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: Anonymous Reasom 02/27/23(Mon)03:07:07 No.72376883 >pizza arrives >take a bite >be me >used to weigh 300 pounds >decided to get my life together and lose weight >worked hard and lost 100 pounds last year >feelsgoodman.jpg 380 KB PNG >decide to celebrate by treating myself to a pizza >order a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese >can't wait to dig in >it tastes like cardboard with ketchup and cheese on top >realize I haven't eaten junk food in so long that my taste buds have changed >can't even enjoy my celebratory pizza >mfw have to celebrate with some celery sticks and a glass of water

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File size: 440 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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pol refuses the 100MhZ pill | /r/Greentext

/pol/417710624/ /pol/417710624 Anonymous dIMHDCoi 7 minutes ago 2 REPLIES Anonymous 4gYJYIKB 3 minutes ago Google M C: radio frequency side effects what are radio frequency side effects >>417710624 (OP) It effect ability to REDEEEEEEEEEMMMM! 417710624 417710995 ●●●

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Anon is a simp | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous DONE 78 KB JPG 05/11/21(Tue)16:38:33 No.63628255 >tip $1,200 to female streamer >she simply says "thx for the tip" then goes back to playing the game

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Anon feel about this one slimes? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous À 34 KB JPG 03/28/21(Sun)21:07:25 No.62950365 >hire a h----- >tell her I'm a virgin >not actually a virgin, have had plenty of sex >but when she thinks it's my first time, she's very gentle and sensual, and I get to act nervous and submissive, which really turns me on >when I act all amazed when I touch boobs "for the first time", it actually feels more special to me >I love how caring she is and how she takes the lead if she thinks she's deflowering me >when I finish, she cuddles with me and calls me a good boy I've done this with about 20 different hookers now and I can't stop.

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Anon wants to do Uber Eats | /r/Greentext

Anonymous HAHAHA I'VE HAD ENOUGH! 02/26/23(Sun)18:28:50 No.72374689 14C955AE-6287-41EE-B1A7-CD4657743A30.jpg 575 KB JPG >wanna do uber eats >too shy to take a picture of my face Well, f---. Normgrels gatekeeping financial freedom once again.

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Anon doesn't understand mailboxes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 644 KB JPG 04/19/22(Tue)00:14:47 No.876550 >go to work >come home >mailbox is magically full of letters from "real people" no way anyone actually believes this st

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Take the femboy pill, anon. It's your best hope. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/14/21(Tue)13:04:33 No.65378421 27 KB JPG >be me(5¹7) >met up with friends two days ago >one of them is a 5'1 girl, very petite >noticed she was wearing heels, 4-5 inches give or take >she gets up from her seat and we are almost eye-to eye, maybe she is slightly taller >goes in for a hug >had to slightly tiptoe to hug her >completely distraught for the rest of the evening >measure myself when I get home >barely 5'5.5 Imagine getting heightmogged by a girl who weighs like 115 lbs.

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Anon leaked the next spiderman movie plot | /r/Greentext

20211119_060819.jpg 186 KB JPG *peter parker enters j.jonah jameson office* >i got the spiderman pictures mr jameson *jonah throw the divorce papers away and quickly grab the pics from peter hand* >ahhh yes peter these are the pictures.. i was waiting for, look at his huge c---, god i bet when he masturbate he need both hands to grab it, yeees *peter takes the pictures from jonah hand* >not so fast mr jameson, this is naked spiderman, i want triple the money this time >and you shall get it peter, now GIVE THEM BACK!! *peter hand them back* >leave peter, and close the door.. *5 minutes later* *spiderman watching jonah masturbating from the window, jonah doesn't realise* >oh gosh spidey why don't you just start an onlyfans, i hate you so much ahhhhh *spiderman break the window and barge into the office with a HUGE boner* >why start an onlyfans when i only need one guy? and that's you silly *jonah stand up* >shall we begin spidey? *hardcore gay sex on the desk* >ahh yes spiderman kill my ass like that thug killed your uncle *spiderman shed a single tear, but continued f------ for 30 minutes* >that was amazing spidey >you were also amazing jonah, but can you do something for me? >anything spidey... >i want to you publish... *spiderman whisper it into jonah ear* >no problem *the next day people get the newspaper* the main headline: spiderman is amazing at sex, and he have a HUGE c--- FIN

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Sneed ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ | /r/Greentext

index.jpg, 35KiB, 680x382 /pol/ Anonymous ID: 6dPwADeY Sun 16 Oct 2022 06:13:28 No.400067551 Replies: 5 IT STARTS WITH One sneed To feed and seed It doesn't even matter how hard you seethe Keep that in mind, I designed this post to explain in due time ALL I KNOW Sneed is a valuable thing Watch it feed by as the pendulum swings Watch it seed down to the end of the day The clock chucks life away IT'S SO UNREAL You didn't sneed out below Watch the time go right out the seedow Tryin' to feed on, they didn't even know I wasted it all just to SUCK AND F--- View I kept everything inside And even though I tried, it all fell apart What it meant to me will formerly be a memory Of a time when SEETHED SO HARD

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I posted this on 4Chan, thought y'all might like this as well. | /r/Greentext

6:06 boards.4channel.org ԵԱՀ UND D File: 20230129_140351.jpg (3.27 MB, 4000x3000) AUTOMATIC F MULERTS 4G 40% 02/25/23(Sat)14:12:52 No.57291713 + 77 M1 Garand and 1911 Copypasta Anonymous Be me Own an M1 Garand in 30-06 and a 1911 in the lord's caliber 45ACP as General George S Patton intended At home watching *M*A*S*H* Three hoodlums break into my house "What the mule fritters", as I do my best Col Sherman T Potter impression while getting my trusty M1 and load a nearby EnBlock clip and narrowly miss giving myself M1 thumb under duress Hit the first man with a 4 round blast of handloaded 165gr soft point rounds His chest cavity is eviscerated like the troops in the first boat on D-Day Move my sights to the second man Blast off 4 more rounds and PING! out of ammo Completely missed due to not having NODs Charge forward towards him and impale him with the 16in bayonet on my M1 Goes through him and into the third man hiding behind him Pull out my 1911 and double tap both men with 230gr FMJ while saying "They All Fall To Hardball!" Just as Douglas MacArthur intended.

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ANON IS DESPERATE | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb Sauce NAO Mfw+mfw+i+tell+the+girl+im+in+lo (...).gif, 2MiB, 390x285 /b/ Anonymous Sun 25 Sep 2016 23:00:15 No.705427838 View Report >Be Me >30 y/o Virgin NEET >Live in my Aunts Basement (Parents kicked me out) >Whatever.jpg >My Aunt gets me a job at her Salon >Nothing big, just sweeping and mopping, easy s---. >I use the money for vidya and tendies. >I see lots of women I want to f--- at the salon. >404 people skills not found. I start to collect hair from some of the attractive ones after I sweep. >Get enough to make a hair doll. >Over time it gets pretty big. I start to talk to it, decide its my new G/F. >Call her Hairly Quinn. >Decide to lose my V card. >Stick fleshlight in Harly. F--- her 4 to 5 times a day. >Feelsgoodman.png >Come home after work. Aunt is sitting with my parents in the living room, Hairly is the table. >They decide I need "special help" and hire some f-- to follow me around and make sure I don't hurt someone. >My parents and aunt ignore me now, she just leaves food on the counter. >MFW I think I should be a hero and kill myself.

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anons dad does a bit of trolling | /r/Greentext

File: d.jpg (100 KB, 1024x768) DIACH 647 that will Bryt do? Aryt 110/118 Anonymous 02/25/23(Sat)16:26:27 No.72361273 [Reply]► >>72361296 >>72361474 >>72361583 >be me 15 years ago >spent hours upon hours trying to catch a shiny Pokemon >finally see the sparkles and start freaking out >get ready to throw a Pokeball at it >accidentally drop my Nintendo DS on the ground >screen goes black >heart sinks as I realize what just happened >dad walks in and asks why I look like I just lost my best friend >tell him what happened >he laughs and says "Well, I guess you could say that shiny Pokemon just...slipped through your fingers." >want to punch him, but can't even muster the energy >rest of the day is spent in a state of depression and self-loathing >curse the day I ever decided to try to catch a shiny Pokemon □ Anonymous 02/25/23(Sat)16:29:36 No.72361296 ► >>72361273 (OP) you're dad is actually pretty funny, thanks for sharing.

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The right answer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 85 KB JPG looking making $7/hr and still go out and get laid every weekend or easily get a date with no issues. 02/13/23 (Mon)17:01:22 No.72214934 >I'm part of the rapidly increasing population of men that are not hot enough or charismatic enough to get casual sex, but also too broke to get a girlfriend that "lowers" her physical standards >It baffles me how 20-30 years ago our fathers could be completely average >The only competition they had were other dudes in the bar who approached a girl, or maybe guys her friends set her up with. >Nowadays she can swipe right on only the hottest 6'2 dudes on dating apps or any athlete in her dms >I'm genuinely curious what this will lead to in 10-15 years with all these single guys : Anonymous 570 KB PNG 02/13/23 (Mon)17:19:52 No.72215116 >>72214934 (OP) # >something something TOPPED

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Greentext Stories - Anon loses weight. | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous Reasom 02/27/23(Mon)03:07:07 No.72376883 >pizza arrives >take a bite >be me >used to weigh 300 pounds >decided to get my life together and lose weight >worked hard and lost 100 pounds last year >feelsgoodman.jpg 380 KB PNG >decide to celebrate by treating myself to a pizza >order a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese >can't wait to dig in >it tastes like cardboard with ketchup and cheese on top >realize I haven't eaten junk food in so long that my taste buds have changed >can't even enjoy my celebratory pizza >mfw have to celebrate with some celery sticks and a glass of water

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Uploaded Feb 26, 2023 at 04:24PM EST

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