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Greentext Stories - Anon played the long game | /r/Greentext

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A true story from my youth >be me >extremely depressed with crippling anxiety >finally decide to end it all >take lots of Xanax and wash it 25 KB PNG down with a handle >pass the f--- out >parents find me and rush me to hospital >unfortunately the doctor saves me >two cops come into room and ask me to take drug test >walk to bathroom with dad, qt nurse, and two cops >still extremely intoxicated >me to nurse "can you jack me off?" >dad in shock "did he really just say that?" >nurse "yes" >I don't hear my dad and I think the nurse said yes to my question >turn back to dad and say "later virgin" >mfw I called my dad a virgin

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