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>be me bottomless pit inspector > Job is to inspect bottomless pits for safety regulations > Wake up at 6am, grab my hard hat and safety gear > Arrive at the site, greeted by fellow inspectors > Begin descent into the pit, flashlight in hand > Reach the bottom... f--- > Panic sets in as I realize the pit has an end > Report my findings to the supervisor > Get fired for failing to ensure the pit's bottomlessness > Land a new job as a Bottom Pit Inspector > During my first inspection, the pit I'm inspecting is bottomless > Get fired again. > Life is over. Jump into bottomless pit >mfw its only 2 feet deep

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon contemplates war | /r/Greentext

5h (2/10 6:20) 60901532 JPG 311KB (800 × 1030) Tom_Lea_-_2000_Yard_Stare.jpg 7 Replies >300 BC >Gets trampled and eviscerated by war elephants >100 AD >Get hacked to death by a bunch a nude Germans in the Black Forest >1000 AD >Takes boiling water to the face while climbing a castle wall >1500 AD >Drown in mud because you horse got killed and your armor is too heavy to get back up >1700 AD >Get both your legs ripped off by a cannonball >1916 AD >Die suffocating in a hole after inhaling poison gas >1945 AD >Get burned to a crisp by a flamethrower in a s----- bunker >2000 AD >Get killed by an Amazon drone while taking a s--- Anons, I'm started to think war always sucked

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Anon's being bugcel on the Valentine's day | /r/Greentext

YWNFYB Anonymous (ID: UCC7AWqR 02/14/24(Wed)2 You will never find your bug You will never sit with her on a stalk holding legs You will never copulate and make eggs together You will die a lonely insect never feeling other chitin exoskeleton

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The Machine Eats Itself | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Apps (4) > > Discord (32 bit) (6) Opera GX Internet Browser (25) Spotify (8) Task Manager 02/14/24(Wed)16:18:51 No.98991383 14 KB PNG 0% 15.0% 0% 0.1% 285.6 MB 2,439.8 MB 232.6 MB 21.4 MB 0 MB/s 0.3 MB/s 0 MB/s 0 MB/s Hi /g/ Is there any reason why Opera GX takes up over 2.5GB when Im running a youtube video? 0.1 Mbps 0.1 Mbps 0 Mbps 0 Mbps All those 25 tabs have been pinned so I can watch them later so they shouldn't be using much (if not any) ram.

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Most Honorable Admiral | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 0 Qa K/s 02/09/24(Fri) 18:00:39 No.60896298 01:05 * * *** Screenshot_20240209_102543_Firefox.jpg 137 KB JPG >Admiral Fukyu N----- was born in 1880 in a fishing village near Nagasaki. He was born into an ancient samurai clan called "Kuru Krux." >From a young age he was determined to serve in the Imperial Navy and was accepted into the naval academy, where his excellent grasp of the tea ceremony and ability to bow much lower than anybody else ensured his fast graduation. >At the age of 17 he served in the Navy during the Russo-Japanese War and distinguished himself during the Battle of Tsushima by sinking the Russian cruiser Vranya with a single torpedo that struck the vodka storage. >His career was mostly uneventful afterwards until the '20s, when he fell in with the hyper-militaristic crowd. >After coups and government restructuring, Adm. Fukyu N----- was assigned command of the 7th Fleet in the war against China. >He distinguished himself again by his numerous war crimes near Shanghai, including the infamous "Night of 1,000,000 Rapes" for which he was awarded the Order of the Heavenly Katana. >In 1940 as diplomacy with America broke down, he was called to several meetings in Tokyo to discuss the feasibility of war with America. During one of these meetings, after Adm. Yamamoto remarked that Japan had no real chance of victory, Adm. Fukyu N----- flew into a violent rage. >He dropped his trousers and began furiously masturbating while screeching the Bushido Code, which he had memorized. He then declared: "IF WE DON'T GO TO WAR WITH GAIJIN I WILL KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM AND R--- THEIR CORPSES, INCLUDING THE EMPEROR!!!" >This display of the Yamato Spirit impressed everyone deeply, and Hirohito applauded his dedication. 02/09/24(Fri) 18:01:06 No.60896300 : Anonymous >>60896298 (OP) # >After the Pearl Harbor attack, Adm. Fukyu N----- was assigned to the defense of Japan's outer posessions. Here he established his credibility by refusing to properly guard Japanese convoys, ignored air defenses, and disengaged from every battle where he had a decisive advantage. >He developed an intense rivalry with Adm. Desu Sugoi and Gen. Sashimi Sushi, repeatedly refusing to provide proper support to both. When questioned about this by his superiors, Adm. Fukyu N----- would begin screeching about "samurai honor and pride" while threatening to committ Seppuku and Sudoku. This further display of the Yamato Spirit got him assigned to increasingly important assignments. >During the naval battle at Bungo-Bungo, as his destroyers and cruisers werr being r---- by PT boats, he withdrew his battleships to save face, remarking "Ror, rmao!" >As the war turned decisively against Japan, Adm. Fukyu N----- was given command of Suicide Fleet No. 4. His task was to take his fleet into hopeless battle and get everyone killed, in the hope that this would motivate the rest of Japan. >He approved of this plan, remarking that "Those who kill theselves will cause resources and well-trained pilots to appear out of nowhere and ensure victory." >His suicide fleet was jumped by submarines and carrier planes, with every ship destroyed except for the cruiser Chokobo, which picked up the 40 survivors of the whole expedition. >As his flagship, the battleship Senpai was sinking (still being torpedoed in anvill attacks), he committed Seppuku while writing a Haiku: >My life ebbs away >Like the nakadashi flows >From a loli's cun >He is comemmorated in the Tokyo War Shrine and several nationalist groups celebrate his birthday. >>60896640 # >>60896977 # >>60896996 # >>60897140 # >60897426 # >>60897498 # >>60897744 # >>60897778 # >>60898702 # >>60899132 # >>60900639 # >>60900713 # >>60900753 # >>60900817 # >>60900909 # >>60902974 # >60904121 # >>60904187 # >>60904331 # >>60905815 # >>60905907 # >>60906270 # >>60906500 # >>60906756 # >>60907680 # >>60908654 # >>60911359 # >>60911463 # >>60914922 # >>60916000 # >>60918069 # >>60918471 # >>60920287 # >>60923978 # : Anonymous 02/09/24(Fri) 18:10:19 No.60896372 You forgot about Rear Admiral Buk Brakeru anon

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Happy valentines day anons! | /r/Greentext

SONY PSS XR OLED XR >>667096830 # SONY PODEWAR : Anonymous >>667096316 (OP) # >a80k lol poorfag : Anonymous LOOK AT WHAT MY GF GOT FOR ME FOR VALENTINES A80K 65 163.9 cm Cless/ Classe/ 1668688562554058.jpg 264 KB JPG : Anonymous >A castrated PC with a bunch of slop Headset and TV might be nice tho JEDI 02/14/24(Wed)23:56:44 No.667096551 02/14/24(Wed)23:58:42 No.667096720 02/14/24(Wed)23:59:28 No.667096816 >Wife buying vidya so you can play in a cuck shed while she busy with tyrone

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Get fucked Egypt | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 36 KB JPG guy here Who wrote this? 02/14/24(Wed)20:45:15 No.913946441 >Moses tells Pharaoh to let his people go >God decides to intervene and purposely harden Pharaoh's heart >This is an excuse so God can f--- over Egypt and kill thousands of innocent people >Pharaoh is seen as the bad

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Anon is home alone with his sister | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: VTD+OzBh) SP 02/12/24(Mon) 20:19:39 No.458416683 1668389757662968.jpg 239 KB JPG >your parents aren't home >your stepsister touches your arm >you turn to her and see this What's the right course of action here? 25 Replies / 3 Images Anonymous (ID: eQ+trarW) [+] View Thread 02/12/24(Mon)21:14:50 No.458421553 >>458416683 (OP) # She probably farted while in that position.

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Here Comes The Generic UK Weather Again | /r/Greentext

Anonymous S 91 KB PNG 02/14/24(Wed)16:47:42 No.76461775 >Be me after a long day of wage slaving at work. >Go online and see loads of happy couples on valentines day posts. >Cry into pillow for half an hour. >50% because I have to go back to work tomorrow. >50% because I will always be a khhv loser. >100% because I am doomed to live like this for the rest of my life. What is the most painless way to kill myself without a gun because of united shitdom laws? For a hint, I drive a diesel car. Is there anything I could do with that?

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To Take on The World Would be Something | /r/Greentext

Anonymous BID 02/14/24(Wed)15:40:33 No.76461213 >be me, 19y.o. college senior >live in the village of B------ Nowhere (population 400; picrel), borderline ghost-town >want to move to city (population 40,000) near college >parents and fiancee don't want me moving into that city until I find work there 30 KB JPG >look for a full-time job in that area >employers aren't willing to hire me because I live an hour drive away >put that I'm willing to relocate on my resume >employers require a bachelor's degree >can't get the bachelor's degree until I graduate >want to move in directly after I graduate >can't move in because I don't have a job in the area >even if they saw that I was graduating in a few months, they'd still take forever to look at my application because they just don't feel like it or whatever Literally what the f--- am I supposed to do, robots?

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Crying For Help | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 87 KB JPG 02/14/24(Wed)15:36:53 No.76461174 >make a post >zero replies on it >replies on everything else >make thread >0 replies >make inflammatory bait thread/post >0 replies Anonymous Well congrats you now have 1 02/14/24(Wed)15:39:13 No.76461199 02/14/24(Wed)15:39:19 No.76461202 Anonymous >>76461174 (OP) here's a reply OP. What were the other threads even about? Anonymous >>76461199 thank you, anon >>76461202 Just helpful tips on various boards with links and videos that expand on the topic, threads usually die whenever I post 02/14/24(Wed)15:43:12 No.76461237

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Anons take on school | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 92 KB PNG 11/02/2024, 10:18:54 > force kids to sleep a couple hours a night > start at 8 in the morning > work overload > end at 3 in the afternoon No.15190027 > give kids homework that cant be done in a short ammount of time > education system failing "why do they hate us?"

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Cholesterol Heart | /r/Greentext

Board /b/ - Random Anonymous 79 KB JPG >bald >poor >bad teeth >bad hygiene Settings Mobile Home 02/14/24(Wed)15:07:07 No.913939024 Valentine's day again... >be me >40 yo >alone yet again >kissless, touchless virgin, never even smelled a whiff of p---- >extremely fat >very unhealthy, feel like s--- 24/7 >micropenis >brain absolutely fried from cooming and browsing /b/ all day for decades >can barely get hard anymore, all p--- has to be extreme >unemployed, never had a job >no education, couldn't even finish HS >no friends >live with embarrassed, disappointed, elderly parents >shamefully mooch off of their meager retirement >steal their money to buy weed >stay up every night getting high and playing vidya/watching anime, just like when I was a kid >sleep until noon like a worthless p------------ >cyberstalk all my old friends from school and watch enviously as they live normal, happy lives >siblings absolutely despise me, rightfully >wish so desperately that a female would even look at me like a person, and not a freakish monster >heart hurts for intimacy and yes, sex >daydream and obsess about junior high experiences and what I could have done differently to be cool >fantasize about the girls in my eighth grade class in 1998 >imagine scenarios where they think I'm cool and we have sex >alternately imagine brutally r----- them >know in my heart that they're all ugly, old, fat moms now >live in a miasma of self hatred, loneliness, and regret >too much of a f------ coward to become an hero is there any hope for me? don't answer, I already know.

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Greentext Stories - Anon has a job | /r/Greentext

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>be me bottomless pit inspector > Job is to inspect bottomless pits for safety regulations > Wake up at 6am, grab my hard hat and safety gear > Arrive at the site, greeted by fellow inspectors > Begin descent into the pit, flashlight in hand > Reach the bottom... f--- > Panic sets in as I realize the pit has an end > Report my findings to the supervisor > Get fired for failing to ensure the pit's bottomlessness > Land a new job as a Bottom Pit Inspector > During my first inspection, the pit I'm inspecting is bottomless > Get fired again. > Life is over. Jump into bottomless pit >mfw its only 2 feet deep

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