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Board /b/ - Random Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 04/01/24(Mon)12:31:54 No.916233450 379 KB PNG >Be me, a cow in the heart of Texas >Eating my grass >Jewish guy approaches me >He tells me that I am the most perfect cow in the world >Tells me that I am special >Surprisingly he doesn't eat my s--- like other cow worshippers do >He takes me on a trip to Israel instead of being turned into a burger >Treats me like a god for the whole journey >Then he f------ burns me alive

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

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File: chainsaw man.jpg (100 KB, 1627x915) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:55:42 No.252911844 ►>>252911908 >>252914188 >>252914377 >>252916077 >>252919346 >>252919475 >>252920429 >>252921191 W--? >> Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)07:58:52 No.252911908 ►>>252913869 >>252913951 >>252914028 File: 06467EB6-9CF5-49FC-84A4-5(...).jpg (599 KB, 2730x4096) >>252911844 (OP) Denji could've got laid. He f----- up bad.. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)08:21:47 No.252912389 ► ok groomer Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:44:20 No.252913869 ▶>>252914047 >>252914093 >>252914100 >>252914125 >>252914134 >>252914294 >>252914315 >>252914527 >>252914536 >>252914582 >>252914605 >>252914643 >>252914670 >>252914680 >>252914780 >>252914811 >>252915009 >>252915019 >>252915216 >>252915260 >>252915280 >>252915315 >>252916087 >>252916275 >>252916436 >>252916516 >>252916539 >>252916565 >>252916569 >>252916574 >>252916659 >>252916737 >>252916787 >>252916802 >>252916842 >>252916974 >>252917020 >>252917066 >>252917095 >>252917156 >>252917166 >>252917201 >>252917265 >>252917325 >>252917490 >>252917497 >>252917507 >>252918071 >>252918109 >>252918460 >>252918543 >>252918601 >>252918806 >>252919082 >>252919137 >>252919328 >>252919382 >>252919432 >>>252919448 >>>252919457 >>252919510 >>252919544 >>252919551 >>252919576 >>252919615 >>252919616 >>252919650 >>252919702 >>252919759 >>252919779 >>252919804 >>252919882 >>252919944 >>252919980 >>252920003 >>252920030 >>252920106 >>252920276 >>252920335 >>252920347 >>252920412 >>252920415 >>252920494 >>252920535 >>252920577 >>252920610 >>252920647 >>252920712 >>252921030 >>252921081 >>252921110 >>252921138 >>252921146 >>252921257 >>252921392 >>252921415 >>252922113 >>252922329 >>252922635 >>252922833 >>252923296 >>252923418 >>252923492 >>252923792 >>252924120 >>252924150 >>252925598 >>252925778 >>252925795 >>252925980 >>252926106 >>252926146 >>252926234 >>252926278 >>252926350 >>252926563 >>252926620 >>252926624 >>252926689 >>252926756 >>252926764 >>252926876 >>252926911 >>252926918 >>252926925 >>252927034 >>252927073 >>252927110 >>252927127 >>252927301 >>252927310 >>252927461 >>252927677 >>252928003 >>252928114 >>252928431 >>252928442 >>252928498 >>252928709 >>252928848 >>252928958 >>252929393 >>252929964 >>252930095 >>252930514 >>252930728 >>252930740 >>252930886 >>252930911 >>252931013 >>252931111 >>252931128 >>252931382 >>252931493 >>252911908 losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one Donaustk € 12, kwĐH T• MAZD ALİH PF 12. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:58:27 No.252914093 ► >>252913869 brother what Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:20:41 No.252915260▸ File: doomer Zoomer.png (802 KB, 720x720) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)09:55:23 No.252914047 ► e: 1266667790002282.jpg (134 KB, 1234x521) >>252913869 >losing your virginity to the office slut is like eating the last balloon at a wedding as in, only have you in if only one >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:59:10 No.252920412 ► >>252913869 This is a certified 4chan moment Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:15:48 No.252919432 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:57:35 No.252916842 ► e: b81.png (264 KB, 474x377) File: 1495908995260.jpg (78 KB, 1280×720) >>252913869 >>252913869 at last I truly see Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)13:25:28 No.252917325 ► File: i kneel.jpg (86 KB, 405x720) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:47:49 N File: file.png (178 KB, 404x489) my f------ sides best post all day i kneel >>252913869 >t. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:13:15 No.252927301 ► File: it's so over.png (816 KB, 1121x673) >>252913869 My sides Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:33:58 No.252914670 ► File: 1683785740614529.jpg (30 KB, 567x496) >>252913869 Damn, this post really mindbroken everyone Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)10:44:57 No.252914811 ► File: 1674008914715180.jpg (29 KB, 680x504) >>252913869 Never have I seen a sentiment conveyed through nonsense with such clarity before. A true modern poet. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:27:55 No.252919702 ► File: 1235316161e7427.png (161 KB, 774x788) Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:43:30 No.252926278 ► >>252913869 ESLkun... >>252913869 >The most sane CSM fan Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:56:05 No.252920335 ►>>252920351 File: 1681220115757034.jpg (95 KB, 1200x1200) >>252913869 Anon bravely dying of a stroke to shitpost one last time. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:30:34 No.252919759► File: 1667874544032923.png (42 KB, 289x256) >>252913869 XXXX Anonymous UCDAZZJIVYOCHT_42:16 No.2021 20224 IC: JUS_405_4.129 [12 <1, 300 Audinous 1024/2004; 004:20 > 2225 4000 desale Zaroor A 7841 IN It's because that man's arguments are so right that they leave no room for debate. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:41:19 No.252916516 ► File: 1679679759269336.jpg (9 KB, 302x225) >>252913869 >thread doesnt eat their balloons at a wedding Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:24:07 No.252923296▸ File: 1682955308164217.jpg (85 KB, 415x375) >>252913869 I HATE THIS i am extreme dissapoint *forced smile Are you allright anon? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:26:44 No.252923418 ► File: Interrogation_mark.jpg (266 KB, 659x932) >>252913869 Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)11:33:23 No.252915435 ►>>252916020 >>252916057 >>252926173 I just want to know who in the hell eats balloons Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)15:20:59 No.252919551► e: 1683274551527799.jpg (22 KB, 800x450) Neory BonCINII VA; CDT > < = >>252913869 >only have you in if only one Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:26:01 No.252921146 ► 4148bc178917d22bf0a75c7d3(...).png (2.97 MB, 2508x3541) >>252913869 This feels like an eldritch being is trying to communicate and spread its wisdom on thots. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)18:51:26 No.252926563 ► File: 1628025425644.png (86 KB, 250x250) >>252913869 Holy f--- I missed these kind of posts. Thanks anon. "cb1100 "PRETEND" ? Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)19:06:55 No.252927073 ► File: 1616620564086.png (506 KB, 709x708) He is speaking the language of gods. >>252913869 beautiful I-I DON'T KNOW! JUST... PRETEND TO BE RETARDED OR SOMETHING! Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:06:02 No.252920577 ►>>252920932 >>252913869 Confused reaction image farmpost Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)17:36:25 No.252923792 ► File: 1680879053748926.jpg (87 KB, 644x954) >>252913869 Funniest s--- ive all week Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)16:02:20 No. File: 1647832313112.png (236 KB, 405x560) >>252913869 We got it all wrong. Anonymous 05/24/23(Wed)12:55:51 No.252916802 ► File: 1676938237963971.jpg (285 KB, 1711x1108) >>252913869 put me in the screenie weenie

Inaqar 137 KB JPG land you protect 12/24/23(Sun)09:54:58 No.91319497 >skilled warriors seen as the main bulwark against dark forces >sons of powerful and intelligent beings of legend >follow the teachings of a golden, almighty Master who created the >sometimes have powers such as shooting fire, lighting, shockwaves, blasts of ice or energy >wield some of the most powerful weapons around >battle beastly green enemies, awakened soulless armies, spirits, undead, malicious versions of yourselves, daemonic forces, and the literal embodiments of evil >wear bright colors to sell plastic toys >be the Ninja from Lego Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitzu >pic unrelated

Anonymous 10/26/13(Sat) 19:06 No.215457549 File: 1382828761196.jpg-(42 KB, 480x480, 1353212900339.jpg) >My dads face when >"Well have fun" >leaves room >Playing Silent Hill 3 >at the end >dad walks in >"Hey son, what you playing?" >Heather regurgitates a fetus >the other girl picks it up and shoves in his mouth >"I WILL BIRTH THE GOD"

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Moar:

Anon really thought this was a good idea for a thread. | /r/Greentext

FREE Bitcoins R: 93 / I: 10 $ LISTEN UP FEMCEL FRENS!: I've got $25 USD in BTC bucks for any femcel who post an audio recording of her queefing the US national anthem with her p---- in it's entirety! Good luck

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Why does she look like that | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 51 KB JPG 03/30/24(Sat) 09:13:01 No.671803171 >See an ugly woman in a video game >Say I'm not gonna buy it cause it doesn't appeal to me. >Everyone gets mad at me, downvotes me, calls me an incel, tells me to touch grass Why is this? Why am I not allowed to only buy products that appeal to me?

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Anon is straight | /r/Greentext

195 KB PNG >be me, STRAIGHT elderly chinese man >10 minutes ago >go to sandwich shop >order the same thing I always do from the same guy that's always there >see someone new come out from the back room and go behind the counter >cute ass slim mexican femboy >notice he keeps eyeing me every few seconds while my sandwich is being made >make eye contact and he smiles >asks if I need anything else in the softest little voice >"I need you to do something" >pull out my service revolver >force him to beat me at MAHJONG otherwise I will banish him to the land of Yi (my term for barbarians) 7 Replies Anonymous View Thread 10/13/23(Fri)23:51:36 No.75059287 I wanna f--- the smug cat >>75059292 #

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Anon fixes his life. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Meth fixed my life, thanks met(...) 150 KB JPG 03/31/24(Sun)19:45:18 No.76972605 >Room is just me sleeping on bare mattress surrounded by moldy plates >Take meth >Clean room, bleach everything >Apply to 50 different jobs >Clean car, call in to have it serviced and get my warrant >Send long texts to entire family apologizing for being a f--- up That was a week ago, a temp agency already got back to me, they want me to start on wednesday. I love this drug

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The strategy of idgaf | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 42 KB JPG 04/01/24(Mon) 17:54:14 No.195522877 >Earth: Stop killing whales >Japan: No >Earth: It'll ruin your international reputation >Japan: No it won't. We'll just...keep doing it. Unapologetically. We literally just don't give a f---. 99% of the world don't actually care. Kinda weird how this form of diplomacy won.

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Anon is disappointed with Pewdiepie | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: Y1yMsuwG 852 KB PNG 03/31/24(Sun)04:50:44 No.463463279 >Be Pewdiepie >Be the most subscribed YouTuber >Use 4chan >Don't redpill your young fan base >Marry an Italian If I saw this f----- IRL... Anonymous (ID: j+4aYavW) Z >>463463279 (OP) # 03/31/24(Sun)04:51:39 No.463463334 Tran >>463471460 # Anonymous (ID: nlSpQaRr) >>463463279 (OP) # 03/31/24(Sun)04:52:06 No.463463357 >Don't redpill your young fan base Wrong >>463479410 # >>463499662 #

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Anon has no sense of smell | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Okay guys. Here goes. >be me age 17 10/25/16(Tue)17:24:09 No.3232916 >my brother is a Chad and frequently has friends over >I'm holed up in my room, I hate going outside of my room when there's guests over >Really need to s--- >Don't want to leave >See a towel in my room >Squat over the towel and s--- on it instead of leaving my room >Continue doing this throughout the years, 'cause I don't have to leave the comfiness of my room and the poop comes out easier that way >Have to eventually deliver poop-covered towel to my toilet which involves walking across the hallway >Sometimes I'd store many poop towels until I finally decided it was time to dispose of them >Have to make sure coast is clear before delivering towel >Mess up one day and my brother comes out >Get startled, drop towels full of poop >My brother's face scarred me forever

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Anon tries laundry | /r/Greentext

No.73694965 86 KB JPEG > Be me > never done laundry in my life. Moved directly from my parents house into a house with my girlfriend > Mom has always complained about how tough it is to do laundry while my Dad is at work > Gf complains about how much laundry she has to do with us and our two kids > Eventually divorce, and I'm living by myselfd > dreading-laundry.wav > throw clothes in the machine > come back two hours later and take them out What is their problem?

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Their PR has been so terrible lately | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.51 MB JPG group 04/01/24(Mon)05:43:03 No.195506688 >hard working >conservative >highest earning ethnic group in america >over 90% own their own homes >strong family values >contribute to society in every sector >over 80% are college educated >high iq and best test scores out of any >many american companies have indian ceos >virtually commit zero crime unlike blacks and mexicans >net contributes to the economy unlike blacks >dress clean and don't act like thugs so why exactly are Indians hate? Makes no sense

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Anon is irish | /r/Greentext

186 KB JPG >Be me >Genuinely autistic >Coworkers and I are enjoying an after work dinner >Everybody is talking about their ethnicity, one says their Norwegian, another says they're German, another French, British, Israeli >I mention that I'm Irish. Israeli guy jokes with me, Shouldn't you be ordering the potatoes?" he asks. I laugh. >I reply with "Shouldn't you be bombing hospitals?" >Entire table goes silent and I get looks. >Everybody gets mad and somebody says they're going to tell this to HR. >I might lose my f------ job What the f--- did I do wrong? How badly did I f--- up? 16 Replies 1 Image View Thread

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Anon Doesn't Understand Mad Max | /r/Greentext

File: mid mix.jpg (446 KB, 2048x1347) >>197741303 >>197741530 >>197741626 Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)04:34:23 No.197740949 >>197742087 >>197742119 >>197743310 >>197743331 >>197743687 >>197744146 >>197744811 >>197744841 >>197745454 >>197749275 >>197749706 >>197750910 >>197752118 >>197752421 >>197752545 >>197754063 >> >first film >society seems to be more or less functional, people live normal lives, things are just less stable and available than it had been before >only real problem seems to be scarcity of resources and brutal road bandits >second film >people are living at an absolute minimum trying to survive >the old world seems to be literally gone (the pilot guy talks about how much he misses "clean ladies", even though in the first film there were plenty of them) What exactly happened between the making of the first and the second? Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)04:43:38 No. 197741210 ► Degeneration Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)04:46:51 No. 197741303 >>197744717 >>197748384 >>197740949 (OP) Nuclear war. Anonymous 03/30/24(Sat)11:59:52 No.197754063 >>197740949 (OP) Emu Wars

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Least insane /r9k/user | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Mentally III Contest BiG D--- 240 KB JPG 03/27/24(Wed)11:28:49 No.76915160 >Sertraline 100mg Ok robots, it's time to find out who's the most mentally ill. Post your medication routine. Lengthiest list & strongest medications win. For me: >Valium 10mg 2x daily >Ambien 10mg nightly >Propranolol 40mg PRN >Buspirone 15mg >Clonidine 0.3 PRN >Vyvanse 50mg daily ⠀ Anonymous 03/27/24(Wed)11:29:37 No.76915171 >>76915160 (OP) # I think the people who would win this contest are too dead to answer.

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Greentext Stories - The Red Cow Project | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Board /b/ - Random Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 04/01/24(Mon)12:31:54 No.916233450 379 KB PNG >Be me, a cow in the heart of Texas >Eating my grass >Jewish guy approaches me >He tells me that I am the most perfect cow in the world >Tells me that I am special >Surprisingly he doesn't eat my s--- like other cow worshippers do >He takes me on a trip to Israel instead of being turned into a burger >Treats me like a god for the whole journey >Then he f------ burns me alive

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