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few days later, breaking news alert > he died of the food > be me > straight > recently got new job as chief australian overseer > I am tasked with overseeing the australians > making sure they get their feed, water, ect > also have to make sure they don't breach containment Anonymous 02/16/24(Fri)21:18:26 No.76483538 ► > only 3 have ever escaped and made it off the island, the first two died instantly when they tried western food (their feed is bland) > third was hitler mfw > one day, breach detected > no biggie, it's fairly common. usually the electric fence scares them back > electric fence is offline for maintenance > failing that, there's a minefield around it, but it doesn't detect bikes so employees can move around > it found a bike > shitshitshit > strike helicopters deployed they sucessfully hit him, his body is launched miles high upon further inspection the body turns out to be a ragdoll, he has escaped shitshitshitshit nothing more we can do waiting for the inevitable giga hitler news > s---, serious problem > before snipers can be deployed, he steals a boat and gets behind cover > scientists are studying his body > i may have destroyed the whole operation gonna lose my job

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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anonette has a free speech problem | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/24(Fri) 15:56:56 No.914030545 >be picrel >in discord server >friend owns it >friend allows us to do whatever we want, free speech >friend quits, gives server to my ex >ex goes full discord mod, removes all free speech >get banned well it was fun, link here 2e33X9v9an 13 KB JPG

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Workaround | /r/Greentext

JPG | 553.58 KB Friday 2024-02-16 23:18:57 4 minutes ago >be me >no real possibility of gf for the usual reasons >have some copes >best cope I have found is being a work husband >work husband is basically the coworker that helps a woman out at her job >covers for her sometimes, does the harder tasks, stuff like that >relationship can be really nice >have been a work husband for some qt3.14's over the years >there can be some flirting and touching >it isn't genuine, it's kind of being taken advantage of, but that is the nature of a cope Dear lord, please send me a qt3.14 with big booba who I can work husband for.

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Anon makes a Question | /r/Greentext

File: R (8).jpg (33 KB, 600x463) MUL Are human centipedes based or cringe? Anonymous (ID: HmY//pgt) 02/16/24(Fri) 15 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. □ Anonymous (ID: 80Y5OKO2) >>458794077 (OP) YUMMY 02/16/24(Fri)01:49:50 No.458794599 Anonymous (ID: e24uN210) 02/16/24(Fri)01:50:00 No.458794612 ▶ >>458794077 (OP) Unironically best thread on /pol/

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Funny how he's referred to as "blondy" a couple of times but nobody ever acknowledges his whiskers. One would think that in a universe where people can have pink and blue hair, having whiskers would be a more defining characteristic. | /r/Greentext

File: 1686936406460.jpg (28 KB, 635x483) S ☐ Anonymous 02/16/24(Fri)21:17:39 No.196330188 ► >>196330210 >>196330240 >>196330351 >>196330364 >>196330368 >>196330784 >>196330964 >>196331086 >The only blond haired blue eyed boy in the village. >None of the girls except for Hinata feel an inkling of attraction towards him until much later in the series. Are whiskers really that big of a dealbreaker?

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I have nothing to show, but the show must go on. | /r/Greentext

JPG | 118.11 KB Friday 2024-02-16 19:20:02 2 hours ago I think I'm starting to miss my doomer lifestyle >tfw i get a gf >but now i miss being alone on friday and saturday nights >where i can listen to whatever music i want, watch whatever videos on youtube i want, play whatever vidya i want >i can't just relax and do whatever i want, i have to do things she enjoys too >i am no longer i solely indivualistic person, now i hjave to always think about her and what she wants >i can't live in a doomer commieblock or live in cold weather because she hates that f---, only six months ago i would have traded all of it in for a gf, but now that i got a gf i miss my depressed lonely doomer lifestyle......

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>he fell for the 'stay friends' trap | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 56 KB JPG 02/17/24(Sat)00:17:59 No.76481355 >Be me >Started college in the fall >Quickly became friends with a girl >We shared lots of interests and talked all the time >We went to sports games together >She took me downtown to eat >She was the only person I really hung out with >Have been friends for like 6 months now >I asked her out and she said no >It felt like she genuinely liked me and I felt heartbroken >Decided to stay "friends" anyways >Now she doesn't talk to me as much >She never wants to hang out anymore >When we do she barely talks to me and keeps her distance How did I f--- this up???? Did I wait too long? Did she get bored of me? I'm distraught

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not ur typical ">be me >straight" | /r/Greentext

: bg,f8f8f8-flat, 750x,075,f(...).jpg (56 KB, 750x1000) 7 Anonymous 02/16/24(Fri)11:16:08 No.914020862 >be me >stra- >no im not im a bisexual femboy this is a 4chan post retard >try dating on tinder >(oh yeah im white, brown hair brown eyes, 5'10) >all of the girls either dont match back or are ugly >get a few matches, most of them dont really like me that much, probably assuming id cheat on them for a guy. >finally get a match >completely fumble it, she blocks me when i tell her about being a bottom and wanting to get pegged, called a good boy, etc. >fuckthisshit.jpg >switch to men >instantly like 20 matches >guys showering me with praise, tall guys, buff guys, chubby guys, etc >most are nerds like me and enjoy my interests too. >finally find this 6'1 chubby guy who likes femboys >we match and we talk for a bit >he brings me to a resturant, i dress in femboyish clothes (pink hoodie, tight pants) >get topped later that evening by his 7 inch d--- i love my new bf. we moved in together and we play warhammer darktide together and cuddle and watch tv and i make him food.

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Anon envisions the future of AI | /r/Greentext

File: 1708046078703829.webm (2.95 MB, 1280x688) Anonymous (ID: fbujf/x+ 102/15/24(Thu)20:58:38 No.458795185 >>458795345 >>458795355 >>458795398 >>458795590 >>458795806 >>458796202 >>458796562 >>458796657 >>458796736 >>458797350 >>458797555 >>458797722 >>458797991 >>458798056 >>458798241 >>458800900 >>458801975 >hehe look at his ai-made abomination >hehe look at this funny ai-made picture >pffft okay it looks passable but the hands are f----- >okay the hands look good but it always uses the same artstyle >okay it can almost perfectly copy different artstyles but it will never do video >okay it can do video but it isn't perfect YOU ARE NOW HERE >okay it perfected video but it can't innovate >sure, it can innovate but it will never be able to make videogames from scratch >I admit it, it can make videogames from scratch but it will never be able to think >okay it can create media but it can't make humans obsolete in other fields >okay it can speed up some jobs using Al tools >sure, some jobs are now obsolete and millions are unemployed but physical jobs will be fine >I admit it, we need UBI as literally everything we do is less efficient than Al >fine, it can think but it will never be used for nefarious ends >I pity the dead who will never have to endure this hell

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Most high functioning 4chan user | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 75 KB JPG 04/30/15(Thu)12:10:39 No.613049372 >middle school >school has walled off area to separate tards from the rest >get bright idea to hop wall >act retarded to blend in, dont want to be noticed and get in trouble >mfw tards had substitute >got stuck in tard class the rest of the day because sub didn't believe I wasnt a tard >>613049486 # >>613050454 # >>613051130 # >>613051245 #

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Naked seduction | /r/Greentext

JPG | 287 16 Kb Friday 2024-02-16 14:46:46 2 hours ago >Chinese couple who owns my apartment block goes on holidays >wife gets back first, makes some small talk with me which she never does >go out for smoke an hour later >shes walking naked around the apartment directly across with the blinds opened what the f---. I've been here 4 years and its never happened before. pic related

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Anon gives other Anon some friendly and constructive criticism after he makes a bad post. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Mortimer Mouse MORTIMER MOUSE 13 174 KB PNG 02/15/24(Thu)16:18:40 No.142254289 >Once every few years, randomly appear in a Disney cartoon. >"Ha Cha Cha!" >Mog the s--- out of Mickey Mouse. >Refuses to elaborate. >Vanishes out of Disney Canon again for a few more years. The Mortimer Mouse grindset is real. 02/15/24(Thu)16:19:33 No.14225430C Anonymous >>142254289 (OP) # Twitter Zoomer meme. Kill yourself.

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Anon's dad tries to apologize | /r/Greentext

Can their relationship be salvaged before he dies? Can their relationship be salv(...) 2 689 KB GIF 02/16/24(Fri)13:06:52 No.914006385 >Dad is on his death bed. >Cancer. >Everyone in the immediate family has been at the hospital nearly 24/7 except our youngest sibling. >Bit of a story but 6 years ago our little brother beat his first girlfriend because she threw a fit over a Valentines present he couldn't afford and targeted our brothers most prized possession. >She grabbed the family history book my brother has and began ripping pages out of it in front of him. >It's all my brother has of Mom's side and he saw red over it. >He beat her across his apartment over it and kicked her out. >She went to our dad and he drove over to my brother's apartment and beat his ass. >Then drug him to the police station making him turn himself in. >Spent a nearly 2 years in prison due to the extent of the assault. >He got out and we found out he was now missing his right eye. >Some prisoners found out what he did and beat the s--- out of him. >After he left prison, my sister picked him up and took him to Dad's so he could salvage some of his stuff and get back on his feet. >While he was in Dad's getting his stuff, dad was trying to strike up conversation and apologize for forcing him to turn himself in. >He got no reply and our brother walked out. >He disappeared and basically never comes around. >Our oldest brother was able to get into contact with him recently and told him Dad's in the process of dying from Cancer. >He replied back on the line. >"Yeah, that's what happens when people get Cancer. They f------ die. He deserves it too." >Then got hung up on. Can we even salvage this?

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Greentext Stories - Australia overseer | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

few days later, breaking news alert > he died of the food > be me > straight > recently got new job as chief australian overseer > I am tasked with overseeing the australians > making sure they get their feed, water, ect > also have to make sure they don't breach containment Anonymous 02/16/24(Fri)21:18:26 No.76483538 ► > only 3 have ever escaped and made it off the island, the first two died instantly when they tried western food (their feed is bland) > third was hitler mfw > one day, breach detected > no biggie, it's fairly common. usually the electric fence scares them back > electric fence is offline for maintenance > failing that, there's a minefield around it, but it doesn't detect bikes so employees can move around > it found a bike > shitshitshit > strike helicopters deployed they sucessfully hit him, his body is launched miles high upon further inspection the body turns out to be a ragdoll, he has escaped shitshitshitshit nothing more we can do waiting for the inevitable giga hitler news > s---, serious problem > before snipers can be deployed, he steals a boat and gets behind cover > scientists are studying his body > i may have destroyed the whole operation gonna lose my job

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