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: Anonymous 55x55 11/18/22(Fri)17:55:45 No.889318180 6b889127a5861653fa9543e46c699e8e32642910b7a2b57773cf5 89 KB JPG >be me >stoned with friend >heart randomly starts racing and I feel like I can't breathe >look over to my friend and say I think I'm having a heart attack and we should call 911 >friend grabs me tells me to stay calm and takes me to the shower >turns on the cold water, tells me to get in and put my face under >hands me a towel and tells me to trust him >he leaves >I do as told >hearts slows down almost immediately after I put my face into the water >finish up, dry off, and get out >he hands me a glass of milk and turns on some looney tunes >lights a nice smelling candle and chats with me to free my mind >instantly mellow out >glad I have a good friend

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism cartoon

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

File type: jpg

Resolution: (1080px x 1981px)

File size: 215 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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anon works from home | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 274 KB JPG 10/07/22 (Fri)11:05:21 No.89050016 >work remote >get paid 100k/yr >play video games most of my shift This cant be sustainable

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Anon be cooking pasta | /r/Greentext

Anonymous feels good man 08/22/18 (Wed)09:08:49 No.777883934 30 KB JPG >be me >am 17 >am pretty stupid and broke so decide to sell fake drugs >start filling a few bags with oregano and selling to freshmen >kids actually believe it's weed and buy some >mfw they fake being high and then come back to buy more >one day called up to principals office >there's a cop in there >they ask to search my bag >mfw all they find is oregano >mfw I say I'm making pasta after school and my friend gave me some oregano he grew to use >mfw they can't do anything so they send me back to class

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Turkanon cannot handle the truth | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: (WGRC6MKK Moon Knight got review bombed HOMEPAGE TY NEWS Moon Knight: Disney+ Marvel series getting review bombed for mentioning the Armenian Genocide KEY CASUS ROLLING 113 KB JPG 04/05/22(Tue)23:33:07 No.371394597 >be me >Turkish >decide to watch that new show Moon Knight that people have been taking about >start watching Episode 1 One of the characters mentions the Armenian Genocide >immediately turn off show and leave negative review online

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Yellow Army | /r/Greentext

: Yellow Tard Yellow Army Coomer P--- /b/ 124 KB PNG 11/17/22(Thu)21:56:57 No.889270495 P---------- belongs on p--- boards. This board is not one of them. /b/ is for random content. When 80% of the threads are for p----------, it's not random anymore. 4Chan already has boards specifically designed for p----------. These include: >/s/ - Sexy Beautiful Women >/hc/ - Hardcore >/hm/ - Handsome Men >/h/ - Hentai >/e/ - Ecchie (Hentai subgenre) >/d/ - Hentai/Alternative (Hentai subgenre) >/y/ - Yaoi (Hentai subgenre) >/hr/ - High Resolution (celebrity) >/gif/ - Adult Gif >/aco/ - Adult Cartoons >/r/ - Adult Requests

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anon wants to know how to invade America | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/28/20(Fri)10:56:07 No.9348410 How the f--- can you invade it? 08/28/20(Fri)11:09:59 No.9348514 : Anonymous >>9348410 (OP) # You don't. On either side you will hit mountains not soon after the coasts. Imagine getting into protracted warfare with snake-handling Appalachian hillbillies. The last thing you will hear is the sound of a banjo twanging through the trees before you get domed by someone armed with their great-great-grandfather's depression era squirrel rifle. It would make the Chechen-Russian conflict look like a f------ joke.

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anon has an idea | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Briked by Platinum Reality of Saint LLC NEW For Sale $80,000 147 KB JPG : Anonymous neighbors >can spend money on cool s--- instead of working and paying debt >surrounded by nature all day >can have a garden YAY POWENT FACE-TO-FACE 11/07/22(Mon)18:33:31 No.27674371 57 KB JPG is living in a trailer based? >can own a plot of land and he without the rat race or endless debt >big enough for 1 person gives you a couple rooms >you can have privacy and avoid 11/07/22(Mon)19:39:08 No.27674902 >>27674371 (OP) # Only if it's in Sunnyvale.

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Anon spends time with his mom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous My mom is the coolest 29 KB JPG 11/18/22(Fri)16:38:11 No.71034860 >not feeling too well >mom notices >decides she wants to do something with me >sure.jpg >am a massive space nerd, have been wanting to watch For All Makind for the longest time (good show btw I recommend) >she agrees >now every day when I get back from school we sit down and watch an episode >I'll pause every 5 minutes to tell her cool space facts and she seems genuinely interested and not bothered by it at all >feel a little less s----- now Thanks mom >be me >depressed

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Anon Learns | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Town Bailey 97 KB JPG 11/18/22(Fri) 15:01:32 No.889301968 Today I learned that red bull doesn't actually have bull piss in it >when I was 11 I had red bull >It tasted like s---, so I looked at the ingredients Taurine was one of them >Tarus is bull >urine is piss Tarus + urine = Taurine >I just accepted that some people drink processed bull piss, there are weirder foods >earlier on today my friend was drinking a coconut red bull Haha, piss drinker >he looked so confused that I had to explain myself I've been a fool the whole time anons

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anon asks a question | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Lauren Chen @TheLaurenChen 11/18/22(Fri)03:17:14 No.89830375 Thousands of Twitter employees have been fired and the platform is still working fine. Apparently they really weren't needed after all. Elon was right to downsize. Last edited 3:22 AM · Nov 18, 2022 · Twitter for Android 2,448 Retweets 471 Quote Tweets 26.1K Likes z8K4Kq2qHy.png 30 KB PNG >I haven't visited a car mechanic since yesterday and my car is working just fine Are normies really this stupid? In particular, the conservative types.

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anon knows biology | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/18/22(Fri)09:12:35 No.71027940 1643377082409.png 95 KB PNG >father is 5'11" >mother is a m----- at 4'11" >I am a manlet at 5'8" >I should've easily been 6'1" or 6'2" had my dad married a woman of average height If you ever get a girl, don't ever, EVER make this mistake. EVER. Don't EVER let your kids down like that. EVER.

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Anon describes the lifecycle of a roastie working at a bar | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Every roastie that tries worki(...) 108 KB PNG 11/18/22(Fri)10:21:56 No.889293270 >Roastie gets a job at a local bar >"omg excited to start new job!!" >Night 2: "Come see your gurl at Normie's grub n pub " >Night 6: Selfie with 2/10 55 year old bitch "Shoutout to this chick! She makes work bearable!" >Night 9: "ATTENTION MEN: No, your bartender doesn't wanna f--- you! She's not paid a lot so don't hit on her blah blah" >Night 13: "Just a friendly reminder to always always ALWAYS tip and be kind to your servers and always suck their cocks blah blah blah" >Night 21: "OMG I JUST SAW A FIGHT BREAK OUT IN THE BAR TWO DRUNK GUYS IMAGINE THAT OMG DONT TAKE YOUR DRAMA TO A BAR AND DONT DRINK TOO MUCH AT A BAR AND DONT FIGHT AT A BAR ITS SCARY" >Night 25: Already quit

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anon gives his aunt his old laptop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/08/21 (Fri) 18:25:39 No.844343540 Deletehistorywith22.jpg 41 KB JPG >get new laptop >give old one to aunt >suddenly remember i forgot to delete my files and browsing history >mfw

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Greentext Stories - Anon has a good friend | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous 55x55 11/18/22(Fri)17:55:45 No.889318180 6b889127a5861653fa9543e46c699e8e32642910b7a2b57773cf5 89 KB JPG >be me >stoned with friend >heart randomly starts racing and I feel like I can't breathe >look over to my friend and say I think I'm having a heart attack and we should call 911 >friend grabs me tells me to stay calm and takes me to the shower >turns on the cold water, tells me to get in and put my face under >hands me a towel and tells me to trust him >he leaves >I do as told >hearts slows down almost immediately after I put my face into the water >finish up, dry off, and get out >he hands me a glass of milk and turns on some looney tunes >lights a nice smelling candle and chats with me to free my mind >instantly mellow out >glad I have a good friend

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