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D Anon is an arsonist Anonymous 19/04/02(Tue)21:46 No. 3421 [Reply] File 155423436523.jpg - (144.36KB , 1000x847, VZGYWFO.jpg) >be me >working at chick-fil-a >doing a promo where you get a free entree or a meal for looking like a cow (costume-meal, tshirt=Dentree) >been super busy >tired as f--- >finaly it cools down a bit >landwhale and her daughter come up, they order 2 #1meals and diet(offcourse) cocke >give it to them for free >confusion.mp4 >say we "are doing a promo" and point to the sign >they walk away hàppy, oblivious to the fourth degree burn that just went down >mfw

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext ecoregion jaw organism terrestrial plant font

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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Resolution: (720px x 1173px)

File size: 155 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon hates fat people | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)22:22:33 No.62367736 >Getting increasingly angry at my fat sister for being fat. >Resent having to sit next to her at things like theaters. >Was subtle for years but now 9 KB JPG telling her she needs to improve her ability to bend down to get things so she can stop crying at me to do it every day or telling her she needs to make sure she can fit in a plane seat when we go on family trips. >Repulsed by her three chins, can't remember the last time I hugged her outside of a funeral. >Hate the fat slur in her voice and her breathing struggles while watching Tv. I should feel like a a------ but I don't.

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Not a greentext, but still a story. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/19/16(Sat)20:57:24 No.712259330 Walking home today some f----- bumped into me and instantly started talking s--- about aluminum being the best metal. I tried to remain calm and explain to him that iron was actually the best metal, but he wouldn't take a hint. He started throwing around words like "rust" and I lost it. Punched him right in his aluminum- 11 KB JPG loving f--- face. I hate aluminum so goddamn much.

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anon is not so different | /r/Greentext

>in my room >dad yelling at me because abusive >calls me a retard >autism kicks in >"takes one to know one" 143 KB PNG he's throwing bottles at me now what do i do

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OP doesn't like cooking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)15:29:20 No.15636937 >the fish you're about to cook picks its head up from the counter, says your name, and begs not to be cooked 44 KB PNG

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Anon is a redditor | /r/Greentext

File: pgYSqgC. jpg (29 KB, 557x317) O Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)11:50:26 No.848006549 [Reply] >>848006596 i haven't had sex in nearly a year Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)11:51:27 No.848006596 >>848006549 (OP) i haven't had sex

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Anons physics teacher is an old drunk | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)23:49:40 No.848046219 > high school > physics teacher is an old drunk. He looked like redneck Robert De Niro on crack > during class, my friend says that je does not want to have kids. > I dont remember why he said it, but he was reacting to something, that the teacher have said > teacher gets up > slowly walkes to my friend > he took out of his pocket opening knife > puts it in front of the friend > "cut your balls off" > "wha-what?" (friend was around 15) > "you don't want kids, you don't need balls" > "I'm waiting" > he stood there for about three minutes. Then took the knife, wallked back and continued with the lesson He drunk himself to death year later

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Anon watches a documentary | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/12(Wed)18:06:49 No. 2903512 >13 years old, have had boners many many times before, just not know what the point was >In my room secretly watching documentary about danish strippers >Have r-----------, I'm just staring at it and raging thinking "what the f--- is the point.." >Decided to continue watching another ten minutes of the documentary >R----------- still annoying the hell out of me, decide to grab it really hard and maybe "choke" it to sleep >Feels kinda good, wat is this!? >Start experimenting with different motions, feels better and better >HHHHHNNNNNNNGGGGG >What the f--- just happened >Get scared shitless, thinking this is not normal. >Quickly turn off TV, go to bed, terrified that I broke my d--- somehow. >Didn't jack it for another week just to be sure that everything was ok.

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Anon's friend needs to be potty trained | /r/Greentext

File: plstp.jpg (14 KB, 312x245) "that guy" stories Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)13:10:45 No.62444259 [Reply] ► >>62444303 >>62444882 This was a decade ago but it still haunts me >be me, 19, uni student >visit friend in his new apartment >he's also 19, just moved out his parents' place >play vidya with him >have to take a s---, use his bathroom >can't find tp >m----------- used it up and didn't replace the roll >f------ children living on their own for the first time >luckily got some tissues with me, use those >get back to vidya >"yo mate, you ran out of tp" >"nah I don't need any" >"what do you mean you don't need any?" >"I just flush without looking." >awkward pause >.. >.. >WHAT?! >m----------- thought tp was just there to cover your s--- so you don't have to look at it while you flush >says he never looks back at his s---, that's weird >says he saves money >my f------ face when

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Anon is a gamer | /r/Greentext

File: pepegamer.jpg (138 KB, 880x793) Anonymous 02/22/21(Mon)21:29:29 No.848027878 >be me >gaming alone in room with two friends who are together >they start making out >mind my own business and concentrate on my game >all of a sudden start f------ like rabbits >still concentrated on my game >mfw I start rethinking my life decisions

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anon gets a girlfriend | /r/Greentext

File: 212333.png (60 KB, 500x751) O Anonymous 02/04/19(Mon)06:43:07 No.50789300 (F Anon, what is your most cringe/embarrassing story? The s >be me >11 year old latchkey kid >always f------ horny >rub my d--- on everything in the house >eventually stick d--- into leather couch cushions >feelsgood.jpg >c-- all over cushions, clean with wet rag >do this afterschool everyday for a month >couch is basically first girlfriend >birthday comes around on a weekday >get home and start undressing >kneel in front of her and rub her cushions >happybirthdaytome >spit on my d--- and start pounding sad birthday pepe >push down on cushions for more pressure >start to c-- when parents burst in with gifts >stare at each other as I'm finishing >mom starts crying, dad starts yelling >frozen in fear, faint like a bitch >wake up in my bed, dad carried me >new ps2 and cake on nightstand >cry all night >next morning, it never happened >parents have literally never brought it up again >its been 18 years >dad buys new couch this weekend for living room >dad and I carry it into the living room >put it down, he thanks me and starts heading upstairs >iay on new couch to watch tv >dad turns around and looks at me >"try to be gentle with this one" >fingerguns.gif >mfw

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Can't believe he would say that in front of Steve | /r/Greentext

family feud time bois Anonymous 07/30/19(Tue)20:52:26 No.118860471 >>118860921 >Steve Harvey: "We asked 100 people, what is the male reproductive organ?" >Contestant: "The penis" >SH: "A WUH... HUH??" >audience erupts into laughter >Steve Harvey grabs onto podium to support himself >laughter gets even louder >SH: "O lordy.." >one man goes into cardiac arrest and many others begin vomiting profusely from laughing too hard >SH: "YOU PEOPLE NEED HELP" >the Earth shatters and Satan rises from the underworld to claim unworthy souls >the universe begins rapidly closing in on itself >SH: (putting on a weary voice) "Survey says..." >the board shows 100 for "penis" >Harvey is able to get off one more shocked look before existence as we know it comes to an end

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Anon is an entrepreneur | /r/Greentext

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Greentext Stories - Anon works at chick fil a | /r/Greentext

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D Anon is an arsonist Anonymous 19/04/02(Tue)21:46 No. 3421 [Reply] File 155423436523.jpg - (144.36KB , 1000x847, VZGYWFO.jpg) >be me >working at chick-fil-a >doing a promo where you get a free entree or a meal for looking like a cow (costume-meal, tshirt=Dentree) >been super busy >tired as f--- >finaly it cools down a bit >landwhale and her daughter come up, they order 2 #1meals and diet(offcourse) cocke >give it to them for free >confusion.mp4 >say we "are doing a promo" and point to the sign >they walk away hàppy, oblivious to the fourth degree burn that just went down >mfw

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