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NatRP: The Return (Sign-up Thread)

Last posted Feb 28, 2022 at 08:29PM EST. Added May 05, 2021 at 08:02AM EDT
134 posts from 7 users

Since it's been years since the last game, an easier one, the one I missed out on, and whatever this is, I should give a proper introduction in case none of this is familiar to you.

Welcome to Nation RP, where players guide their nation through the ages.


- The game will progress in the form of Turns. For every turn, each players sends their actions to me in private, and I will write the results. If you want the action to be covert, like if you wanted to cause internal division in other nations or steal their technology, I'll hide them.

- We will start off in the mid to late medieval period and continue something like


Medieval – Exploration – Enlightenment – Industrial – Atomic – Digital

- Like any other RP, the rules are flexible enough for creativity. I'll go into more detail later on.


If you want to join, include your nation's
- Official Name
- Government Type
- Flag (optional)
- History
- Main Cities (sorted in descending importance)

You can claim up to 3 tiles above, describing what you want your land to look like. Don't worry about the colors, that's just how the surrounding land will most likely generate (green – arable land, yellow – desert, blue – bodies of water)

To give people enough time to prepare, Turn 0 will come out in June.
Feel free to ask questions if you need clarification.

Last edited May 05, 2021 at 08:07AM EDT

Can we start out on our own levels of technological development or does everyone have to start out on the same levels of technological development?

Like, say, for example could I start a nation that has tanks, planes and guns while the guy next door is still using swords and shields?

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Can we start out on our own levels of technological development or does everyone have to start out on the same levels of technological development?

Like, say, for example could I start a nation that has tanks, planes and guns while the guy next door is still using swords and shields?

Everyone starts out at similar levels of development, but there is some variation depending on the kind of nation. So if you wanted to have, say, a militaristic nation, then you would be better at fighting, but might struggle in trade or something else that’s different.
It depends on what you want to focus on.

Before I forget, I should mention that players can choose the shape (coastline) of their territory, including mountains and city locations.

Last edited May 05, 2021 at 06:47PM EDT



- Official Name

Kotland

- Government Type

Plutocracy

- History

Originally just the one island, the Merchant-Barons desired to increase their territory through none-military means, as although they had a navy comparable to any of the major powers in the region, they lacked the numbers to field a proper field army with which to successfully attack and conquer the mainland.

Derided as insane at the time, they decided to try and create another island in the shallow coastal waters off the mainland.

Knowing that the other realms would never let them collect the vast quantities of soil needed or sell it to them in the quantities needed at a viable price, they decided to go about it in the only other way available to them.

By collecting and buying any waste, human or animal, they could get their hands on. Most civilised nations produced far more than they could ever use themselves, so they would even pay others to take it off their hands.

For decades, Kotland was the laughing stock of the world, derided for their foolishness and madness of their task. And yet, sack by sack, the ever growing pile in the sea rose higher and higher; just as the wealth of the Merchant-Barons also grew.

Finally after generations of hard work and careful engineering work, the Kotlanders had done it. They had created a brand new, fertile island without a single drop of blood being spilled.

It has been a 100 years since then, and both the original island and the new one have grown since then, with plans to eventually bridge the two islands already set in motion; as well as possible plans to create a bridge to the mainland, pending treaties and diplomacy with the owners of the land themselves.

- Main Cities (sorted in descending importance)

Beeg Yin (Main Island)

Way Jabbeh (New Island)

Braune Nase (Main Island)

Schemel (New Island)

(If you want me to create a less ridiculous nation, please let me know and I'll get one created as soon as I have time.)

Last edited May 05, 2021 at 08:29PM EDT


Nation name: Erztal
Government: Guilds Republic
Main cities: Altlager, Zeughausen, Neulager, Almheim

The mountainous land of Erztal was once a rural backwater province of a larger empire, until rich ore deposits were discovered. Soon mineshafts riddled the mountains and the region became the empire's main source of various metals. As the empire became embroiled in continuous wars it demanded ever more silver and iron. Enslaved enemies, deserters, and convicted criminals were sent by the thousands to Erztal to toil in the mines. Eventually, when word reached Erztal that the tides of war turned against the empire, the prisoners staged a riot which escalated to an all-out uprising. The garrisons that guarded the mines and labour camps, undermanned due to the war, were overrun and brutally murdered by the prisoners, effectively freeing Erztal from the shackles of the war-torn empire.

The ensuing anarchy in Erztal ended when the original leaders of the riot, now donning the looted arms and armour of the murdered guards, began to organise themselves to safeguard their freedom. Swearing to never become slaves again or bow to any king or emperor, the Erztaler rebels formed a republic of equal men where officials are elected by the various mining and blacksmithing guilds which now control Erztal's commerce. The descendants of these rebellious prisoners pride themselves on their ignoble ancestry and are fiercely independent, each guild keeping jealous watch over their lucrative mines. The name of Erztal's capital, Altlager – "old camp", harkens back to the days when it was little more than a labour camp of tents, shacks, and the garrison's fort.
Last edited May 05, 2021 at 08:47PM EDT

olors64 wrote:

@Soup King which parts of the territory are the main and new islands located?

The main island is the one with two Hexagons and the new island is the one by itself.

Here's what I have so far:

How actions work for different types of nations:
- Centralized States get a maximum of 9 actions.
- Federations get a maximum of 5 actions for the central government, while its states get 2 actions each.
- Confederations, which for this game is any nation without a central government, get 3 actions for each member state.

Last edited May 06, 2021 at 02:08PM EDT

Erztal shall then be a confederation of three states.

The Erztaler Confederacy
Once the empire was driven out of Erztal's valleys, the communities of the Erztaler rebels organised themselves in three autonomous states centred around the major settlements of the region. Together they forged a confederacy to manage their common interests, facilitate trade, and defend their independence against any potential outside aggressors.

Altlager: The first of the two major labour camps that the empire established in Erztal and the starting point of the prisoner revolt. Due to its central location in the valleys and its symbolic importance as instigator of the rebellion the settlement quickly grew to a large city and became the main hub of Erztal.

Zeughausen: The oldest settlement in Erztal, which was already a city of the old empire when Altlager and Neulager were still prisoner camps. As such many of the locals consider themselves to be more "civilised" than the "uncouth southern bumpkins". It's famed for its skilled metalworkers; the eponymous Zeughaus being a complex of smithies of armouries which once supplied the imperial army. Nowadays they provide arms and armour to the Confederacy's militias or export them to other, friendly realms.

Neulager: In their search for ever more untapped ore deposits the imperial prospectors advanced southwards until arriving at the idyllic shores of the southern freshwater lake. Deeming it an ideal location for colonisation a second labour camp was established there. When word reached Neulager that the northern inmates revolted they quickly followed suit. Ever since they maintain a friendly rivalry with their older sibling Altlager, begrudging their leading position.

Almheim: A young and unremarkable town nestled in a remote valley of the western highlands, officially belonging to the state of Neulager. Once a village of herdsmen, this burgeoning town recently began to attract adventurous miners who reject the gentrification of the older towns and hope to strike it rich in Almheim's yet largely untouched mountains.
Last edited May 06, 2021 at 05:10PM EDT

olors64 wrote:

Here's what I have so far:

How actions work for different types of nations:
- Centralized States get a maximum of 9 actions.
- Federations get a maximum of 5 actions for the central government, while its states get 2 actions each.
- Confederations, which for this game is any nation without a central government, get 3 actions for each member state.

If I'm going to roleplay this properly, I'm going to have to take Centralized States, although I can see this gimping me quite severely if I make it to the late game.

How actions work:

Actions should explain how the goal is achieved. For example, writing "I invent gunpowder" won't do much. If you do something like "Seizing enemy cannons, we figure out how they work so we can use this technology," or another way depending on the context, the action will have a better chance of succeeding. Some actions might not succeed; if there is a level of uncertainty, I will roll to determine its success.
To conduct diplomacy with other nations, post in the thread. Diplomatic actions will not count towards the limit per turn; they are free.
When diplomacy fails, war begins. Most wars will only last one turn, so you're entire strategy should be included with the declaration. Make sure you also include what you want out of the war as well. While your nation is in a state of war, your issues will display your level of war exhaustion. If a war drags on for more turns, or you start another war a turn after the previous one ended, the war exhaustion will increase. War exhaustion will cause your nation to perform worse. Side effects may include economic turmoil, depopulation, and revolts (see "revolutions" for more information). War exhaustion affects nations differently depending on size, as a smaller nation likely does not have as many resources or manpower than a larger nation, which could handle high war exhaustion and even defeat without collapsing.

The differences of how actions work from nation to nation:

Unitary states are nations which only have a single government; although autonomy can be given to certain regions, they are not controlled by the player. Actions for centralized states are more flexible than normal, and can apply to the local and the national level.
Federations have a national government and states with their own governments. Actions on the federal level apply to the entire nation (war, diplomacy, international trade, etc), while states focus on more local issues (infrastructure, water supply, trade between states, etc).
Confederations are somewhere between an alliance and a federation. While an alliance is composed of independent states, and a federation can have a strong central government, a confederation has a government so weak that, when you send actions relating to the confederation as a whole, I'll count them as diplomatic actions, even if you send them privately. However, the member states' actions should be relevant to the goals of the meeting, in addition to local concerns. For example, if the confederation declared war, the state bordering the enemy can directly attack while other states can send manpower and supplies.

How different government types work:

Democracies include direct, representative, or other edge cases (see: oligarchies). These governments will tend to form political parties around certain issues. Public opinion is an important factor in determining the success of actions. If the public is positive towards your nation, then not only will actions have better chances of succeeding, but your people may contribute bonus actions which are not restricted by the usual limits. If public reception is negative, actions will have worse odds, and I will start rolling for revolts.
Oligarchies are characterized by power structures inaccessible to the majority of citizens, whether that be wealth, intelligence, age, military, or some other barrier. Like democracies, oligarchies can exhibit partisan behavior, but public opinion, while present, is usually irrelevant.
Autocracies are systems where the government has enough power to do whatever it wants within their borders, or one's borders, because they typically have a sole leader. This form of government is most unlikely to be partisan, and public opinion only matters under extreme circumstances.
Successful revolutions give your nation an opportunity to change its structure, and even culture, entirely. Democracies are most likely to have revolts, but they are far less risky than normal. As such, they are least likely to have a revolution, as citizens can typically find another way to protest. Autocracies can have revolts too, but it's unlikely for them to turn into revolution, as the government could simply suppress them before they go out of control. Oligarchies, while most likely to have a revolution, can put down revolts like autocracies, but may have to implement a few reforms here and there to maintain stability.
Anarchic nations can occur if a government collapses and nothing replaces it. Actions sent to the anarchy are treated more like suggestions, as the people will only respond to suggestions if it happens to align with what they want. Anarchy doesn't last very long, as an outside power could easily fill the power vacuum or the people begin forming more complex forms of organization that can no longer be considered anarchy, making your nation playable again.

Shares of Acuminatia (Acuminatia for short)
Oligarchic Federation

=History=
  • The ancient foundations of this civilization lead back to a legend of a merchant establishing a system of trade between an agricultural town, and a mining town of old. It was during a societal collapse leading to the disappearance of vital workers that the two towns realized that neither could specialize without the other. They pooled their land in the form of Shares to ensure that there would always be diversity in the available skilled specialists to produce resources, and to distribute those resources between Shares, or trade them for necessary goods, be it resources missing in local supplies, tools which can benefit the workers, or perhaps writings filling in the gaps of knowledge between regions.
  • Since then, mining traditions have fallen to the wayside to make room for the extensive agricultural competitions held between Shares. The Shareholders are devoted mostly to bragging about the production of staple foods in excess, at the expense of other aspects of the nation, and the fertility of the land they rely on. The Shares of Acuminatia have used the profits of their monocultured endeavors as a crutch, and as such rely greatly on trading with their neighbors for goods and services to maintain basic aspects of civilization, even to the extent that they primarily use Mercenaries to ward off outside threats, and to police issues within the Shares.

The Government is an Oligarchic Federation that operates as such:
=Shares of Acuminatia=

  • Land is owned formally by the entity that is the Government, dubbed Acuminatia, not any individuals within the nation.
  • The Government is operated by an Oligarchic Council pooled from the Citizen population.

=Shareholders=

  • Councilmembers are referred to as Shareholders, a life position tied to a specific region, or a Share, appointed via simple majority Council vote when a Shareholder dies, and is treated as above Citizenship.
  • A Shareholders basic duty is to ensure that their Share is profitable, secure, and able to recoup from disaster.
  • Shareholders create the Laws and Regulations of the Shares they hold, though they can bring up concerns regarding other Shares with the Council.

=Citizens=

  • Shareholders are responsible for establishing Citizen Contracts which endow individuals with a place to live, access to supplies and tools to do work outlined by the Contract, and Citizenship for the duration of the Contract.
  • Citizens are given the right to petition for specific Laws and Regulations regarding the Share they reside in, provided there is a super majority Citizen vote in favor of it.
  • A simple majority Citizen vote across all Shares can bring up an issue before the Shareholder Council for due discussion and review as to a reasonable solution.

=Contracts=

  • Contracts can be taken up by any individual regardless of birthplace, but there is a special privilege given to locals guaranteeing Shareholders will provide opportunities to maintain Citizen Contracts for life.
  • Citizens can create Helper Contracts with individuals from anywhere to ensure they have the necessary manpower to uphold Citizen Contracts, but Helper Contracts do not grant Citizenship.

Claims:

=Cities=

  • Cherri
  • Liamon
  • Vanyla
  • Zassaprila
  • Creem
  • Rutbere
Last edited May 08, 2021 at 05:31PM EDT

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

OK, another question: Are we strictly bound to only having our populations made up of humans, or can we have non-humans/superhumans/etc. with unique abilities form a notable amount of our nation's population?

What kind of abilities?

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Shapeshifting, increased physical resilience and a very hard and tough skin/exoskeleton, primarily.

They can have the last 2, but shapeshifting might be a bit much, depending on what you mean. If you mean changing into other persons or creatures its fine, but changing to, say, a liquid would not.

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Shapeshifting, increased physical resilience and a very hard and tough skin/exoskeleton, primarily.

Kaijin, I swear if you create a nation populated entirely by The Thing, I will take the next plane to California and start slapping people until I reach you.

olors64 wrote:

They can have the last 2, but shapeshifting might be a bit much, depending on what you mean. If you mean changing into other persons or creatures its fine, but changing to, say, a liquid would not.

Don't worry, they won't change states of matter and they aren't anything like The Thing from the 1982 Sci-Fi Body Horror by John Carpenter The Thing, Starring Kurt Russel, Kieth David, Wilford Brimley, Donald Moffat, David Clennon, T. K. Carter, Thomas G. Waites, Richard Dyshart, Charles Hallahan, Joel Polis and Peter Maloney.

Also, Soup King, if you're taking the next plane to California, you'll be slapping for a good many decades before you get anywhere near me.

Last edited May 09, 2021 at 03:04PM EDT

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Don't worry, they won't change states of matter and they aren't anything like The Thing from the 1982 Sci-Fi Body Horror by John Carpenter The Thing, Starring Kurt Russel, Kieth David, Wilford Brimley, Donald Moffat, David Clennon, T. K. Carter, Thomas G. Waites, Richard Dyshart, Charles Hallahan, Joel Polis and Peter Maloney.

Also, Soup King, if you're taking the next plane to California, you'll be slapping for a good many decades before you get anywhere near me.

Aha, but you've forgotten the old Anglo Mind trick.

Just like the priest in Age of Empires, every American that an Englishman slaps hard enough will become converted and begin slapping other Americans, repeating the process.

Eventually we will reach critical mass and a raging Happy Slap storm will burn across the entirety of Norf 'Murika.

By my calculations, to reach you, I'll just need to do it once, and it'll take 5 mins.

You should have worn your Tin Foil Hat Mudda Dukka!

(Taps on the window nearest to you.)

Soup King wrote:

Aha, but you've forgotten the old Anglo Mind trick.

Just like the priest in Age of Empires, every American that an Englishman slaps hard enough will become converted and begin slapping other Americans, repeating the process.

Eventually we will reach critical mass and a raging Happy Slap storm will burn across the entirety of Norf 'Murika.

By my calculations, to reach you, I'll just need to do it once, and it'll take 5 mins.

You should have worn your Tin Foil Hat Mudda Dukka!

(Taps on the window nearest to you.)

Ah! But you have made an error in your plans! The slap only works on Canadians, Australians, New Zealanders and Falkland Islanders! Americans are immune to the slap, hence why we won the Revolutionary War and the War of 1812!

And bold of you to assume I live near a window! Or that I'm not wearing a tin foil hat right now!

Although, another serious question that feels really obvious, but I'm going to ask anyways: The map is a 2D representation of a spherical planet, correct? Therefor, if I'm on one end of the map, moving over the edge of the map would just loop me onto the opposite side, as in real-life? (e.g. If I move East from K-13, I would end up on K-1, right?)

Seeing that Kaijin's folks and the Ghorites feature fantastical creatures, I might withdraw Erztal and make a less mundane nation as well, depending on how much fantasy Olors wants to have in this game.

If Olors is down with fantasy nations, I'd like to reserve the corner marked in beige in the southeastern desert for my potential new nation.

Nigel the treasure hunter wrote:

Seeing that Kaijin's folks and the Ghorites feature fantastical creatures, I might withdraw Erztal and make a less mundane nation as well, depending on how much fantasy Olors wants to have in this game.

If Olors is down with fantasy nations, I'd like to reserve the corner marked in beige in the southeastern desert for my potential new nation.

The Ghorites have nothing supernatural ATM. The sea serpents are beefed-up lampreys and the cutænas are just Permian-era reptiles.

Last edited May 10, 2021 at 09:18PM EDT

Thinking about it more, and I don’t think supernatural beings is within the scope of what I was planning for, at least not this early in the game.

This will be a semi-realistic game, meaning there are just humans, as well as the familiar flora and fauna, inhabiting the world.

This may change later, hence the semi, but that’s what it will be at first

Last edited May 10, 2021 at 09:35PM EDT

Nigel the treasure hunter wrote:

Seeing that Kaijin's folks and the Ghorites feature fantastical creatures, I might withdraw Erztal and make a less mundane nation as well, depending on how much fantasy Olors wants to have in this game.

If Olors is down with fantasy nations, I'd like to reserve the corner marked in beige in the southeastern desert for my potential new nation.

Dag-nab it! I was going to put mine there.

Right while I was in the middle of drawing the terrain map, too.

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Dag-nab it! I was going to put mine there.

Right while I was in the middle of drawing the terrain map, too.

Humans only, no supernatural beings? Nevermind then, the desert is yours my friend.

Keep your sand and droughts, we Erztaler prefer the lush green of our valleys and the cool, azure water of our lake anyway.

Nigel the treasure hunter wrote:

Humans only, no supernatural beings? Nevermind then, the desert is yours my friend.

Keep your sand and droughts, we Erztaler prefer the lush green of our valleys and the cool, azure water of our lake anyway.

"Humans only, no supernatural beings?"

Then what's the point of having a weirdo pseudo-theocratic quasi-Randian libertarian republic/off-brand 40K faction-military police state-hybrid if their weirdo religion doesn't do anything besides make some of them wear goofy robes?

Anyways, here I go.

Official Name: Kylfurt Empire
Government Type: Pseudo-Theocratic Quasi-Randian Libertarian Republic/Off-Brand 40K Faction-Military Police State-Hybrid (Not even I know what that is supposed to mean, let alone how it's supposed to work.)
History: A land of warriors, artisans and polymaths, The Kylfurt Empire prides itself on it's independence, technological advancement, military might and high amounts of individual freedoms it's citizenry enjoys. The exclusive home of the mysterious species of metallic shapeshifting giants known as "The Undefinable," it amasses as many of them as it can to bolster it's strength. It's Eastern half is protected by a great wall built into the mountain range stretching the entire length of the nation, many have tried to breach it's gates and every one of it's challengers merely became another addition to the nightmarish display of fallen enemies strewn along the walls to deter invaders. Governed by it's Commander-In-Chief, National Congress and Senate, it aims to spread it's ways of individualism and liberty to the world beyond it's borders and crush anything opposed to their fundamental beliefs, leaving a trail of total destruction and desolation if necessary. The official national religion is The Church of Shirley, but fellowship is not compulsory and there are no consequences for not being a member.

If 8 players join, I will finish making the map, meaning future players will be unable to edit the map. The maximum size of their claims will be 2 tiles instead of 3.

To avoid clutter, forts will be unlabeled.

There are two players using the color red. They should be different to avoid confusion for when I add the nations' territories.

The map so far:

@The Entire Cringeworthy Gallery
Please post your nation's info in the thread. It has to be big enough to fit in one post.

@Kommando Kaijin
Due to recent changes, the metallic shapeshifting species will be mythological.

Last edited May 11, 2021 at 12:43PM EDT

Hartü-Ghor
Democratic Monarchy

Current Year
175 GD
History
The people of Hartü-Ghor, or Ghorites, are a hardy people known for their vodka, skill with axes, and bizarre local wildlife. They were originally a society of hunter-gatherers in the south who migrated north,
where harsh winters forced them to search for other means of sustenance. After many years of trial and error, during which the Ghorites nearly died out, oats were eventually discovered by the Turînn clan around 1 GD. They later
encountered the Rastüvyy clan, who had lived off of smoked fish. The Rastüvyy were firm believers in the policy of "kill first, ask questions later," which quickly escalated into the Seaside War (17 GD--21 GD), which ended with no
clear victor. In 34 GD, the Turînn attempted to make peace with the Rastüvyy. The endeavor failed, and the Rastüvyy instead decided to go to war with the Turînn again (The War of Rastüvyy Conquest, 35 GD--36 GD). Despite a truly impressive performance from the Turînn, the Rastüvyy emerged victorious, conquering the Turînn and their city-state of Hár-Bênnān. The incorporation of Turînn technology and culture lead to a massive boom in scientific advancement and art (The Renaissance, 37 GD--58 GD). The Renaissance ended in567 GD, when the Hartü clan attacked the Rastüvyy capital city, Cärmûl. This lead to a fierce battle (The Second Battle of Cärmûl, 58 GD), however Rastüvyy diplomats managed to nip the conflict in the bud by means of betrothing Princess Dâbebe Rastüvyy to Prince Chäd Hartü IV, forming the Hartü-Rastüvyy clan (changed to Hartü-Ghor in 85 GD).
Timeline
<2 GD: Age of Ice

~90 GD: The clans migrate north
~70 GD: The Hartü clan begins domesticating cutænas and growing wheat
~40 GD: The Rastüvyy clan begins taming sea serpents
~1 GD: The Turînn clan begins growing oats

2 GD--17 GD: Prewar period
~10 GD: The Rastüvyy clan discovers glassblowing
10 GD: An unnamed Turînn farmer invents the wheel

17 GD--21 GD: The Seaside War
17 GD: The First Battle of Cärmûl (Rastüvyy victory)
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The Battle of Yblayoa (Turînn pyrrhic victory)
18 GD: The Battle of Spotäma (Turînn victory)
18--20 GD: The Two Years' Battle (Rastüvyy victory)
21 GD: The Battle of Hydonmaa (Turînn victory)

21 GD--35 GD: Interwar period
22 GD: King Chäd II of the Hartü clan instates a council of six government officials to check the king's power
29 GD: The Rastüvyy clan begins fermenting maple sap into vodka
34 GD: The Turînn clan makes an offer of peace with the Rastüvyy, which ends up making the latter decide to conquer the former once and for all

35 GD--36 GD: The War of Rastüvyy Conquest
35 GD: The Arboreal Offensive (unclear victory)
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The First Battle of Hár-Bênnān (Turînn victory)
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The Battle of Hama'yva (Rastüvyy victory)
36 GD: Rastüvyy military engineer develops bottled fireballs (i.e. Molotov cocktails)
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The Battle of Hurn (devastating Rastüvyy victory). Bottled fireballs used to great extant
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The Second Battle of Hár-Bênnān (Rastüvyy victory)

37 GD--58 GD: Renaissance period
39 GD: Silver discovered in Yblayoa
39 GD--42 GD: Silver rush
44 GD: Hama Turînn outlines plans for an early steam engine
58 GD: Second Battle of Cärmûl (Rastüvyy victory)

58 GD--70 GD: Post-unification period
59 GD: Princess Dâbebe and Prince Chäd marry
61 GD: Prince Chäd Hartü-Rasüvyy V is born
65 GD: Princess Amø-Gùs Hartü-Rastüvyy is born

70 GD--175 GD: ???
idk

Wildlife
Sea Serpents: A massive species of jawless fish, originally domesticated by the Rastüvyy clan, and used in lieu of boats.
Cutænas: A bearlike species of mammal-like reptile, used as a housepet and guard animal by the Hartü clan.

Government
The King makes decisions that are approved by a council consisting of two representatives for each town (so six total).

MORE WILL BE ADDED LATER

Last edited May 11, 2021 at 12:44PM EDT

olors64 wrote:

If 8 players join, I will finish making the map, meaning future players will be unable to edit the map. The maximum size of their claims will be 2 tiles instead of 3.

To avoid clutter, forts will be unlabeled.

There are two players using the color red. They should be different to avoid confusion for when I add the nations' territories.

The map so far:

@The Entire Cringeworthy Gallery
Please post your nation's info in the thread. It has to be big enough to fit in one post.

@Kommando Kaijin
Due to recent changes, the metallic shapeshifting species will be mythological.

Gahd dang it Olors, I didn't just come up with all that just so you can go "Ah, nevehmind!"

Also, just to make sure nobody's confused because I forgot to label what the terrain colors meant, Dark Green is swamp (hence MIRE-grove,) light blue is ice/tundra (hence Whitehel=White Hell) and the dark grey spot where Ft. Praedolore is located is supposed to be a volcanic area.

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Gahd dang it Olors, I didn't just come up with all that just so you can go "Ah, nevehmind!"

Also, just to make sure nobody's confused because I forgot to label what the terrain colors meant, Dark Green is swamp (hence MIRE-grove,) light blue is ice/tundra (hence Whitehel=White Hell) and the dark grey spot where Ft. Praedolore is located is supposed to be a volcanic area.

I feel like the meta-game is going to be keeping you from advancing to the Sci-Fi age so you can't have genetically engineered slop girls.

@Olors: I really appreciate you keeping my territory brown in the over-all map so far.

Considering my land is almost made entirely out of turds, I find this very fitting.

Soup King wrote:

I feel like the meta-game is going to be keeping you from advancing to the Sci-Fi age so you can't have genetically engineered slop girls.

@Olors: I really appreciate you keeping my territory brown in the over-all map so far.

Considering my land is almost made entirely out of turds, I find this very fitting.

Hey, I said I was doing metallic shapeshifters. I'm honestly just going to stick with them and probably not bring too much in the way of waifus into the fray.

Also, do you mean that your landmass is mostly made of feces, meaning that it's highly flammable?

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Hey, I said I was doing metallic shapeshifters. I'm honestly just going to stick with them and probably not bring too much in the way of waifus into the fray.

Also, do you mean that your landmass is mostly made of feces, meaning that it's highly flammable?

It's fine, the tides keep most of it nice and damp.

Since it's only the dried out stuff that's flammable, I'm generally alright since it's pretty much just broken down into soil and stone for the larger parts.

This is the price you have to accept for terraforming in a middle age low-fantasy kingdom.

If you're born there, then you don't notice the smell and we have lovely fertile ground for growing beans and prunes in order to keep up home-grown production of building materials whilst we await for the next delivery from all of the other nations.

I'm generally surprised that it's taken this long for people to realise what I've done, despite all of the names being fecal references and me deliberately choosing territory that looked like a turd which I then painted brown.

I guess I'm the only one reading the country bios. ¯\(ツ)

Soup King wrote:

It's fine, the tides keep most of it nice and damp.

Since it's only the dried out stuff that's flammable, I'm generally alright since it's pretty much just broken down into soil and stone for the larger parts.

This is the price you have to accept for terraforming in a middle age low-fantasy kingdom.

If you're born there, then you don't notice the smell and we have lovely fertile ground for growing beans and prunes in order to keep up home-grown production of building materials whilst we await for the next delivery from all of the other nations.

I'm generally surprised that it's taken this long for people to realise what I've done, despite all of the names being fecal references and me deliberately choosing territory that looked like a turd which I then painted brown.

I guess I'm the only one reading the country bios. ¯\(ツ)

So you're saying… all I'd have to do to beat your country is just build a giant toilet around both islands and flush it?

Hey, I might not even have to resort to spamming The Undefinable to win this!

Soup King wrote:

It's fine, the tides keep most of it nice and damp.

Since it's only the dried out stuff that's flammable, I'm generally alright since it's pretty much just broken down into soil and stone for the larger parts.

This is the price you have to accept for terraforming in a middle age low-fantasy kingdom.

If you're born there, then you don't notice the smell and we have lovely fertile ground for growing beans and prunes in order to keep up home-grown production of building materials whilst we await for the next delivery from all of the other nations.

I'm generally surprised that it's taken this long for people to realise what I've done, despite all of the names being fecal references and me deliberately choosing territory that looked like a turd which I then painted brown.

I guess I'm the only one reading the country bios. ¯\(ツ)

Don't worry, every country bio is being read, thoroughly.

Nigel the treasure hunter wrote:

"Let us hope zhat zhose kotländer Kackköpfe stay on zheir smelly island… pfui, zhat stench!"

"Und if you vant ze stench to stay avay, you'd have best keep paying us Erztalander!"

"Ve both know your auld Minen Schafts kanst only hold zo much."

Last edited May 14, 2021 at 06:35PM EDT

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

So you're saying… all I'd have to do to beat your country is just build a giant toilet around both islands and flush it?

Hey, I might not even have to resort to spamming The Undefinable to win this!

Considering that The Church of Shirley is the state religion, this technically makes it part of our shared shitposting universe.

Because of that, that is an entirely logical and acceptable outcome.

The only question is, is will your nation progress that far when a robot and a purple-robed masked scientist sporadically manifest in the land, get into a slapping fight whilst a group of futuristic and highly magical ladies assault any living creature in the nearby vicinity; leading to havoc, destruction and the guaranteed death of a solitary squirrel every time?

Soup King wrote:

"Und if you vant ze stench to stay avay, you'd have best keep paying us Erztalander!"

"Ve both know your auld Minen Schafts kanst only hold zo much."

"Ja freilich, you can take our dung to zhat Misthaufen of an island zhat you call your Heimat. Vell, ve vould say zhat if ve'd have a harbour for your smelly ships to dock at. Ve might see to zhat in zhe future. Until zhen just stay clear of our coasts."

Soup King wrote:

Considering that The Church of Shirley is the state religion, this technically makes it part of our shared shitposting universe.

Because of that, that is an entirely logical and acceptable outcome.

The only question is, is will your nation progress that far when a robot and a purple-robed masked scientist sporadically manifest in the land, get into a slapping fight whilst a group of futuristic and highly magical ladies assault any living creature in the nearby vicinity; leading to havoc, destruction and the guaranteed death of a solitary squirrel every time?

You'd be surprised at how much I'm planning.

Also, how do you know that I don't just plan on shoving a bunch of Undefinable into a blender together until I eventually have one island-sized Undefinable and send it to burrow under your island and shapeshift into the aforementioned giant toilet when you least expect it.

Also, who's the purple robed masked scientist? I don't remember him from anywhere. Although the futuristic ladies thing does make me think of another OC I could throw into the maelstrom of battle…

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

You'd be surprised at how much I'm planning.

Also, how do you know that I don't just plan on shoving a bunch of Undefinable into a blender together until I eventually have one island-sized Undefinable and send it to burrow under your island and shapeshift into the aforementioned giant toilet when you least expect it.

Also, who's the purple robed masked scientist? I don't remember him from anywhere. Although the futuristic ladies thing does make me think of another OC I could throw into the maelstrom of battle…

This one, you silly sausage you.



Huh, planning.

What will you do when my elite sewer snakes strike down your leaders during their morning toilet break whilst I drop incendiary baboons from the sky?

I don't know how to plan for that, so how can you possibly plan against it?

Soup King wrote:

This one, you silly sausage you.



Huh, planning.

What will you do when my elite sewer snakes strike down your leaders during their morning toilet break whilst I drop incendiary baboons from the sky?

I don't know how to plan for that, so how can you possibly plan against it?

My self-Insert OC isn't a scientist, he's a dude in body armor and a gas mask. I mean, there is the idea for a comic I have where he's in charge of The MacMadeth twins, Smithson, Dixon and sometimes J, if you remember them from the other RP threads, and leads them as a team of elite assassins who kill enemy commanders, demolish infrastructure and all sorts of covert operations via excessive automatic weapons fire and VX gas… and Jenna MacMadeth basically being a busty ginger redneck Khornate Berserker who refuses to just shoot the enemy like a normal person and absolutely insists that running up to the enemy, plunging her hand into their neck and ripping out their esophagus while slobbering and gibbering like a savage animal is the proper way to dispatch a machine gun nest… and a sniper… and a tank… and enemy air support…

…Also, Sharla Estelleton, Shirley's older sister, is their V-22 pilot…

…Because who doesn't want to watch a bunch of young uncouth Southern gals blast, beat and fumigate their way through World War III to stop a bunch of Albino genetically engineered dictators? Ywo of whom you should already be slightly familiar with.

But as to your sewer snakes and incendiary baboons, with The Church of Shirley being the Official religion, the entire land has been blessed by Immundusia. The sewers are so contaminated with radioactive waste and toxic chemicals that the Snakes would die of acute leukemia and brain tumors immediately upon entering them and the smog is so thick that the Baboons would also immediately develop Lung Cancer and harmlessly splatter on the ground, having succumbed to their carcinomas long before the could ignite.

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

My self-Insert OC isn't a scientist, he's a dude in body armor and a gas mask. I mean, there is the idea for a comic I have where he's in charge of The MacMadeth twins, Smithson, Dixon and sometimes J, if you remember them from the other RP threads, and leads them as a team of elite assassins who kill enemy commanders, demolish infrastructure and all sorts of covert operations via excessive automatic weapons fire and VX gas… and Jenna MacMadeth basically being a busty ginger redneck Khornate Berserker who refuses to just shoot the enemy like a normal person and absolutely insists that running up to the enemy, plunging her hand into their neck and ripping out their esophagus while slobbering and gibbering like a savage animal is the proper way to dispatch a machine gun nest… and a sniper… and a tank… and enemy air support…

…Also, Sharla Estelleton, Shirley's older sister, is their V-22 pilot…

…Because who doesn't want to watch a bunch of young uncouth Southern gals blast, beat and fumigate their way through World War III to stop a bunch of Albino genetically engineered dictators? Ywo of whom you should already be slightly familiar with.

But as to your sewer snakes and incendiary baboons, with The Church of Shirley being the Official religion, the entire land has been blessed by Immundusia. The sewers are so contaminated with radioactive waste and toxic chemicals that the Snakes would die of acute leukemia and brain tumors immediately upon entering them and the smog is so thick that the Baboons would also immediately develop Lung Cancer and harmlessly splatter on the ground, having succumbed to their carcinomas long before the could ignite.

Oh, I see this is Kaijin A, the Space Commander and not Kaijin B the Frenemy that lives next door.

Meaning that only one of them is ready and prepared for a spontaneous mechanical happy-slapping.

Got it.

Anyway, it's bold of you to assume that the baboons wouldn't already be on fire when they left the plane.

It's also bold to assume that at this level of technological advancement that the snakes, bred on a millenia old cesspit, wouldn't have built up a natural resistance to such hazardous waste or wouldn't be given Kawaii power armour with friggin' laser beams strapped their heads.

Last edited May 15, 2021 at 07:17AM EDT

Soup King wrote:

Oh, I see this is Kaijin A, the Space Commander and not Kaijin B the Frenemy that lives next door.

Meaning that only one of them is ready and prepared for a spontaneous mechanical happy-slapping.

Got it.

Anyway, it's bold of you to assume that the baboons wouldn't already be on fire when they left the plane.

It's also bold to assume that at this level of technological advancement that the snakes, bred on a millenia old cesspit, wouldn't have built up a natural resistance to such hazardous waste or wouldn't be given Kawaii power armour with friggin' laser beams strapped their heads.

Space commander? What does any of that have to do with Outer Space?

It's also bold to assume that there aren't sick, perverted snake-fetishists in the sewers, I mean, where else are we going to exile the backwards, insane degenerates of our society to? We can't just let them walk around in broad daylight, somebody might see them and become mentally scarred by their depravity. Do you really want your snakes to be exposed to that sort of stuff?

Kommando_Kaijin wrote:

Space commander? What does any of that have to do with Outer Space?

It's also bold to assume that there aren't sick, perverted snake-fetishists in the sewers, I mean, where else are we going to exile the backwards, insane degenerates of our society to? We can't just let them walk around in broad daylight, somebody might see them and become mentally scarred by their depravity. Do you really want your snakes to be exposed to that sort of stuff?

Well, they do have lasers strapped to their friggin' heads, so they should be fine.

Anyway, it is bold of us to assume that I will even have access to snakes and that both of us will be able to afford such things after falling into an Acuminatian Debt Trap when we needed money to finance our armies to fend off the Erztalen-Hartü-Ghorian hordes at our gates.

> Erztalen-Hartü-Ghorian hordes

sips beer "Ve Erztaler are not a varlike people, ve vould never just invade anozher country…"

flash forward to goose-stepping soldiers saluting a moustached man delivering a choleric rant about Erztal's superiority

"… vhy schould ve? Ve've got our mountains, our valleys, our Bier and sausages, vhat more could ve vant?" empties his mug, burps, and toddles off

Last edited May 15, 2021 at 06:07PM EDT

Oh, since I'll probably take a shot at illustrating scenes from the campaign in my standard hap-hazard fashion, Hetalia Style; does anyone have any preferences for their country's avatar?

Skeletor-sm

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