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60 KB JPG >be me, 67 iq brainlet >need to take a s--- after a long day of school Quasar47 >i go and take the biggest, sweatiest smelly s--- i have in my life >as i go to wipe, i realize its not in the f------ toilet? >i wipe my ass and there is no s---. where is my f------ s--- gone I need answers. 11/19/22(Sat)05:12:01 No.889340418 : Anonymous >>889339793 (OP) # >67 iq I think I see your problem, honestly, even if we could answer your question, you wouldn't be able to understand. 11/19/22(Sat)05:29:28 No.889340909 Anonymous I, for one, would also like to know where the s--- went 11/19/22(Sat)05:31:21 No.889340978 Anonymous >>889339793 (OP) # forgot to pull down your pants buddy 11/19/22(Sat)05:41:59 No.889341320 Anonymous >>889339793 (OP) # Last week I f----- my ass using vegetable oil for lube and when I took a s--- the next morning it was like a shotgun blast of scat just one big puff and my ass was empty. The s--- log had pushed almost completely down the hole and only the tail end was peeking out. I wiped and it was clean. Usually I have to s--- 2-3 times to empty out but not that day. 11/19/22(Sat)05:58:00 No.889341855

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Anons disagree in unison | /r/Greentext

39m (11/29 21:09) · 71187176 · 9 Re. 1 Img JPG 61KB (700 × 641) · 581b406283faa.jpg 2 Replies >you have to approach women first No. 38m (11/29 21:10). 71187196 Exactly my dude. We ain't gotta do s--- 35m (11/29 21:13) · 71187226 >you have to work 33m (11/29 21:15). 71187246 >>71187176 (OP) >you have to leave your house No. 31m (11/29 21:17) · 71187259 1 Reply : >you have to work out, shave your neckbeard, learn to dress and go outside No 27m (11/29 21:21). 71187304 >you have to be around women No.

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Anon makes a blood sacrifice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/17(Fri)15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood 19 KB JPG >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?

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No amount of muscles can hide your autism | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 9 KB JPG 07/24/14(Thu)22:52 No.27786295 >go walking to a new gym by my house everyday >its raining >cute /fit/ receptionist asks me to give her a ride home >"y-yeah s-s-sure" >don't even have a car >oh god what do i do what do i do >in the parking lot keep getting deeper and deeper into the lie >stand in the parking lot for a few seconds >"are you okay?" she asks >start sprinting away from her >sprint all the way to my house >never been to that gym again this was like 4 months ago..

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Ameranon schizo | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: wemwpjIH 11/27/22(Sun)17:30:30 No.406171908 There is a silent war happening between Psychopaths and Schizophrenics. We know that the population numbers are very small for both groups, however one group is more likely to become CEOs (psychopaths) and the other is more likely to become homeless (schizos). This is because schizos are good at pattern recognition, and can notice the psychos. Normies are incapable of seeing psychopaths in front of them, and psychos relish and dominate because of this. Schizos are able to know them on an instinctual level and suss them out in a way that normies never could. Thus there is a constant demoralization campaign against schizos from the tyrant psychos, who seek to use the population against their greatest natural enemy.

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Anon is a tree | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Secret story time: >be me >be tree >have wife beside me >we have many children >we have many friends >we hang around with each other >we stand by each other >we never leaf each other >we be happy >suddenly a wild human appears >takes small pp branch out of pants >jerks it >c--- all over soil >soil close to wife >rain >water drops take c-- into soil >c-- reaches my wife's roots >sudden wide eyes.. Leafs open >she takes every drop >I can't look >I can't look away >I can't an hero 11/29/22(Tue)12:11:03 No.889921177 >mfw I'm forced cuck tree >free me pls

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anon lives in a surrealist painting | /r/Greentext

File: fad0560742203e717145a17c9(...).png (261 KB, 474x415) File: 1330818979295.jpg (22 KB, 397x407) Mom is driving my dad to the hospital Anonymous 11/20/16(Sun)06:17:25 No.67631629 ► >>67631791 >>67634405 >Brother tried to hang himself >He's and idiot and tied the rope across his chest instead of his neck and was hanging off the ceiling for like 20 minutes wondering why he hasn't died. >Heard my dad shout that he was doing it wrong and that he was going to show him the proper way to do it. >Dad tied the noose and put around his neck and jumped >My brother had to cut him down, but dad's is having a hard time breathing. >Now my mother is driving my dad to the hospital and my brother to the mental ward. I f------ hate living in Kentucky. Anonymous Ⓒtfw from Kentucky Anonymous >>67673809 >>67673987 >>67681773 Anonymous 11/21/16(Mon)01:20:05 No.67667871 ► >>67667961 >>67667665 (OP) That s--- is hilarious. Write a comedy show about white trash from Kentucky pls. >Dad came home after the hospital after showing my brother the proper way to use a noose after my brother had tied the rope around his chest. >We have a 2,000$ medical bill from the ER >>67667961 >that is made completely out of doors Huh? >I tell him to pawn or sell his motorcycle to help pay it. >He's going to sell his truck and ride his motorcycle to work, even if it snows. >We are all going to have to ride on the back of his motorcycle if we want to go somewhere. Please get me out get me out get me out of this state I need to get out. Anonymous 11/21/16(Mon)01:22:22 No.67667961 >>67668028 >>67668039 >>67668296 >>67669187 >>67669694 >>67677048 >>67678545 >>67678633 >>67680270 >>67680931 e: it's beenoneofthosedays.jpg (20 KB, 320x240) kuzukuzu 11/21/16(Mon)01:24:03 No.67668028 ► >>67668291 ile: 1455484740807.jpg (57 KB, 282x266) 11/21/16(Mon)01:16:01 No.67667665 >>67667871 This is my family I can't write a show about them. Besides they would f------ know it would probably be me. One time I posted a picture of my neighbors house that is made completely out of doors to a local paper and he came raising hell. >>67667961 >house that is made completely out of doors 11/21/16(Mon)01:24:15 No.67668039 >>67668291 >>67667814 >>67667871 >>67667915 >>67667973 >>67669772 >>67673702 Anonymous 11/21/16(Mon)02:06:06 No.67669694 ► >>67667961 >go to kentucky >neighbours are surrealist paintings Anonymous 11/21/16(Mon)01:29:56 No.67668291 ► >>67668393 >>67668509 >>67668510 >>67668534 >>67668566 >>67668724 >>67668741 >>67669098 >>67669335 >>67669842 >>67671378 >>67672255 >>67673763 >>67674010 >>67677048 >>67677134 >>67677206 >>67678761 >>67678773 >>67678808 >>67678819 >>67679009 >>67679145 >>67680414 >>67680931 >>67680995 >>67683829 >>67683919 >>67684023 File: IMG 20121211 143610 hdr.jpg (1.44 MB, 2448x3264) >>67668028 >>67668039 Yep.... Made completely out of doors. And not only is his house made out of f------ doors, He ALWAYS makes door puns when someone walks by. -

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Anon picks up his bro from school | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 41 KB JPG 11/30/22(Wed)07:29:00 No.71194563 >Walking to our local high school to pick up my little bro >Hes grade nine >When I get there I stay near the end of the property and light a smoke >The bell goes off and kids start leaving >Two kids walk past me playing on switches >Seen my bro play with these two before after school >Theyre arguing whos better a charizard or garchomp (had to look up the second one afterwards) >One of them asks me and another older guy smoking too whos better >I only ever played crystal but I know charizard so I say the dragon >"See I told you charzzy's more fuckable" TheFuckDid ThisKidSay.mp4 >They both keep walking talking about which pokemon have bigger cocks >Me and the other dude just staring at each other >Throws his c-------- saying "My kids into the cod thing not a f-----" >Bro eventually shows up >As we walk back I ask him if he likes pokemon >"Yeah we're all talking about the new one at school"

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Anon is a businessman | /r/Greentext

File: AvbYvKvM_400x400.jpg (35 KB, 400x400) □ Anonymous 11/29/22(Tue)08:01:11 No.27815425 [Reply] ► >>27816956 I TRADED MY CAR ON LINE FOR WEED I TRADED MY CAR ON LINE FOR WEED I TRADED MY CAR ON LINE FOR WEED I TRADED MY CAR ON LINE FOR WEED I TRADED MY CAR ON LINE FOR WEED IM SO STUPID WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY >> 8 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 11/29/22 (Tue)15:59:40 No.27816956 ► >>27817177 >>27815425 (OP) Retarded junkie c---, youd trade your ass for some dope. I pity you and your existence. Get f-----

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Holy Based Theory | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: QtGLbQzk) One excavator 36 KB JPG 03/25/21(Thu)11:33:48 No.313632212 why only one excavator. @O 03/25/21(Thuy11:34:53 No.313632342 Anonymous (ID: K10DLI4U) : Anonymous (ID: bh27XKCQ 03/25/21(Thu)11:35:54 No.313632467 >>313632212 (OP) # how many excavators have you seen in real life? In total? Maybe 100 over the course of your life- with 2 together at most, in one time. My theory is that there are about 50ish excavators in existence, shared across governments. >>313632606 # >>313632647 # >>313632942 # >>313634081 # >>313634372 # >>313634380 # >>313635402 # >>313635512 # >>313636302 # >>313636843 # >>313637711 # >>313637771 # >>313637818 # >>313638460 # >>313638932 # >>313639187 # >>313639207 # >>313639504 # >>313640226 # >>313640500 # >>313641091 # >>313641541 # >>313643474 # >>313644703 # >>313647047 # >>313648253 # >>313649424 # >>313649438 # >>313649750 # >>313649889 # >>313650375 # >>313650607 # >>313651022 # >>313651560 # >>313651612 # >>313651783 # >>313651973 # >>313652257 # >>313652301 # >>313652383 #

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anon is probably, like, 22 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/29/22(Tue)21:27:01 No.71192559 A50FDDAD-92CC-428B-91F5-05838674D204.jpg 148 KB JPG >never got the wife >never got the house >never got the job >never got the car >never got the friends

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Schizo anon and his demons | /r/Greentext

371 KB PNG >>33490814 # : Anonymous 202 KB JPG >>33490864 # >>33486027 (OP) # >the demons watch me s--- and give sports commentary >when i flush, they cheer >they won't stop >>33490894 # 11/29/22(Tue)16:44:10 No.33490814 >>33490777 # stop flushing Anonymous >>33490814 # >trans-atlantic accent >"top of this morning's poop and it looks like anon is having a hard time here! he's grinding one out.." *plop* "..AND WOAH A BIG SPLASH FROM ANON!" *cheer* 11/29/22(Tue) 16:51:44 No.33490864 >"well you saw it here, folks. as you can see anon looks visibly shaken after the fantastic play you just saw. lets get a rewind of that." >"you can see where the expression on his face changed the exact moment when the water touched his bottom." >"water will do that to ya!"

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Anon is 10 steps ahead of the game | /r/Greentext

File: kot.jpg (17 KB, 400x400) Anonymous 11/29/22(Tue)20:50:51 No.71183270 >>71183306 >>71183319 >>71183371 >>71183375 >>71183401 >tfw have to break up with gf because I started to like her too much and if she dumps me first I'd be mindbroken Should I do this at Waffle House, or Taco Bell?

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Greentext Stories - Anon does poop magic | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

60 KB JPG >be me, 67 iq brainlet >need to take a s--- after a long day of school Quasar47 >i go and take the biggest, sweatiest smelly s--- i have in my life >as i go to wipe, i realize its not in the f------ toilet? >i wipe my ass and there is no s---. where is my f------ s--- gone I need answers. 11/19/22(Sat)05:12:01 No.889340418 : Anonymous >>889339793 (OP) # >67 iq I think I see your problem, honestly, even if we could answer your question, you wouldn't be able to understand. 11/19/22(Sat)05:29:28 No.889340909 Anonymous I, for one, would also like to know where the s--- went 11/19/22(Sat)05:31:21 No.889340978 Anonymous >>889339793 (OP) # forgot to pull down your pants buddy 11/19/22(Sat)05:41:59 No.889341320 Anonymous >>889339793 (OP) # Last week I f----- my ass using vegetable oil for lube and when I took a s--- the next morning it was like a shotgun blast of scat just one big puff and my ass was empty. The s--- log had pushed almost completely down the hole and only the tail end was peeking out. I wiped and it was clean. Usually I have to s--- 2-3 times to empty out but not that day. 11/19/22(Sat)05:58:00 No.889341855

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