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11/08/21(Mon)01:16:58 No.866297310 So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behavior. For example, if you eat it is likely that you will swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, the matrix would have to shut down. : Anonymous 41 KB JPG So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that becuase that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise).

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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anon wonders if it's too much to ask | /r/Greentext

File: despair.png (204 KB, 428x399) is it too much to ask Anonymous 04/14/23(Fri)03:08:30 No.897566614 ► >>897566867 >>897566944 >is it really too much to ask for a loving girlfriend >is it really too much to ask for a girl who will support me, as will i, her >is it really too much to ask for a girl who will listen to me and my problems >is it really too much to ask for a girl who genuinely cares >is it really too much to ask for a girl who is loyal >is it really too much to ask for a girl who loves me for who i am and i dont have to put a fake persona on with, someone i can truly be real with >> Anonymous 04/14/23(Fri)03:16:01 No.897566867 ► >>897566614 (OP) What do you bring to the table? Anonymous 04/14/23(Fri)03:18:19 No.897566944 ► >>897566614 (OP) yea dude. it's too much to ask when you're a f------ sperg loser. Instead of begging for women to love you how about you become something worth loving.

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anon tries to make a friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/15/23(Sat)01:03:41 No.72953338 9438985.png 15 KB PNG >took my cellphone number >changed the last number (like 7 to 6 or 8) >sent a text >"hello number neighbor!" >no reply At least I tried to make frens, what's your excuse?

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anon wants the truth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Na >pour hot water >close the lid >wait 5 minutes >the noodles are ready to eat Do you really believe this s---? SP 741 04/14/23(Fri)23:57:10 No.72952706 00:21 Do you really believe this s---? >>72953040 # doureallybelieve.jpg 160 KB JPG : Anonymous >>72952706 (OP) # >Do you really believe this s---? I don't habeeb it 04/15/23(Sat)00:00:16 No.72952729 : Anonymous >>72952706 (OP) # I don't know only incels buy cup noodles incel 04/15/23(Sat)00:30:36 No.72953027 04/15/23(Sat)00:31:47 No.72953040 04/15/23(Sat)00:32:37 No.72953049 : Anonymous : Anonymous >>72952706 (OP) # What happens to the girl inside when I finish it?

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anon has nothing to look forward to anymore | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 238 KB JPG >got a gf >got sex 04/14/23(Fri)22:59:25 No.72952161 : Anonymous What now? What is there in life to look forward to? : Anonymous >>72952161 (OP) # Nothing, you now realize that it was the longing for something that made it special, once you have it it loses its spark, it just becomes stale and you need to find something new to want 04/14/23(Fri)23:12:32 No.72952268 04/14/23(Fri)23:02:43 No.72952180 : Anonymous >>72952161 (OP) # I don't know. I was pretty content when I had a gf and got sex. Didn't want anything else. 04/14/23(Fri)23:30:38 No.72952444 McDonald's McCrucifixion.jpg 90 KB JPG > What now? What is there in life to look forward to? Bills. Q

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Anon describes the life of a wagie | /r/Greentext

File: reallife.jpg (25 KB, 450x512) wagie stories thread Anonymous 04/14/23(Fri)13:40:25 No.72952244 [Reply] post your wagie greentexts >be me 1 year ago >be security guard >crackheads always shoplifting >manager notices i am not doing my job >start doing my job >crackheads wait outside for me after work >stabbed to death shelf stacker job interview on monday i hope i get it bros

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Anon tries to meet a woman | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/14/23(Fri)16:22:01 No.897594888 >be on my city's subreddit >start bantering with a las in comments >get in DMs and ask to meetup and explore the city together >it's a date >5 minutes later >"never mind a------ bigot get a life" >aw s---! remember that I was recently deep in trains rabbithole, saying things like "men should not be allowed to punch women in wrestling sports", "d--- and balls means it is a male", "men in lingerie should not touch kids" 20 KB JPG >mfw I'm a trains-phobe >mfw I forgot to use my alt account to talk to women anyone else have multiple personalities on the internet with one based on what women and hollywood like?

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Anon spends his hard earned crypto | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: zWs2C0mw) 04/14/23(Fri)15:51:16 No.54595005 >be me >general manager of a $10 million a year Publix location >sitting at my desk >"MANAGER TO THE REGISTERS PLEASE" >walk downstairs to the register 8 >20 year old hot cashier looks uncomfortable >customer on the other side is waiting too >he's about 335 ponds >my little pony shirt with holes in it >goodwill secondhand jeans also dirty >guy smells like moldy Muenster cheese >cashier says "hey Jeff his debit card is not working and says it should” >look in the bags >chips, cheap beer, takis, world of Warcraft subscription card >no soap, no deordorant, no tshirt of local beach nearby >what's going on with your card, sir? >WHY ARENT YOU ACCEPTING THIS CARD! WHY WONT YOU TAKE MY MONEY! >is it a visa, Mastercard or American Express? >NO ITS A CRYPTO DEBIT CARD I HAVE .0178 BTC ON IT MORE THAN ENOUGH TO BUY THIS STUFF! >sir we only take real money here >THIS IS REAL MONEY! I AM GOING TO CALL CORPORATE >other customers look uncomfortable >sir you have 5 minutes to leave or I'm calling the police >THIS IS RACISM WHY ARENT YOU TAKING MY MONEY! ITS REAL MONEY! >again Sir, 5 minutes or I am calling the police >starts crying and waddles out of the store >>54595035 #

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Anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous * 290 KB PNG 08/16/22(Tue)19:10:32 No.67991793 >be me >somewhat shy >walking to the squat rack >from the corner of my eye, see the most beautiful man I've ever seen walking in the same direction >can literally see his 10-pack through his shirt >actcool.gif >keep on walking >so does he >reach squat rack >he's looking right at me >somehow, my shyness just disappears and some primal instinct kicks in, so I make eye contact and keep looking into the darkest, soul-melting eyes I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on >adrenaline kicks in, and without thinking, I move closer to him >he moves closer as well >in the heat of the moment, without even saying anything, I slowly go in for a kiss >my heart skips as many beats as humanly possible as I realise he does the same >suddenly, *bump* >mfw my head almost shattered the mirror trying to kiss my reflection Appreciate yourself anons. You're already beautiful exactly the way you are.

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Anon suffers from his existence | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/19/23(Sun)16:59:44 No.72628767 1.01 MB WEBM >normalfag >exists >gets rewarded >me >exists >gets punished i will get my compensation after i die, r- right? all these years of suffering weren't completely pointless, right?

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Anon is a cool guy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous muslim coworker thinks I'm coo(...) 209 KB PNG 04/14/23(Fri)21:39:18 No.72953395 >be right winger >don't really like muslims but of course I act civil and don't say that irl >aware of a lot of aspects of arab/muslim culture because I've hung out in online nationalist circles that would ironically be pretty diverse >get a new coworker who is pakistani >quiet and keeps to himself >say salam alaykum to him >"dude you know that? no way" >"yeah bro of course I'm interested in other cultures" >opens up a lot to me, I say other arabic phrases to him, tell him I know it's ramadan so if he ever needs help I got his back >told me today that I'm the coolest guy he's ever met you know, maybe they're alright....

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Joey........ | /r/Greentext

File: Mamon.png (1.4 MB, 1220x1150) Could this ship work? Anonymous 04/09/23(Sun)20:46:10 No.136543799>>136544311 >>136545175 >>136548650 >>136548741 >>136549907 >>136549982 >>136550980 >>136551028 >>136551095 >>136551371 >>136554092 >>136558083 >> Anonymous 04/09/23(Sun)22:10:09 No.136545175 >>136545279 >>136545322 >>136545402 >>136546086 >>136548989>>136551331 >>136552016 >>136557135 >>136559043 File: 1673445978880834.jpg (81 KB, 923x1098) Bang □ >> Anonymous 04/09/23(Sun)22:17:06 No.136545279 File: 1666459306722432.jpg (217 KB, 442x693) >>136543799 (OP) OMG this picture is haunting. It reminds of an incident in 11th grade involving a special ed kid and one of the cheerleaders. His name was Joey. Husky and had a prominent brow ridge. One day he decided one of the cheerleaders named Darcel was his girlfriend. Gorgeous tan girl with nice t------, curly hair, with cute hips. He straight up approached her in class (the tards were meshed into normal classes) and told her she was now his girlfriend. Then he announced it to the whole class. She thought it was funny. We didn't take it seriously. A few days go by, and he starts getting hostile to any guy talking to her. The jocks don't take that s--- at all, especially when he tries to give them this neanderthal glare. But they don't beat his ass because special ed. They tell him to just f--- off. Darcel started to get scared. He keeps getting close to her like in OP's image often. One day Joey finally spergs out completely and quotes the Doemon love speech from G-Gundam, replacing Rei's name with Darcel's. "I love you! I WANT TO BE WITH YOU! DARCEEEEEEEEELLLL!" Darcel ran out of class and had to be consoled by her friends. The teachers try to explain to Joey why he can't continue with his obsession, but he's on this true love trip. So they pull him from the regular classes and keep him in the portables outside the main campus. Things seem to calm down. About a month later, I see security running all over campus, then see them escorting Joey to the admin office, followed by police, and then his parents arriving later. Never saw him again. >>136545336 >>136545402 >>136546086 >>136551331 >>136552016 >>136559043 >>136545175 The story I got second hand was that he somehow got out of sight of his wrangler and hid in the girls changing room. The rooms had showers with dividers, but were never used. He waited for Darcel to be in her panties then came into the main area with an erect d--- and tried to play out some kind of "oops am I in the wrong room" act. The resulting screams scared him out, leading to the security being called and looking for him(hence why I saw them running around the campus.) They found Joey hiding in some bushes that lined the building. They brought his clothes to him then took him to the office. I think Darcel's family raised hell on the school. She never came back either. I hope things turned out well for her.

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Smooth moves | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Such a waste of a twink 42 KB JPG >not gay >not trans 04/13/23(Thu)11:28:04 No.30512529 My friend: >18 years old >male >narrow shoulders >perfect pink butthole >smooth fair skin >beautiful legs >5'1 >slim and petite >angelic voice >feminine face >long lashes >>30512635 # Honestly I want to do things to him that I would (not) regret. : Anonymous >>30512529 (OP) # How do you know what his anus looks like? 04/13/23(Thu)11:31:14 No.30512565 04/13/23(Thu)11:37:39 No.30512635 : Anonymous >>30512565 # You know, checking it

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Greentext Stories - Anon breaks the matrix | /r/Greentext

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11/08/21(Mon)01:16:58 No.866297310 So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behavior. For example, if you eat it is likely that you will swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, the matrix would have to shut down. : Anonymous 41 KB JPG So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that becuase that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise).

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