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: Anonymous >be japanese in 2023 >want to order ramen online 06/25/23(Sun)19:46:22 No.94281786 >get out my fujitsu pentium 3 laptop >boot up windows xp >open IE5 and go to yahoo.jp to find a local delivery service >print out their business card >write down my order on a sheet of paper and sign it with my hanko seal >go down to the local convenience store and fax it >play some Metal Slug in the store's arcade machine while I wait >delivery man comes and hands me a floppy in exchange for cash >insert floppy into nearby vending machine to get my ramen >guy put the wrong code on the floppy and the machine throws out a used pair of panties instead >>94282125 # >>94282194 # >>94283038 # >>94283755 # >>94283954 # >>94285772 # >>94287542 # >>94288863 # >>94289033 # >>94289722 # >>94291212 # >>94293196 #

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

>she stops me, wants to roleplay >blindfolds me, we're playing doctor >kinky but okay >feel pressure around my ass >pull off blindfold 00 Anonymous (ID: zuq0 ITT: Weird sex experiences >be 22 >start dating blonde. 7/10 >shes quirky but fun > dat ass >second date >go to her place >shewantstheD.jpeg >go down on her >things are going well >crazy bitch is shoving 3-4 plastic horses into my a------ >she says my condition is "stable"

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Anon does war crimes | /r/Greentext

>Iraq... >Driving through some broke ass sand village. >Kids playing in the road. >Lead truck, I tell the VC >he tells me to keep driving Historically when kids stop convoys, there's always an ambush in play. They use the kids to stop the lead vehicle then the adults open up with everything they have. Kill everyone. >I shut my eyes, the road is straight. >bump... >bump bump.. >bump bump bumpy bump... >distant screaming. >bump >I've never been the same since. 14 KB JPG

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Anon is crazy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: N3sLS66a Why is this so funny? 55 09/08/23(Fri)18:02:05 No.440633655 ! French Revolution.jpg 47 KB JPG >"Men are inhenrently good." >"Liberty, Equality, Fraternity." >PROCEEDS TO BUTCHER CHILDREN AND DO BATHTUB BLOOD O--- НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАН/ АНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА!!!! Why is this so funny?

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The limits of satire | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/18/23(Sat)21:17:02 No.631257348 >Game has a ridiculous cartoonishly evil parody villain >think it's funny >Read the YT comments under the soundtrack >it's different versions of "He is kinda right though!" This game proved that no matter how blatant and unsubtle your attempt at satirizing political figures, as long as your character is charismatic and speaks with convection, you will have hordes of gullible idiots who will unironically agree with everything you say, all you have to do is acknowledge basic issues such as "Society is LE BAD" and provide any ridiculous solution or no solution at all, and that's it. 222 KB JPG

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Anon is as master debater | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Philosophical 490 KB PNG genius 09/08/23(Fri)11:09:37 No.905739908 >be me >discussing politics >guy says "that's your opinion" >"That's your opinion that its only my opinion"

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Anon had a female friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Disowned thread. 1.72 MB GIF 09/08/23 (Fri) 18:41:20 No.905765805 >2014. >I was a sophomore in high-school. >I was your average HS delinquent who started s---. >Had a female friend since 3rd grade. >I don't know why she stuck with me through my delinquent phase. >Some other dude began hanging out with us and he was giving off red flags that pointed out he was a man-w----. >This dude put up a facade that he was the perfect kid and everything and it was working. >After a while it was three of us hanging out and occasionally she'd bring him over to my house. >My parents loved this dude and I was jealous as f---. >Anyway I found texts to his friends that he was trying to get to her just to try her p---- out, and use her. >This p----- me off and I beat him up. >Fractured his face and everything. >While in the court room over the ordeal I was charged with assault. >Mom and dad basically disowned me. >Female friend said she was disappointed. >Spent 2 years in a JDC and spent 2 in a prison. >While in prison I got a restraining order put on me. >Wow, what the f---, getting disowned and then a restraining order put on me by my parents. >Got out of prison and was able to get a job at Coca Cola. >In 2016 my old friend and the guy began dating. >In 2018 she put his name on her bank account. >Within weeks he emptied the account and bolted, taking hundreds of thousands she got from a trust fund. >Before anyone reacted he wiped everything of himself on social media and disappeared. Now my family is letting me know I can now come around and are begging for forgiveness because they didn't believe me. My old friend is now in a depressive-like state and personally I don't care. They've been out of my lives for so long that if one was to die I wouldn't be bothered by it. 28 Replies/13 Images View Thread

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Anon has a stronk | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/08/23(Fri)09:49:47 No.905737051 >be be >trans masc >blasting 800 mg of tren and 2000 test cypher >getting chest pain >end up in ER >doctors check male on records >start describing symptoms >doctors tell me it's anxiety, discharge me >arm goes numb, can't talk or recognize faces >rushed back to ER, given stroke test >fail 29 KB JPG >elevated troponin >doctor tells me I had a stroke >doctor asks me what drugs I take and asks if I'm blood doping >tell him I'm taking steroids for gender affirming care >tells me that's steroid abuse and it caused my stroke >tells me women's symptoms of stroke are different and if I told him I was trans I would of likely not gotten paralyzed >mfw the cishet normative patriarchy oppressed me

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Anon dosent understand Latin love for Dragon Ball Z | /r/Greentext

File: images.jpg (8 KB, 259x194) 09/15/22(Thu)20:24:03 No.170913787 » »>170913839 >>170913859 >>170913974>>170913975 >>170914120 >>170914224 >>170914623 >>170915957 >>170916170 Anonymous I was just in a McDonald's and there was a group of Mexican kids crowded around a laptop watching the Dragonball Z Cell VS Gohan fight at full volume in Spanish >> Anonymous 09/15/22(Thu)20:26:54 No.170913839 ► Anonymous 09/15/22(Thu) 20:28:14 No.170913859 ► >>170913943 >>170914602 >>170913787 (OP) # Based

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Anon takes swift action | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous An hero Please be patient I have autism 09/08/23(Fri) 18:15:35 No.905759228 220 KB PNG >Be me >at dads with step sister >she's playing with her dog >dog starts biting her >protective instincts >kick dog in the throat as hard as I can, dog slumps over,whining loudly >"WHAT THE F--- ANON HE WAS PLAYING, YOU'RE SICK, LEAVE YOU FREAK" >she starts hyperventilating and has a panic attack >they go on for months, she goes on Xanax and gets addicted, starts mixing them with alcohol >mfw I ruined my sister's life

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Anon is immune to weed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Why Can't I Get Hi bros? 38 KB JPG 09/08/23(Fri)23:24:32 I seem to be immune to weed? No.905759613 >Me >30's >never smoked weed before. >it's legal now and why the f--- not? >buy legit government store joints "Mango Haze" from 'Color Cannabis' >told cashier I never smoked before so she warned me to maybe only take a few puffs at a time and wait 5min to see if I like it. >nothing >go out and rip the rest of it >nothing >ffwd next night (present time, A.D.) >rip through one more >nothing >speed run three of them >literally nothing at all except a dry throat Am I broken? I thought I tried weed in highschool once but when nothing happened I just assumed I got ripped off and it was fake b/c noob.

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Anon‘s girlfriend won‘t stop farting | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: qcqw+HFF 167 KB JPG 07/09/20(Thu)23:57:38 No.267224774 >gf keep farting during sex >i tell her to stop >stop what >stop farting >im not farting >keep f------ her >she keeps farting : Anonymous (ID: 7/3bbaXz >>267225105 # 07/10/20(Fri)00:00:08 No.267225026 Best thread on 4chan right now

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Anon is attracted to... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/09/23(Sat)00:36:07 No.29723773 >Be me >19 year old male >Think that it's ok to be attracted to people who are 5 years younger than yourself >Beat my d--- to drawings of 14 year old characters >Realize that most people should be attracted to those who are at least 2 to 3 years younger than themselves I think I have to kill myself. What do? 25 KB JPG : Anonymous 09/09/23(Sat)00:41:26 No.29723794 OP here, I should've said "found out" instead of "realized" because I discovered the whole 2-3 years thing from the internet cuz I was getting worried about whether it was right for me to continue jerking off to 14 year old characters when I'm 19.

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He refers to women as 'females' | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/05/23(Tue)23:37:03 No.189561965 B4D8C2AC-36EC-437F-8E94-BDF2F55A9E46.jpg.png 52 KB PNG >we need to showcase that this character is an incel >say no more

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Greentext Stories - Anon is Japanese | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous >be japanese in 2023 >want to order ramen online 06/25/23(Sun)19:46:22 No.94281786 >get out my fujitsu pentium 3 laptop >boot up windows xp >open IE5 and go to yahoo.jp to find a local delivery service >print out their business card >write down my order on a sheet of paper and sign it with my hanko seal >go down to the local convenience store and fax it >play some Metal Slug in the store's arcade machine while I wait >delivery man comes and hands me a floppy in exchange for cash >insert floppy into nearby vending machine to get my ramen >guy put the wrong code on the floppy and the machine throws out a used pair of panties instead >>94282125 # >>94282194 # >>94283038 # >>94283755 # >>94283954 # >>94285772 # >>94287542 # >>94288863 # >>94289033 # >>94289722 # >>94291212 # >>94293196 #

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