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: Anonymous 02/14/22(Mon)19:50:05 No.67429523 >be grandma >born before WWI Nova moda: 'After sex selfie' Selfie pos-sexD >lost her parents in a boating accident, at age 7 >went to live with her a------ uncle and his wife 33 KB JPG >grandma's uncle caught grandma and her "boyfriend" holding hands in the town's square >uncle decided to kick her out of his house because of it, when she was 17 >fast forward a few years >grandma gets married >has four kids >her husband (my grandpa) dies in a car accident, when the youngest kid isn't even 2 years old yet >she ends up raising the children alone, struggling financially >fast forward a couple of decades >diagnosed with cancer >after two years of treatment, she gets better >despite everything that she's gone through, she's the sweetest person that l've ever met What's your excuse to be a jaded, intolerant, cynical, a------, anon?

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon’s Clock | /r/Greentext

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Anon is saved | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)17:26:22 No.857517553 >WE SAVED HIM! Yes! We did it team! We can keep him alive for decades! Sure he has no legs, no penis, no bottom half at all in fact, he'll never do anything sexual again. He'll never have children. He has no right arm, has to eject bodily waste into a bag for the rest of his life, can't work a job ever again, can't do anything physical ever again, will have a very difficult time playing video games or operating a computer, he will need a care taker 170 KB JPG for the rest of his life, will be a drain on society, a depressing burden on his family, and will ptobably begin to mentally deteriorate and suffer once reality sets in that this will be the rest of his life until he dies, but that's okay, because we saved him. If this happened to an animal like a dog or a cat we'd put the animal down to end its suffering out of the kindness of our hearts, but not here, here, we saved him and he can live and live and live and if he ever tries to commit suicide we will easily put him on 24/7 Suicide watch to ensure he can live out his life to the fullest! We can keep him alive to suffer for decades! We are heroes. 82 Replies / 23 Images View Thread

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Anon has elons number. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/14/22(Mon)07:32:57 No.872670361 >tortured and killed 15 monkeys with diabolical brain chips >couldn't make Roadster (a car) >couldn't make Cybertruck (an ugly car) >couldn't make Loop (a tunnel, literally) >currently trashing Earth orbit with 156 KB JPG Starlink >thinks wasting nuclear power by nuking Mars is a good idea You guys sure this is real life Tony Stark? 6 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 02/14/22(Mon)07:50:57 No.872671060 elon musk when you ask about child labor and the cobalt mines instead of shitcoin status or his favorite meme If you don't shut your f------ mouth, I will kill you. 1641579968291.jpg 187 KB JPG

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Negative feedback loop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/22(Tue)00:58:23 No.872692168 >call an uber >female as driver >drives insanely good, reaching the location asap >gives me a happy goodbye >i give 1 star because its a woman 119 KB JPG

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Anon is a stoic | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)09:06:41 No.10531852 >walking home at night >pass a group of youths >one of them tells me I dropped my gay card >I look down for it and realise I've been the victim of a practical joke >l am unmoved, I tell the youth that his provocations are futile because I am a stoic >he bursts out laughing and says it's pronounced stow-ic, not stoike >break down and cry in the street >>10532164 # >>10532217 # >>10532453 # >>10532459 #31

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Anon doesn’t care about credit score | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/15/21(Wed)12:10:38 No.868661503 17B752C4-1076-4FD6-AE43-2A990CF9B68B.jpg 79 KB JPG Yea the US has free healthcare >it called never paying the bill and disputing all Collections

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When to autists live together | /r/Greentext

>room mate is a sperg >only ever eats cup noodles and Tim Tams (google if you don't know) >get drunk a few times and eat all his Tim Tams >he gets up in the morning and asks "did you eat all of my Tim tams?" 14 KB PNG >"...no, dunno what you're talking about mate." >he decides to loudly count out how many tim tams he has left every night to make sure I don't eat them >counts them the next morning too >decide to f--- with him >every week or so l'll buy a sleeve of Tim Tams and add one to his packet after he counts at night >first couple of times confuses him a bit >after a couple of months he asks me “...uh hey..uhhhh... have you been adding Tim tams to packets?" >"...have I been adding Tim tams? Why would I do that?" >"oh... uhhh... never mind" >"...okay?" Not much of a prank but because he is a sperg I can see it really f--- with him every time he goes into the kitchen 3 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 02/13/22(Sun)22:56:03 No.872643777 >>872643723 (OP) # you actually sound like the sperg one : Anonymous 02/13/22(Sun)22:56:46 No.872643811 quality : Anonymous 02/13/22(Sun)22:56:53 No.872643816 >>872643723 (OP) # the best fun that a few pounds has ever bought anyone

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Pull out the journal... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/14/22(Mon)17:41:23 No.872652462 >be me >married >lets have a baby >no caffeine, alcohol or much sugar >walk everyday >wife finds out she is pregnant >super happy, going to be a good dad >start a journal, write every day about how 643 KB JPG i want to be a good dad >maybe kid will read it when im dead >8 week appointment, ultrasound, heart beat, incredible moment, dawns on me, feel great >everything looks great >liberal doctor wants wife to get covid vax >wife says shes not comfortable with it yet >wife works from home, healthy and fit, so low threat >Dr convinces her, says if she gets it, it will be bad fast forward 3 weeks to today >at work >get call to come home >miscarriage I literally wrote in a journal for the first time in my life. I feel so stupid. No one is going to read it. I actually thought it was a cool idea, writing about her cravings, things happening and ideas to do. Figured it would be fun to look back on in 20 years or so. Literally so f------ stupid. Now I have to tell my family to ignore the ultrasound photos i sent because its dead. This was all so stupid. We had a stupid pregnancy revel at Christmas with my mom. How f------ stupid is that. My brother sent me a "big brother" bandana for my dog. Its so f------ stupid. All of it was f------ stupid. I bought her the new pokemon game last week and shes been playing it for the last hour after I calmed her down. I just opened my laptop in the other room. I actually thought I would be a good dad.

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Anon rewrites spiderman the right way | /r/Greentext

File. Uncle-Bens-Death-Spider-M.ipg (40 KB, 612x380) Anonymous 02/14/17(Tue)17:54:15 No.79436536 >>79437262 >>79438649 >>79438655 >>79438700 >He was white, Peter. >All these years protesting the Civil Rights Act, and one of my own gets me >Was I wrong bay? >Uncle Ben-he-he looked Italian >Oh Peter, thank you. >[Uncle Ben dies smiling] Powerful stuff. Anonymous 02/14/17(Tue)17:55:38 No.79436581 10/10

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Anon discusses cannonballs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/18/21(Wed)14:29:03 No.50279407 R(13).jpg 72 KB JPG >Dude a big ball landing near you somehow causes an explosion and kills you You expect me to believe this s---?

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Anon has some advice for you. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/16/21(Thu)21:43:30 No.64778471 Never prepared those myself before. What is the secret to make them tasty? 459 KB JPG 64 Replies / 8 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)06:31:17 No.64782935 >>64778471 (OP) # Eat them raw while pretending to be an enormous dinosaur 62 KB JPG devouring tiny trees >>64783160 #

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Anons try to predict scenes from the LOTR show | /r/Greentext

>>163536246 (OP). >White male ranger is tracking down a person the group is trying to find - kind of like Aragorn did in the 2 towers movie. >He was established previously as a good tracker and ranger >He's at the end of his ropes and can't follow the tracks >That's when diverse, female character number 4 appears, looks down on the ranger in visible disgust and instantly finds the correct trail, despite not having any previous experience as a tracker. >The whole group is praising her, as they keep walking, past the white male tracker, who looks down on the ground, disappointed in himself From this point on, him trying to track something becomes a running gag throughout the show, because literally everyone else (who is not white) can find what the group is looking for faster than him. >innocent family of black eleven peasants try to ride their cart through the city gate >overweight YT Guard with a southern accent asks for their registration >"you wouldn't be asking me this if I wasn't ELVEN" he declares in an extremely articulate voice >evil guard drags him from his cart and slams him on the ground while several more approach for the racial beating >his proud black lesbian wildcard don't-take-s----from-no-one daughter gets up to save her dad from racism >"no, my daughter! I'll survive this torment just and our ancestors have. We must endure as they did" >wide shot of a crowd of white women turning their heads away in shame His daughters name? Gil-Galad >>163536246 (OP). There will be at least one scene where a male, probably white, will act like a coward and say maybe they should give up or try to run away and a strong BIPOC woman will give a rousing speech that rally everyone to keep fighting. >there is a female wizard >[Insert Name here] the Yellow >she is way more powerful than Gandalf in every conceivable way >it remains unexplained why that is and why she was never mentioned before in the lore >she does sassy one-liners >group of sweaty Dwarf blacksmiths sit around a broken blade >"Our Guild of Smiths tried to reforge the Galdring for a generation and we simply failed, it can't be done..." >woman walks by and says: >"have you tried adding a sprinkle of Mithril during the smelting?" >they Dwarves do a comical head turn >hardcut to the reforged Sword in the hand of its rightful owner >a "clever" one liner about "why not use the eagles?" >>163536246 (OP) >two male knights starting kissing each other after winning a battle

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Greentext Stories - Matron Saint | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 02/14/22(Mon)19:50:05 No.67429523 >be grandma >born before WWI Nova moda: 'After sex selfie' Selfie pos-sexD >lost her parents in a boating accident, at age 7 >went to live with her a------ uncle and his wife 33 KB JPG >grandma's uncle caught grandma and her "boyfriend" holding hands in the town's square >uncle decided to kick her out of his house because of it, when she was 17 >fast forward a few years >grandma gets married >has four kids >her husband (my grandpa) dies in a car accident, when the youngest kid isn't even 2 years old yet >she ends up raising the children alone, struggling financially >fast forward a couple of decades >diagnosed with cancer >after two years of treatment, she gets better >despite everything that she's gone through, she's the sweetest person that l've ever met What's your excuse to be a jaded, intolerant, cynical, a------, anon?

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