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: Anonymous 06/27/22(Mon) 07:46:37 No.880896681 >be me, 22yo femanon >on bumble >get asked on date with slightly older anon 138 KB JPG >say yes, freeicecream.jpg >we get to ice cream shop >mostly silence for first several minutes >ask him if hes excited about getting his masters >says no hes dreading it >starts rambling about "existential anxiety" >ohfuck.exe >begins explaining to me theres no good or evil >ask him w-- he means >says chimps kill babies and r--- eachother >asks if i feel better >say kinda >he says lets go wtfjusthappened, was he f------ with me?

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext recipe font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File size: 355 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anons brother has braincel damagemaxx | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 58 KB JPG 06/29/22 (Wed)23:26:07 No.69225352 >brother is an incel >or was one, can't really be called anything nowadays >he was extremely deep into the subculture >tried hanging himself in December >we managed to save him at basically the last second >but he got major brain damage >ever since recovering, he can't form a meaningful sentence, and every other word he says has the suffix "-cel" attached to it >basically sounds like Boomhauer except reading the incel wiki >for example, we were making some porridge for him to eat recently, since he has trouble swallowing >kept calling us "porridgecels" and "breakfastcels" all other sorts of nonsense insults with "-cel" attached >whenever the news comes on, he starts hurling racial epithets with "-cel" attached (you can guess what they're like) >also attaches "-maxx" to random words, like "I'm hungrymaxxed" or "I need to shitmaxx" >threw a coke can at the Amazon delivery guy today and called him a "wagemaxxed mailcel" : Anonymous Put me in the screencap for Reddit, thanks. 06/29/22(Wed)23:29:17 No.69225369 Anonymous 2 KB JPG : Anonymous 66 KB JPG Anonymous 06/30/22(Thu)00:16:34 No.69225667 347 KB PNG >>69225352 (OP) # Has he been having kekvulsions since the brain-cel damage? 06/30/22(Thu)00:18:03 No.69225673 >>69225352 (OP) # >threw a coke can at the Amazon delivery guy today and called him a "wagemaxxed mailcel" Is this your brother? : Anonymous >>69225352 (OP) # PUT ME IN SCREENIE DAMMIT. I was here. 06/30/22(Thu)00:35:08 No.69225799 06/30/22(Thu)00:37:37 No.69225820 >>69225352 (OP) # >wagemaxxed mailcel My god your brother is like Neo. He sees through the Matrix. He is the one.

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Feels bad man | /r/Greentext

1C696DEB-2A1B-4275-8260-886BCD4B1BD1.jpg 89 KB JPG >Be me, a rock >Glacier broke me off of my mother rock and deposited me inside a hill >FFW a couple of billion years, some guys dig me up. Sit me on top of the hill. Nice view >They tell me I'm a glacier erratic and one of the biggest they've ever found >They name me after this guy Chamberlin who studied glacier geology. He was all about my family and me. >Feels good man >A newspaper called my another name one time >These people called social justice warriors are upset about that name they called me that one time >They say I make them feel sad >Men with a big truck pick me up and move me somewhere else. >I miss my hill >I'm just a rock guys. I'm not racist.

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Anon's tracking investment pays off | /r/Greentext

5m (9/20 9:39) 863436421 2 Re 2 Img JPG 1MB (1080 x 2220) 1 Reply >superglue GPS tracker to bicycle >leave it unlocked infront of my apartment >wait for people to steal it >chase them in my car, get out and kick their ass >take their wallets >repeat I made $800 in a month doing this ...

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Anon introduces himself to his new girlfriend's mom. | /r/Greentext

>Be shy 17 year old >Meet girl at a party >She is pretty >Always wants to touch, sit on lap etc. >Party ends 87 KB PNG >She proposes to go on a walk >Agree, have small nice talk outside >She then asks me to come to her house >Yes23.jpg >Grsbs my hand, practically tows me to her house >Go in, have sex >Sweaty, go to her kitchen to grab drink >Her mom is there >Im naked >brain_shudown.gif >Grab her hand and say "Hello, my name is Anon" I will never forget

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Anon likes fancy food | /r/Greentext

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Anon can't escape his past | /r/Greentext

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Anon plays a game with balloons... | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: ateH+IMA Confession Thread 02/08/22 (Tue) 18:40:04 No.360262889 When I was 9, my neighbor had a birthday party in her backyard complete with hired clown and tons of helium balloons. I gathered about 15 balloons and tied the strings together to make one rope. Then I tied that to the collar of her kitten and, with her and her parents screaming NO! and rushing towards me, I set it aloft. The balloons carried the cat straight up in the air and soon was just a dot in the sky. The father actually assaulted me; he punched me in the head and threw me on the floor. His wife had to hold him back. The girl was screaming and crying hysterically and I ran home. My own parents wanted to kill me and until the day they moved they never spoke to me or my family again. The cat was never recovered. I feel a great deal of shame for that one impulsive act that forever changed me and my parents. I'm sorry. 87 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: JQUUmmcj)L 02/08/22(Tue)18:41:31 No.360263063 : Anonymous (ID: hGwloc0z) 02/08/22(Tue)18:42:19 No.360263156 >>360262889 (OP) # based

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Anon needs cardio training. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.08 MB PNG 06/29/22(Wed) 23:09:03 No.69233656 >finally have sex >it's extremely exhausting >doesn't feel as good as masturbating what the f--- did I feel suicidal for about this for 20 f------ years? I'm so stupid, 06/29/22(Wed) 23:10:24 No.69233671 : Anonymous >>69233656 (OP) # >it's extremely exhausting Lmao at your lack of stamina. Post BMI.

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Anon trolls trannies on leddit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 27 KB JPG 06/28/22(Tue)15:54:37 No.67373030 >be me >regular guy >post myself on r/trans passing to make female to male troons seethe at my perfect physique and say I've had 0 surgeries/ TRT cycles >everyone in the comments just says I look great for a male to female t----- I've never lost so much confidence at once before.

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Anon Experiences Racism... | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 24 KB JPG 04/26/21 (Mon)22:35:28 No.853060753 >Be me black >Be Lightskin >See dumb post on twitter saying cops shouldn't stop black fights >Respond saying thats dumb >Get called a racist >Respond saying i'm black myself >She asks for a pic of my arm with a piece of paper with my twitter name >Send her said picture >Get told that I don't look black >Respond saying i'm lightskin >She legit says "Then your not actually black, You have more white genes >Tell her both of my parents are African American >She says they aren't black either >She blocks me after. Why are people like this

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Sparkling Water | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>69222648 (You) # sparkling water is terrible for your teeth. 06/29/22 (Wed)03:07:08 No.69223091 >>69223255 # Anonymous 06/29/22 (Wed)03:45:34 No.69223255 >>69223091 # C-- is bad for your teeth but you seem to be drinking it all the time.

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Anon tried | /r/Greentext

Anonymous IT'S OVER 8 KB JPG 06/30/22(Thu)00:44:18 No.69231238 >tried asking out a girl >she said no >as she was walking away tried grabbing her arm to tell her that I really loved her >accidentally pulled too hard and she hurt herself >now being charged with assault and battery >court date is next Monday It's over

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Greentext Stories - Anon goes on a date | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 06/27/22(Mon) 07:46:37 No.880896681 >be me, 22yo femanon >on bumble >get asked on date with slightly older anon 138 KB JPG >say yes, freeicecream.jpg >we get to ice cream shop >mostly silence for first several minutes >ask him if hes excited about getting his masters >says no hes dreading it >starts rambling about "existential anxiety" >ohfuck.exe >begins explaining to me theres no good or evil >ask him w-- he means >says chimps kill babies and r--- eachother >asks if i feel better >say kinda >he says lets go wtfjusthappened, was he f------ with me?

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