Italian Brainrot Animals
Mateus Lima • 15 days ago
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Uploaded by statue345 Sep 01, 2014 at 11:04PM EDT
4chan dungeons and dragons /tg/ ccourage the coawardly dog
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![□ Anonymous 1 hour ago No 97329795 [r] 22973296丛2297330224 There are only two ways to beat the monster lord and her daughters; either to have godlike self restraint or to out-f--- them. Anonymous 54 mmutes ago No 9733022시 ▼)2297330281 >>97330424 2297330446 2297330613 >>97330525 22973305盟2297330654 2297330734 They need to send in someone with harem-MC-tier denseness/innocence, so when they try to make a move on him he wont catch on >"EXCUSE ME, I REALLY NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM Lilim No you fool, you need to dig deeper. You need to go f------ simple shonen protagonist dense ! Anonymous 47 mrutes ago No 97330525 [▼] 22973306 image ing (10 KB, 186x139) google indb 2297330734 an anime about a dense MC who faces the demon lord all the monsters fall for him because he's the only one that can resist cant □ Anonymous 36 minutes ago No 97331042 [r] >297331090 >>97331201 2297331426 Yes your tail is indeed quite fluffy, but what does this have to do with the task at hand? > You're a level 3 paladin of Pelor. You literally have an aura of chasteness You are given a missive from the high priest, instructing you to slay a terrible demoness s It does not take long to send you to her realm. In fact it's rather too easy for your ling You're contronted by a daughter of the demon lord himself She invites you inside, giggling while licking her fingers > You puff out your chest and proclaim your purpose > You tell her you don't follow, and she facepaims "SEX. Sex. You and I. Were going to have it > She begins slamming her head on a nearby wall BECAUSE THAT IS WHY YOU WERE SENT HERE "Well there's that lovely gentleman standing behind yo. Oh..well maybe you'll find the right guy for you some day > "They sent YOU on purpose. oint they? Just to drive me insane?" "BECAUSE CLEARLY, NO ONE ELSE IS AS DENSE AS A NEUTRON STAR Do you even know who I am? WHAT I am? □ Anonymous 17 minutes ago No 9733 1600 [r] 2297331752 2297331758 1319491799170 gif (1.77 MB, 300x174) gogle indh Dad chimes in from the background, "Hey Angry, Im dad. □ Anonymous 12 minutes ago No 97331752 [▼] 2297331793 2297332064 The paladin and her father are the two densest men to ever exist Become fast friends and empathize with how hard it is to understand what these monster girls want Anonymous 3 minutes ago No 97332064 [▼1 2297332134 2297332152 2297332151 22973321 > To be honest, Im still kinda confused how I ended up with daughters in the first place "YOU HAD SEX WITH MOM. THREE TIMES! ONCE FOR EACH OF US! s Sorry son, cant say Iam. Say, have I shown you my trophy collection yet?" She runs off, Demon Lord and Paladin go tour the house > t's himl He's the one who wont have sex with me!" > 거oney. I dont think you quite understand The only way was able to have sex with your father was by distracting him with a piece of bacon. f that man is ust as dense. you're never gong to get any Tm sure it'll all work out sweetie. Now calm down before you blow another hole in reality She strips naked, then bounds up to the Paladin s He double takes, then averts his eyes while offering out his cloak > Honey, what in the world are you doing? I's not bath time for another hour > "You know, Sir, perhaps such impure thoughts have made her feel unclean > 1 think you're on to something here. Go take a bath honey BONUS Tll drip honey all aver you, and lick it off slowly >"Do you need a plate or a bowl or something? Honey is pretty sticky、It would be a lot easier that way. I could also make warnor Beegris see Warrior Beegirls take him captive and take him to their queen and assume the MC caused it □ Anonymous 9 hours ago No. 97333057 [▼] 2297333394 Warrior beegiril tries to By him to the queen, but is weighed down because the guy's head is denser than gold >Drags him along while he complains about how his armor is being scuffed up by the rough cave floor Head leaving a rut in the ground as this happens Finally plopped in front of the queen beegirl: warrior beegirl goes to wash herself of the stupidity >Really? Do you have any board games lying around? Those are a lot of fun to play. Ill wam you, though-Ive never lost a game of Scrabble in my entire Minutes later a thundering scream from the inner sanctum of the hive is heard from miles away □ Anonymous 9 hours ago No 97333394 [▼] 2297333944 Tumbles out of the beehive as it falls into chaos, manages to catch fire, etc a group of flower type monstergirls gather around him as he casualy strolls out >"Thank you for freeing us from those oppressive bees, hero. You'l be rewarded "Oh cool, do you have any sunscreen? Sun's pretty bright today and I've got a None? Damn, I guess I could use some new boots, these ones are getting pretty wom out](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/000/822/375/9e7.png "9e7.png")
![□ Anonymous 07/29/12(Sun)15:49 No.2009 1587 [r] >>2009 1614 >>20091617 >>20091620 >>2009 1634 >>20091642 >>20091643 >-20091686 >>2009 1843 >>2009 1876 milwaukee-sawzall-blades-2.ipg (29 KB, 300x300) igdb google /tg/, this thread disturbs me because l used to work in a hospital. And yes, people come in every once in a while to get really weird stuff removed from their ass. You don't want to know most of it. But one of the worst ones? 47 of these f------ things. Please stop shoving stuff up your ass. Physicians are sick of removing it. Our science requires us to remove the stuff your science demands you shove up your ass. Think of your doctor, /tg/. Think of your doctor.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/822/163/6cf.png "6cf.png")
![I followed after Gorg, and we journeyed far south. Here, the gods we served had different names than the one's we were accustomed to, but the God of War was still the God of War. We chased after rumors o and I learned the useful trick of shifting a person's desir o the desire t Il him everything they Ceret was indeed a demigod, and she had the dreadful ability to never miss with her bow. After observing her devastate a group of bandits while standing on a distant mountain, org decided it would be best to try and befriend the woman. I was somewhat surprised, since Qorg was the last person I had ever thought would try to avoid a battle, but as we melded into the group of warrior-priests, I realized these people were just the kind that Qorg liked best Ater meeting with Ceret, I found her to be rather amiable, and Oorg was practically smitten with her. She was bold and beautiful (like most divine beings were), and could fire four arrows from her bow and strike the h coming from each of the four directions. Utterly devoted to the God We ron It was an odd time, because l n, and Oorg w ill nursing the wound of losing to his rival i than willing to give him some timg to sof a simply emigod who served the God of Nature, who h a disastro Ceret's arrows turned to ash as they neared him, and org was stubbomly trying to hide his divinity. I the end, I rode forth, my pride far exceeding my Awakening in the Halls of the Immortals, I realized it had been many centuries since I had returned there I felt compelled to wander the pristine halls, and only once I had reached the Gardens of Desire that I realized why the urge to wande r had overcome me Anonymous 01/05/13(Sat)20 49 No 22420616 The God of Desire did not want to approach me, he wanted me to approach him. Though he was a than that between a king and a rat that dwelt within the sewers. My God wanted to know how I had promoted desire throughout the land, and I could only answer that I had prevented people from reaching I was offered a few bits of advice, mostly that denying people satisfaction for too long would simply kill their desire, but also that providing satisfaction would prevent their desires from growing too strong. Too strong desires, he warned, led to people's ruin far more than anything else. I thanked my god, then was left to wonder just how much the God of Desire knew about my own desires. When I returned to the mortal world, I decided it was best to leave Qorg to himself and to spend some time with Handelhan. Mostly, it was because I really couldn't just return from the dead without blowing Gorg's whole attempt at poorly pretending to be a monal, but also because Handelhan had been spending Anonymous 0105/13(Sat)20:50 No.22420633 He asked me to help twist the desires of several people within his library and academy, and also allowed me to observe some of his experiments. Some of these were performed on himself, as he was trying to find a way to remove only a portion of a person's dvinity rather than all of it, partially so that he could potentially transfer Brask's weapon skills to Qorg. A more pressing goal for him was his attempts at increasing the longevity of mortals. While working amongst the researchers, I found out that Handelhan had actually managed to get himself a mortal wife a decade ago. When I asked Handelhan about this, he said that I should understand how powerful desires be, and he had fallen in love with a researcher after reading her mind and becoming hopelessly enamo The fact that she was quite beautiful might hare also played a part. Though she was still rather young, it would be only a few decades before her lifespan was over, and ndelhan would not permit something li Anonymous 01/05/13(Sat)20:51 No.22420646 captured demigods left, Handelhan lling to give a his dmn s facing were quite high. He had to not only successfully split his dvinit successfully transfer it to a mortal, something we weren't even certain was possible. In theory, there was a chance it would work, but there were so many complicatians that could occur that I was very reluctant o try before we were certain t we were doin n was workin with his wife not becoming any younger. Aer ssisting him in his experiments, he asked me to help either Pleth or Gorg capture a demigod as soon as possible, in order to try and transfer their power to his wife. As I left to join up with Pleth, he mentioned casually that he'd prefer it if the demigod was a servant of Desire Pleth and the cuit of the One-eyed Tree were constructing a rather grand temple when I met up with him. After telling him about Handelhan's wife, which Pleth referred to as Handelhan's folly, Itried my best to persuade him to help Handelhan in his endeavor. Though Pleth argued that a mortal's death was as natural as their life, and that granting one divinity would go against nature, I bullied him by saying that we all owed Handelhan for his many years of hard work Anonymous 0105 13(Sat]20.51 No.22420655 Ater adorning ourseves in the garments of pilgrims, we left the construction of the temple in the hands of a young but brilliant architect, who promised to finish it within thirty years. With swarms of bloodthirsty birds and beasts surrounding the temple as its guardians, we journeyed off to meet with Qorg. We listened to rumors along the way, with an ear out for anything that might lead us to a demigad of desire. After hearing our fill af bawdy tales, I concluded that unless every second brathel really did contain we to our questianing Oorg was in a much better state than when I last left him. Though he had not managed to kill the fire-controlling demigod, my suicide rush had provided Ceret's followers a moment of reprieve from the flames, allowing them to escape. It had also provided Qorg and Ceret something to mourn together though Qorg apolagized for shedding crocodile tears in my name. Either way, he had grown quite close to Ceret, though she likely was starting to suspect his divinity 01/05/13(Sat)20:52 No 22420675 After reintroducing myself to Ceret as my old self's younger brother, she had enough tact to go alang wit it. Pleth immediately confessed his love for her, which lead Corg to shatter the clay jug he was drinking from, but Ceret promptly recognized the joke for what it was Qorg listened intently when I told him of Handelhan's plight, and he too began to call it Handelhan's folly He said it would upset all our plans, and might even end up resulting in some terrible catastrophe. Even so, he agreed to help, and parted ways wth Ceret's company To our surprise, it wasn't long before Handelhan himself joined up with us, and the four of us couldn't help but celebrate our reunion loudly within the nearest towwn. As we recovered the next day, Handelhan explained his plan to us, which I didnt like from the very start but withheld my comments until he had In order to capture a demigod of Desire, he wanted me to spur desire within the land, forcing it into the minds and lives of everyone. He wanted the worship of Desire to grow until it wild and in the open, and when demigods of desire would emerge proudly. He also wanted it done quickly I was about to ask how exactly he proposed for me to do this, but he already had an answer prepared. My task, he explained, would be to convince people that they could satisfy their yearning for love with s Anonymous 01.05/13(Sat)20:54 No.22420696 ite sure whether I wanted to argue quite certain his p but also explained that there naturally needed to be some opposition. He wanted me to spare the followers of the One-eyed Tree, and they would serve as a gathering ground for the dissenters With Pleth guiding his followers, and Qorg protecting me as I rode throughout the villages and tons, Handelhan would lay down a network to gather information about the progress of desire and any potential demigods It was an odd plan, but both Pleth and Qorg were cunious to see what would happen. With a decade as our time limit, they felt it was worth spending that short period of time indulging in Handelhan's plan, and if it failed, Handelhan could only blame himself So, I began my ride throughout the first town, clad in a cloak of red Pleth assured me that there were none of his followers within that tow, so l used my power on anyone I came near. There were no immediate effects, and when I rode out that night, I left the town without seeing any of my power at work In the next town, clad in a cloak of green, I began my work again. tt was odd work, because I wasn't ure nvince peop s the proof of love, and to obtain sex was the same as obtaining love, but what any of that would do to further Handelhan's plan was anyone's guess. Anonymous 01.05/13(Sat) 20:58 No.22420764 In the sixth town, while wearing a cloak of blue, Ibegan to hear rumors. Likely, it was because I was lis tening for these kind of rumors, but the housewives who stood at the street comers seemed to have I rode throughout the country, Qorg and chaos following in my wake, and by the end of the first year Handelhan said that he had some encouraging information to offer In the part of the country I had riddern d and brothels had made enormous profits people were h it all meant, he simply said to continue what I was the r And so, I rode, never spending more than a few days in each town I visited. I used my power on beggars soldiers, bakers, knights, lords, merchants, milkmaids, poets and schola n anyone u what was](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/000/822/154/52b.png "3/7")
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