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Interracial relations

Last posted Oct 17, 2012 at 11:48PM EDT. Added Oct 08, 2012 at 06:13PM EDT
41 posts from 24 users

So… From my previous thread about Internet dating. I am no longer searching.

All my previous relationships have been with a race other than the my own. I think it's awesome. I'm white btw

but even in 2012 I still get the crazy eye from people when im out with my girl.

So, forums, how do you feel about interracial relationships?

A: Congratulations (from what it sounds like)

B: I live in one of the most diverse cities in North America, in one of the most liberal and "forward-thinking" areas in North America, so to me, interracial relationships, both platonic and romantic, are as normal as the sun and rain. I'm honestly kind of surprised that people would give you the "crazy eye" in this day and age, but I guess that's just a product of where you live versus where I live.

Also, Alex, you just said Verbose's magic words: "Relationships."
 
 
Ya dun goofed. Ya dun goofed REAL good.


Now that that's out of the way, I think people generally feel two ways about them, and it's not as simple as "Pro" and "Anti."

Most people would say that they are OK with interracial relationships. Since this is a forum embedded in Web Culture, I would anticipate that most people here would be in favor of them.
 
But! (Haha…iz funneh cuz white gurls dun have it lolz) I would figure that most people here are more attracted to white women (because most of us are straight, white males,) even if they are OK with others dating.

In this instance, you're OK with something you'll practically never need to be OK with personally. Let me pose this: I think Alex would be the exception here when he says he ends up dating people of another race. If people have dated here (because there are a lot of teens who haven't had the opportunity yet,) then I would bet it was a white person.

Now statistically, yeah, even I'm more likely to date a white girl, because there simply aren't that many black girls who are interested in the same things that I am in, even though we share some aspects of culture.

  • I play light-hearted video games like Kirby and Pokemon along with strategy games like Fire Emblem and Advance Wars
  • Even though I don't watch it due to time, I really do like anime beyond Dragonball Z.
  • I listen to music that includes jazz, but more often than not, it's video game music, chiptunes, rock, or something from Japan.
  • I don't like to go out much, and I don't like loud music.

These are not activities your stereotypical black girl would be interested in. The ones who would be interested in such things would be at a convention of some sort.

I rarely see black girls at conventions. At BronyCon, I don't actually remember seeing a black girl. I'm not sure if I saw a black guy, actually…
 
opspe, you sure that wasn't a KKK meetin'?
 
Close encounters with the implicitly racist aside, I don't think we would actually be interested in many black girls nor would they be interested in us. The interests are too different on the whole. And when you look at girls with your interests, they are likely white.

So in practicality, most of us are OK with interracial dating, but most of us would never date a black girl (and statistically, a girl of any other racial minority in the US), regardless of our own race.
 
And just like we've been trained from a young age to believe certain things, we've been trained to like certain things as well. That training gets to a point where it goes beyond learning and it becomes embedded into your actual likes and dislikes.

Sometimes, a person can overcome that constant reinforcement from society about what you should believe and what you should like. For example, a lot of you live in a culture where identifying as Atheist or Agnostic is not the norm, but you came to that conclusion regardless.

But those are things people could honestly question. Whether or not you've been trained to like certain foods or certain colors tends to not be things you question.

That most certainly is the case for romantic attraction. In fact, I imagine some people frown upon questioning why you're attracted to certain people. So if that is the case, then everything that men (and women) have been trained to like in regards to romance will always have been heavily influenced by society. And even though the Internet tends to be a different area of society, I don't think it ever gets into questioning what you like physically, emotionally, in regards to personality, or anything.

Much like most people, the Web probably thinks that romantic attraction is an individual and unique thing.

It is not. There is "generally attractive" and there is "generally unattractive." People date based upon it. Here's an article, because I don't want to post anything really dense, but generally, romance is rather straightforward. If you are attractive enough (or have enough "romantic" capital whether it be money, power, physical attractiveness, etc.), then you can date more people than someone with less of those.

Love feels magical, but it really isn't. It's an trade of what you can get for what you have. That's nothing particularly novel or unexplainable.


Digressions!
 
Anyway, the other stance would be too simplistic. Yes, people should be able to date whomever they want.

But you have to note that not all people (even more liberal people) feel that way.

For example, you guys know me, right? I'm fairly articulate. I'm smart enough. I don't think I look too bad. Yeah, I'm really short, but I'm still taller than some girls. I'm nice enough. Went to a decent college, and I'm going to a great grad school.

So you would think that the reason a girl's parents wouldn't be OK with me dating their daughter would be due to me not being those things.

Not really. The mother of this one girl didn't let her daughter see me, and the girl wouldn't tell her father, because she thought he would shoot me (not joking.)

That was in 2005. I believe all of you were alive for that. And it was specifically because I was (and am) black. It didn't matter that I was at the top of my class, school president, played varsity football, did all sorts of extracurricular activities, and stuff like that. She (the mother) just didn't think that black people should date white people.
 
I did not talk to her dad, because bullets hurt. We didn't tell him.
 
Anyway, after trying to see each other where we could, it just got too complicated, so things broke off naturally.
 
Now that isn't really the norm, but like Alex said, I get a lot of weird looks just by walking with a single, white girl even as friends. Especially from black girls. It's something that most people don't consider unless you've been there before. Relationships are awkward at the beginning, and a string of otherwise not-notable events can ruin it before things get started.

In some interracial relationships, you get those looks all of the time. You get comments from your parents.
 
"Oh, (Verbose.) You went on a date?"
"Yeah, Dad."
"She white?"

Like, all the time.

I'd imagine that if you dated a black girl who was nice but was somewhat…"ethnic," as my family might say, your parents might be concerned. That girl would have to be next to perfect in what she did and said just to get to a point of trust, just like a somewhat shady acting guy has to be perfect longer than an unassuming girl who's quiet and really sweet to earn your trust.

That isn't to say that I don't approve. But I always, always, always have to consider that when I'm out on a date.

It's kinda stressful, really.


tl;dr: I likea teh white womens.

Thank you, Uncle Ruckus. Well put, like always.

Last edited Oct 08, 2012 at 07:30PM EDT

I'm not sure where you live, but I basically live in Whitetown USA (it's nice here, there's just a lot of white people) but I still occasionally see interracial relationships, and I don't notice anyone even batting an eye at it. I myself once dated a peurto rican (I am also white). It's not very surprising that it's generally thought of as normal where I live though, I live in a city with a very strong GLBT community and there are even several gay-friendly churches. So I don't think "different" couples are a big deal here.

Verbose wrote:

I rarely see black girls at conventions. At BronyCon, I don’t actually remember seeing a black girl.

Irony of ironies, I happen to have a picture of a black girl cosplaying as Applejack at the con. So I guess it wasn't a KKK meeting after all. I was deluded.

And I knew you'd be salivating to post in this thread as soon as you saw it.

ANYWAYS.

You bring up interesting points about the intricacies of the "pro" and "anti" arguments. But like I said, where you live has a lot to do with it. According to the map, y'all live in the South. I've never been to the South (Hampton Roads, VA doesn't really count), but I can imagine that things are very, very different. Verbose mentioned that one girl's parents were not…receptive to her going out with a black guy. Interestingly, I've heard similar stories around here. Except that they usually involve Asian parents disapproving of their daughters dating white men.

Now, we could come up with all kinds of viral analogies to describe interracial attraction, but the fact remains that in the modern, globalized world, the concept of "racial purity" is eroding. If you look at Mexico, and in fact all Spanish-speaking Latin American countries (except for Chile, Argentina, Peru, Bolivia, and Costa Rica) the majority of the population is mestizo, which is a broad term to describe any number of shared heritages between various indigenous groups, Europeans, and African slaves. Many of these countries, and especially Mexico, have used this shared mixed heritage as the basis for a national identity, even if the, ah, whiter peoples have traditionally been in charge.

And now with minority groups together providing a majority over whites in some areas of the US, interracial mixing really is the way of the future. A lot of older people may be against that, but our generation is generally more tolerant, due to the simple practicality of it. So as morbid as it sounds, as the older bigots die off, society will continue to become more and more tolerant of such practices. (That's my prediction at least)

As I am prejudiced against ALL the races, I believe interracial relationships are okay as long as it's between the inferior races, the inferior races being all of them. So if you're a pastyass cracker who wants to date a chink or a coon, it's alright in my book.

Take racist attitudes far enough and they become like more uncouth progressive attitudes.

Date whoever you want. Be it man, woman, black, white, blue, or green. As long as your happy, that's all that matters. In other words, I don't care. I shouldn't care, because it has nothing to do with me.

@Verbose:
I herd u leiked Twilight?
Allow me to introduce you:

*puts on romantic music*
*gives thumbs up to Verbose and winks while mouthing "I got your back bro!"*
*retreats silently, stupid grin still on face*


In all seriousness though Alex, I would just like to point out that the looks you are getting would have been a LOT more if your genders were reversed, it's a lot harder for white girls with non-white guys couples to be accepted, both by society and the girl herself.
I'm not trying to crush your dreams here Verbs, remember: I'm non-white guy myself….. race-wise at least, skin-wise I'm pale as milk complete with green eyes, and yet I get a far worse treatment because of my birthplace than the one I would get if I was of African origins.
So yeah…. hope for me is non-existent.
EDIT: Just read Olivia's charts…. It appears I was wrong (dating-wise at least), This is very interesting…

As for my opinion on interraciaI couples: I know for a fact that nature appreciates diversity.
That should be sufficient.

Oh and Congratulations!

Last edited Oct 08, 2012 at 08:28PM EDT

I'm going to echo Gespenst on this one. I don't really see skin color as a factor. Period.

I doubt I would care at all if I went on a date with an Asian, Indian or African. What matters to me is their character, not their skin color.

Likewise I couldn't care less if I saw some other interracial couple do it. In New Zealand it happens on a regular basis where Europeans hook up with Maori. It's pretty normal

Anything who thinks it isn't normal needs to get out into the world more

Reticent wrote:

I'm a fairly white male, and for as long as I can remember I've had an inexplicable attraction to Asian girls.



Although it's far more explicable with pictures of Christina Lee lying around.

This reminds me: yellow fever, no matter how much of a "mild" or "benign" preference you think it is, is a huge turnoff :\

Related good.is article.

Last edited Oct 08, 2012 at 10:32PM EDT

Like Olivia's chart sort of hints at, some races appear to be generally more desirable. Granted, when you're dating online, you don't have a whole lot of information to go off of.

But with that in mind, if race really didn't matter, then there wouldn't be so many black women and men with a lack of responses (especially black women. I can't remember where, but I remember seeing a documentary about Asian men are the least desirable of men and black women are the least desirable of women.)

Anyone care to explain? Meanwhile, I'll be gathering my panther brethren ready to irrationally assault answer I don't like.

What strikethrough.

Verbose wrote:

Like Olivia's chart sort of hints at, some races appear to be generally more desirable. Granted, when you're dating online, you don't have a whole lot of information to go off of.

But with that in mind, if race really didn't matter, then there wouldn't be so many black women and men with a lack of responses (especially black women. I can't remember where, but I remember seeing a documentary about Asian men are the least desirable of men and black women are the least desirable of women.)

Anyone care to explain? Meanwhile, I'll be gathering my panther brethren ready to irrationally assault answer I don't like.

What strikethrough.

To make a subtle distinction: more desired != more desirable.

Olivia Gulin wrote:

To make a subtle distinction: more desired != more desirable.

That's a very good point, even if it is subtle. Everyone has, and is entitled to, their own opinions, no matter what the prevailing archetype for beauty or desirability is. This is basically what I sort of think of as "high school attraction syndrome": a lot of the most popular kids, the most desired kids, are also complete jackasses, which makes them rather undesirable.

But can the same be applied to races? I don't think it does, since it tends to be more of a matter of personal opinion (especially since I tend to want to avoid sweeping generalizations about racial characteristics).

Olivia Gulin wrote:

This reminds me: yellow fever, no matter how much of a "mild" or "benign" preference you think it is, is a huge turnoff :\

Related good.is article.

I don't mean to be rude, but this kind of pisses me off. Not the article, but the fact that an attraction is immediately labeled as "Yellow fever" without basis. It's not as if I systematically selected the ethnicity of people I'm attracted to based on a set of hollow stereotypes. That's like assuming that a gay man, after evaluating the positive and negative qualities of both genders, decided that he just prefers men. You wouldn't look down on a white man being attracted to white women, so why isn't it possible to a white man being attracted to asian women? It's not a conscious decision, it's just a genetic roll of the dice.

/rant

Last edited Oct 09, 2012 at 01:30AM EDT

X-Singular wrote:

race-wise at least, skin-wise I’m pale as milk complete with green eyes

>Claims to be Arab
>Claims to be Celestia Whoreshipper
>Is whiter than bleached milk


On a more serious note, I was thinking a long time ago about what kind of ethnicity of chicks I like and I found an epiphany. I LIKE ALL DEM WIMMENZ! Why limit myself to one ethnicity when I can appreciate the beauty in all of them?

That being said, I'm marrying an Arab girl so there's that. :P

Ah, see what happens when I don't spend every waking moment reading the forums? I miss another great topic! There was a lot brought up here I'd like to address, let me see…

In general, I don't think there's anything wrong with interracial relationships, but there's an odd conundrum involved there. On the one hand, if I, as a white man chose to never date a black woman, I'd likely be considered racist. On the other hand, if I dated and married a black woman, and we had children, isn't there also a more subtle problem there? There is a certain amount of distinctness in both of our cultures that is lost in our children. In some sense they would be both back and white, but in another sense they would be neither. I feel like modern America has an enthusiasm for multiculturalism, and while it's good for us to be connected in a special way despite our differences, a high incidence of such racial and cultural mixing causes a shrinking of both cultures. Maybe it would be good if we were all mixed-race, but then what happens to culture?

As it happens, I did date a black woman when I was in college, and it did turn out to produce some complications in my life, but not of the sort most people expect. I learned an interesting concept from C.S. Lewis' The Screwtape Letters: for almost every vice, there is an equal and opposite vice. I already expected it existed, but I got to experience first-hand what I considered the flip-side to racism.

Go back to my sophomore year; I was dating this (white) girl and things seemed to be going well, but one day we were sitting in her dorm room and she was making some comment about cheesy couples that are all blonde-haired, blue-eyed, and pale-skinned. Her friend in the room with us said, "Like you two?" My girlfriend looked a mix of shocked and confused, while I busted up laughing at the irony of the conversation. She broke up with me less than a week later.

Okay, back to senior year, and me dating a black woman. Bodily, she wasn't really my "type", and she had a strange sense of humor I never quite figured out, but she was pretty and fun, and we dated for quite some time. However, the longer I dated her, the more I got to know about her interests. She liked to read fantasy novels with dragons and elves and such, which I'd never really been into, and while she liked sci-fi, every book she recommended to me was (in my opinion) really of sub-par quality. She also was a member of the local SCA, which I also found quite silly. My main interests were video games, contract bridge, and political discussion, none of which were of interest to her. Putting all of that together, while there was nothing wrong with her, it didn't take me long to realize we were a terrible mismatch, although she never noticed. Nonetheless, and this is the vital part, everywhere we went together, both acquaintances and strangers would take the time to tell us, "You two are a wonderful couple!" I usually wanted to reply, "No, we're not," but held my tongue out of politeness. I was pretty sure that what I was seeing was people spotting us together and somewhere in the back of their brain--probably not even consciously--they thought, Ah, here's a chance to demonstrate that I am not racist!

The fact that nobody ever gave me such a complement when with any of my previous white girlfriends spoke to me that these complements were actually also racist, just a weird kind of reverse racism. It seems to me that if race didn't matter, then we wouldn't have random people approaching us to approve of our relationship. In fact, this was the only girlfriend I ever had concerning whom my mother had something positive to say. "She's very nice!" she told me the day she met her, even though at the time, as was fairly usual at my apartment, a bunch of my friends were hanging around playing cards while she sat in a corner reading a book; my mother had exchanged less than a dozen words with her.

However, my closest friends, a group of guys I'd known since freshman year, would say nothing when she was around, and when she wasn't, there would be a chorus of, "What the hell, Brucker?! She is so wrong for you!" I'd sigh and respond, "Yeah, I know. I mean, she's pretty, but personality-wise? I feel like I'm dating an 11-year old white boy." Eventually I broke up with her, but it was weird; partially because in the past I'd always been the one getting dumped, and partially because the only way I could explain it to her was something like, "You're a really nice person, but frankly, it's boring me to death."

Okay, that's the personal stuff out of the way, here's my reflections on the thread:

I think Verbose has some valid points about who we are socially relating to certain racial groups more than others. The girlfriend mentioned in my previous post was someone I met at work, and I've noticed that workplaces tend to be more culturally diverse than a lot of other places. In college, once I declared my major as Mathematics, I found that the students my math classes were almost entirely white, with a few Asians and at most two Hispanics. I don't think other races can't do math, but rather I've theorized that when a member of a minority that has had to face oppression gets into college, they tend to be drawn towards social sciences.

Meanwhile, as an adult my personal activities have involved things either church-related or comics-related. We all know the latter involves mainly white males, although exceptions do exist; the former is an odd one because I've noticed for whatever reason, churches seem to self-segregate. Our church has black, Hispanic, and Asian members, but they're pretty sparse.

Something about Harley "Crimson" Locks' post brought up a memory that may show how strange prejudices can be. I also knew a same-sex female couple in college that were in a long-term committed relationship (if they're still together, which last I heard they were, it's about 25 years now). However one of the girls had some sort of lesbian group that she hung out with, and they disapproved of her relationship. Why? The other girl was bisexual, and somehow that was a betrayal to the lesbian community! Go figure.

Olivia's question remains unanswered, but I think it's a very interesting one. If you are a mixed-race person, does that automatically mean that any relationship you have is interracial, or perhaps is it not interracial to date someone who is a member of a race that is part of your heritage, or more so if you dated someone with the same racial mix? These can be vital questions when in a situation in which race matters: Years ago there was a story that made national news about a high school principal in the south who called together the senior class to inform them that the upcoming prom would only allow white girls with white boys, and black girls with black boys. Probably the most offended member of the audience was young woman who was racially mixed; she raised her hand and asked why this rule was being enacted, and who was she supposed to go to the prom with? The principal actually replied, "I am enacting this policy to prevent further mistakes like you." That principal lost his job, and none too soon in my opinion.

The statistical charts are very interesting, but also shocking. Not only are back women apparently undesirable, but apparently nobody is rejecting them as much as black males! On the other hand, black males are disproportionately being rejected by black females as well. There's something very wrong with this picture.

Pseudogenesis' interchange with Olivia on so-called "yellow fever" is an interesting issue that I don't know whether it has been ever really studied in a non-biased manner (or if that's even possible). I suspect people on both sides of such relational transactions have theories about what it really means. I'm going to be open here about a few personal things once again. #1: Asians – I've never quite felt like I've had an Asian "fetish", but honestly, I have noticed that it's very rare for me to find an Asian unattractive. I think there is some assumption that this sort of attraction is based on stereotypes about Asian women. Maybe for some people, but I know for me, regardless of physical attractiveness of a potential mate, I never had sex with someone that I didn't get to know fairly well first, because personality is more important than looks in the long run. Therefore, although I've never had an Asian girlfriend, if I had, I wouldn't have done so without taking the time to get beyond any assumptions I had about her based on first impressions. Also, one of the most beautiful Asian girls I've ever met was in my freshman year of college, and you only had to be around her for five minutes before you realized her personality was miles away from stereotypes of Asian women. So as Pseudo says, it may be that there is just something some people find attractive that happens to be common among Asians. #2: Mexicans – If there was a race I've ever had a fetish for, it would have to be Mexicans. Living my whole life in California, I've always gone to school with a fair number of Hispanic students, and usually, the hottest girl in any class I was in was, in my opinion, one of the Mexican girls. Now while there were other factors that may have qualified this as a racial fetish, I have noticed that there are girls of other races that I've found attractive, and it was because of qualities that are common among Mexicans. Long, straight, dark hair, dark eyes, a light-brown complexion, and perhaps an alluring accent. So is it a racial fetish if I'm attracted to Mexicans, Middle-Easterners, South Asians, and Pacific Islanders?

In the end, though, there are plenty of fetishes about certain physical characteristics that make someone attractive, and you may not even notice them in yourself. For instance, although I used to think that all the girlfriends I've had looked very different from one another, there came a point in my life when I realized I'd had three girlfriends that were zaftig redheads. And I married the third one, so there!

@Brucker

and while it’s good for us to be connected in a special way despite our differences, a high incidence of such racial and cultural mixing causes a shrinking of both cultures. Maybe it would be good if we were all mixed-race, but then what happens to culture?

It sounds like your argument here is that by mixing human breeds, you can also in turn damage cultures used by pure breeds as if they both get replaced by another one

You may be able to point to cases such as the one here in NZ where Maori and Europeans have been cross breeding for a good amount of time. During that, the European culture dominated while the Maori culture diminished. However I think you are correlating the wrong causations if you imply that crossbreeding had anything to do with that.

It was never a case of two cultures shrinking, more like one forcing themselves on the other to the point where Maori are forced to speak english (the europeans had a significant upper hand in enforcing their rules so to speak). This all happened back in the time before political correctness existed and the Crown believed it was their way or the highway. Maori culture was chased away during those years because the colonists wanted the country to run their way.

I doubt that the act of interracial relations had any major part in that for a few reasons:

1. Maori culture isn't being suppressed anymore by land grabbing British colonists and now Maori culture is flourishing back to the surface

2. Interracial relations are stronger in the country now than it has ever been and the return of Maori culture, language and heritage does not appear to be discouraged by this

3. I know plenty of Maori children with a European parent who still remain proud of their Maori heritage and stick to it, despite not having two parents from that same culture. Likewise the opposite applies as well.

4. Kiwi's have been sharing pants for so many centuries that virtually all native NZ'ers share both European and Maori blood (except me, I'm too American), At this point we do have a mashup culture containing traits from both but the originals are still there as well.

I'm pretty sure the matter is quite similar for Aboriginal cultures in Australia too. Those guys went through pretty much the same thing

I can see where you can obtain your concern, Brucker. But from the real life case studies I have witnessed, I don't really see it. I don't see cultures going anywhere just because some people have parents that hail from more than one. Cultures are always remembered, at least in this country they are.

PS: New Zealand is a great case study for multiculturalism in general if you are interested in that kind of this. We have just about every single culture equally distributed through the whole country: Westerners, Asians, Europeans, Africans, Indians, Islanders, Christians, Muslims, Hindu, Buddhists, Scientologists, you name it.

Last edited Oct 11, 2012 at 10:24PM EDT

I'm certainly not implying that loss of culture is the inevitable effect of interracial crossbreeding. As I've mentioned many times, I'm half-Jewish, and while I don't consider myself to be a practicing Jew, I do like to think of myself as a cultural Jew. I think I have a pretty good grasp on not only the culture of my father's family (Jewish Austrian), and my mother's family (Unitarian English), but also the culture of my in-laws (Fundamentalist Christian Germans).

The thing I'm saying is that if the charts Olivia posted are to be believed as typical, then apparently the last thing an African-American is looking for in a mate is another African-American. If such a cultural trend were strong enough and went on long enough, we'd eventually not have any (pure) African-Americans left. I realize studies have shown that very few people are really genetically "pure", but certainly we could get to a time when there would be almost nobody in the U.S. who was at least 50% African unless they were the children of recent immigrants.

I like what you are saying about NZ being ethnically diverse, but that's the thing, in a way. The dictionary defines "diversity" as "the state or fact of being diverse; difference; unlikeness." It seems to me that by that definition, the more people mix together their cultures--whether by interbreeding or simply integrating--the less diversity we have. So it's a trade-off, and I wonder to what extent is it a positive one? I don't think there's a clear, objective answer to that, unfortunately.

Personally, I think the degradation of diverse culture in favour of a more ethnically diverse melting pot is a more than adequate tradeoff. I'm far more practical than traditional, so anything that helps to lessen the effects of racism and prejudice is welcome in my eyes, even if a few sentimental artifacts of the past have to be forgotten. (Christ I sound like an 'ends-justify-the-means' tyrant. Or maybe I've been reading too much Orwellian literature lately. My point still stands, though.)

So it’s a trade-off, and I wonder to what extent is it a positive one? I don’t think there’s a clear, objective answer to that, unfortunately.

Well, I'd wager that a mashup culture that's so intertwined that it is like a single entity is marginally better than an array of segregated cultures that contrast against each other. Society functions much better when it isn't alienated among itself.

Here in Mexico race doesn't really matter in relationships, we've been an interracial culture for more than 400 years. Technically speaking, I'm a white guy, but I'm really mexican and I've been interested in girls with not a particular color tone, altough they tend to be a bit browish.

Not surprisingly, there's a certain attraction to foreign people in my social circles. Tall, blonde and mature german exchange students make most of my female friends go crazy, but it's more likely due to the International factor, rather than a racial one.

We could get more into the real racial issues in my country, but that's not the point of this thread right now.

In my country, interracial relationships look pretty rare. I've never been in a relationship before, but it feels that if you like someone from another race, everyone starts mocking you. I've never actually seen any interracial relationships here in my country, or maybe I don't remember.
Also, I refer to "relationship" to "I love you", not just a one night adventure, because an afroamerican classmate of mine actually dates a white girl.

Digoxin wrote:

In my country, interracial relationships look pretty rare. I've never been in a relationship before, but it feels that if you like someone from another race, everyone starts mocking you. I've never actually seen any interracial relationships here in my country, or maybe I don't remember.
Also, I refer to "relationship" to "I love you", not just a one night adventure, because an afroamerican classmate of mine actually dates a white girl.

Sounds like a pretty lousy place to live. Where do you live?

Hey, look! The gist of my nonsensical moral dilemma was already summed up in a "Liberal Douche Garofalo" image macro:

I may be self-contradictory, but at least I know it!

TL;DR time already?

Well, to put it into my perspective, I moved from a place where I was pretty much the token Asian and everyone else was white to one that's about a third Asian. Needless to say, I was quite disoriented.

For me, I've always found myself more attracted to white guys than anything else. I want to say that race isn't a big factor and that I'm all accepting, but I just don't find Asian guys to particularly stand out. All the okay ones look more or less the same (it's not racist if you're the same race!), and you know me.

And disclaimer: I'm sort of an asexual being, so my opinion is probably meaningless hwew. I don't think about these things too often, and when I do, I usually just shake it off. I've never really been good with relationships, let alone romantic ones, and the past two and only ones I had been in were pathetic failures (both white if you were curious).


I have found that there is some social stigma inherent in interracial relationships though. There's this black male and an asian female couple on campus, and everywhere they go, they get really weird looks, no matter how progressively liberal and accepting everyone claims to be, almost as if they're collectively telepathically signalling "oh no you didn't" to them. And to be honest, it's sort of offputting to me too (I'm sorrrryyyy). Dunno why. Maybe because you'd never really expect that. It's almost unheard of (I think), and people aren't just used to it yet.

Last edited Oct 14, 2012 at 03:00PM EDT
For me, I’ve always found myself more attracted to white guys than anything else. I want to say that race isn’t a big factor and that I’m all accepting, but I just don’t find Asian guys to particularly stand out.



I’m a fairly white male, and for as long as I can remember I’ve had an inexplicable attraction to Asian girls.



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Last edited Oct 14, 2012 at 03:26PM EDT

Twins wrote:

All the okay ones look more or less the same (it’s not racist if you’re the same race!), and you know me.

Actually, it's never racist, really. Psychologists have done studies and found that people who didn't have extensive exposure to members of a particular race in their youth just tend to have a hard time differentiating individual facial features among that race. And after all,

…I moved from a place where I was pretty much the token Asian and everyone else was white…

It's probably similar to the way one's brain has a hard time processing languages that were never heard before about the age of five.

Skeletor-sm

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