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Anonymous Gf wants me to be fat 89 KB JPG 01/09/23(Mon)21:11:01 No.71759993 >after years of being a khv i finally got a gf >shes awesome and we have been together for 4 years >i gained some weight about a year ago and decided to go on a diet and exercise >told her im eating healthy and starting to go to the gym >she suddenly starts baking cakes, pies and deep frying basically everything >finds different reasons for us to hang out and do stuff exactly when i want to go work out >keeps telling me to cancel my membership for no apparent reason >yesterday she made me a whopping fifteen pancakes for breakfast Im getting fatter and i dont know why shes doing this.HELP

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Anon wants to be a psychic | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG Anonymous >>15110727 (OP) Become a banker? Anonymous Anonymous Anonymous Get a job. 01/09/23(Mon)06:22:19 No.15110727 how do i summon money? 01/09/23(Mon)06:33:41 No.15110734 01/09/23 (Mon)06:35:11 No.15110735 01/09/23 (Mon)06:40:48 No.15110738 01/09/23 (Mon)06:53:57 No.15110748

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Dumbledore asked calmly | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/22/22(Thu)10:40:58 No.612915921 165 KB PNG >HARRY POTTER! >DID YOU TELL COLIN CREEVEY THAT SECTUMSEMPRA WAS A GENDER TRANSITION SPELL!? >YESTERDAY HE BLED OUT IN THE SECOND FLOOR GIRL'S BATHROOM AND BECAME A GHOST! >NOW MOANING MYRTLE IS CHASING HIM AROUND THE CASTLE CALLING HIM NEARLY HEADLESS D---! >THE MINISTRY IS SO FAR UP MY ASS THEY FOUND PETER PETTIGREW! >I hope you understand the gravity of this situation and why I am only awarding 50 points to Gryffindor. >>612916296 # >>612924709 # >>612924831 #

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[redtext] full of joyous whimsy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 195 KB JPG 2 Replies / 2 Images : Anonymous 45 KB JPG Anonymous No.71756199 Post your spirit animal. I am literally this little guy 62 KB JPG 01/09/23(Mon)12:00:46 View Thread 01/09/23 (Mon)12:01:48 No.71756204 im just silly 01/09/23 (Mon)13:32:26 No.71756956 I don't sleep at night and I might have autism

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anon explains why living in the US is so expensive | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 5ygZiyRA 1.54 MB JPG 03/03/17(Fri)08:14:50 No.115073060 How can some Americans claim they are poor? I live for 300 USD a month here in Poland and I'm fine. You f--- have welfare and foodstamps and you still claim that you struggle to live there. What's the dillio? Stop spending so much on useless s---. : Anonymous (ID: DWZNrmBW 03/03/17 (Fri)08:17:14 No.115073270 >>115073060 (OP) # A decent burger is 15 dollars. There are 3 meals in a day, that's 45 dollars a day. That's 1,350 dollars a month just in burgers, not counting any other expenses. >>115073351 # >>115073451 # >>115073545 # >>115073573 # >>115073615 # >>115073654 # >>115073771 # >>115073853 # >>115074151 # >>115074283 # >>115074428 # >>115074524 # >>115074529 # >>115074560 # >>115074795 # >>115074948 # >>115075230 # >>115076181 # >>115076497 # >>115076525 # >>115076892 # >>115077014 # >>115077069 # >>115077650 # >>115078287 # >>115078638 # >>115079723 # >>115080291 # >>115080683 # >>115083647 # >>115083705 # >>115084147 # >>115084432 # >>115084463 # >>115084928 #

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Anon goes to Reddit. | /r/Greentext

55 KB JPG >Go to Reddit. >Post something controversial on a right-leaning sub. >"OP is a troll. Nobody can be that braindead." >"STFU dumbass just look at A, B and C." >Post something controversial on a left-leaning sub. >"Tee hee f------ kill yourself you waste of oxygen." >"Go rot in a ditch where no one will ever find you. We will not miss your XYZphobic ass. I'm better. <3"

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Anon just joined college | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 281 KB PNG wire > walk away 01/09/23(Mon)19:10:06 No.71757012 > be me > walk trough university building in search of a toilet > see a telephone on the wall > dial a random 4 digit number so it connects in-house > it dials > leave the handset hanging on the I like to imagine someone picked up and I successfully epically trolled someone

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Anon buys hogwarts legacy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/08/23(Sun)22:32:48 No.623659038 WHITE POWER cn9c7jnuuvaa1 (1).jpg 84 KB JPG DE IS >one copy of Hogwarts Legacy please

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Anon believes America is brainwashed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.43 MB JPG 01/08/23(Sun)09:55:09 No.71744286 did you know americans have been so brainwashed they believe their country is great >food standards on par with china nothing is healthy >cities are sprawling shitholes that make mexico look safe >all women are gross and fat >people only value consuming product >services and education make some third world countries look good >everything f----- up by americans be r---- by companies >no good communities or families >onions fed animals >most americans live worse oft than 3rd worlders >indians and chinese live better meanwhile europeans >banned all additives and anything that is slightly unhealthy >cities are beautiful >beautiful women maybe like 1 slightly chubby girl >people value family and tradition >services amazing and god tier >eu governments run everything perfectly no companies or lobbying to f--- everyone >great communities and great families >animals are treated very well no torture >most euros are so spoiled they cry when they get 2 months vacation instead of 3 >no place is better except heaven

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Was expecting something funny about being Arab | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 581 KB PNG 07/23/21(Fri)08:04:21 No.64680734 >>64680760 # >>64680371 (OP) # >Got bullied by some arab kid >called me weak in gym class >said i could punch him in the stomach since he wouldn't feel anything >punched him >He started crying like a bitch infront of the whole class

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Anon has an idea for a movie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: QhKoL8fT Movie Idea 171 KB PNG 01/09/23(Mon)12:19:04 No.411491581 >be rich industrialist >hire hundreds of people >people are threatened >industrialist attempts to save them >puts them in a chamber with poison gas canister >gas canister is set off at a random time >inhabitants of chamber are both saved and not saved simultaneously, as long as chamber remains unopened I call it "Schrödinger's List" View Thread

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Anon Soothes His GF | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 232 KB PNG 01/19/21(Tue) 20:36:54 No.845257423 >girlfriend won't stop crying because she got an abortion >get tired of hearing her s-- >go to clinic and dig out fetus from dumpster >glue googly eyes on it >walk in with it while saying 'mom im home' >she cries even harder Jesus, nothing makes this baby killer happy

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femanon is a neet | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 372 KB JPG 01/09/23(Mon)09:37:14 No.892305292 >30 year femanon >never had sex or a boyfriend >barely go outside except when my parents force >play video games and masturbate all day

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Greentext Stories - Anon has a gf | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Anonymous Gf wants me to be fat 89 KB JPG 01/09/23(Mon)21:11:01 No.71759993 >after years of being a khv i finally got a gf >shes awesome and we have been together for 4 years >i gained some weight about a year ago and decided to go on a diet and exercise >told her im eating healthy and starting to go to the gym >she suddenly starts baking cakes, pies and deep frying basically everything >finds different reasons for us to hang out and do stuff exactly when i want to go work out >keeps telling me to cancel my membership for no apparent reason >yesterday she made me a whopping fifteen pancakes for breakfast Im getting fatter and i dont know why shes doing this.HELP

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