bloodlines, and because he (sort of) fit in with the rest of the group, it was allowed. The rest of the group was playing a bunch of angst-goth Mekhet, all wearing leather and packing giant revolvers, so Mister Bombardini was quite out of place in carefully-maintained suit and with his fussy little napkin The point of him was to show it's possible to be dark and evil without actually being over-the-top, oversexualized creatures of the dark. Stats werent the greatest because I dislike the min-maxing of a lot of Bloodline users, but he worked as a combat monster. The first sign of trouble came when l 'accidentally' pulled away a victim from one of the other players, managing to kill their dice rolls and charm them by being a cheerful, fat old man in a nice suit and promises of patronage for the NPC. Y'see, I pulled a victim away from a player who was using the game as wish-fulfillment, and that is a no-no in crazy groups □ Anonymous 09/04/10(Sat) 18:16 No.1 1952794團困 2P Now, after succeeding in eating the random art student and getting ridiculous levels of Vitae, Mister Bombardini decided that it would be a good idea to be a team player for a little while. Now, as a rule, I try to avoid using out-of-game knowledge, but the situation that next arose just called for it. The GM had us running around attempting to 'procure' slaves for some sort of magical o---, and could see where things would end up (Players bring human stock, told to f--- off by vampire we were trying to unseat from their position of power, players get angry, fight ensues) So, in his meek little manner, I voiced my concerns for their plan to raid a bunch of fraternities and sororities (wish fulfillment amirite?) for people and instead suggested a route that wouldnt get us killed. This was, of course, immediately shouted down by all other players, and so he continued being his meek little self. Couple sessions down the road, things have gone as thought they would. At least one player had a character killed and, in true angst fashion, created a carbon copy with poorly-explained reasons for wanting revenge. We're talking "Erase name on sheet, play character again" levels of copy Now, as a gentleman, Mister Bombardini did not, as a rule, enjoy working with these young upstarts, and so decides that a little political maneuveri 09 8:23 No. 11952860 credibly fat man in a suit who tended to eat an At t victims he managed to get alone, and due to the bloodline traits, was pretty damn hard to stop from doing that Politics came in when I cut a deal with the aforementioned plot villain and offered to sell out the group (They were breaking the Masquerade HARD at that point) i This own. Despit c (Doi avin 52951 N This character justification because, up until this point, he'd been helping them with their insane schemes. They su stop them from trying very hard. In the session before Mister out to t n out-0 eded in locking the fre nd left, de nding that the GM si e the he GM had me run through some cops and a local action news crew. After consuming them, Mister Bombardini was sligh So p------, the rules were off, and these f------ needed to die Because they were the stereotypes, the rest of the party co ed to a goth club to celebrate ridding themselves of the fat e. When one of them (Butthurtp s the ni wen The session ended on that high note, and the player demanded that I leave their character alone, because "This actually means something to me!" At this point, there was a lot of shouting, because they figured I was an ass for even considering hurting their precious characters, despite the fact they all just tried to kill mine □ Anonymous 09/04/10(Sat) 18:47 No.11 953155團困 P3 "With a final gasp, Mister Bombardini falls into Final Death" While I was out, it was decided that the Torreador was offended by his Lack of refinement in appearance (despite wearing a well-kept suit and generally being the only in the party not lookin That owws wh

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the summer of quests

File: elephant-seal-1.jpg (201 KB, 1000x695) bionic seal quest Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:30:59 No.32389342 you are bionic seal roll for your fate [Reply] P2 Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:31:51 No.32389359 Rolled 71 >32389342 Ascension Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:33:01 No.32389383 32389359 you won Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:59:34 No.32389647 >32389383 Sweet Good quest everybody. Fun times were had File: tmp_IMAG0782993369643.jpg (1.89 MB, 1840x3264) □ Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:46:54 No.32389518 [Reply] Why ie thie hitch so nricev? Sha's chean to cast sure hut w-- is using those ahilitiae affectivay? Ara Madnese decke that nonular
File: elephant-seal-1.jpg (201 KB, 1000x695) bionic seal quest Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:30:59 No.32389342 you are bionic seal roll for your fate [Reply] P2 Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:31:51 No.32389359 Rolled 71 >32389342 Ascension Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:33:01 No.32389383 32389359 you won Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:59:34 No.32389647 >32389383 Sweet Good quest everybody. Fun times were had File: tmp_IMAG0782993369643.jpg (1.89 MB, 1840x3264) □ Anonymous 05/27/14(Tue)03:46:54 No.32389518 [Reply] Why ie thie hitch so nricev? Sha's chean to cast sure hut w-- is using those ahilitiae affectivay? Ara Madnese decke that nonular

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crows nest man

Anonymous 05/29/13(Wed)01:47 UTC+2 No.25098598 Replies: 25098655250988892509903525101686 P> Oh Krod had a lot of fun in a short set of campaigns. At one point, Krod is hanging with his group as we travel by river. When the GM notes we are passing another boat, he asked us where we were. I said Krod was in the Crow's nest GM: The boat is too small, there is no crow's nest. Me: .he built one. GM: He can't build a crow's nest Me: I haven't chosen a craft skill yet. "Krod is carpenter in free time. He enjoy working with hands in way that doesn't require he put down tarp." GM: "Sigh* you have no tools. Me: Krod glares at some spare planks and they know better than to not be a crow's nest. I roll to intimidate the wood! GM: ...roll it. Krod now has the craft skill: Angry Carpenter
Anonymous 05/29/13(Wed)01:47 UTC+2 No.25098598 Replies: 25098655250988892509903525101686 P> Oh Krod had a lot of fun in a short set of campaigns. At one point, Krod is hanging with his group as we travel by river. When the GM notes we are passing another boat, he asked us where we were. I said Krod was in the Crow's nest GM: The boat is too small, there is no crow's nest. Me: .he built one. GM: He can't build a crow's nest Me: I haven't chosen a craft skill yet. "Krod is carpenter in free time. He enjoy working with hands in way that doesn't require he put down tarp." GM: "Sigh* you have no tools. Me: Krod glares at some spare planks and they know better than to not be a crow's nest. I roll to intimidate the wood! GM: ...roll it. Krod now has the craft skill: Angry Carpenter

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remove furry

□ Anonymous 11/21/14 (Fri) 04:21:15 ID: ba3dac No.381004ー381028 File (hide): 14165734 ipg (10.6 KB, 210x240, 78. Mumm Re.ipa) 724757 >WWIll wipes out nearly all the humans on Earth >only some mutants are left, and you, a mummy now bound to immortal servitude to Ancient Egyptian Gods who actually exist, prove they exist and actually give you powers for worshipping them >sleep for thousands of years >a bunch of f------ furries crash on your planet and decide that Third Earth should now be "New Thundara" and attempt to colonize your f------ planet >try to remove fur-kebab sare apparently the bad guy
□ Anonymous 11/21/14 (Fri) 04:21:15 ID: ba3dac No.381004ー381028 File (hide): 14165734 ipg (10.6 KB, 210x240, 78. Mumm Re.ipa) 724757 >WWIll wipes out nearly all the humans on Earth >only some mutants are left, and you, a mummy now bound to immortal servitude to Ancient Egyptian Gods who actually exist, prove they exist and actually give you powers for worshipping them >sleep for thousands of years >a bunch of f------ furries crash on your planet and decide that Third Earth should now be "New Thundara" and attempt to colonize your f------ planet >try to remove fur-kebab sare apparently the bad guy

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bricks

Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:25 No.6930981 Best thing that ever happened was in a game of Dark Herasy Started on some planet, cant even remember what it was called. Started with humans fighting orks, but we were sent there to investigate the possibility of cult activity. We didn't find them in time, and they managed to use the deaths of all the orks and Guardsmen to fuel a blood ritual of Khorne. We all went OH S---. and started getting as many ciwies out as possible, guardsmen started to retreat too and an extermanatus was called in We ended up being one of the last groups off planet, doing s--- like collapsing buildings and s--- to slow the Chaos hordes advance Then, on the home streatch, roughly 120 yards away from our craft, KHARN THE F------ BETRAYER comes out of a side alley about 60 yards behind us Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:32 No.6931083 6930981 misspelled 'stretch', continuing story The inquisitor leading the group was obviously about to dramatic last stand to let us escape My guy was a standerd Guardsman, and kind of Gimped so l beat him to the punch, GM made the best W-- face I've ever seen, and rolls with it. So I whip out my melta and a gernade, launching one and shooting the other ran into a three story brick building yelling a challenge at Kharn He went 'oh yay, one of the is brave enough to actually fight back and followed me Shooting away, I ran up a staircase, which collapsed underneath him and he sat there going WARP DAMMIT. I kept shooting at him, though all I was doing was superficial damage and he got P----- that this lone guardsman had outsmarted him and kept shooting, so he knocked out all the buildings supports Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:45 No.6931236 6931083 I managed to bail out the window, and took only a little damage, at this point some doohickey on the ship broke and the techpreist was trying to fix it, I looked over and went why are you guys still f------ here!?! At this point Kharn came out of the rubble, saw that I was still alive and started to go into a berserker rage to end ALL berserker rages I looked at the GM.. Me: Well f---. GM: you have a moment before he charges, got anything you want to try? Me: Like what? that was my last gernade, my melta broke jumping out the damn window and if he gets close enough that I can use my mono-knife I'm beyond f-----, to top it off, even if I managed to get to the ship before he catches me, they won't have f------ thing fixed in time GM: Yeah, sucks to be you then Me: *sigh* describe my suroundings GM: Kharn's roughly 20 feet away from you, and your ship's about a hundred yards away. The ground around you is littered with bricks and broken glass, and Me: I throw a brick at him. GM: Who? Me: Kharn GM: Why? Me: Why the f--- not? I'm dead anyway, might as well give him the finger before I go GM: ok roll for it (I hit him easily, he's right there and is about 15 feet tall) GM: Alright, roll damage Me....ten G ten ol das Gm... roll again Me.... ten Gm... roll again Me....ten Gm: f------ seriously? Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:53 No.6931352 6931236 continued I basically rolled 20 something tens and an eight and one shotted Kharn with a brick. The GM described it as me hitting some kind of exposed weak point in his armor, revealed by dropping a building on him I choose to believe I threw the Brick that damned Hard. Either way, my guy got some awesome rewards, that brick became a super holy Demon slayer and I now carry it around in a hip holster F------ best part was when we went back to Terra for some reason, some bigwigs were all: Show us the weapon that Killed Kharn, noble warrior of the Imperium. Then, with no ceremony at all, I handed them the brick. They though I was mocking them and tried to have me executed, until my COs stepped in and went no, no... it's really the brick
Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:25 No.6930981 Best thing that ever happened was in a game of Dark Herasy Started on some planet, cant even remember what it was called. Started with humans fighting orks, but we were sent there to investigate the possibility of cult activity. We didn't find them in time, and they managed to use the deaths of all the orks and Guardsmen to fuel a blood ritual of Khorne. We all went OH S---. and started getting as many ciwies out as possible, guardsmen started to retreat too and an extermanatus was called in We ended up being one of the last groups off planet, doing s--- like collapsing buildings and s--- to slow the Chaos hordes advance Then, on the home streatch, roughly 120 yards away from our craft, KHARN THE F------ BETRAYER comes out of a side alley about 60 yards behind us Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:32 No.6931083 6930981 misspelled 'stretch', continuing story The inquisitor leading the group was obviously about to dramatic last stand to let us escape My guy was a standerd Guardsman, and kind of Gimped so l beat him to the punch, GM made the best W-- face I've ever seen, and rolls with it. So I whip out my melta and a gernade, launching one and shooting the other ran into a three story brick building yelling a challenge at Kharn He went 'oh yay, one of the is brave enough to actually fight back and followed me Shooting away, I ran up a staircase, which collapsed underneath him and he sat there going WARP DAMMIT. I kept shooting at him, though all I was doing was superficial damage and he got P----- that this lone guardsman had outsmarted him and kept shooting, so he knocked out all the buildings supports Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:45 No.6931236 6931083 I managed to bail out the window, and took only a little damage, at this point some doohickey on the ship broke and the techpreist was trying to fix it, I looked over and went why are you guys still f------ here!?! At this point Kharn came out of the rubble, saw that I was still alive and started to go into a berserker rage to end ALL berserker rages I looked at the GM.. Me: Well f---. GM: you have a moment before he charges, got anything you want to try? Me: Like what? that was my last gernade, my melta broke jumping out the damn window and if he gets close enough that I can use my mono-knife I'm beyond f-----, to top it off, even if I managed to get to the ship before he catches me, they won't have f------ thing fixed in time GM: Yeah, sucks to be you then Me: *sigh* describe my suroundings GM: Kharn's roughly 20 feet away from you, and your ship's about a hundred yards away. The ground around you is littered with bricks and broken glass, and Me: I throw a brick at him. GM: Who? Me: Kharn GM: Why? Me: Why the f--- not? I'm dead anyway, might as well give him the finger before I go GM: ok roll for it (I hit him easily, he's right there and is about 15 feet tall) GM: Alright, roll damage Me....ten G ten ol das Gm... roll again Me.... ten Gm... roll again Me....ten Gm: f------ seriously? Anonymous 11/30/09(Mon)00:53 No.6931352 6931236 continued I basically rolled 20 something tens and an eight and one shotted Kharn with a brick. The GM described it as me hitting some kind of exposed weak point in his armor, revealed by dropping a building on him I choose to believe I threw the Brick that damned Hard. Either way, my guy got some awesome rewards, that brick became a super holy Demon slayer and I now carry it around in a hip holster F------ best part was when we went back to Terra for some reason, some bigwigs were all: Show us the weapon that Killed Kharn, noble warrior of the Imperium. Then, with no ceremony at all, I handed them the brick. They though I was mocking them and tried to have me executed, until my COs stepped in and went no, no... it's really the brick

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halfing the dm

Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fri)19:50 No.17533545 By Saftron, Reginald had left the party, as had the Mexican and Brion, all due to personal problems. Such is lfe The Gym Leader wasn't home, and so they were led, one by one, through the biggest clusterfuck they have ever experienced. The Gym played with them, having them fight impossible fights and was set to take advantage of their weaknesses Halfing got caught in a forest of 50-foot tall angry Exeggutor, Mr. Badass had to deal with being stuck in an empty, endless library. Jay had to deal with his fear of Scythers and his memory of losing his eye to one, and Sir Grunt, a good roleplayer always, had a mental breakdown after thinking he lost his Mudkip, causing himself to literally piece his life back together in an elaborate puzzle They all left there a ltle rattled, but badge in hand and with new feat-esque abilties that helped combat their weaknesses. Sir Grunt got a reroll once per encounter on attacks, a way to counteract his bad luck and show how he was improving as a traines Saffron also had the most interesting side-plot, with Mr. Badass and Halfing focusing on geting Silph help on taking down the Rockets, while Jay and Sir Grunt fought the Dojo master, something I really wished the Mexican was there for After Saffron, the Rocket threat was all but wiped up in mainland Kanto Halifling's friend 01/13/12(Fri)19:53 No. 17533575 lt was here I made the biggest mistake in my Dming career.I will always look back at this with a mix of guilt, distrust, and rage Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fri)19:56 No. 17533618 I was not going to be able to DM the following weekend, had things to do Halfing asked if he could try his hand at DMing >After sitting down with him, making sure he had an outline of my plans on Cinnabar, and instructing him to do a short session on the trip to Cinnabar, and gave him some appropriate plot l then went home to deal with a family crisis, ully trusting my friend to handle it well. Anonymous 01/13/12(Frn)19 58 No.17533636 File 1326502691.pn-44 KB, 170x181, 1319726181123 png) S--- a just got real Anonymous 01/13/12(Fri)19 58 No. 17533637 Letting Halfling DM This isn't going to end well. If there's going to be a train wreck here's hoping for the most awkward and paintul one possible Halfling's friend 01/13/12Fri)20:10 No.17533783 came back to、 it could only be described as a goddamn mess Halfing had ignored my suggested hooks, and darkened the campaign insanely >The party had split their efforts to go to Cinnabar, with Mr. Badass, and Sir Grunt taking a small ferry >On the High Seas, with no escape route present, the ran into a Team Rocket BATTLESHIP. A Battleship Desperately fending off what is now Team Rocket Pirates, Hafing's character is "captured, despite others on board dying Sir Grunt and Mr. Badass then had to fend off FIVE WAILORDS, on a sinking ship, as the Rockets made off to Cinnabar after capturing a single person and killing the vast majority of the crew Each of them lost a pokemon >They managed to limp to the island on an injured Marshtomp, and they made a daring rescue mission of Halfing's character. Into the Rocket's underwater base. Underwater Sir Grunt held off the BBEG so Mr. Badass could free Halfing (who was fine, by the way). Sir Grunt lost the remainder of his Luck points that day, and would have lost his Marshtompi Mr. Badass hadnt said "F--- it and had Onix dig through the hull as a last ditch escape Session Halflings friend 01/13/12(Frij20:13 No.17533823 lt tums out that Halfing's character and the rescue party only survived because Arceus helped them ashore, and then went and finished off the Rocket base. That's right, f------ Arceus, had a personal vendetta against the Rockets. Great job there Notice how I have yet to mention Jay yet? s friend Jay, having finally trained up his Pidgeot, had flown to his mother's house. He had been sending his weaker pokemon there, where they were out of harms way He dropped off a few, and lelt the house with onily Pidgeot and his Arcanine, off to Cinnaba On his way there, the tranquil air had turned to a blizzard, and he could catch something fleeting through his vision every once in a while After being repelled from his route by a blizzard, a lightning storm, and quite literally invisible walls, Jay found himself facing a small, pink pokemon, the pokemon he had spent his life looking for after a childhood sighting. Mew Haliflings friend 01/13/12(Frij20:25 No.17533981 While the above were out of nowhere, incredibly dangerous scenes, that were not expected to be solved without player death, and involved bringing a god into the game with a random vendetta against the Rockets, what he did to Jay was the final straw. 25 No Halfling's friend 01/13/12Fri)20:28 No.17534035 He had recounted the events to me clearly "You have to go back It spoke Jay attempted to soldier on, but it kept placing obstacles in his way. He spent the majonity of the session simply attempting to fly to Cinnabar, as the others fought through the -lt blocked his path in more and more lethal ways, invisible walls and inclement weather becoming malicious tornados and direct strikes of lightning aimed towards him :8y this time Jay, a established psychic at the time, had sensed his friend's distress on a relatively high check He would not be stopped Mew 1 will not delay you any longer, but I must tell you that you will face consequences if you continue Jay forged ahead, and the skies cleared. He reached soon before the party, and was the one who witnessed Arceus dragging them ashore >His phone rang Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20:35 No. 17534114 Upon hearing the news, he immediately rushed back to his home, a small cottage just shy of Viridian Forest His house had been reduced to ashes, chunks of his pokemon scattered in all directions A gasping breath brought him to the collapsed house, where his mother was pinned and bleeding >As she died in his arms, he saw a quick motion out of the comer of his eye Jay found himself facing a small, pink pokemon, the pokemon he had spent his life looking for after a childhood sighting Mew It smiled, and left him there Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20:41 No. 17534193 lf these were not reasons enough to hate Halfing, when confronted about the mess he made, he was unable to comprehend how it was a bad thing The campaign got put on hiatus... A retcon would feel hollow, a reminder of things lost, yet continuing the story was impossible 기 only ecent y ended the campaign, with an ever-so-sl ht re con . o g the death 0 Ja s mother it had been Rocket members in my re con, and Mew had amwed too late attempting to tum back to save her, but unable to t y con un cate a th ng but the vaguest Without a BBEG, my storyline ruined, and gods already introduced, ending the campaign wasnt easy Anonymous 01/13/12Fri)20:42 No.17534211 17534193 Too anti-climactic. You didn't punch the f-------. I'm out Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20.43 No.17534218 I punched him where it hurt most, Anon. Anonymous 01/13 12(Fri)20:44 No.17534231 17534218 Better of been his pride, or his testicles Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20:46 No. 17534253 The final session was a whirl of insanity In an attempt at creating the ultimate pokemon from a digital program, the Cinnabar labs went too far, and comupted it on transfer to reality lt ate... everything. Absolutely everything Any attempts at trying to ight t only enlarged its chittering mass Halfing wanted grimdark. and I gave him grimdark. His Primape fell to Missingno as it devoured the island, unstoppable and insatiable Anonymous 01/13/12(Fri)2046 No. 17534262 17534253 Anonymous 01/13 12(Frn)20:47 No.17534270 17534262 he punched him in the soul and then it became infenior digimons, right? Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fril)20:53 No. 17534331 One by one, every weapon brought to bear against it failed lt was content to stay on the island for a while, but then it began to devour the ocean, slowly growing >With Oak and Giovanni's urgings, the hunted down Mewtwo. Four on One, armed with Masterballs, the fight was one-sided The party did not stand a chance If not for Mr. Badass mentioning Giovanni aloud, they would have all perished there Mr. Badass managed to strike a deal with Mewtwohis assistance for Giovanni's head >With that, they retumed to the island and made their final stand Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij21:01 No.17534434 뇌 had earier ruled that I would be remo ng a good number of Halfings luck points to account for is surnal in the Rocket base, and a god helpng him After the f t with Mewtwo none remained Unfortunately for Halfing, his brute force manner of fighting caused him to take a good amount of damage throughout the battle. His Snorlax fell to the cloud of comuption Nearly immune to attacks, only damageable by fire, they did the only thing they could think of With titanic effort, Mewtwo caused the Volcano on Cinnabar to erupt, and the spewing magma and suffocating cloud was enough to bury the creature forever Not before Blastoise fainted, and was consumed should point out that other players did not get out unscathed as well, with Mr Badass's Onix and Sir Grum's Vileplume falling to the eldritch mass. With the final blow struck, and the magma hardening, the epilogue begun Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij21:09 No.17534549 Giovanni spent the rest of his life living in a cave, Mewtwo deeming this a fitting punishment for him. Leaving was impossible, lving with only food stores and a small radio >Mr Badass traveled the world, in search of stronger tests for himself He was known throughout the regions as a legend. Halfing tried for the Pokemon League, but was bested by Sir Grunt in the semi-finals, never reaching his dream. Halling became the Viridian Gym Leader, and had to train a whole new team for the Sir Grunt became Pokemon League Champion, and then set off to travel with Mr. Badass Jay settled down, marrying the Copycat and rebuilding his home. He opened up a small daycare, and lived a life of quiet happiness >After a brief, private discussion with Mr. Badass and Sir Grunt, and a perfect capture roll, on more note was added The two had managed to catch something truly remarkable A legendary beyond legendary, and which negotiated its release for a price They had captured Jraichi, and they had one Wish again END
Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fri)19:50 No.17533545 By Saftron, Reginald had left the party, as had the Mexican and Brion, all due to personal problems. Such is lfe The Gym Leader wasn't home, and so they were led, one by one, through the biggest clusterfuck they have ever experienced. The Gym played with them, having them fight impossible fights and was set to take advantage of their weaknesses Halfing got caught in a forest of 50-foot tall angry Exeggutor, Mr. Badass had to deal with being stuck in an empty, endless library. Jay had to deal with his fear of Scythers and his memory of losing his eye to one, and Sir Grunt, a good roleplayer always, had a mental breakdown after thinking he lost his Mudkip, causing himself to literally piece his life back together in an elaborate puzzle They all left there a ltle rattled, but badge in hand and with new feat-esque abilties that helped combat their weaknesses. Sir Grunt got a reroll once per encounter on attacks, a way to counteract his bad luck and show how he was improving as a traines Saffron also had the most interesting side-plot, with Mr. Badass and Halfing focusing on geting Silph help on taking down the Rockets, while Jay and Sir Grunt fought the Dojo master, something I really wished the Mexican was there for After Saffron, the Rocket threat was all but wiped up in mainland Kanto Halifling's friend 01/13/12(Fri)19:53 No. 17533575 lt was here I made the biggest mistake in my Dming career.I will always look back at this with a mix of guilt, distrust, and rage Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fri)19:56 No. 17533618 I was not going to be able to DM the following weekend, had things to do Halfing asked if he could try his hand at DMing >After sitting down with him, making sure he had an outline of my plans on Cinnabar, and instructing him to do a short session on the trip to Cinnabar, and gave him some appropriate plot l then went home to deal with a family crisis, ully trusting my friend to handle it well. Anonymous 01/13/12(Frn)19 58 No.17533636 File 1326502691.pn-44 KB, 170x181, 1319726181123 png) S--- a just got real Anonymous 01/13/12(Fri)19 58 No. 17533637 Letting Halfling DM This isn't going to end well. If there's going to be a train wreck here's hoping for the most awkward and paintul one possible Halfling's friend 01/13/12Fri)20:10 No.17533783 came back to、 it could only be described as a goddamn mess Halfing had ignored my suggested hooks, and darkened the campaign insanely >The party had split their efforts to go to Cinnabar, with Mr. Badass, and Sir Grunt taking a small ferry >On the High Seas, with no escape route present, the ran into a Team Rocket BATTLESHIP. A Battleship Desperately fending off what is now Team Rocket Pirates, Hafing's character is "captured, despite others on board dying Sir Grunt and Mr. Badass then had to fend off FIVE WAILORDS, on a sinking ship, as the Rockets made off to Cinnabar after capturing a single person and killing the vast majority of the crew Each of them lost a pokemon >They managed to limp to the island on an injured Marshtomp, and they made a daring rescue mission of Halfing's character. Into the Rocket's underwater base. Underwater Sir Grunt held off the BBEG so Mr. Badass could free Halfing (who was fine, by the way). Sir Grunt lost the remainder of his Luck points that day, and would have lost his Marshtompi Mr. Badass hadnt said "F--- it and had Onix dig through the hull as a last ditch escape Session Halflings friend 01/13/12(Frij20:13 No.17533823 lt tums out that Halfing's character and the rescue party only survived because Arceus helped them ashore, and then went and finished off the Rocket base. That's right, f------ Arceus, had a personal vendetta against the Rockets. Great job there Notice how I have yet to mention Jay yet? s friend Jay, having finally trained up his Pidgeot, had flown to his mother's house. He had been sending his weaker pokemon there, where they were out of harms way He dropped off a few, and lelt the house with onily Pidgeot and his Arcanine, off to Cinnaba On his way there, the tranquil air had turned to a blizzard, and he could catch something fleeting through his vision every once in a while After being repelled from his route by a blizzard, a lightning storm, and quite literally invisible walls, Jay found himself facing a small, pink pokemon, the pokemon he had spent his life looking for after a childhood sighting. Mew Haliflings friend 01/13/12(Frij20:25 No.17533981 While the above were out of nowhere, incredibly dangerous scenes, that were not expected to be solved without player death, and involved bringing a god into the game with a random vendetta against the Rockets, what he did to Jay was the final straw. 25 No Halfling's friend 01/13/12Fri)20:28 No.17534035 He had recounted the events to me clearly "You have to go back It spoke Jay attempted to soldier on, but it kept placing obstacles in his way. He spent the majonity of the session simply attempting to fly to Cinnabar, as the others fought through the -lt blocked his path in more and more lethal ways, invisible walls and inclement weather becoming malicious tornados and direct strikes of lightning aimed towards him :8y this time Jay, a established psychic at the time, had sensed his friend's distress on a relatively high check He would not be stopped Mew 1 will not delay you any longer, but I must tell you that you will face consequences if you continue Jay forged ahead, and the skies cleared. He reached soon before the party, and was the one who witnessed Arceus dragging them ashore >His phone rang Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20:35 No. 17534114 Upon hearing the news, he immediately rushed back to his home, a small cottage just shy of Viridian Forest His house had been reduced to ashes, chunks of his pokemon scattered in all directions A gasping breath brought him to the collapsed house, where his mother was pinned and bleeding >As she died in his arms, he saw a quick motion out of the comer of his eye Jay found himself facing a small, pink pokemon, the pokemon he had spent his life looking for after a childhood sighting Mew It smiled, and left him there Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20:41 No. 17534193 lf these were not reasons enough to hate Halfing, when confronted about the mess he made, he was unable to comprehend how it was a bad thing The campaign got put on hiatus... A retcon would feel hollow, a reminder of things lost, yet continuing the story was impossible 기 only ecent y ended the campaign, with an ever-so-sl ht re con . o g the death 0 Ja s mother it had been Rocket members in my re con, and Mew had amwed too late attempting to tum back to save her, but unable to t y con un cate a th ng but the vaguest Without a BBEG, my storyline ruined, and gods already introduced, ending the campaign wasnt easy Anonymous 01/13/12Fri)20:42 No.17534211 17534193 Too anti-climactic. You didn't punch the f-------. I'm out Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20.43 No.17534218 I punched him where it hurt most, Anon. Anonymous 01/13 12(Fri)20:44 No.17534231 17534218 Better of been his pride, or his testicles Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij20:46 No. 17534253 The final session was a whirl of insanity In an attempt at creating the ultimate pokemon from a digital program, the Cinnabar labs went too far, and comupted it on transfer to reality lt ate... everything. Absolutely everything Any attempts at trying to ight t only enlarged its chittering mass Halfing wanted grimdark. and I gave him grimdark. His Primape fell to Missingno as it devoured the island, unstoppable and insatiable Anonymous 01/13/12(Fri)2046 No. 17534262 17534253 Anonymous 01/13 12(Frn)20:47 No.17534270 17534262 he punched him in the soul and then it became infenior digimons, right? Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fril)20:53 No. 17534331 One by one, every weapon brought to bear against it failed lt was content to stay on the island for a while, but then it began to devour the ocean, slowly growing >With Oak and Giovanni's urgings, the hunted down Mewtwo. Four on One, armed with Masterballs, the fight was one-sided The party did not stand a chance If not for Mr. Badass mentioning Giovanni aloud, they would have all perished there Mr. Badass managed to strike a deal with Mewtwohis assistance for Giovanni's head >With that, they retumed to the island and made their final stand Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij21:01 No.17534434 뇌 had earier ruled that I would be remo ng a good number of Halfings luck points to account for is surnal in the Rocket base, and a god helpng him After the f t with Mewtwo none remained Unfortunately for Halfing, his brute force manner of fighting caused him to take a good amount of damage throughout the battle. His Snorlax fell to the cloud of comuption Nearly immune to attacks, only damageable by fire, they did the only thing they could think of With titanic effort, Mewtwo caused the Volcano on Cinnabar to erupt, and the spewing magma and suffocating cloud was enough to bury the creature forever Not before Blastoise fainted, and was consumed should point out that other players did not get out unscathed as well, with Mr Badass's Onix and Sir Grum's Vileplume falling to the eldritch mass. With the final blow struck, and the magma hardening, the epilogue begun Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Frij21:09 No.17534549 Giovanni spent the rest of his life living in a cave, Mewtwo deeming this a fitting punishment for him. Leaving was impossible, lving with only food stores and a small radio >Mr Badass traveled the world, in search of stronger tests for himself He was known throughout the regions as a legend. Halfing tried for the Pokemon League, but was bested by Sir Grunt in the semi-finals, never reaching his dream. Halling became the Viridian Gym Leader, and had to train a whole new team for the Sir Grunt became Pokemon League Champion, and then set off to travel with Mr. Badass Jay settled down, marrying the Copycat and rebuilding his home. He opened up a small daycare, and lived a life of quiet happiness >After a brief, private discussion with Mr. Badass and Sir Grunt, and a perfect capture roll, on more note was added The two had managed to catch something truly remarkable A legendary beyond legendary, and which negotiated its release for a price They had captured Jraichi, and they had one Wish again END

/tg/
8chan /tg/ 4chan greentext traditional games

that guy threads

KB □I guess this will be a That Guy thread Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fn)17:28 No 17531839 So gather around tg/, for my tales of 40k. A story of my start to finish, and how it was wrecked by That Guy, a good friend who becomes a complete bitch in every traditional game I have ever played with him. He will be henceforth referred to as Halfing >Get into 40k with a bunch of friends from high school, on the dawn of 5th edition Their armies are: Space Marines, Space Marines, Chaos Space Manines, Space Marines, and Necrons that were never, ever used because I liked the victory by superior technology aspect they had, and the army was recommended by another player irst games are played, relatively enjoyable, getting the hang of the army in small, 500-1000 point 4x4 games Halfling consistently changes the rules to his benefit (Chaos guy), brushed it off as him using stuff from 4th edition and didn't care Consistently won a solid amount of my games due to my meched up army (not a netlist, I just thought the tanks and such were cool) Get constantly tabled by Halfing, thought I was just not good at the game Go online to learn some Tau strategy and tactics, leaming how LoS works, how to use Skimmers to wall off assault routes, using Jet packs to jump in and out of cover, etc Still get beaten to death, only by Halfling, who uncannily manages to be always assaulting Figure I must not know enough about assaults, go re-read the section on assaults thoroughly, find out Halfling was doing them wrong Assume he is just confused due to the edtion change Halfling's P9(101 KB and keep things in the a good idea He consistently breaks the rules and gets told no, offered replays on his turn when his strategies hinge upon breaking the rules >Pouts when told he cant assault my skimmers, slide models around to the back of said skimmer >Pouts when told he should switch to the newer Chaos codex, even when we buy it for him >Pouts, pouts, pouts Calls me a rules-lawyer, tells me by using skimmers and Kroot to deny assault I'm min-maxing States he isnt going to keep playing 40k and takes a hiatus from the game, which effectively shuts down the whole group because his house has a the table we use, the terain we all built together and is the middle-way between the players of the group (as well as the fact that him and his brother are half our group). o represent rivers and mountains, sofas to chill on, a painting area, the works, a secondary table for 4x4) pay out of pocket for materials to build a new table, clear room Doesnt really matter, because my house is a half hour out of the way for the two remaining players, and Halfing's brother isnt coming allone rRoll with it, recruit my brother, he starts up an Eldar force. pants like s--- and doesnt understand much but he is leaming o get the WHOLE Halfling's friend 01/13/12/Fri)17 43 No.1 >Halfling shows up with a list that was literally just two winged lash princes, some Termies in a Raider, a fuckton of Oblits, and the rest of the list filled with meched up Plague Manines This was during a time that all af our lists were built primarily from fluft, with no attempt at min/maxing >We had no idea what we were up against >Play one game against a Marine player, draw, have fun play a game against Halfling on the big table and holy f--- what am I dealing with. Lash princes first turn assaulting my Broadsides from across the map with Lash. >Manage to gun it down next turn, but the other advances, hiding behind a Rhino that is fully obscuring the model (he used a terminator as proxy) Game is a slaughter, as I can't remove Plague Maines who go to ground in cover from the objective, and the Daemon Prince cannot be shot while in assault so just eats every unit I have. We end up tying by objectives, with a lone Fire Warrior securing my objective and a relatively healthy group of Plague y so he can hide their bulk behind Rh nos until they reach their near o al assault ange >M he llo ng weeks, he starts bending he rules in silly ways he refuses to use normal aer on Pn ce models, l stead us ng Ter ators and stating at s a conver o Inevitably all the players begin to min/max to keep up, and players stop having fun, two players stop playing and my brother stops, leaving me, Halfing, and his brother sm Watching Normal looking guy with Guard vs bloated neckbeard Dual Lash Prince Chaos Long Story Short, it's a very close game, need to count VP Guard player wins The Neckbeard howls and i mean literally howls with rage, he then starts yelling and goes crimson claiming the store staf hate him, before beginning to s-- and running out of the store with his carry case Halfling's friend 01/13/12(ri)18:02 No.17532293 團! get the worst of it being Tau...while the Marines could simply take the TH/SS Termies and put up a fightI have no way of delending against assault except for a Kroot Castle 뇌 finally cave and build a min axed static Tau list, and the game literally becomes just my shooting phase since no one can effectively assault a proper Kroot Castle the >He does stupid s--- like changing agreed upon rules (he once insisted his unit could hide in range of an objective in a castle that we all agreed at the beginning of the night was impassable terrain that could not be entered. Bitched that his entire plan revolved around doing so, and that t wasnt fair that we wouldnt let him, despite multiple times explaining this to him pre-game). I can tell some of the more infuriating stories if you'd like He switches be actually After the most infuriating game I have ever played, ever, I quit the group, citing increased prices and GW's idiotic customer policies as the reason, and entrust all my Tau s--- to Halfling's brother, who wanted to try out Tau 뇌 feel like it is my fault for bnngng minn axing into the group to begin with when all I ever did was look up common tactics, battlere ots, etc and app y what I learned. Halfli group among friends >Ater a similar story (I'l tell it id you want), he ruins a whole campaign for everyone, and is a total bitch in another. inally realize that the 40k clusterfuck wasnt me but instead was the viral f------ influence of Halfling still have no idea how to confront this without him becoming a passive-aggressive little bitch and having to deal with him whenever I hang out with my d thit up the DnD story At So Ive begun p and not just him Halfling's friend 01 le 1326496337 ipg-(89 KB, 59Tx926, no idea dog jpg) start this off with this: I had no experience with DnD, or PnP at all before this group. I had played quest threads in /tg/ and heard stories, but never actually DM'd or played and actual game. figured that this was supposed to play like the game (was very confused about why there were rules for Trainers using weapons like swords and staffs and bows), and gave them time to look at the rules, saying I would be running a standard "group adventure", with them playing aspining guess I should introduce the party.. which is difficult. I, being an idiot, allowed players to drop in and out at whim and thus had trouble keeping them all in place. I'll introduce all players who came in later at a later point, and start with the starting group pretty much with the one thing a group of college students all have in common; we grew up with Pokemon. So off t rainers, collectors, etc.. Almost like the show 1 year after the events of Genl the plot-hooks revolving around the changes between Genl and Genll to the landscape and such, the League, all that jazz First off we have a one-eyed player starting with a Growlithe, he was a psychic aiming towards empath who wanted to grow as a Trainer alongside his Pokemon.. Ill call his player (and since his character uses the namesake) Jay >A Martial Artist that had no clear defined goal besides travel and smoking. He ended up in Kanto out of sheer randomness, and had an Elekid. Due to a friendly joke and his character's backstory, this character will be referred to as The Mexican if need anises >A quiet Psychic who we will call Brion, and who started with the worst possible choice of pokemon, a goddamn Abra. With only teleport, I wasn't sure how he would fight, but he really made up for his lack of pokemon related firepower with utility and little tricks in the military very, very badly. His character played like an anthromorphic Reddit, spamming memes for no reason whatsoever and starting Mudkip (give you three guesses why). I fully expected player who I will call Sir Grunt, a good guy who had lots of social anxiety and wanted t him to be our That Guy, and, in a way, he was. But he was DAMN glorious about it and the only one with character development >Finally, Haifling. F------ Halfling. He introduced his character as "the grandson of Gary Oak... despite Green being still alive in the campaign, and despite me telling him that did not fit in the setting. He played an Ace trainer with a Squitle, and wanted to beat every gym, the League Our story begins in Vinidian City, with the players meeting up with each other while leaving town towards Pallet, to bully an old man into, err, convince Oak to give them Pokedex's to start their journey o elaborate on the challenges, I had Oak explain the three types of combat in my game, Official (meaning gym battles and such, where it was Pokemon vs Pokemon, trainers could direct or use items only) The players head down, beat a challenge from Oak (my tutorial to Pokemon combat) and went Dojo (used by most Martial Artists, pokemon and trainers fought pokemon in trainers until and agreed outcome was decided, normally unconsciousness of trainer or pokemon) and Street (no rules, no limits) To me, this was an easy way of keeping people from gutting gym leaders but not breaking immersion >Each player won their challenge, though Brion was most interesting... he kept baiting tackles, water guns, and such into lab equipment with Teleport until Oak gave up to save his office >Sadly, I realized Brion would become a utility issue, as, instead of making them run into their first glimpse of Rockets on the way up from Pallet, he teleported them back to Viridian attempted to circumvent this by leading them to explore the south of Viridian. I did this by placing the Old Man from the games, lying in the northern road, bitching about not having his coffee yet and telling them he would call the police if they crossed his yard. While Jay inquired with his wife, who said that best >By curbstomping the Old Man in the testicles and marching past, not giving a single f---. The party followed after 121Fri) 工edt ty, I should add at this point, that despite usng the Dr Mr Stark rules. I added a esque Luck into the game. The idea is that Pokemon protagonists are retard and I wanted to keep the game sorta light-hearted. If players ran into a DO NOT WANT scenario, they could burn luck >A fight through Viridian forest ended them in Pewter. Most of the trip was not memorable, save for the fact that they leamed tier 2 moves (Abra got confusion, etc.) and Brion caused a In Pewter, Halfing and Brion kicked the s--- of Brock, with Jay narrowly losing. The Mexican couldn't get Brock to come at him, so skipped out of the gym, and Sir Grunt started his career as the worst trainer in existence by failing in two rounds due to critical hits and failures The Mexican and Sir Grunt go south to look for Pokemon, see Rocket members. Most people from Kanto know about Rocket from the Saffron take over (common knowledge), so Sir Grunt wants to do something, but his Mudkip is injured and The Mexican has no idea what is going on et members disappear into They go to check out the museum, and notice some shady activity, and sniff out that Rockets have been doing s--- around here the only right thing to do would be to break in and find out what is going on. The Mexican gets the party while Sir Grunt goes solo through some doors through to the labs, apparently he has a serious vendetta against them in through VENTS Sir Grunt uses fists and guile and Mudkip to knock out a Rocket and steal the unform. >Manages to start taking down Rockets Rest of the party sneaks around, quick attacking Rocket members into unconsciousness and cacooning them with string attacks >Eventually, the party nearly knocks him out with a sneak attack Elekkid sneak attack, bums luck to halve the damage and stay up out Rockets Eventually reach a room with heaps upon heaps of dead Magikarp, and erratic, encrypted notes. Anything not encrypted mentions that the research has caused a lot of the subjects to die from heart attacks, try to kill everything in sight, or otherwise die violent The Mexican stumbles on and egg that is a solid dark blue with black stripes. Decides that, all things considered, he'd take it with him >Finally get to the middle of the base, where they note a whole group of Rockets driving off. A panel on the wall is counting down >Party rushes out in time to see the museum engulfed in flames Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fri) The party goes through Mount Moon... well, part of the party, sort of. Brion and Sir Grunt's players were absent, so it was implied by Brion and Sir Grunt that they hiked u Character was another Ace Trainer, who had a penchant for hunting down strong pokemon, not letting them escape..period. He used a Dratini, who was an absolute monster early on, and was chasing an Onix throughout the mountain. Said Onix was a significantly high level for the party, and this character Il call him Mr. Badass) was chasing the f----- down himself, while being apparently outgunned They chase around the Onix in the cave, and Mr. Badass catches the f----- the t getting hunted Cerulean city passes on uneventfully, save for making Halfling rage on Nugget Bridge.relatively easy fights with annoying tactics >Vermillion had Jay fighting Surge, who I played up to be a badass and kind of a d---. He constantly talked down to the characters, didn't lose easily, and gave zero f---- about everything Jay won narrowly, with type advantage against a Magnamite The party also n estigated a burnt out lighthouse which happened to nest Moitres. Much Luck was bumed, and they barely escaped with Mr. Badass hold ng弍off and then spide an ng down the collapsing lighthouse with a Kak na who a Rocket member. No trial, straight to jail, and the players only got him out due to luck and because Surge put in a good word (wanting to fight him). It was at this point made canon that Gym Leaders are above the law >When Haifling fought him, he beat him pretty soundly Rest of the party couldn't handle him, Sir Grunt failing spectacularly once again Surge and Party later take down a Rocket base, introducing the first BBEG who was leagues above them and fought Surge to a standstill in a collapsing Rocket base. Surge wasnt seen again. >Sir Reginald Percy Burkehart the Fith, as I will call him, joined the party soon after this, a Ranger trying to out Rocket corruption in Kanto He was a pretty c >As they passed by Saffron, Jay had a run in with a young woman (the Copycat) who decided to tag along with him. She copied literally action he took, annoying him to all hell, and her team of six dittos made her even more of a pain The party progressed a while, Sighting Rockets in Lavender, dealing with ghosts, and other such nonsense. They had a few unfortunate run-ins with the BBEG, but nothing they couldn't get out Cerulean city gym was nearly leveled when Halfling and Mr. Badass fought Enika's tag team. Having a Snorlax smash a pokemon through the side of a building will do that >Lavender town had an interesting setup for the gym, forcing them to navigate deathtraps as a tag team to actually meet the leader, who didn't bat an eye at their injuries. Jay and the Copycat split up here, her opening up a badge case, putting her final badge in, and heading off to the Pokemon League without >Halfing and Mr. Badass beat the gym, barely coming out alive from some of the traps The Mexican and Sir Grunt failed miserably. Afterwards, in the only show of character development in the whole campaign, Sir Grunt sat down with his Marshtomp and apologized to it, for letting it down time after time. He resolved to do better, for both of their sakes, and Il be damned if he didn't improve
KB □I guess this will be a That Guy thread Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fn)17:28 No 17531839 So gather around tg/, for my tales of 40k. A story of my start to finish, and how it was wrecked by That Guy, a good friend who becomes a complete bitch in every traditional game I have ever played with him. He will be henceforth referred to as Halfing >Get into 40k with a bunch of friends from high school, on the dawn of 5th edition Their armies are: Space Marines, Space Marines, Chaos Space Manines, Space Marines, and Necrons that were never, ever used because I liked the victory by superior technology aspect they had, and the army was recommended by another player irst games are played, relatively enjoyable, getting the hang of the army in small, 500-1000 point 4x4 games Halfling consistently changes the rules to his benefit (Chaos guy), brushed it off as him using stuff from 4th edition and didn't care Consistently won a solid amount of my games due to my meched up army (not a netlist, I just thought the tanks and such were cool) Get constantly tabled by Halfing, thought I was just not good at the game Go online to learn some Tau strategy and tactics, leaming how LoS works, how to use Skimmers to wall off assault routes, using Jet packs to jump in and out of cover, etc Still get beaten to death, only by Halfling, who uncannily manages to be always assaulting Figure I must not know enough about assaults, go re-read the section on assaults thoroughly, find out Halfling was doing them wrong Assume he is just confused due to the edtion change Halfling's P9(101 KB and keep things in the a good idea He consistently breaks the rules and gets told no, offered replays on his turn when his strategies hinge upon breaking the rules >Pouts when told he cant assault my skimmers, slide models around to the back of said skimmer >Pouts when told he should switch to the newer Chaos codex, even when we buy it for him >Pouts, pouts, pouts Calls me a rules-lawyer, tells me by using skimmers and Kroot to deny assault I'm min-maxing States he isnt going to keep playing 40k and takes a hiatus from the game, which effectively shuts down the whole group because his house has a the table we use, the terain we all built together and is the middle-way between the players of the group (as well as the fact that him and his brother are half our group). o represent rivers and mountains, sofas to chill on, a painting area, the works, a secondary table for 4x4) pay out of pocket for materials to build a new table, clear room Doesnt really matter, because my house is a half hour out of the way for the two remaining players, and Halfing's brother isnt coming allone rRoll with it, recruit my brother, he starts up an Eldar force. pants like s--- and doesnt understand much but he is leaming o get the WHOLE Halfling's friend 01/13/12/Fri)17 43 No.1 >Halfling shows up with a list that was literally just two winged lash princes, some Termies in a Raider, a fuckton of Oblits, and the rest of the list filled with meched up Plague Manines This was during a time that all af our lists were built primarily from fluft, with no attempt at min/maxing >We had no idea what we were up against >Play one game against a Marine player, draw, have fun play a game against Halfling on the big table and holy f--- what am I dealing with. Lash princes first turn assaulting my Broadsides from across the map with Lash. >Manage to gun it down next turn, but the other advances, hiding behind a Rhino that is fully obscuring the model (he used a terminator as proxy) Game is a slaughter, as I can't remove Plague Maines who go to ground in cover from the objective, and the Daemon Prince cannot be shot while in assault so just eats every unit I have. We end up tying by objectives, with a lone Fire Warrior securing my objective and a relatively healthy group of Plague y so he can hide their bulk behind Rh nos until they reach their near o al assault ange >M he llo ng weeks, he starts bending he rules in silly ways he refuses to use normal aer on Pn ce models, l stead us ng Ter ators and stating at s a conver o Inevitably all the players begin to min/max to keep up, and players stop having fun, two players stop playing and my brother stops, leaving me, Halfing, and his brother sm Watching Normal looking guy with Guard vs bloated neckbeard Dual Lash Prince Chaos Long Story Short, it's a very close game, need to count VP Guard player wins The Neckbeard howls and i mean literally howls with rage, he then starts yelling and goes crimson claiming the store staf hate him, before beginning to s-- and running out of the store with his carry case Halfling's friend 01/13/12(ri)18:02 No.17532293 團! get the worst of it being Tau...while the Marines could simply take the TH/SS Termies and put up a fightI have no way of delending against assault except for a Kroot Castle 뇌 finally cave and build a min axed static Tau list, and the game literally becomes just my shooting phase since no one can effectively assault a proper Kroot Castle the >He does stupid s--- like changing agreed upon rules (he once insisted his unit could hide in range of an objective in a castle that we all agreed at the beginning of the night was impassable terrain that could not be entered. Bitched that his entire plan revolved around doing so, and that t wasnt fair that we wouldnt let him, despite multiple times explaining this to him pre-game). I can tell some of the more infuriating stories if you'd like He switches be actually After the most infuriating game I have ever played, ever, I quit the group, citing increased prices and GW's idiotic customer policies as the reason, and entrust all my Tau s--- to Halfling's brother, who wanted to try out Tau 뇌 feel like it is my fault for bnngng minn axing into the group to begin with when all I ever did was look up common tactics, battlere ots, etc and app y what I learned. Halfli group among friends >Ater a similar story (I'l tell it id you want), he ruins a whole campaign for everyone, and is a total bitch in another. inally realize that the 40k clusterfuck wasnt me but instead was the viral f------ influence of Halfling still have no idea how to confront this without him becoming a passive-aggressive little bitch and having to deal with him whenever I hang out with my d thit up the DnD story At So Ive begun p and not just him Halfling's friend 01 le 1326496337 ipg-(89 KB, 59Tx926, no idea dog jpg) start this off with this: I had no experience with DnD, or PnP at all before this group. I had played quest threads in /tg/ and heard stories, but never actually DM'd or played and actual game. figured that this was supposed to play like the game (was very confused about why there were rules for Trainers using weapons like swords and staffs and bows), and gave them time to look at the rules, saying I would be running a standard "group adventure", with them playing aspining guess I should introduce the party.. which is difficult. I, being an idiot, allowed players to drop in and out at whim and thus had trouble keeping them all in place. I'll introduce all players who came in later at a later point, and start with the starting group pretty much with the one thing a group of college students all have in common; we grew up with Pokemon. So off t rainers, collectors, etc.. Almost like the show 1 year after the events of Genl the plot-hooks revolving around the changes between Genl and Genll to the landscape and such, the League, all that jazz First off we have a one-eyed player starting with a Growlithe, he was a psychic aiming towards empath who wanted to grow as a Trainer alongside his Pokemon.. Ill call his player (and since his character uses the namesake) Jay >A Martial Artist that had no clear defined goal besides travel and smoking. He ended up in Kanto out of sheer randomness, and had an Elekid. Due to a friendly joke and his character's backstory, this character will be referred to as The Mexican if need anises >A quiet Psychic who we will call Brion, and who started with the worst possible choice of pokemon, a goddamn Abra. With only teleport, I wasn't sure how he would fight, but he really made up for his lack of pokemon related firepower with utility and little tricks in the military very, very badly. His character played like an anthromorphic Reddit, spamming memes for no reason whatsoever and starting Mudkip (give you three guesses why). I fully expected player who I will call Sir Grunt, a good guy who had lots of social anxiety and wanted t him to be our That Guy, and, in a way, he was. But he was DAMN glorious about it and the only one with character development >Finally, Haifling. F------ Halfling. He introduced his character as "the grandson of Gary Oak... despite Green being still alive in the campaign, and despite me telling him that did not fit in the setting. He played an Ace trainer with a Squitle, and wanted to beat every gym, the League Our story begins in Vinidian City, with the players meeting up with each other while leaving town towards Pallet, to bully an old man into, err, convince Oak to give them Pokedex's to start their journey o elaborate on the challenges, I had Oak explain the three types of combat in my game, Official (meaning gym battles and such, where it was Pokemon vs Pokemon, trainers could direct or use items only) The players head down, beat a challenge from Oak (my tutorial to Pokemon combat) and went Dojo (used by most Martial Artists, pokemon and trainers fought pokemon in trainers until and agreed outcome was decided, normally unconsciousness of trainer or pokemon) and Street (no rules, no limits) To me, this was an easy way of keeping people from gutting gym leaders but not breaking immersion >Each player won their challenge, though Brion was most interesting... he kept baiting tackles, water guns, and such into lab equipment with Teleport until Oak gave up to save his office >Sadly, I realized Brion would become a utility issue, as, instead of making them run into their first glimpse of Rockets on the way up from Pallet, he teleported them back to Viridian attempted to circumvent this by leading them to explore the south of Viridian. I did this by placing the Old Man from the games, lying in the northern road, bitching about not having his coffee yet and telling them he would call the police if they crossed his yard. While Jay inquired with his wife, who said that best >By curbstomping the Old Man in the testicles and marching past, not giving a single f---. The party followed after 121Fri) 工edt ty, I should add at this point, that despite usng the Dr Mr Stark rules. I added a esque Luck into the game. The idea is that Pokemon protagonists are retard and I wanted to keep the game sorta light-hearted. If players ran into a DO NOT WANT scenario, they could burn luck >A fight through Viridian forest ended them in Pewter. Most of the trip was not memorable, save for the fact that they leamed tier 2 moves (Abra got confusion, etc.) and Brion caused a In Pewter, Halfing and Brion kicked the s--- of Brock, with Jay narrowly losing. The Mexican couldn't get Brock to come at him, so skipped out of the gym, and Sir Grunt started his career as the worst trainer in existence by failing in two rounds due to critical hits and failures The Mexican and Sir Grunt go south to look for Pokemon, see Rocket members. Most people from Kanto know about Rocket from the Saffron take over (common knowledge), so Sir Grunt wants to do something, but his Mudkip is injured and The Mexican has no idea what is going on et members disappear into They go to check out the museum, and notice some shady activity, and sniff out that Rockets have been doing s--- around here the only right thing to do would be to break in and find out what is going on. The Mexican gets the party while Sir Grunt goes solo through some doors through to the labs, apparently he has a serious vendetta against them in through VENTS Sir Grunt uses fists and guile and Mudkip to knock out a Rocket and steal the unform. >Manages to start taking down Rockets Rest of the party sneaks around, quick attacking Rocket members into unconsciousness and cacooning them with string attacks >Eventually, the party nearly knocks him out with a sneak attack Elekkid sneak attack, bums luck to halve the damage and stay up out Rockets Eventually reach a room with heaps upon heaps of dead Magikarp, and erratic, encrypted notes. Anything not encrypted mentions that the research has caused a lot of the subjects to die from heart attacks, try to kill everything in sight, or otherwise die violent The Mexican stumbles on and egg that is a solid dark blue with black stripes. Decides that, all things considered, he'd take it with him >Finally get to the middle of the base, where they note a whole group of Rockets driving off. A panel on the wall is counting down >Party rushes out in time to see the museum engulfed in flames Halfling's friend 01/13/12(Fri) The party goes through Mount Moon... well, part of the party, sort of. Brion and Sir Grunt's players were absent, so it was implied by Brion and Sir Grunt that they hiked u Character was another Ace Trainer, who had a penchant for hunting down strong pokemon, not letting them escape..period. He used a Dratini, who was an absolute monster early on, and was chasing an Onix throughout the mountain. Said Onix was a significantly high level for the party, and this character Il call him Mr. Badass) was chasing the f----- down himself, while being apparently outgunned They chase around the Onix in the cave, and Mr. Badass catches the f----- the t getting hunted Cerulean city passes on uneventfully, save for making Halfling rage on Nugget Bridge.relatively easy fights with annoying tactics >Vermillion had Jay fighting Surge, who I played up to be a badass and kind of a d---. He constantly talked down to the characters, didn't lose easily, and gave zero f---- about everything Jay won narrowly, with type advantage against a Magnamite The party also n estigated a burnt out lighthouse which happened to nest Moitres. Much Luck was bumed, and they barely escaped with Mr. Badass hold ng弍off and then spide an ng down the collapsing lighthouse with a Kak na who a Rocket member. No trial, straight to jail, and the players only got him out due to luck and because Surge put in a good word (wanting to fight him). It was at this point made canon that Gym Leaders are above the law >When Haifling fought him, he beat him pretty soundly Rest of the party couldn't handle him, Sir Grunt failing spectacularly once again Surge and Party later take down a Rocket base, introducing the first BBEG who was leagues above them and fought Surge to a standstill in a collapsing Rocket base. Surge wasnt seen again. >Sir Reginald Percy Burkehart the Fith, as I will call him, joined the party soon after this, a Ranger trying to out Rocket corruption in Kanto He was a pretty c >As they passed by Saffron, Jay had a run in with a young woman (the Copycat) who decided to tag along with him. She copied literally action he took, annoying him to all hell, and her team of six dittos made her even more of a pain The party progressed a while, Sighting Rockets in Lavender, dealing with ghosts, and other such nonsense. They had a few unfortunate run-ins with the BBEG, but nothing they couldn't get out Cerulean city gym was nearly leveled when Halfling and Mr. Badass fought Enika's tag team. Having a Snorlax smash a pokemon through the side of a building will do that >Lavender town had an interesting setup for the gym, forcing them to navigate deathtraps as a tag team to actually meet the leader, who didn't bat an eye at their injuries. Jay and the Copycat split up here, her opening up a badge case, putting her final badge in, and heading off to the Pokemon League without >Halfing and Mr. Badass beat the gym, barely coming out alive from some of the traps The Mexican and Sir Grunt failed miserably. Afterwards, in the only show of character development in the whole campaign, Sir Grunt sat down with his Marshtomp and apologized to it, for letting it down time after time. He resolved to do better, for both of their sakes, and Il be damned if he didn't improve

/tg/
/tg/ 4chan 8chan greentext traditional games

sounds like medievil

Anonymous 03/19/10 (Fri)02:08 No.8657968 P> >Our tale starts in a thread about character concepts that individual fa/tg/uys have always wanted to play, with this The stereotypical paladin archetype, combined with "Ancient hero from the past who swore to rise from the grave when his home country needed him the most," but is actually a bard that was dressed up for a play when the adventure started and got swept into the heroic world-saving shtick. I would have to get the DM to work with me on it, and I know it would never happen, simply because my DM sucks at the deception game. All it would require is a simple description of some oddly- colored armor and a Knowledge(History) check with a ridiculously low DC to get started Character motivation for not coming clean would be "Oh god, oh god, they think I'm really Ancient Hero and theyre bigger and stronger and scarier than I am and would probably tear me apart if I told them the truth and OH GOD, AN ORC, GOTTA LOOK HEROIC SO THEY DONT GET SUSPICIOUS 「Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:09 No.8657983 >It's followed by this gem, posted by the first person to be interested in the idea I can see this starting out hilariously All right, gentlemen. The play's opening night is next week. That means we have a week to get people interested in it, so we're not just performing for an empty house. Now, you guys are going t dress up like thieves and pretend to mug Erria in the town square, who's going to be dressed up like an old lady. I'll throw down a quick illusion of a portal and a smokebomb and show up and stop you guys, dressed up as Ancient Hero. After the fake battle, I'll proclaim that Ill be back to save the country when it needs me most, fall down, and succumb to the wounds you guys put on me. Then we'll all get up, bow, and say that the real performance will be at the opera house. So! Let's do this thin Actors mug old-lady-actor, PCs show up and start killing the actors, bard pops out of portal and fails to recognize the fact that the PCs aren't part of the performance. Actors are killed, bard realizes falters for a second, then uses his acting prowess to keep things from getting awkward "Ah... thank you, adventurers. Your help is greatly appreciated. What? This armor? Ah... I see you recognize me. Y-yes, I am Ancient Hero Name Here. You... you want me to help you thwart the BBEG's plan? And he is threatening to destroy the world? Ah.. . that is... ahem.. yes, of course I will help you. What other choice do I have?" Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:10 No.8657998 >The first half of the first ending is posted here Can you imagine the Big Reveal? The PCs have kicked down the door of the BBEG's hideout, slaughtered their way through miles of monsters, had h nd conversations from and with the paladin, finally broken into the inner sanctum of the villain and had a battle that not only destroyed the BBEG's fortress, but erased entire chunks of the fabric of space and time, and the unthinkable happens. The paladin is dealt a mortal blow. He's out of magic, the wound is bleeding fast, and he's drifting in and out of consciousness as the battle rages on. No one in the group red the paladin had it covered. The heroes struggle to beat down the villain and finally succeed, then rush to the side of the fallen paladin, trying to pas al check to save him G-gentlemen.. no. Heroes. I have a- AH! I have a confession to make. Tears gathering in the paladin's eyes, struggling to come to terms with death. "IH'm just an actor..." 9D Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:11 No.8658019 >The second half is followed up by another poster "No, no, they say, "you're not, you're a hero, a hero of legends!" The Bard coughs, blood coming up, he doesn't have much time left The-then one last thing... please.. H must know how it ends... please t-tell me how the play ends..." "And the all live happily ever after." says the Hero, craddling the broken bard The bard laughs weakly, "Heh... terrible writing, I should seen it coming..." He manages a smile, as the light fades from his eyes and his eyelids close for the last time The curtain fall d the party appla Anonymous 03/19/10 (Fri)02 A second possible ending is proposed, the first half of which is as follows Alternately, the finale approaches. The Bard has done well at keeping his appearance up, and has done his best to play the part of the Paladin Now, this wasn't e and this is just the greatest act And so the He isn't a Paladin, and lacks the true abilities of one. He mak tough, pretending to Smite evil on foes that are already weakened by just ing out Smite evil while ing them off, Making enough of a ruckus to make the party believe he is turning the dead, "detecting evil" by just flat out making good gue about peoples alignments. He is an actor afterall le chapter draws near. The party has fought their way through the dungeon, and now face off against the BBEG. Things are going poorly, and the party doesrn em like it will be successful. The BBEG looms over a fallen ally, preparing t the What can the Bard do? not r When the go down ust an actor in a fak But he is an actor, and he knows what he mus The show must go can behind the BBEG, sword sed hih, and shouts from the of his lun ings SMITE EVIL! of a howl of pain! The BBEG has been gravely wounded, but how? The Bard i Paladin, how could this be Through his actions, through his belief in keeping up the act of all that is good and true, the Bard transformed, became the Paladin he had pretended to be. He always was the ancient hero reincarnated, he had just never kno wn, never believed 「Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:13 No.8658046 >The second half of this ending comes up The strange armor he had worn all this time, not nearly as functional as an actual suit of platemail but still light enough for him to move around in, is replaced. Instead of being covered in the dust and muck that had accumulated over time, it gleamed with a divine light The longsword, equally feeble as his armor but functioning as a rapier, shown true. Reflecting light that could not have a source in the villain's dark inner sanctum, and etched with the markings of Pelor, Heironyous, St. Cuthbert, and more that the actor could not identify, it stood as a lone beacon that fought against the ambient darkness of the room The actor, the coward, the pretender, the fraud. They were no more. All that remained of the man that began this journey was the hope for a better future, the light of Good, and the strength to help the helpless The Paladin placed a foot upon the chest of the man he struck down, and pointed his blade at his throat Yield, villain. I am the Knight of Burgundymoor."
Anonymous 03/19/10 (Fri)02:08 No.8657968 P> >Our tale starts in a thread about character concepts that individual fa/tg/uys have always wanted to play, with this The stereotypical paladin archetype, combined with "Ancient hero from the past who swore to rise from the grave when his home country needed him the most," but is actually a bard that was dressed up for a play when the adventure started and got swept into the heroic world-saving shtick. I would have to get the DM to work with me on it, and I know it would never happen, simply because my DM sucks at the deception game. All it would require is a simple description of some oddly- colored armor and a Knowledge(History) check with a ridiculously low DC to get started Character motivation for not coming clean would be "Oh god, oh god, they think I'm really Ancient Hero and theyre bigger and stronger and scarier than I am and would probably tear me apart if I told them the truth and OH GOD, AN ORC, GOTTA LOOK HEROIC SO THEY DONT GET SUSPICIOUS 「Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:09 No.8657983 >It's followed by this gem, posted by the first person to be interested in the idea I can see this starting out hilariously All right, gentlemen. The play's opening night is next week. That means we have a week to get people interested in it, so we're not just performing for an empty house. Now, you guys are going t dress up like thieves and pretend to mug Erria in the town square, who's going to be dressed up like an old lady. I'll throw down a quick illusion of a portal and a smokebomb and show up and stop you guys, dressed up as Ancient Hero. After the fake battle, I'll proclaim that Ill be back to save the country when it needs me most, fall down, and succumb to the wounds you guys put on me. Then we'll all get up, bow, and say that the real performance will be at the opera house. So! Let's do this thin Actors mug old-lady-actor, PCs show up and start killing the actors, bard pops out of portal and fails to recognize the fact that the PCs aren't part of the performance. Actors are killed, bard realizes falters for a second, then uses his acting prowess to keep things from getting awkward "Ah... thank you, adventurers. Your help is greatly appreciated. What? This armor? Ah... I see you recognize me. Y-yes, I am Ancient Hero Name Here. You... you want me to help you thwart the BBEG's plan? And he is threatening to destroy the world? Ah.. . that is... ahem.. yes, of course I will help you. What other choice do I have?" Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:10 No.8657998 >The first half of the first ending is posted here Can you imagine the Big Reveal? The PCs have kicked down the door of the BBEG's hideout, slaughtered their way through miles of monsters, had h nd conversations from and with the paladin, finally broken into the inner sanctum of the villain and had a battle that not only destroyed the BBEG's fortress, but erased entire chunks of the fabric of space and time, and the unthinkable happens. The paladin is dealt a mortal blow. He's out of magic, the wound is bleeding fast, and he's drifting in and out of consciousness as the battle rages on. No one in the group red the paladin had it covered. The heroes struggle to beat down the villain and finally succeed, then rush to the side of the fallen paladin, trying to pas al check to save him G-gentlemen.. no. Heroes. I have a- AH! I have a confession to make. Tears gathering in the paladin's eyes, struggling to come to terms with death. "IH'm just an actor..." 9D Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:11 No.8658019 >The second half is followed up by another poster "No, no, they say, "you're not, you're a hero, a hero of legends!" The Bard coughs, blood coming up, he doesn't have much time left The-then one last thing... please.. H must know how it ends... please t-tell me how the play ends..." "And the all live happily ever after." says the Hero, craddling the broken bard The bard laughs weakly, "Heh... terrible writing, I should seen it coming..." He manages a smile, as the light fades from his eyes and his eyelids close for the last time The curtain fall d the party appla Anonymous 03/19/10 (Fri)02 A second possible ending is proposed, the first half of which is as follows Alternately, the finale approaches. The Bard has done well at keeping his appearance up, and has done his best to play the part of the Paladin Now, this wasn't e and this is just the greatest act And so the He isn't a Paladin, and lacks the true abilities of one. He mak tough, pretending to Smite evil on foes that are already weakened by just ing out Smite evil while ing them off, Making enough of a ruckus to make the party believe he is turning the dead, "detecting evil" by just flat out making good gue about peoples alignments. He is an actor afterall le chapter draws near. The party has fought their way through the dungeon, and now face off against the BBEG. Things are going poorly, and the party doesrn em like it will be successful. The BBEG looms over a fallen ally, preparing t the What can the Bard do? not r When the go down ust an actor in a fak But he is an actor, and he knows what he mus The show must go can behind the BBEG, sword sed hih, and shouts from the of his lun ings SMITE EVIL! of a howl of pain! The BBEG has been gravely wounded, but how? The Bard i Paladin, how could this be Through his actions, through his belief in keeping up the act of all that is good and true, the Bard transformed, became the Paladin he had pretended to be. He always was the ancient hero reincarnated, he had just never kno wn, never believed 「Anonymous 03/19/10(Fri)02:13 No.8658046 >The second half of this ending comes up The strange armor he had worn all this time, not nearly as functional as an actual suit of platemail but still light enough for him to move around in, is replaced. Instead of being covered in the dust and muck that had accumulated over time, it gleamed with a divine light The longsword, equally feeble as his armor but functioning as a rapier, shown true. Reflecting light that could not have a source in the villain's dark inner sanctum, and etched with the markings of Pelor, Heironyous, St. Cuthbert, and more that the actor could not identify, it stood as a lone beacon that fought against the ambient darkness of the room The actor, the coward, the pretender, the fraud. They were no more. All that remained of the man that began this journey was the hope for a better future, the light of Good, and the strength to help the helpless The Paladin placed a foot upon the chest of the man he struck down, and pointed his blade at his throat Yield, villain. I am the Knight of Burgundymoor."

/tg/
4chan 8chan /tg/ greentext traditional games

I really want to do this. I'd play legend of the 5 rings myself if i could do this

Anonymous 07/02/11 (Sat)09:08 No.15453249 Heavy politics/intriuge game. >No one knows anyone elses clan to start. >Meeting at a Dinner held by the Crane Diyamo >Play one armed Crab Clan ex-wall warrior who belives that diplomacy is actually of worth, and that 'a battle with words is sometimes as vital as a battle with weapons' after a long back story involving him losing his arm and his squad to the owlands after insulting a high ranking Crane who was going to give them reinforcements...but didn't after the slight >Trying to learn diplomacy and prove that the Crab clan arn't just brutes >Play him as Uncle Iroh from A:tla, cheerful, maybe a tiny bit informal, but polite and charming. >All sitting around talking at the dinner Everyone thinks Im Crane because I'm so polite and 95% of the people there are Crane. >Crab and Crane currently at Cold War >A few unfriendly insults about the Crab beina uncouth go around. >Crane "I bet 5 Koku a Crab could not even sit around the table with us and have a polite meal!" Amused smile: I'll take that bet." >He gets slightly drunk as the meal goes on and really starts slagging off the Crab. >Make a very dry comment insulting both clans subtly for fighting amongst themselves when there are more important things >Crane gives me a w-- look for insulting our' clan; infront of the Diyamo I'm sure you don't mean that >Look at him for a moment, then put down my noodle bowl and smile "How about a game of Go, to settle the time before desert my friend?" >He looks unsure, but agrees...obviously now not sure about me >We do Go, I school him at it due to some lucky rolls, he gets annoyed and challenged me to a Haiku contest. Manage to make some more lucky rolls, and OOC am a master at Improv Haiku. Ends with "Little Crane standing in pond Unknowing to who you speak Pecking wildly at the water" >Crane gets sick of this >Challenges me to a duel infront of everyone. >"You of course may choose the weapon 'good Sir >No, my friend, as it is your Duel, you may choose the weapons. I do not mind. >Try to talk him out of it, but he won't listen because Cranes-Duellan >He gets even more angry at how little of a f--- I seem to give and looks like he's about to try to kill me in the ring >Diyamo steps in and says that there isn't going to be any killing at this dinner, so its only first to blood. >l agree, bowing to the wisdom of the Diyamo >He chooses Katana, naturally.. I'm a terrible duellist >But I'm hard as f--- >Bow to him as we get into the ring, "I wish you good luck, although for one who claims to have so sturdy an honour...it seems you protect it as glass, even against the friendliest of gibes' >Crane has honour themed flaws... really goes for me after that one Tank the 'accidentally' lethal attack the Crane tries to land on me Massive gaping wound along my chest that really hurt my character Didn't even try to hit him "Is your honour satisfied now?' >Step out the Ring without even trying to fight back, bandage wound at table; pick up my sake with my bloodied hand and continue to make polite conversation with the guests, having not taken enough damage to really be badly effected, and insisting on not letting this ruin the wonderful dinner that the Diyamo was kind enough to provide >The Diyamo insists I let the medic tend to me, bow to his wishes >"As is your wish, Lord Crane. Thank you for caring so much about my well being." >Model of politeness the entire way through, even with a chest wound >Obviously working hard to maintain decorum and stop the dinner becoming a train wreck >Crane:...Who is this peasant who does not even try to defend his honour!?" >l remove my upper robe so the Crane medic can get to the wound, revealing a lifetimes worth of scarred tissue, claws, bite marks, sword cuts and other damage, I am obviously a massive warrion. Me: ". am the ambassador for the Crab Clan, and know that my honour and that of my Clan is as sturdy as the wall that I stood upon for the last 10 years; I do not need to hurt you, little Crane, or anyone else here, to prove that to myself. Nor do need to waste breath insulting others, or their clans. I know that I have honour, and that is enough for l. I am here to discuss a peace between our people.. .and hurting you would only have made that more difficult..now, why not come enjoy some of this delicious Sake that your honourable Diyamo has been gracious enough to gift to us?" >Everyone goes quiet and looks at me, except the Diyamo, who knew already...who looks impressed >Diyamo gives Crane 'Son I am disappointed look >Crane player OOC gets a 'OH S---! look 10 seconds silence >Me: " that you owe me 5 Koku *Sip* T also belive
Anonymous 07/02/11 (Sat)09:08 No.15453249 Heavy politics/intriuge game. >No one knows anyone elses clan to start. >Meeting at a Dinner held by the Crane Diyamo >Play one armed Crab Clan ex-wall warrior who belives that diplomacy is actually of worth, and that 'a battle with words is sometimes as vital as a battle with weapons' after a long back story involving him losing his arm and his squad to the owlands after insulting a high ranking Crane who was going to give them reinforcements...but didn't after the slight >Trying to learn diplomacy and prove that the Crab clan arn't just brutes >Play him as Uncle Iroh from A:tla, cheerful, maybe a tiny bit informal, but polite and charming. >All sitting around talking at the dinner Everyone thinks Im Crane because I'm so polite and 95% of the people there are Crane. >Crab and Crane currently at Cold War >A few unfriendly insults about the Crab beina uncouth go around. >Crane "I bet 5 Koku a Crab could not even sit around the table with us and have a polite meal!" Amused smile: I'll take that bet." >He gets slightly drunk as the meal goes on and really starts slagging off the Crab. >Make a very dry comment insulting both clans subtly for fighting amongst themselves when there are more important things >Crane gives me a w-- look for insulting our' clan; infront of the Diyamo I'm sure you don't mean that >Look at him for a moment, then put down my noodle bowl and smile "How about a game of Go, to settle the time before desert my friend?" >He looks unsure, but agrees...obviously now not sure about me >We do Go, I school him at it due to some lucky rolls, he gets annoyed and challenged me to a Haiku contest. Manage to make some more lucky rolls, and OOC am a master at Improv Haiku. Ends with "Little Crane standing in pond Unknowing to who you speak Pecking wildly at the water" >Crane gets sick of this >Challenges me to a duel infront of everyone. >"You of course may choose the weapon 'good Sir >No, my friend, as it is your Duel, you may choose the weapons. I do not mind. >Try to talk him out of it, but he won't listen because Cranes-Duellan >He gets even more angry at how little of a f--- I seem to give and looks like he's about to try to kill me in the ring >Diyamo steps in and says that there isn't going to be any killing at this dinner, so its only first to blood. >l agree, bowing to the wisdom of the Diyamo >He chooses Katana, naturally.. I'm a terrible duellist >But I'm hard as f--- >Bow to him as we get into the ring, "I wish you good luck, although for one who claims to have so sturdy an honour...it seems you protect it as glass, even against the friendliest of gibes' >Crane has honour themed flaws... really goes for me after that one Tank the 'accidentally' lethal attack the Crane tries to land on me Massive gaping wound along my chest that really hurt my character Didn't even try to hit him "Is your honour satisfied now?' >Step out the Ring without even trying to fight back, bandage wound at table; pick up my sake with my bloodied hand and continue to make polite conversation with the guests, having not taken enough damage to really be badly effected, and insisting on not letting this ruin the wonderful dinner that the Diyamo was kind enough to provide >The Diyamo insists I let the medic tend to me, bow to his wishes >"As is your wish, Lord Crane. Thank you for caring so much about my well being." >Model of politeness the entire way through, even with a chest wound >Obviously working hard to maintain decorum and stop the dinner becoming a train wreck >Crane:...Who is this peasant who does not even try to defend his honour!?" >l remove my upper robe so the Crane medic can get to the wound, revealing a lifetimes worth of scarred tissue, claws, bite marks, sword cuts and other damage, I am obviously a massive warrion. Me: ". am the ambassador for the Crab Clan, and know that my honour and that of my Clan is as sturdy as the wall that I stood upon for the last 10 years; I do not need to hurt you, little Crane, or anyone else here, to prove that to myself. Nor do need to waste breath insulting others, or their clans. I know that I have honour, and that is enough for l. I am here to discuss a peace between our people.. .and hurting you would only have made that more difficult..now, why not come enjoy some of this delicious Sake that your honourable Diyamo has been gracious enough to gift to us?" >Everyone goes quiet and looks at me, except the Diyamo, who knew already...who looks impressed >Diyamo gives Crane 'Son I am disappointed look >Crane player OOC gets a 'OH S---! look 10 seconds silence >Me: " that you owe me 5 Koku *Sip* T also belive

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□ Anonymous 06/22/1am 15:23 No19582796 Right now I am sightly amused and helhstly thaekfil Amused because it was a long time since I have had sach a satisfaction seeing somebody mentaly defeated, and thankful because... well, I will tel you later Introduction frst. I am yor average fatguy that for a long time had no chance to play tabletops. I've made a mistake of teling about this an acquaintance of mine that plays computer games a lot, and- apparentiy- wanted to try pen&papers. He said that he could be a GM, and that the cely thing I should do was to find a party Wel, I lve in a big city and even though RPGs are not so popular in my country, I managed to End some people. An old friend Mattherw) that brought his guifriend along Joan), and this old crush of mine (Anme) that-I was shocked-eagerty agreed to pla with us There was one term though-she wanted ber fnend to come and play too, Since he apparently knew a lot about tabletops and agreed to hep DM wth making the story ra And he is the main hero of this story We started playing a few weeks ago, and as soon as be tumed up it trned out that he have at least seen or met every single one of us before. He appeared to be This Guy incaenate-I don't know if there is ach more to say. Helpbd, joyfil, and so on. Helishly charismatic, aed huge-noat, uge-he made friends with every one of us. Even Iwas lad be plays with us we created a team I guess this邰a good adr ce for a the eams play ng th a res DM take one paladin so that he could help he DM keep he party together and story rolng one clenc and one dnud so that you would be able to face anything (and win) a newbie GM codd throw at you. Peter played palacn Mathew got clerc and Joan was dnad-I picked a rogue and Anne took wizard □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fri) 1528 No.19582860 It was the worst. Adventure. Ever. Imean, Ihave played with DMs that din't know bow to throw dices, but thus one somehow managed to commt not only all those intating, basic mustakes, but also much, much more At the very begning weve defeated a powerul necromancer that made the whole cty hide behind its walls", only to be nearly defeated by five goblrs (aces weren't on our sde) a few moments later. Soon it barned out that the plot was heavly ratlroaded, and all those maeneisms taken from vidya games became apparent. I we wacted to tak to somebody from outside the plot the DM sid bh, h---- is not at homel, if we wanted to go to west instead of south we heard "but there is nothing therel Why would you go there? Your characters, knowing that there is no sense in going there, turn south and I guess we should have got the message at the begrring Joan found a set of leather armorr that tuned out to be nhabited by a ghost The ghost completely controled the amour it was within, so Joan got under its conhrol as soon as she put it on As it turned out later, the ghost was supposed to keep us on rails, and "make sure we never do anothing bad-bt at the same time we got a cear message that this ghost was a F----- PERVERT and was about to enjoy every second of controling Joan (YEAH, A FRIGGN LEATHER ARMOURI) in exchange for its services Luckily, Peter managed to coemnce the DM that he wil take this role as a paladn, and that the ghost is necessary Joan apparently wasn't happy about giving her character to GM (after Erst ten f----- minutes of game), s◇ he reluctarty agreed It was 4bnous thes armour was his fetish fuel, but wel, we decided to carry on. It smply would t be tace to break first-tme-GM sesson 06/22 120Fn 15.33 □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fri) 15:33 No.19582906 For some time we somehow managed to get along Every evening Peter staged with Bart (GM, don't think I've mentioned the naene earker) after we leit and tried to advise him There were no visible effects (Peter later told me that Bart mostly kept on nodding without sayng anytng) of bis hep. We kept on nuzcing into examples of standard newbie, bad GM-and more. Stil one-dmensional cardboard-cut-out characters weren't so bad when we got used to them, absurd story was painfil but not unbearable. That is not to say we've had fin Peter was trying to help the DM do anytng reasonable but Bart istened him-and then done completely different thuirg I've received signals from Matthew and Jon that they thought about resigring, Anne wasnt too happy either When finaly one evenng Peter hesitantily taked to Bart in front of us about this, the kid got mad He wan't screaming, but blurting out phrases about "Whos the GM7 I am the GMI IF you don't like it you may quit in a hgh-pitched voice is not how you discuss things. Peter apologized and we've met neat week e meeting when Matthew broke down GM introduced fumes 06/2212Fn)15:38 ぬ19582900 □ Anonymous 06/201 2(Fn) 1 5 38 No19582960 Basically- there was a FUCKHUEAG daemon lord in a castle, biding behind his army of undeads (yeah, not daemons, undeads). As the GM told us in order to defeat hum we needed firries help There were catike oes, lizardike ones, dogike coes... there were "a mystenious race that decided to act seeing how humanity is unable to deal with its e, and was basicaly superior in every way We stil had to kill gobins for them because they were apparent y to powerful for them to care about Yeah these a gots were screan gjoy y when we entered te r encampments with test go n heads, but they were 0-80 superior. Because of some f----- up lore, they were resistact to all attacks "not designed especialy to destroy al thst is good I did never liked frries but managed to deal with it Peter was simply smilng and occasionaly nodding encouraging I dont know about the girls-but Matthew raged We were supposed to ask a daemca prince for hep with breaking into the castle. Yeah, furnes were too elegant to deal with daemons, so we had to ask another daemon for hep. Don't ask me how that was supposed to work Matthew had other plans though-powered bタhis hate of firnes e gathered e thousand peasants and constructed a peasant ra gan Then-fired t at the castle Bart handled it the worst possible way 06/22/12(Fn) 15:43 No.19583025 □ Anonymous 06/22/1 2dFri) 1543 No.19583022 Oh yes, great idea. The radgun fired, oh yesl But unluckily, it was not powerfiul enough to destroy the gates. Sorry h, and you see those skeletons in the castle? How did you know they were planning to do exactly Yeah He srodaced the peasact railguns into enemy's army And their first shot deat 3d100 damage to Mathew's character Then, the GM saggested Marthew could rol another char-this tine one of those furries. They had some horfuckinofying modiiers, and EPP lower than zero Matthew did not appear at the neat session His grtnend d but was her last one after another of DM's dickeries. Just read about what ths retard did Basically he decided that the daemon prince is bored and wil belp us if we manage to brighten his day And be had one, great ideal Without asking anybody about anything he cast one spel at Peter's paladán, and changed his gender And then? And then be gave us a long and davorsome description of how the daemon r---- the rule63rd paladn, and how did hel she enjoged it. Peter tried to rol for spell resistance, and even though he got 19 and 17 he was unable to resist neither body change, nor mind control Description took something like half an hour Somewhere in the middle, the druidess joined in, and there t was- bestiaityldaemonule63mind control WHAT THE F--- threesome. Afterwards it tumed out that the paladin is now lawfil evl (and so is druidess)-since he/she enjoyed it Goodbye paladin powersl I thirk it was then when Peter decided that Bart is beyond retrbution Or maybe he simply got mad □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fn) 15:50 No.19583098 221958306 Oh, but this is not the enáng. At the beginning of nesdt (and last) one Peter had his and Joan's character card, and I took Matthew's. I was really surpeised to see Anne turn up again, but I thought it was thanks to Peter's influence. This last session was held in Peter's house and GM bitched that be had to carry his laptop there (what? Peter deci ed hat since he was no evil s me to become Blackguard So he dd Sice he had 12 levels n paladn, he swapped ten ofthem to become a level 10 Blackguard at once. I would be womed about his skll in role-plaging r63'd falen paladin if I didn't know about him being a thespian. Addibonaly, his character had a lot of ranks in Smithing He was gathering arowheads for quite a time, altogether with leather straps A long time ago, he also asked some randomly-met mage shopkeeper for an item that "has a hole in the midde and burns around eatremely fast He created a chansword. GM was chomping on piza we paid for, and apparently he felt generous, because he alowedt into the game. He alowed a m----------- chainsword rto fantasy realm ㅁ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fn)1 555 No 1958 314 3 My rogue was crossbow specialist. Since Bart thought I am his bestest rend around the table, the gft from daemon prince was a bucket of MAGICALPOWERFULLOLMYPENIS bohs, that were supposed to be capable ofklingaything, including gods. Nobody else, sare from me, would be able to use it, right? Of course, at the end of previous session be made me promise OOC that I won't give them to anybody But Peter and me had an agreement. I simply had enough I wanted an honorable way out, and having may character killed seemed like a somehow reasonable decision So I asked Peter to kill my character It turned out that the castle gates were saddenly opened and great batle (both sides were using peasant railgunal What the f---) was waged Peter smitten good the hel out of me, using coup da grace. Then he stole my bolts and ran away together with the deuidess (since they were both evi and his characters now). Game Master shouted "WHAT and "YOU CAN TI", but since it was my character I managed to convince hum that that's how the RPG works. I stayed in the room though, wondering about what was about to happen Peter and druidess made a run for it, escaping from the battdlebield for a moment. GM was too bewildered to do anything reasonable, and that gave Peter enough time to act He took more leather scraps, and stitched them together. Then, he took those bots of mne and ripped their beads off Then, be put them into this leather strap Then he took his chainsword and swapped those straps. Chansword capable of kling gods in D&D? Yay Bart apparently decided that he's goma to play-well, defeat him- uing the rules. Luckly, from here on we threw aces at the midde of the table, so it was impossible to cheat with mmbers Anoymous 06/22/12Fr)1600 No 19583194 Fuckload of skeletons appeared, the furies were loing, Bart kept on repeating and that's your fault. Yeah. As if somebody cared Peter had the dradessishifter change into a centar Then, he gave her bis former sword that had bonuses aganst undead And shueld that booste d strenght He summoned his Gendish bat, and his undead comparoon. The last one got my magical spear. He and hus skeleton mounted the centur. Thus was the most epic cavalry charge I've ever seen. They dica't stop, they kept onring forward, mowing down skeletoas and zombies of extremely powerful creatures. Modiers from the bolts appbed to Peter's chainsword, and thus e was capable of kiling pretty much anything in cae turn. Since he had cleave feat, the centauress held an awesome sword, the bat helped wth shootersl mages, and the skeleton sometimes did ht something they were a bot of death movng through the battlefield Bart suddenly reaized that they are actually about to defeat the daemon prince. So somebody was going to folow his plotl Reastance got lghter, and they managed to get to this facker Thus wasn't a good battle It was raikroaded battle. Nothing to speak of-Peter's character ended up with 1 HP But Peter kept on smilna 06/22/12Fr)1605 □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fn) 16:05 No19583243 The furnes leader- and all the commanders-turned up to congratulate him on what be did I saspect, Bart stl was plannng on escecuting Peter's char a few moments later, but things turned out differently He used lag-on-hands to heal himsef and his minions Druidess healed hersef Then turned into centaur Peter had his character mount the centauress and charged, screanng "Tr IS ALL MINE NOW, THE WHOLE wORLD IS MINE"!" Never before bave I beard sach a powerful scream of pure, undluted rage NO, NO, NOI YOU CANNOT" MG remembered something THEY ARE RESISTANTI THEY ARE ALL RESISTANT TO YOUR ATTACKI TOUVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE LORE (If you don'r know what is be talking about, check 319582960 Peter shook his head Sute good There was a moment of silence, and then Bart stormed out of the room I wsssed-no shouting,norgng Peter frished his tea, and nodded Shame, actaly Well, I hope he understood something Lady Avermm(that was the name of his now-wonan character) sonehow managed to take control over the remains of the undead and led them to victoey against miserable morptfolk Soon, rnors of her cruet and hedonustic rule spread all over the Forgotten Realms. But this was not the end of the story, no. Somewhere in the forest they were stil two pecple organiing rebels, not wiling to become one of Lady Avemn undead servants. A wizard and cleric, all that remained of former, donous party of adventurers. up "Well now I ㆋ folow him and apologize, we shouldn't go to hard on n. Then he looked at me and Anne then I am about to gomst t y dearheart, so you two cit stay here Just try not to stan And then he let Leaning me and Ame alone in his home Praise him tg. I wil
□ Anonymous 06/22/1am 15:23 No19582796 Right now I am sightly amused and helhstly thaekfil Amused because it was a long time since I have had sach a satisfaction seeing somebody mentaly defeated, and thankful because... well, I will tel you later Introduction frst. I am yor average fatguy that for a long time had no chance to play tabletops. I've made a mistake of teling about this an acquaintance of mine that plays computer games a lot, and- apparentiy- wanted to try pen&papers. He said that he could be a GM, and that the cely thing I should do was to find a party Wel, I lve in a big city and even though RPGs are not so popular in my country, I managed to End some people. An old friend Mattherw) that brought his guifriend along Joan), and this old crush of mine (Anme) that-I was shocked-eagerty agreed to pla with us There was one term though-she wanted ber fnend to come and play too, Since he apparently knew a lot about tabletops and agreed to hep DM wth making the story ra And he is the main hero of this story We started playing a few weeks ago, and as soon as be tumed up it trned out that he have at least seen or met every single one of us before. He appeared to be This Guy incaenate-I don't know if there is ach more to say. Helpbd, joyfil, and so on. Helishly charismatic, aed huge-noat, uge-he made friends with every one of us. Even Iwas lad be plays with us we created a team I guess this邰a good adr ce for a the eams play ng th a res DM take one paladin so that he could help he DM keep he party together and story rolng one clenc and one dnud so that you would be able to face anything (and win) a newbie GM codd throw at you. Peter played palacn Mathew got clerc and Joan was dnad-I picked a rogue and Anne took wizard □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fri) 1528 No.19582860 It was the worst. Adventure. Ever. Imean, Ihave played with DMs that din't know bow to throw dices, but thus one somehow managed to commt not only all those intating, basic mustakes, but also much, much more At the very begning weve defeated a powerul necromancer that made the whole cty hide behind its walls", only to be nearly defeated by five goblrs (aces weren't on our sde) a few moments later. Soon it barned out that the plot was heavly ratlroaded, and all those maeneisms taken from vidya games became apparent. I we wacted to tak to somebody from outside the plot the DM sid bh, h---- is not at homel, if we wanted to go to west instead of south we heard "but there is nothing therel Why would you go there? Your characters, knowing that there is no sense in going there, turn south and I guess we should have got the message at the begrring Joan found a set of leather armorr that tuned out to be nhabited by a ghost The ghost completely controled the amour it was within, so Joan got under its conhrol as soon as she put it on As it turned out later, the ghost was supposed to keep us on rails, and "make sure we never do anothing bad-bt at the same time we got a cear message that this ghost was a F----- PERVERT and was about to enjoy every second of controling Joan (YEAH, A FRIGGN LEATHER ARMOURI) in exchange for its services Luckily, Peter managed to coemnce the DM that he wil take this role as a paladn, and that the ghost is necessary Joan apparently wasn't happy about giving her character to GM (after Erst ten f----- minutes of game), s◇ he reluctarty agreed It was 4bnous thes armour was his fetish fuel, but wel, we decided to carry on. It smply would t be tace to break first-tme-GM sesson 06/22 120Fn 15.33 □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fri) 15:33 No.19582906 For some time we somehow managed to get along Every evening Peter staged with Bart (GM, don't think I've mentioned the naene earker) after we leit and tried to advise him There were no visible effects (Peter later told me that Bart mostly kept on nodding without sayng anytng) of bis hep. We kept on nuzcing into examples of standard newbie, bad GM-and more. Stil one-dmensional cardboard-cut-out characters weren't so bad when we got used to them, absurd story was painfil but not unbearable. That is not to say we've had fin Peter was trying to help the DM do anytng reasonable but Bart istened him-and then done completely different thuirg I've received signals from Matthew and Jon that they thought about resigring, Anne wasnt too happy either When finaly one evenng Peter hesitantily taked to Bart in front of us about this, the kid got mad He wan't screaming, but blurting out phrases about "Whos the GM7 I am the GMI IF you don't like it you may quit in a hgh-pitched voice is not how you discuss things. Peter apologized and we've met neat week e meeting when Matthew broke down GM introduced fumes 06/2212Fn)15:38 ぬ19582900 □ Anonymous 06/201 2(Fn) 1 5 38 No19582960 Basically- there was a FUCKHUEAG daemon lord in a castle, biding behind his army of undeads (yeah, not daemons, undeads). As the GM told us in order to defeat hum we needed firries help There were catike oes, lizardike ones, dogike coes... there were "a mystenious race that decided to act seeing how humanity is unable to deal with its e, and was basicaly superior in every way We stil had to kill gobins for them because they were apparent y to powerful for them to care about Yeah these a gots were screan gjoy y when we entered te r encampments with test go n heads, but they were 0-80 superior. Because of some f----- up lore, they were resistact to all attacks "not designed especialy to destroy al thst is good I did never liked frries but managed to deal with it Peter was simply smilng and occasionaly nodding encouraging I dont know about the girls-but Matthew raged We were supposed to ask a daemca prince for hep with breaking into the castle. Yeah, furnes were too elegant to deal with daemons, so we had to ask another daemon for hep. Don't ask me how that was supposed to work Matthew had other plans though-powered bタhis hate of firnes e gathered e thousand peasants and constructed a peasant ra gan Then-fired t at the castle Bart handled it the worst possible way 06/22/12(Fn) 15:43 No.19583025 □ Anonymous 06/22/1 2dFri) 1543 No.19583022 Oh yes, great idea. The radgun fired, oh yesl But unluckily, it was not powerfiul enough to destroy the gates. Sorry h, and you see those skeletons in the castle? How did you know they were planning to do exactly Yeah He srodaced the peasact railguns into enemy's army And their first shot deat 3d100 damage to Mathew's character Then, the GM saggested Marthew could rol another char-this tine one of those furries. They had some horfuckinofying modiiers, and EPP lower than zero Matthew did not appear at the neat session His grtnend d but was her last one after another of DM's dickeries. Just read about what ths retard did Basically he decided that the daemon prince is bored and wil belp us if we manage to brighten his day And be had one, great ideal Without asking anybody about anything he cast one spel at Peter's paladán, and changed his gender And then? And then be gave us a long and davorsome description of how the daemon r---- the rule63rd paladn, and how did hel she enjoged it. Peter tried to rol for spell resistance, and even though he got 19 and 17 he was unable to resist neither body change, nor mind control Description took something like half an hour Somewhere in the middle, the druidess joined in, and there t was- bestiaityldaemonule63mind control WHAT THE F--- threesome. Afterwards it tumed out that the paladin is now lawfil evl (and so is druidess)-since he/she enjoyed it Goodbye paladin powersl I thirk it was then when Peter decided that Bart is beyond retrbution Or maybe he simply got mad □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fn) 15:50 No.19583098 221958306 Oh, but this is not the enáng. At the beginning of nesdt (and last) one Peter had his and Joan's character card, and I took Matthew's. I was really surpeised to see Anne turn up again, but I thought it was thanks to Peter's influence. This last session was held in Peter's house and GM bitched that be had to carry his laptop there (what? Peter deci ed hat since he was no evil s me to become Blackguard So he dd Sice he had 12 levels n paladn, he swapped ten ofthem to become a level 10 Blackguard at once. I would be womed about his skll in role-plaging r63'd falen paladin if I didn't know about him being a thespian. Addibonaly, his character had a lot of ranks in Smithing He was gathering arowheads for quite a time, altogether with leather straps A long time ago, he also asked some randomly-met mage shopkeeper for an item that "has a hole in the midde and burns around eatremely fast He created a chansword. GM was chomping on piza we paid for, and apparently he felt generous, because he alowedt into the game. He alowed a m----------- chainsword rto fantasy realm ㅁ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fn)1 555 No 1958 314 3 My rogue was crossbow specialist. Since Bart thought I am his bestest rend around the table, the gft from daemon prince was a bucket of MAGICALPOWERFULLOLMYPENIS bohs, that were supposed to be capable ofklingaything, including gods. Nobody else, sare from me, would be able to use it, right? Of course, at the end of previous session be made me promise OOC that I won't give them to anybody But Peter and me had an agreement. I simply had enough I wanted an honorable way out, and having may character killed seemed like a somehow reasonable decision So I asked Peter to kill my character It turned out that the castle gates were saddenly opened and great batle (both sides were using peasant railgunal What the f---) was waged Peter smitten good the hel out of me, using coup da grace. Then he stole my bolts and ran away together with the deuidess (since they were both evi and his characters now). Game Master shouted "WHAT and "YOU CAN TI", but since it was my character I managed to convince hum that that's how the RPG works. I stayed in the room though, wondering about what was about to happen Peter and druidess made a run for it, escaping from the battdlebield for a moment. GM was too bewildered to do anything reasonable, and that gave Peter enough time to act He took more leather scraps, and stitched them together. Then, he took those bots of mne and ripped their beads off Then, be put them into this leather strap Then he took his chainsword and swapped those straps. Chansword capable of kling gods in D&D? Yay Bart apparently decided that he's goma to play-well, defeat him- uing the rules. Luckly, from here on we threw aces at the midde of the table, so it was impossible to cheat with mmbers Anoymous 06/22/12Fr)1600 No 19583194 Fuckload of skeletons appeared, the furies were loing, Bart kept on repeating and that's your fault. Yeah. As if somebody cared Peter had the dradessishifter change into a centar Then, he gave her bis former sword that had bonuses aganst undead And shueld that booste d strenght He summoned his Gendish bat, and his undead comparoon. The last one got my magical spear. He and hus skeleton mounted the centur. Thus was the most epic cavalry charge I've ever seen. They dica't stop, they kept onring forward, mowing down skeletoas and zombies of extremely powerful creatures. Modiers from the bolts appbed to Peter's chainsword, and thus e was capable of kiling pretty much anything in cae turn. Since he had cleave feat, the centauress held an awesome sword, the bat helped wth shootersl mages, and the skeleton sometimes did ht something they were a bot of death movng through the battlefield Bart suddenly reaized that they are actually about to defeat the daemon prince. So somebody was going to folow his plotl Reastance got lghter, and they managed to get to this facker Thus wasn't a good battle It was raikroaded battle. Nothing to speak of-Peter's character ended up with 1 HP But Peter kept on smilna 06/22/12Fr)1605 □ Anonymous 06/22/12(Fn) 16:05 No19583243 The furnes leader- and all the commanders-turned up to congratulate him on what be did I saspect, Bart stl was plannng on escecuting Peter's char a few moments later, but things turned out differently He used lag-on-hands to heal himsef and his minions Druidess healed hersef Then turned into centaur Peter had his character mount the centauress and charged, screanng "Tr IS ALL MINE NOW, THE WHOLE wORLD IS MINE"!" Never before bave I beard sach a powerful scream of pure, undluted rage NO, NO, NOI YOU CANNOT" MG remembered something THEY ARE RESISTANTI THEY ARE ALL RESISTANT TO YOUR ATTACKI TOUVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE LORE (If you don'r know what is be talking about, check 319582960 Peter shook his head Sute good There was a moment of silence, and then Bart stormed out of the room I wsssed-no shouting,norgng Peter frished his tea, and nodded Shame, actaly Well, I hope he understood something Lady Avermm(that was the name of his now-wonan character) sonehow managed to take control over the remains of the undead and led them to victoey against miserable morptfolk Soon, rnors of her cruet and hedonustic rule spread all over the Forgotten Realms. But this was not the end of the story, no. Somewhere in the forest they were stil two pecple organiing rebels, not wiling to become one of Lady Avemn undead servants. A wizard and cleric, all that remained of former, donous party of adventurers. up "Well now I ㆋ folow him and apologize, we shouldn't go to hard on n. Then he looked at me and Anne then I am about to gomst t y dearheart, so you two cit stay here Just try not to stan And then he let Leaning me and Ame alone in his home Praise him tg. I wil

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/tg/ mods

「/tg/ mod 05/12/11(Thu)09:00 No.149011870困 File 1305205243.png-(231 KB, 393x357, 1293935244600.png) Mechas? In MY stricly ruled /tg/? THATS AGAINST THE RUUUULES - (USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)
「/tg/ mod 05/12/11(Thu)09:00 No.149011870困 File 1305205243.png-(231 KB, 393x357, 1293935244600.png) Mechas? In MY stricly ruled /tg/? THATS AGAINST THE RUUUULES - (USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

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superguard

> Anonymous Tue Aug 10 01:16:32 2010 No.1 1604003 I've got a story for you gentleman. A story of unintentional terror. It was a Pathfinder game we modcled off of Assassin's Creed. An all-Rogue party (with a ranger or fighter multiclass or two thrown in) kicking ass and jumping rooftops all over Chcliax. The group was unstoppablc, and many a session was spent glecfully beating down guards before moving on to dramatically killing the Target of their latest contract. And then it happened. Onc of the players rolled a 1 on his throat-thrcat to catch a basic guard straight out of the GamcMaster's Guide's NPC gallery (save for a random weapon.) The guard then rolled a 20 on initiative after the surprisc round went to hell, a 19 on his attack, and maximum damage with a wild power-attack with a warhammer. We drew from the GamcMastery critical hit deck, and he ended up doing 80 damage and stunning the rogue for one round One round was enough. His next attack killed the bcl finishing off his friends. He turned, as that Assassin's brother charged him for bloody revengc. Our dear swashbuckling hcro rolled a 1, provoked an attack of opportunity, and took 50-somcthing damage and 12 blccd. He died before his own round was even ovcr lcagcred assassin, while the rest of the party was Concin.ec >> Anonymous Tue Aug 10 01:23:32 2010 No.11604095 >11604003 The remaining two PCs glance at cach othcr. They were thc less scrupulous of the pair, and knew when discrction was the better part of valor. They turncd, and fled off of the building. Onc of them failcd his acrobatics check, which I represented by having the guard angrily fling his warhammer at him. Hc failcd his reflex to grab onto a balcony, and then his sccond rcflex to grab onto a piling. Hc caught the balcony with his tecth, and the piling with his spinc. He drowned in the Korvosan lagoon, and his lonc compatriot cscaped to tcll the talc. That remaining assassin gathcred a new crew, and from then on stecred clcar of guard patrols. He knew that that man was waiting for him somewherc. He was the one who had gotten away. Eventually, the group madc it all the way to the Queen's throne room, slaying her personal guard, and cornering her in her last redoubt. As they advanced, they heard the door bchind them slam opcn. Thcy turned He was there. Shillouctted against a lightning-lit sky, glcaming in the same low -ranking guard armor, but clutching a dulled and rusted warhammer, freshly dredged from a lagoon. The Assassins' faces fell. Their hcarts sank. The Super Guard was upon them. And he found them wanting
> Anonymous Tue Aug 10 01:16:32 2010 No.1 1604003 I've got a story for you gentleman. A story of unintentional terror. It was a Pathfinder game we modcled off of Assassin's Creed. An all-Rogue party (with a ranger or fighter multiclass or two thrown in) kicking ass and jumping rooftops all over Chcliax. The group was unstoppablc, and many a session was spent glecfully beating down guards before moving on to dramatically killing the Target of their latest contract. And then it happened. Onc of the players rolled a 1 on his throat-thrcat to catch a basic guard straight out of the GamcMaster's Guide's NPC gallery (save for a random weapon.) The guard then rolled a 20 on initiative after the surprisc round went to hell, a 19 on his attack, and maximum damage with a wild power-attack with a warhammer. We drew from the GamcMastery critical hit deck, and he ended up doing 80 damage and stunning the rogue for one round One round was enough. His next attack killed the bcl finishing off his friends. He turned, as that Assassin's brother charged him for bloody revengc. Our dear swashbuckling hcro rolled a 1, provoked an attack of opportunity, and took 50-somcthing damage and 12 blccd. He died before his own round was even ovcr lcagcred assassin, while the rest of the party was Concin.ec >> Anonymous Tue Aug 10 01:23:32 2010 No.11604095 >11604003 The remaining two PCs glance at cach othcr. They were thc less scrupulous of the pair, and knew when discrction was the better part of valor. They turncd, and fled off of the building. Onc of them failcd his acrobatics check, which I represented by having the guard angrily fling his warhammer at him. Hc failcd his reflex to grab onto a balcony, and then his sccond rcflex to grab onto a piling. Hc caught the balcony with his tecth, and the piling with his spinc. He drowned in the Korvosan lagoon, and his lonc compatriot cscaped to tcll the talc. That remaining assassin gathcred a new crew, and from then on stecred clcar of guard patrols. He knew that that man was waiting for him somewherc. He was the one who had gotten away. Eventually, the group madc it all the way to the Queen's throne room, slaying her personal guard, and cornering her in her last redoubt. As they advanced, they heard the door bchind them slam opcn. Thcy turned He was there. Shillouctted against a lightning-lit sky, glcaming in the same low -ranking guard armor, but clutching a dulled and rusted warhammer, freshly dredged from a lagoon. The Assassins' faces fell. Their hcarts sank. The Super Guard was upon them. And he found them wanting

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"but he coudn't look at me"

File: 1333656355 png-(10 KB, 382x421, plushies0006.png) □ Anonymous 04/05/12(Thu)16:05 No.18586590 My character has a stuffed tarrasque No, not a real one, just a little one that he carries around with himm In all other regards, he's a tough mercenary who lacks any sense of a soft side. He takes what he wants whenever he wants it, and respects no one who can't beat him in a fight. I will admit that it's somewhat jarring for such a character to carry around a stuffed animal, but I'm rather prone to allowing my characters to think for themselves, and this guy really likes his tarrasque toy The other players in my group simply considered it an eccentricity of the character and didn't think too much about it, especially because their characters were far weirder and had odder habits and traits. However, my DM started to obsess about the stuffed animal I didn't originally intend to hide the "story" behind the stuffed animal from my DM, but when he first asked me what my character's reason for it was, I got a sense that it wasn't really the mood to explain it. I just dodged the question, fully intending to explain myself later, but my DM's attitude suddenly soured and he demanded to know, saying that characters couldn't have any secrets that the DM didn't know I decided to simply refuse that idea by not telling him the reason why my character had a stuffed animal, and I had enough cheek to still ask for his "permission" for my character to have a stuffed animal. He likely would have refused if he could come up with a reason that wouldn't invalidate everyone else's characters, but without such a reason he gave me his permission. □ Anonymous 04/06/12(Thu)16:07 No.18586601 It wasnt even a really interesting "story." He just received the toy as a child, and no one ever explained that only children play with toys. It was just supposed to be a minor note of my character, a way to show that he didn't care what others thought about him and that he had different ideas of what made a man a man However, my refusal to speak about it made everyone think there was some melodramatic story behind the toy, like it was the last gift from his dying mother or a memento of a slain son. I tried to keep the toy as just something that was listed on his character sheet under "Items," but my DM just couldn't get over the fact that I was keeping a part of my characters story to myself. The DM tried to make my character's life difficult, by having villagers ridicule him for carrying around the toy and people treating him like he had the mind of a child. When he realized this didn't bother me and some good roleplaying resulted from it, he decided to change tact by trying to get rid of the toy Ps □ Anonymous 04/05/12(Thu)16:07 No.18586616 Fireballs started to damage our items. Thieves began to regularly visit us in the night. Ethereal Filchers, Raggomoffyns, moths and mold, sunlight and dirt, everything in the world that could either damage, steal on eat my character's toy was thrown at it. Of course, my character would try to protect the tarrasque, often very enthusiastically, until my character's sole defining trait was how much he cared about the toy Finally, it happened. A black dragon's acid breath. Poor reflex saves, and an overwhelming amount of damage. Half of my backpack was destroyed, and the stuffed animal wasn't the hardiest of objects My DM couldn't help but smile. We both understood how a story was crafted, and my character had a very small window in which he had a chance to explain the toy's story. When one of the other players asked him about it, he would either have to explain it, or it would just be decided that he never had a story to begin with and they toy would be eventually forgotten as just a weird quirk of my character. It was either reveal the story while it was relevant, or throw away the chance forever As much as I didn't want to tell the DM my story, I had to admit that I was trapped. It was just how the story had to go Otherwise, it would be a bad story Ps Anonymous 04/05/12(Thu)16:08 No.18586620 So, after we had killed the black dragon, the opportunity arose. A player asked me why I had cared so much about the toy I asked the group if they ever had any toys when they were children. After a brief moment, they all (except for the drow rogue) said they had I asked them if they really cared about a particular toy. Really cared about it. Took it with them everywhere Some of them had. Oddly enough, the DM chimed in, saying he remembered also having a stuffed animal he carried around with him everywhere until he was eight. I ignored him, and continued ked them what happen at toy. There was a moment of s as the players thought about it elped them with swer. "You lost it, right You could it one day, and you looked everywhere for it. You asked your if they had seen i the So, you cried there, but only because you were lonely. You hought that you woul even SvTv.mLVT. 04/05/12(Thu)1 9 No.18586622 "Every few days you would search around the house, around the had to accept that it was gone. You'd never see it agai thinking up new places to look even though you knew all the places it could be. The days stretched into weeks, into months, until you I ope "You didn't You never even imagined. It never crossed your mind that something could convince your parents that you were too old to carry a toy with you everywhere. That's because you can't see it that tand this idea that losing that toy will let you better fit in with society. You don't believe that it will way. You don't The thin I watched my parents take mine. They thought I was asleep I left my home that night, because I could My DM sat across from me, but he couldn't look at me ou oping with grief an and will ma ke you more matu g you r and is how your pare n give you something, allow you to grow to love it, to love it more than anything e then take it away from you tand. I couldn't und tand what kind of person coul omeone love something, to genuinely care about it o try and take it away from them
File: 1333656355 png-(10 KB, 382x421, plushies0006.png) □ Anonymous 04/05/12(Thu)16:05 No.18586590 My character has a stuffed tarrasque No, not a real one, just a little one that he carries around with himm In all other regards, he's a tough mercenary who lacks any sense of a soft side. He takes what he wants whenever he wants it, and respects no one who can't beat him in a fight. I will admit that it's somewhat jarring for such a character to carry around a stuffed animal, but I'm rather prone to allowing my characters to think for themselves, and this guy really likes his tarrasque toy The other players in my group simply considered it an eccentricity of the character and didn't think too much about it, especially because their characters were far weirder and had odder habits and traits. However, my DM started to obsess about the stuffed animal I didn't originally intend to hide the "story" behind the stuffed animal from my DM, but when he first asked me what my character's reason for it was, I got a sense that it wasn't really the mood to explain it. I just dodged the question, fully intending to explain myself later, but my DM's attitude suddenly soured and he demanded to know, saying that characters couldn't have any secrets that the DM didn't know I decided to simply refuse that idea by not telling him the reason why my character had a stuffed animal, and I had enough cheek to still ask for his "permission" for my character to have a stuffed animal. He likely would have refused if he could come up with a reason that wouldn't invalidate everyone else's characters, but without such a reason he gave me his permission. □ Anonymous 04/06/12(Thu)16:07 No.18586601 It wasnt even a really interesting "story." He just received the toy as a child, and no one ever explained that only children play with toys. It was just supposed to be a minor note of my character, a way to show that he didn't care what others thought about him and that he had different ideas of what made a man a man However, my refusal to speak about it made everyone think there was some melodramatic story behind the toy, like it was the last gift from his dying mother or a memento of a slain son. I tried to keep the toy as just something that was listed on his character sheet under "Items," but my DM just couldn't get over the fact that I was keeping a part of my characters story to myself. The DM tried to make my character's life difficult, by having villagers ridicule him for carrying around the toy and people treating him like he had the mind of a child. When he realized this didn't bother me and some good roleplaying resulted from it, he decided to change tact by trying to get rid of the toy Ps □ Anonymous 04/05/12(Thu)16:07 No.18586616 Fireballs started to damage our items. Thieves began to regularly visit us in the night. Ethereal Filchers, Raggomoffyns, moths and mold, sunlight and dirt, everything in the world that could either damage, steal on eat my character's toy was thrown at it. Of course, my character would try to protect the tarrasque, often very enthusiastically, until my character's sole defining trait was how much he cared about the toy Finally, it happened. A black dragon's acid breath. Poor reflex saves, and an overwhelming amount of damage. Half of my backpack was destroyed, and the stuffed animal wasn't the hardiest of objects My DM couldn't help but smile. We both understood how a story was crafted, and my character had a very small window in which he had a chance to explain the toy's story. When one of the other players asked him about it, he would either have to explain it, or it would just be decided that he never had a story to begin with and they toy would be eventually forgotten as just a weird quirk of my character. It was either reveal the story while it was relevant, or throw away the chance forever As much as I didn't want to tell the DM my story, I had to admit that I was trapped. It was just how the story had to go Otherwise, it would be a bad story Ps Anonymous 04/05/12(Thu)16:08 No.18586620 So, after we had killed the black dragon, the opportunity arose. A player asked me why I had cared so much about the toy I asked the group if they ever had any toys when they were children. After a brief moment, they all (except for the drow rogue) said they had I asked them if they really cared about a particular toy. Really cared about it. Took it with them everywhere Some of them had. Oddly enough, the DM chimed in, saying he remembered also having a stuffed animal he carried around with him everywhere until he was eight. I ignored him, and continued ked them what happen at toy. There was a moment of s as the players thought about it elped them with swer. "You lost it, right You could it one day, and you looked everywhere for it. You asked your if they had seen i the So, you cried there, but only because you were lonely. You hought that you woul even SvTv.mLVT. 04/05/12(Thu)1 9 No.18586622 "Every few days you would search around the house, around the had to accept that it was gone. You'd never see it agai thinking up new places to look even though you knew all the places it could be. The days stretched into weeks, into months, until you I ope "You didn't You never even imagined. It never crossed your mind that something could convince your parents that you were too old to carry a toy with you everywhere. That's because you can't see it that tand this idea that losing that toy will let you better fit in with society. You don't believe that it will way. You don't The thin I watched my parents take mine. They thought I was asleep I left my home that night, because I could My DM sat across from me, but he couldn't look at me ou oping with grief an and will ma ke you more matu g you r and is how your pare n give you something, allow you to grow to love it, to love it more than anything e then take it away from you tand. I couldn't und tand what kind of person coul omeone love something, to genuinely care about it o try and take it away from them

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c for cannon

□ Anonymous 09/22/11 (Thu)21:41 No.16391478 File1316742104 png-(62 KB, 219x221, kirbyomg. png) OH MY 60SH Party in a city-based 4e D&D game are sneaking into a steampunk newspaper company to replace a (true) story that might cast their party in a negative They are a cockney child rogue, a human pitfighter, and a gnome artificer who totes around a magical tome of his family's history that is also an light encyclopedia, that also acts as a focus for all his (refluffed) spells >Thief on sneaking, story swapping detail >Gnome on distraction, pitfighter on mop-up Gnome enters through the front door, LOUDLY Starts LOUDLY talking to receptionist about how he wants his family history printed in the paper >Slams tome down on desk >"The GREAT HISTORY of the vonSpielhelm family shall not be unabridged!" -l, the DM, ask him to roll bluff. He INSISTS that this is a diplomacy roll. I yield to logic. >He does fairly well. >The secretary decides, to humor him, she'll flip through the book >The book which acts as a focus for his offensive spells >Dice are rolled >She opens up the book to "C for "Cannon" >Half a second later, the receptionist is sans-head, all the writers, clerics, and pencil-pushers are running screaming out of the building, and the gnome is the best distraction ever >hfw
□ Anonymous 09/22/11 (Thu)21:41 No.16391478 File1316742104 png-(62 KB, 219x221, kirbyomg. png) OH MY 60SH Party in a city-based 4e D&D game are sneaking into a steampunk newspaper company to replace a (true) story that might cast their party in a negative They are a cockney child rogue, a human pitfighter, and a gnome artificer who totes around a magical tome of his family's history that is also an light encyclopedia, that also acts as a focus for all his (refluffed) spells >Thief on sneaking, story swapping detail >Gnome on distraction, pitfighter on mop-up Gnome enters through the front door, LOUDLY Starts LOUDLY talking to receptionist about how he wants his family history printed in the paper >Slams tome down on desk >"The GREAT HISTORY of the vonSpielhelm family shall not be unabridged!" -l, the DM, ask him to roll bluff. He INSISTS that this is a diplomacy roll. I yield to logic. >He does fairly well. >The secretary decides, to humor him, she'll flip through the book >The book which acts as a focus for his offensive spells >Dice are rolled >She opens up the book to "C for "Cannon" >Half a second later, the receptionist is sans-head, all the writers, clerics, and pencil-pushers are running screaming out of the building, and the gnome is the best distraction ever >hfw

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horses man, just horses

Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:37pm No. 18136346 18136385 Oh boy, you asked for it It was my first time doing D and D in three-point-five- or any sort of traditional game, for that matter, in the fall/winter of aught-ten. And our group was WIERD First member of the party was a That Guy, but he wasn't the one who did the shenanigans to be described. However, once he left the group, we did find that he had a ninth level spell in his wizardly inventory titled "evade black testicle." I don't even... but not the point. The DM was experienced, and had run other campaigns before, but a bunch of them were fa/tg/uys, and not in the good way- most of the games were arguing about rules Which truly makes the following story more horrifying □ Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:42pm No. 18136385 [ ! ] >> 18136426 >18136346 Okay, so on my second session, the paladin (l think, I'm still pretty new and was confused on what everyone was) claims that he's summoning a "Urethral Horse." I just stared at him I asked him why he was saying it like that, and the DM handed me the sourcebook for it >Ethereal Carefully, gently, I explained EXACTLY what that word was, and how it is pronounced, before explaining the word they were using The laughter of our immaturity prevented ANYTHING ELSE from happening that night. But the horror and hilarity didn't stop there. Ohhhhh no For the next time we had a gaming night, we had decided that, yes, the horse was indeed coming out of the Paladin's urethra. The maturity of our group was astounding But then the Paladin started coming up with ideas on how to use this LI Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:46pm No. 181 36426 [ ! ]>> 18136491 P> The first idea was that he could stick only the hind legs of the horse out of his penis, and use them as a set of legs to improve his sprinting speed >wat Once the laughter from THAT had died down, he then asked if he could do the same thing, but with the front legs for a powerful kicking attack. >ohgodwat Then... we did it. The act which will live in infamy I don't know if anyone else has done it, but there is a certain perverse satisfaction in stunning the DM into horrified silence Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:52pm No. 18136491 [!18136524 18136525 18136539 >18136541 218136752 1814162218144670 >18136426 We were playing a premade campaign for 3.5, something like "Red Hand," or something, and we had just beaten a shapeshifting monster that was attacking a town. It was still alive, though, and we were interrogating it on what the BBEG of the campaign was all about. However, there was a catch. We had a time limit, because a city was about to come under siege from an army. So clearly we needed to hurry, but there was so much we could learn from this creature And then psychopaladin answered. As he went on, the horror mounted >l have a horse inside my d---, right? >Yes >And a horse is much, much larger than my d---, right? >Jokes about size of genetalia aside, answer is again, yes >That means that my penis is larger on the inside I began to see where this was going He went on >So my penis is actually some sort of bag of holding I was torn between laughing my ass off and fleeing and praying for my soul >So what we should do is stick this monster in my penis-bag of holding until we can interrogate her properly I am not kidding Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:55pm No.18136539 [!] 18136558 18136562 2218136586 18136591 2218136600 18137568 18141622 >18136491 The DM just STARED at the Paladin, who was smiling smugly while the rest of the table pretty much disintegrated into mirth Finally, he said lines which will live forever in my mind SThe monster overhears you, and rather than do THAT, kills itself." Sad part was, that was the SECOND monster we'd managed to kill with our words alone. I was in the bathroom for the first, so l can't describe it We continued on for another month or two before it kinda tapered off
Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:37pm No. 18136346 18136385 Oh boy, you asked for it It was my first time doing D and D in three-point-five- or any sort of traditional game, for that matter, in the fall/winter of aught-ten. And our group was WIERD First member of the party was a That Guy, but he wasn't the one who did the shenanigans to be described. However, once he left the group, we did find that he had a ninth level spell in his wizardly inventory titled "evade black testicle." I don't even... but not the point. The DM was experienced, and had run other campaigns before, but a bunch of them were fa/tg/uys, and not in the good way- most of the games were arguing about rules Which truly makes the following story more horrifying □ Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:42pm No. 18136385 [ ! ] >> 18136426 >18136346 Okay, so on my second session, the paladin (l think, I'm still pretty new and was confused on what everyone was) claims that he's summoning a "Urethral Horse." I just stared at him I asked him why he was saying it like that, and the DM handed me the sourcebook for it >Ethereal Carefully, gently, I explained EXACTLY what that word was, and how it is pronounced, before explaining the word they were using The laughter of our immaturity prevented ANYTHING ELSE from happening that night. But the horror and hilarity didn't stop there. Ohhhhh no For the next time we had a gaming night, we had decided that, yes, the horse was indeed coming out of the Paladin's urethra. The maturity of our group was astounding But then the Paladin started coming up with ideas on how to use this LI Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:46pm No. 181 36426 [ ! ]>> 18136491 P> The first idea was that he could stick only the hind legs of the horse out of his penis, and use them as a set of legs to improve his sprinting speed >wat Once the laughter from THAT had died down, he then asked if he could do the same thing, but with the front legs for a powerful kicking attack. >ohgodwat Then... we did it. The act which will live in infamy I don't know if anyone else has done it, but there is a certain perverse satisfaction in stunning the DM into horrified silence Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:52pm No. 18136491 [!18136524 18136525 18136539 >18136541 218136752 1814162218144670 >18136426 We were playing a premade campaign for 3.5, something like "Red Hand," or something, and we had just beaten a shapeshifting monster that was attacking a town. It was still alive, though, and we were interrogating it on what the BBEG of the campaign was all about. However, there was a catch. We had a time limit, because a city was about to come under siege from an army. So clearly we needed to hurry, but there was so much we could learn from this creature And then psychopaladin answered. As he went on, the horror mounted >l have a horse inside my d---, right? >Yes >And a horse is much, much larger than my d---, right? >Jokes about size of genetalia aside, answer is again, yes >That means that my penis is larger on the inside I began to see where this was going He went on >So my penis is actually some sort of bag of holding I was torn between laughing my ass off and fleeing and praying for my soul >So what we should do is stick this monster in my penis-bag of holding until we can interrogate her properly I am not kidding Sithking Zero 02/28/12(Tue)2:55pm No.18136539 [!] 18136558 18136562 2218136586 18136591 2218136600 18137568 18141622 >18136491 The DM just STARED at the Paladin, who was smiling smugly while the rest of the table pretty much disintegrated into mirth Finally, he said lines which will live forever in my mind SThe monster overhears you, and rather than do THAT, kills itself." Sad part was, that was the SECOND monster we'd managed to kill with our words alone. I was in the bathroom for the first, so l can't describe it We continued on for another month or two before it kinda tapered off

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worse then boom clang

1218992925.ipg-(40 KB, 300x300, OrdinarySword.jpg) □88The Ordinary Sword Anonymous 08/17/08(Sun) 13:08 No. 2361684 Hey tg/, i'm here to present you an idea for an item i'm including in my next exalted campaign. The Ordinary Sword. To any form of inspection or most forms of testing, it is just that. a perfectly ordinary sword. its history is completely normal it was forged by a mildly competent blacksmith, sold for a good price, used by several soldiers in succession. It is tarnished by its age, and there are signs of damage all up its blade Its only special property comes into play when the supernatural does, in that everything it touches is reduced to nomality. Your orichalchum armour is now simply gold, your essence charged flesh parts like butter, and even an ethereal or non-physical form is harmed. even if you are a giant of a man with muscles the size or bears, thi s sword can still take off your arm. This effect is constant. No matter how powerful the entity, if the sword wounds them, it deals equivalent damage to a normal version if your thirty stories tall, and it chops into your leg, your leg falls of. It is one of the most dangerous artifacts ever known, simply because any- exalt, god, or even the primordials, are made as vulnerable as normal humans The beginning of the campaign would be a death knight stealing it, with the intention of stabbing it into the core of the pole of earth (The heart of creation) in the hope of slaying creation itself. Any thoughts? Sorry for the crappy pic, its surprisingly hard to find pictures of ordinary swords □ That Fat Thighed W-----3 pZS1G/XQVc 08/17/08(Sun) 18:03 No. 2363 101 2363073 Now that is one thing I HAVE wondered How would everyone in exalt land react if they were to be told there were other realties? Other creations? One that were limitless in size. Living on large balls instead of a flat expanse. No wyld. No magic either I wonder how they would react to being told about technology Especially how a mere mortal can wield might that could rival gods. And how mere mortals could make a weapon that could wipe out cities the size of Yu Shan in the blink of an eye MIND FUT兀兀兀JCK. □ Unholy Clown Ninja Anonymous, Xorn's Champion ! ! 0aKrfPD0CW4 08/17/08 (Sun) 1 806 No. 23631 14 >2363101 Ooh, a nomalcy nuke. That strikes me as cooler than the sword. □ That Fat Thighed W-----31pZS1G&OVc 08/17/08(Sun) 18:08 No. 23631 16 236311 Not what I meant.. but. I am utterly terrified that I inspired that line of thought normalcy nuke? D: g Unholy Clown Ninja Anonymous. Xorn's Champion lIOaKrfPDoCW4 08/17/08(Sun) 18:14 No. 2363 1421 File :1219011245 ipg-(44 KB, 732x626, scary.jpg) 2363116 An incident occurs where a whole city is wiped out in an instant, exalts and all. A tough and brave exalt enters and reports everything is gone. He finds out that he's lost his powers and slowly dies of some unknown sickness that is 1mpos sible to cure
1218992925.ipg-(40 KB, 300x300, OrdinarySword.jpg) □88The Ordinary Sword Anonymous 08/17/08(Sun) 13:08 No. 2361684 Hey tg/, i'm here to present you an idea for an item i'm including in my next exalted campaign. The Ordinary Sword. To any form of inspection or most forms of testing, it is just that. a perfectly ordinary sword. its history is completely normal it was forged by a mildly competent blacksmith, sold for a good price, used by several soldiers in succession. It is tarnished by its age, and there are signs of damage all up its blade Its only special property comes into play when the supernatural does, in that everything it touches is reduced to nomality. Your orichalchum armour is now simply gold, your essence charged flesh parts like butter, and even an ethereal or non-physical form is harmed. even if you are a giant of a man with muscles the size or bears, thi s sword can still take off your arm. This effect is constant. No matter how powerful the entity, if the sword wounds them, it deals equivalent damage to a normal version if your thirty stories tall, and it chops into your leg, your leg falls of. It is one of the most dangerous artifacts ever known, simply because any- exalt, god, or even the primordials, are made as vulnerable as normal humans The beginning of the campaign would be a death knight stealing it, with the intention of stabbing it into the core of the pole of earth (The heart of creation) in the hope of slaying creation itself. Any thoughts? Sorry for the crappy pic, its surprisingly hard to find pictures of ordinary swords □ That Fat Thighed W-----3 pZS1G/XQVc 08/17/08(Sun) 18:03 No. 2363 101 2363073 Now that is one thing I HAVE wondered How would everyone in exalt land react if they were to be told there were other realties? Other creations? One that were limitless in size. Living on large balls instead of a flat expanse. No wyld. No magic either I wonder how they would react to being told about technology Especially how a mere mortal can wield might that could rival gods. And how mere mortals could make a weapon that could wipe out cities the size of Yu Shan in the blink of an eye MIND FUT兀兀兀JCK. □ Unholy Clown Ninja Anonymous, Xorn's Champion ! ! 0aKrfPD0CW4 08/17/08 (Sun) 1 806 No. 23631 14 >2363101 Ooh, a nomalcy nuke. That strikes me as cooler than the sword. □ That Fat Thighed W-----31pZS1G&OVc 08/17/08(Sun) 18:08 No. 23631 16 236311 Not what I meant.. but. I am utterly terrified that I inspired that line of thought normalcy nuke? D: g Unholy Clown Ninja Anonymous. Xorn's Champion lIOaKrfPDoCW4 08/17/08(Sun) 18:14 No. 2363 1421 File :1219011245 ipg-(44 KB, 732x626, scary.jpg) 2363116 An incident occurs where a whole city is wiped out in an instant, exalts and all. A tough and brave exalt enters and reports everything is gone. He finds out that he's lost his powers and slowly dies of some unknown sickness that is 1mpos sible to cure

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I found a cure

| Wasteland warrior NV48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:11 No.5942529 The next bad player story was also a bad dm story, but mostly do to his permissive attitude. I was told it was a d20 modern game and that was it. What he didn't tell me was that it was chock full of the supernatural s---, and all the pcs were vampires. I roll up a gun runner and the dm has me roll on a giant table to see what was in my arsenal. I end up sitting on a of combloc weaponry and some cocaine. By some insane luck I had also gotten my hands on an old soviet satchel nuke boat, a few warehouses full I went to meet the party, as their old arms dealer got pinched by the ATF. They told me to bring the best of my stock. They were promising big money (years of playing GTA had conditioned them to believe a $12 AK is worth over $10000) so I brought along the nuke, just in case □ GreyThrkreen 09/20/09(Sun)18:12 No.5942545團困 sx Satchel nuke? OH jesus christ Wasteland Warrior lW48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:23 No.5942653 So l show up, at midnight with a u haul full of guns and some explosives. I was showing them the different guns I had and their bill ended up totaling just shy of $500,000. The leader of the group was a chick who had turned all the other pcs and kept them around as mooks/boytoys. She told me they would pay me in another way, and she motioned for them to grab me while bearing her fangs. Ive always been afraid of vampires, and this s--- was creeping me out. I backpedaled and tried to get them not to bite me. Eventually I managed to get them to accept the first load of guns in exchange for not draining me. I then made sure that any meeting I had with the vamps happened while I had a large gun and access to some UV flash grenades I whipped up for the occaision. Each time we dealt with each other the chick kept telling me sooner or later that I would be hers. Vamps creep me out, so I resisted to the last. It was getting wierd though, the party spent less and less time fighting rival covens of vampires and more time trying to catch me without a big gun □ wasteland warrior M/48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:35 No. 5942792 The rest of the party met outside of game and plotted to catch me off guard. They told me that they had found someone who wanted to buy the satchel nuke, and they would arrange a meeting in a nightclub the chick owned. They also bought my character a very nice nickel plated 1911 with pearl grips, as a way to show they had no hard feelings. It was crafted with a safety that could be engaged remotely. I couldn't find anything wrong with the gun and when I tested it out I realized it was a master crafted weapon. Just to be on the safe side I loaded it with silver rounds just to be on side. I show up at the club dragging the e with me be on the Wasteland Warrior !W48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:53 No.5942963團困 I decided as a show of good faith, to show up dressed formally instead of in tactical gear like our normal meetings. They showed up dressed accordingly and were even polite and cordial. The guys carried in my 50kg portable nuke and the gal told the doorman to let me carry my piece inside. They even told me that t and enjoyed a bottle of aged brandy. The dm kept telling me to make perception checks, which I kept failing an them and told them I would be on my merry way, then with a s--- eating grin the chick pulled the trigger. Nothing, they activated the remote safety and screwed me over. I lunged for the bomb but one of them caught me and I was dragged to the center of the dance floor which had been cleared out. Turns out the perception checks were too notice that everyone at the club was either a vampire, or bearing a tattoo that marked them as property. The chick gives a speech about how the nuke will give them leverage should the authorities prove uncorrectable, and soon the city would be theirs Then she jumped on me, fed on me and forced me to drink some of her blood. Then she r---- me, in full view of the assembled vampires to mark me as hers could negotiate the price of the on my terms, while l sat at our table y they come back, with $20,0 Twice what I wanted for the nuke. I thanked d me I would have to wait till after the ceremony. I immediately pulled my brand new gun out of my jacket and but I wanted vengeanc ow ext wee d played along like I wa ppy part of the flock ave an d Warrior M/48S2eY4n 09/20/09(Sun)19:21 No. 5943 185 I couldn't just kill the party, I had to royally f--- them up to get any measure of revenge. I started attacking law enforcement personnel and key members of the community. I was being the guy at a vampire the masquerade game who apartment complex. Party wa Il vampires" while firing a shotgun into the air. No subtlety or stealth at all. The party wan Ith kill a hunter, I would blow up hi rt biting people left and right and letting them live and go running off to the authorities. I was even sending videotaped evidence of our crimes to TV city goes on a manhunt for a bunch of drugged out crazies who are biting their victems. A group of paranormal investigator tations. Sooner or later th decides thousand rounds of ammunition and some grenades. I walk right into the front of th vampi y think I'm perfect for the job, as Ive abandoned subtlety. I grab a man portable minigun, several ing guy comes out and says and show o make large messy example of them. I volunteer to go to town on them and man who's in cha A little nervous look im that nder, and would be perfectly willi ist in the operations. I let them take blood t s in charge, and he's willing to die them how to make the UV grenades. The other players are flipping s---, and declare war on the city. They had some quick victories, but the inability to move in the daytime and public acknowledgment of them screwed them, and soon the national guard was patrolling with rifles with UV lamp tac lights and flamethrowers Wasteland Warrior IW48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)19:21 No.5943194 As a final act of desperation they hole up in an old mansion and threaten to detonate the nuke if the city doesnt submit to their demands. They demand me, a complete cessation of hostilities and $20,000,000,000, so they can buy out some African s------- and start their empire somewhere howed up with a brie e and walked right o the chick. Predictably she was sitting right She rted taunting me about how they were to kill me, they were going to keep me as their slave. She told me to open the brief case, and d and pulled out a UV ext to the grenade. She laughed and said I didn't have the guts to kill myself. I chuckled and said "they found a cure" and I pulled the pin I was a hero and the head of the paranormal CIA, they were piles of ash. I think I won
| Wasteland warrior NV48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:11 No.5942529 The next bad player story was also a bad dm story, but mostly do to his permissive attitude. I was told it was a d20 modern game and that was it. What he didn't tell me was that it was chock full of the supernatural s---, and all the pcs were vampires. I roll up a gun runner and the dm has me roll on a giant table to see what was in my arsenal. I end up sitting on a of combloc weaponry and some cocaine. By some insane luck I had also gotten my hands on an old soviet satchel nuke boat, a few warehouses full I went to meet the party, as their old arms dealer got pinched by the ATF. They told me to bring the best of my stock. They were promising big money (years of playing GTA had conditioned them to believe a $12 AK is worth over $10000) so I brought along the nuke, just in case □ GreyThrkreen 09/20/09(Sun)18:12 No.5942545團困 sx Satchel nuke? OH jesus christ Wasteland Warrior lW48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:23 No.5942653 So l show up, at midnight with a u haul full of guns and some explosives. I was showing them the different guns I had and their bill ended up totaling just shy of $500,000. The leader of the group was a chick who had turned all the other pcs and kept them around as mooks/boytoys. She told me they would pay me in another way, and she motioned for them to grab me while bearing her fangs. Ive always been afraid of vampires, and this s--- was creeping me out. I backpedaled and tried to get them not to bite me. Eventually I managed to get them to accept the first load of guns in exchange for not draining me. I then made sure that any meeting I had with the vamps happened while I had a large gun and access to some UV flash grenades I whipped up for the occaision. Each time we dealt with each other the chick kept telling me sooner or later that I would be hers. Vamps creep me out, so I resisted to the last. It was getting wierd though, the party spent less and less time fighting rival covens of vampires and more time trying to catch me without a big gun □ wasteland warrior M/48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:35 No. 5942792 The rest of the party met outside of game and plotted to catch me off guard. They told me that they had found someone who wanted to buy the satchel nuke, and they would arrange a meeting in a nightclub the chick owned. They also bought my character a very nice nickel plated 1911 with pearl grips, as a way to show they had no hard feelings. It was crafted with a safety that could be engaged remotely. I couldn't find anything wrong with the gun and when I tested it out I realized it was a master crafted weapon. Just to be on the safe side I loaded it with silver rounds just to be on side. I show up at the club dragging the e with me be on the Wasteland Warrior !W48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)18:53 No.5942963團困 I decided as a show of good faith, to show up dressed formally instead of in tactical gear like our normal meetings. They showed up dressed accordingly and were even polite and cordial. The guys carried in my 50kg portable nuke and the gal told the doorman to let me carry my piece inside. They even told me that t and enjoyed a bottle of aged brandy. The dm kept telling me to make perception checks, which I kept failing an them and told them I would be on my merry way, then with a s--- eating grin the chick pulled the trigger. Nothing, they activated the remote safety and screwed me over. I lunged for the bomb but one of them caught me and I was dragged to the center of the dance floor which had been cleared out. Turns out the perception checks were too notice that everyone at the club was either a vampire, or bearing a tattoo that marked them as property. The chick gives a speech about how the nuke will give them leverage should the authorities prove uncorrectable, and soon the city would be theirs Then she jumped on me, fed on me and forced me to drink some of her blood. Then she r---- me, in full view of the assembled vampires to mark me as hers could negotiate the price of the on my terms, while l sat at our table y they come back, with $20,0 Twice what I wanted for the nuke. I thanked d me I would have to wait till after the ceremony. I immediately pulled my brand new gun out of my jacket and but I wanted vengeanc ow ext wee d played along like I wa ppy part of the flock ave an d Warrior M/48S2eY4n 09/20/09(Sun)19:21 No. 5943 185 I couldn't just kill the party, I had to royally f--- them up to get any measure of revenge. I started attacking law enforcement personnel and key members of the community. I was being the guy at a vampire the masquerade game who apartment complex. Party wa Il vampires" while firing a shotgun into the air. No subtlety or stealth at all. The party wan Ith kill a hunter, I would blow up hi rt biting people left and right and letting them live and go running off to the authorities. I was even sending videotaped evidence of our crimes to TV city goes on a manhunt for a bunch of drugged out crazies who are biting their victems. A group of paranormal investigator tations. Sooner or later th decides thousand rounds of ammunition and some grenades. I walk right into the front of th vampi y think I'm perfect for the job, as Ive abandoned subtlety. I grab a man portable minigun, several ing guy comes out and says and show o make large messy example of them. I volunteer to go to town on them and man who's in cha A little nervous look im that nder, and would be perfectly willi ist in the operations. I let them take blood t s in charge, and he's willing to die them how to make the UV grenades. The other players are flipping s---, and declare war on the city. They had some quick victories, but the inability to move in the daytime and public acknowledgment of them screwed them, and soon the national guard was patrolling with rifles with UV lamp tac lights and flamethrowers Wasteland Warrior IW48S2eY4nU 09/20/09(Sun)19:21 No.5943194 As a final act of desperation they hole up in an old mansion and threaten to detonate the nuke if the city doesnt submit to their demands. They demand me, a complete cessation of hostilities and $20,000,000,000, so they can buy out some African s------- and start their empire somewhere howed up with a brie e and walked right o the chick. Predictably she was sitting right She rted taunting me about how they were to kill me, they were going to keep me as their slave. She told me to open the brief case, and d and pulled out a UV ext to the grenade. She laughed and said I didn't have the guts to kill myself. I chuckled and said "they found a cure" and I pulled the pin I was a hero and the head of the paranormal CIA, they were piles of ash. I think I won

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Saint cuthbert

□ Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)21:00 No.10699700 Hide團困 File1277341219 jpg-(19 KB, 210x330, keldorn.jpg) Ive had a brow-beating atheist hate on my cleric before, calling him weak for worshipping a god THAT didnt last long. I cast an extended Command on him, and proceeded to sit down with him, explaining how St. Cuthbert laid out the law in the land, and how his clerics are in charge of keeping the peace of the land. How we are the ones who police the wilder lands and roads from brigands and highwaymen. How we break down criminal organizations that would exploit slavery and harmful narcotics I explained to him, that St. Cuthbert did not care if he did not acknowledge him as his spiritual liege. As long as he kept himself within the law. And the player of this human fighter hated every minute of it. Next session, he attempted to kill me, in a duel, when my spell slots were low. I stil managed to kill him, this time with a Wrack spell that I had intended to use that day, but could not. I used Wrack to make him helpless while I crushed his skull with a coup de grace. My last words were "Judge Balthazar finds you wanting, and by the power invested upon my by St. Cuthbert, I find you guilty upon one count of treachery of a comrade. This was the last thing h saw: A full-plate armored, bald man. Short, with green eyes. A bit older. A mace raised in two hands, above his head The party did not interfere. We took his stuff, and sold it off, to help our cause. I gave my share to the church of St. Cuthbert in my hometown, which was used to fund a better training complex for the town guard. They put a plaque on the wall, dedicating this building to him
□ Anonymous 06/23/10(Wed)21:00 No.10699700 Hide團困 File1277341219 jpg-(19 KB, 210x330, keldorn.jpg) Ive had a brow-beating atheist hate on my cleric before, calling him weak for worshipping a god THAT didnt last long. I cast an extended Command on him, and proceeded to sit down with him, explaining how St. Cuthbert laid out the law in the land, and how his clerics are in charge of keeping the peace of the land. How we are the ones who police the wilder lands and roads from brigands and highwaymen. How we break down criminal organizations that would exploit slavery and harmful narcotics I explained to him, that St. Cuthbert did not care if he did not acknowledge him as his spiritual liege. As long as he kept himself within the law. And the player of this human fighter hated every minute of it. Next session, he attempted to kill me, in a duel, when my spell slots were low. I stil managed to kill him, this time with a Wrack spell that I had intended to use that day, but could not. I used Wrack to make him helpless while I crushed his skull with a coup de grace. My last words were "Judge Balthazar finds you wanting, and by the power invested upon my by St. Cuthbert, I find you guilty upon one count of treachery of a comrade. This was the last thing h saw: A full-plate armored, bald man. Short, with green eyes. A bit older. A mace raised in two hands, above his head The party did not interfere. We took his stuff, and sold it off, to help our cause. I gave my share to the church of St. Cuthbert in my hometown, which was used to fund a better training complex for the town guard. They put a plaque on the wall, dedicating this building to him

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8chan 4chan greentext /tg/ traditional games