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: Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)09:36:07 No.856740195 >get home from 9-5 job >want a way to unwind >here the lads mention this mysterious realm called 4chan >type in 4chan.org >there's a giant p--- ad at the top of the 40 KB JPG screen >w-- >lightbulb in the brain >go to webstore >get adblocker >go back to 4chan >p--- ad gone >victory >click on /b/ >it's all people posting p--- >log off and cry myself to sleep

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: Anonymous (ID: FZpC9sjR 05/10/25(Sat)23:52:14 No.504439159 UK woman loses jail term appeal after killing man as he sexually assaulted her BLUNDERS AND TRAGEDY FAILED BY THE STATE >get r---- at 14 and r----- not charged >carry a knife and stab second r----- >life in prison Why is self defense illegal in bongladesh? >>504439159 (OP) # >oi, hick hoe, why u got no loicense 4 dat knoife? >>504439159 (OP) # >bongladesh Kek many such cases in bongostan gott strafe angloids >>504439159 (OP) # >bongladesh kek well done lad

Anonymous YouTube 3 KB PNG 05/09/25(Fri)04:12:58 No.105206511 >>ayoo wassup youtube, cumguzzler420 here! this video was brought to you by [mental health scam] and [predatory gambling mobileshit] and who could forget [scam VPN that has been breached 9001 times] >video is interrupted by youtube showing crypto scam and health scam that gets people killed >video gets interrupted again showing Al voice shilling some garbage, Al Waifu, and some guy who invented the dehumidifier for the 7000th time >>don't forget to like and subscribe and thanks for Goyslop Inc. for sponsoring this video! Name a more cancerous website

Anonymous 05/10/25(Sat)20:37:35 No.709431576 >game has 4 wikis 22 KB JPG

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Anon has a panic attack | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/28/18(Sun)18:44:16 No.48965458 >think about moving arm >moves arm >just moved matter using nothing but my mind how? >have panic attack 150 KB PNG

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Anon just wants meth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/19(Sat)01:59:03 No.789153378 >be me, junkie >sitting in a dark ass alley, trying to kill the bedbugs with meth smoke >see a couple walk by, well dressed, clearly have money >takewhatsyours.wav >jump out of the alley and say >"look! No one needs to get hurt just give me your 211 KB JPG money wallet and purse" >the guy says "oh so you wanna hold my wife down and force your c--- into her ass while I watch helplessly from across the street huh??!" >wait..what? >he pulls his wife's pants down and runs across the street >she looks at me and licks her lips >mfw I just wanted some f------ meth you f------ cucks.

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Anon gets told a bedtime story | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/11/21(Fri)01:26:03 No.4510610 Gotta shleep. Any stories recommended? 36 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/11/21(Fri)02:51:01 No.4510808 there once was a man named enis >>4510821 # : Anonymous 06/11/21(Fri)03:28:38 No.4510821 >>4510808 # continue... >>4510836 # : Anonymous 06/11/21(Fri)03:56:36 No.4510836 >>4510821 # Penis >>4510853 # : Anonymous 06/11/21(Fri)03:59:51 No.4510853 >>4510836 # 24 KB JPG

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Anon posts the biggest cope | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)12:14:59 No.64126780 >tfw too high iq to be fulfilled by sex and relationship 379 KB JPG 11 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)12:39:01 No.64127018 >>64126780 (OP) # a repeatedly debunked pseudo-science tests tells me my brain number is high so thats why I can't get laid! might asw just say it's cause you're a scorpio or some s---, d------- you can can't get laid cause you **think** ur big brain very smart

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Anon is paranoid | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous They know 07/27/18(Fri)19:19:29 No.1952343E >be me >fap >go out in public THEY KNOW 551 KB PNG

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Anon isn’t as funny as chad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)07:55:57 No.64128231 >At a study session with my uni group >Our group and another group sharing a table >librarian comes over and asks if she can help with anything >Popular guy says "I'll have a steak 34 KB JPG thanks" >Librarian laughs and says "this is a library, not a restaurant" >Popular guy whispers "sorry, l'll have a steak please" >Everyone laughs >l also say whisper "I'll have a steak too please" >No one laughs I don't understand bros. I literally made the EXACT same joke. Why is it only funny when this stupid Chad faced prick says it : Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)08:02:44 No.64128284 >>64128231 (OP) # because you stole the joke you unoriginal sperg. dont just steal his s---, its obvious that's what you tried to do, steal his shine : Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)08:04:14 No.64128298 >>64128231 (OP) # >chad can come up with jokes like these on the spot F--- me, what a god tier ability to seduce everything around you, including males >>64128306 #

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Anon gets the B o o $ i | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Sex stories 08/08/18(Wed)16:44:22 No.47367272 Sex stories /r9k/, I'll start >be me >15 beta >playing halo with friend at his house >a female i didnt know was here walks in >beautiful green eyes, black hair >"hi rose" 33 KB JPG >introduces me to rose, she just watches us play for a while >friend has to go to appointment, needs new glasses >he tells me to just play with rose until he's back >he leaves with his dad >she doesnt want to play halo so just watches me for another while >out of nowhere sally just sits on my lap and starts rubbing my chest >suddenly get a huge boost in confidence >feelsgoodman.jpg >l am a curious 15 year old, take the opportunity with my new confidence >turn her over and pound her hard >thank kek for my curiosity that led me to this moment >she is literally screaming, pretty sure its pleasure >its getting too loud >because of her screaming i didnt hear his dads car pull into the driveway >the screaming suddenly stops and she stops breathing >w--.jpg >l now realize my friend and his dad are home >he bursts into the room, not expecting to see me with my d--- inside rose who is now dead >mfw my curiosity killed my friends family cat

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Anon slept well | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/12/17(Thu)23:00:07 No.40366294 >love having pressure on top of me >buy a weighted blanket so I can have something snug and warm lay on top of me and feel like l'm being hugged 96 KB JPG >do more research >find out weighted blankets are made for autistic kids oh no

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Anon's goals are beyond our understanding | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/09/21(Wed)19:33:35 No.856438904 >Your daughter comes out as a lesbian How do you react? 98 KB JPG 83 Replies / 5 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/09/21(Wed)22:45:29 No.856448735 >>856438904(OP)_# >Your daughter comes out as a lesbian If I have a daughter she will be forced to be a lesbian, ain't no way I'm letting her get dicked.

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At least anon tried | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 minuti fa 44099910 >at the bus stop >its raining >notice qt girl >shes getting drenched >place my umbrella over her >"umm no thanks" >takes five steps back 2 REPLIES

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Anon accidentally made his Chickens evolve. | /r/Greentext

>>36098782 (OP) # >have a chicken coop RESRET NOTHING >mice come for free gimmidats 422 KB GIF >have an old air rifle >decide to go full swat >rush in to catch mice off-guard >its very hard to hit a small moving target with a single shot rifle >shot one in the back, it couldn't move but it was still alive >chickens sense the distress and go full t-rex mode >now they acquired the taste for mice >chickens now actively hunt mice >mfw the problem has solved itself >>36117422 # >>36121592 #

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Elon guy #standwithelon to show him respect crypto coin . | /r/Greentext

You come home from a crappy day of work. You unlock your door, only to see Elon standing in your living room. There's a large cardboard box next to him. >"Hey, Anon-kun. Sometimes life is full of hardships. You're a good friend, so I 155 KB JPG thought you should have this. Enjoy, buddy." He walks to you and briefly places his hand on your shoulder before taking his leave. There's a noise heard coming from inside the box. >"Nyan?" #standwithelon-Coin

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Greentext Stories - Anon just wants to relax | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)09:36:07 No.856740195 >get home from 9-5 job >want a way to unwind >here the lads mention this mysterious realm called 4chan >type in 4chan.org >there's a giant p--- ad at the top of the 40 KB JPG screen >w-- >lightbulb in the brain >go to webstore >get adblocker >go back to 4chan >p--- ad gone >victory >click on /b/ >it's all people posting p--- >log off and cry myself to sleep

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