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File: mourning.jpg (67 KB, 953x960) 伊 >wonder what happened to him >look up "yemen june 28 2019" Anonymous 06/23/22(Thu)00:11:05 No.880619305 >>880619627 >>880619787 >>880620378 >be me >stupid 16 year old gamer incel >have a friend online >hes this yemeni chad kid >the kid is like 12 and already decently funny >we play CS:GO together alot >his accent is funny but he actually f------ kicks ass >he says he lives in ta'is or something unpronounceable like that >one night >june 27, 2019 >he says hes logging off, and he'll see me tommorow >last logged in 8 hours ago >last logged in one day ago >last logged in two weeks ago >last logged in two years ago >"US manufactured bomb used on deadly air strike on civilians" >some bomb hit his f------ house and killed him >damn. >the kid prob wanted to play more CS:GO in the morning, never woke up to get the chance >still hurts a bit

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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ANON FINDS DEATH NOTE | /r/Greentext

deathnote.jpg, 28KiB, 333x499 /r9k/ Deathnote Anonymous Sun 17 Apr 2022 15:58:03 No.68259102 View >be you >find deathnote >what do? DEATH NOTE >be me >find deathnote >start by deleting various powerful politicians, just to show the world my power is real >hold all government leaders and CEOs hostage >must do what I say or you get deleted >force various countries to enact laws or make amendments that conform to my will >women subservient to men again >stop mass migration >purge degeneracy of all kinds >establish the Siberian Exclusion Zone >all who resist receive a one way ticket to Siberia >use Siberian gulag chattel to produce raw materials for NEETS, like tendies and videogames >NEET underclass inherits the world

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Anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

1 40867114 28/03/2017 6:05 PM >go to gold's >doing my warmup routine of curls and butterflys >entrance swings open >a literal f------ clown walks in >like not even some juggalo or joker cosplayer, an actual clown that you'd see at a carnival >he checks in and goes to the freeweight section >picks up two 20 pound dumbbells and starts f------ juggling them 142 KB >everyone stares in awe >one of the employees asks him to please stop because he could hurt someone >agrees and drops one on his foot, starts screaming in a high pitched voice >employee asks if he's ok >he lets out a chuckle, honks his nose and takes off hos size 19 shoe to reveal he's fine >employee sighs and tries to find the manager >by the time she comes back the clown is on the squat rack doing 3pl8 ATF reps >he notices her and the manager out of the corner of his eye and smiles >his pants conveniently rip and he s---- out three hackey sacks and a circus peanut i f------ hate these gym clowns i wish they would just go away

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Anon finds out about 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/23/19(Fri)08:26:22 No.807817159 >hear that 4chan is filled with elite hackers >open browser and go to 4chan >my laptop camera scans my retina >"permission granted" >holy mackerel these guys are elite! >I get a message on my phone from an unknown number 381 KB JPG >"put all your fingers on the trackpad" >I put my fingers on the trackpad and my fingerprints are burned off >holy f--- >mfw they initiate me into their anti-establishment hacker group >mfw we're going to flip society on their head >lol just kidding >they're just a bunch of retards

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Anon won his freedom | /r/Greentext

0907339847280 12/29/20 (Tue)00:59:41 No.61591858 >be me >be fapping day and night >stupid mom keeps not knocking on the door and just barging in >hadn't gotten caught yet, but I had some close calls PEPE TZU. THE ART OF WAR 85 KB JPG >hatch a plan >decide to sit naked in my room all day so she'll be embarrassed next time it happens >all day I'm sitting in my chair >it happened >she ALWAYS knocks now Sometimes you gotta lose the battle to win the war

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Anon Saves Himself From Trouble | /r/Greentext

Share the most retarded thing you've ever done. I'll go first. >be me >23 days ago >driving drunk as f---, run a red light, ram into a f------ cop car at 20 mph >cars are not too damaged >drunk mind is scared as s--- >unable to think of a reason, stab myself with my pocket knife before the cop comes over >hide knife in glove box >say, "I had been stabbed officer" >cop gives me a ride to the nearest hospital mfw crisis avoided 138 KB PNG

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A simple, yet effective message | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/22/22(Wed)05:04:19 No.880605952 69 Replies / 7 Images 256.png 165 KB PNG Being an adult f------ blows. View Thread

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Anon rewrites a classic to appeal to the youngsters. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/09/22(Thu)10:06:17 No.169343560 fr.png 1.33 MB PNG >Big yikes! TF is that, Private Pyle? A jelly donut xir! >Deadass? Im shook! Xir yes xir! >Are you allowed to slay jelly donuts Private Pyle? Xir no Xir! >And why not? Because im a thicc bitch xir! >Because you are a hecking chonker, Private Pyle! Xir yes xir! >Private Pyle has been acting mad sus no cap fr, I have tried to help they/them, but I have failed ong. From now, whenever they/them f--- up, I will not punish they/them, I will punish all of you, NO CAP. The way I see it, you owe me one jelly donut. BET.

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Anon in Ukraine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: q919z79T 02/23/22(Wed) 22:52:29 No.362756862 F--- I wanted to sleep. Odessa bro here. I woke up because I heard a couple of distant explosions like 40 minutes ago. Does anybody know what happened? >>362757003 # >>362757030 # >>362757332 # >>362757456 # >>362757470 # Anonymous (ID: wi8f50f3) >>362758404 # Anonymou 02/23/22(Wed)22:53:03 No.362757030 >>362756862 # you are under attack retard

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We wuz celebratin' | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: bbgL6iKs 280 KB JPG 06/18/21(Fri)14:06:52 No.326478624 >june 17th >juneteenth eve >leave tray of fried chicken and watermelon slices out for the ghost of harriet tubman >wake up the next morning >"Dad where did my bike go?" >mfw its a Juneteenth miracle

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An interesting title | /r/Greentext

connect 4.jpg 37 KB JPG >Valiant effort, Mr. Bond. However, you neglected to look diagonally.

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Anon downloading all the personality DLCs | /r/Greentext

File: br2049.png (228 KB, 325x570) Anonymous 11/27/21 (Sat)01:09:10 No.159735798 >>159735816 >>159735873 >>159735919 >>159739580 >>159739689 >>159739723 Anyone here bought the bladerunner coat from Amazon? Is it good? Anonymous 11/27/21 (Sat)01:09:35 No.159735816 >>159735864 >>159736148 >>159737183 >>159738451 >>159739246 >>159739465 >>159739580 >>159739639 >>159739741 >>159739884 >>159742766 >>159743101 >>159735798 (OP) # I wear it over my drive jacket.

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ching chong a-non | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/22/22 (Wed)16:17:23 No.880626760 >be me >6ft2in black man >walking >come across group of asian men >they are like 5"2" >they say "ohhh nooo, here come the shadow man, bring out ur fwied chicken 24 KB GIF so he no beat us up" >mfw they each pull out a bucket of kfc chicken >they give me the chicken >they run away and yell "haha, black person likes fried chicken" >dont really care, free food >go home w-- did i experience can tiny d--- asians even be chads?

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Greentext Stories - Anon misses his friend | /r/Greentext

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File: mourning.jpg (67 KB, 953x960) 伊 >wonder what happened to him >look up "yemen june 28 2019" Anonymous 06/23/22(Thu)00:11:05 No.880619305 >>880619627 >>880619787 >>880620378 >be me >stupid 16 year old gamer incel >have a friend online >hes this yemeni chad kid >the kid is like 12 and already decently funny >we play CS:GO together alot >his accent is funny but he actually f------ kicks ass >he says he lives in ta'is or something unpronounceable like that >one night >june 27, 2019 >he says hes logging off, and he'll see me tommorow >last logged in 8 hours ago >last logged in one day ago >last logged in two weeks ago >last logged in two years ago >"US manufactured bomb used on deadly air strike on civilians" >some bomb hit his f------ house and killed him >damn. >the kid prob wanted to play more CS:GO in the morning, never woke up to get the chance >still hurts a bit

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