Hello there! I am my daughter’s mother, and she convinced me to join this website! At first I was wary about this, as my daughter is a bit of a shut-in, but after some convincing, she finally managed to log in me! I'm also here for my daughter's safety.
Now, I know that this is a Christian website, but after looking at some of the users, my goodness! It was shocking! I mean, I looked at the Pokemon “gallery” and why is there a half-exposed breast in there!? My lord, Pokemon is a game for kids! Not for masturbation!
Now, I was initially horrified by my discovery, but after some talking, my daughter told me that the gallery was being hacked and “spammed” by disgusting Internet “trolls”. My word! You young people have some interesting vocabulary, like “cheeky” and “memes”.
However, after looking at some of the “friends” my daughter has, I am VERY concerned, and therefore, I have made a list of the problems I am experiencing with some of the users of this site.
Firstly, Muffinlicious, what an interesting name! Unfortunately, you are a bit too gay, so we need to do something about that, young man. Random Man, my daughter has told me you have made unwanted sexual advances towards her. Stop that or, forgive my soul, I will find you and get you into prison.
Loli, you’re a young man who is interested in young female child porn. I have alerted the police. There is no hope for you. Twisty, I hear you listen to satanic rap music. For the love of your soul, my child, we need you to listen to some holistic Toby Mac.
Sam, I hear you’re a transgender male who identifies as female. I can’t offer you any support but to turn to the light and ask God for forgiveness. Same for your “wife” (who is apparently also a transgender) , Natsuru.
Blue Screen of Death, I see you’re a homosexual atheist. I believe in due time, you will stop being a faggot and become like what I hope Sam will become!
Sir-Soundwave, I hear you’re a (what my daughter calls it, which is a very colorful word) “robot-lover”, and I hope you at least use protection.
Stevie Wonder, I see you’re also on this website! I am a big fan of you, Mr. Wonder, and I hope I can get an autographed note!
Eurofighter Typhoon, you’re a normal human being with good opinions, keep up the Christian work!
Captain Blubber, I hear you’re an overweight drunkard who needs Christ. Please contact me for assistance.
And last, but certainly not least, No Original Names (A.K.A Squigly’s Husbando), I’ve heard you’re into necrophilia. That is a dark and evil path you go down, and I fear the worst for your soul.
Thank you for reading and god bless!
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