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File: 144454604094.png (430 KB, 716x632) *CONCERN* Swallowed a bullet Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:04:05 No.54293204 ► >>54293211 >>54293214 >>54293218 >>54293244 >>54293261 >>54293357 >>54293361 >>54293362 >>54293387 >>54293405 >>54293505 >>54293517 >>54293540 >>54293681 >>54293691 >>54293718 >>54293874 >>54294014 >>54294186 >>54294468 >>54296150 >>54296294 >>54297322 >>54297328 >>54297354 >>54297786 >>54297854 >>54298021 >>54298536 >>54298557 >>54300168 >>54300259 >>54300983 >>54301188 >>54301405 >>54302111 >>54302132 >>54302181 >>54303112 >>54303562 >>54303827 >>54304485 >>54304601 >>54304665 >>54306716 >>54309957 ☐ Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:06:10 No.54293214 ► >>54296827 >>54293204 (OP) Point your bumhole at something and s--- out like a gun. Welp, I'm a f------ retard, /k/. I went to the range today because Murika, and got home afterwards for a party. I'm up late, drunk, and decided to not let the gunk build up overnight so I was mindlessly cleaning my XD-9 and playing with a bullet between my teeth when a firework went off right outside and I swallowed instinctively. So yeah. I swallowed a 9mm FMJ 124grn. Head to the ER? Or see if it'll pass the old fashioned way? I'm a pretty healthy thirtysomething, and even with insurance ER ain't free. Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:05:45 No.54293211 ► >>54293233 >>54293330 >>54293353 >>54293359 Bit worried now >>54293204 (OP) you'll s--- it out. prob absorb the same amount of lead that you had been playing with a bullet in your mouth. Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:36:58 No.54293369 ► >>54293394 >>54301441 >>54302227 File: 1654716629006.jpg (17 KB, 474x266) OF S--- THE PERCER Lmao, finally a proper /k/ thread after all thos reddit pro Ukraine shills. I have 9mm,45,. 357,5.56,5.45,7.62 and 12g. Your experinece might just encourage me to give it a go (the last time i tried my friends dissuaded me and i listened to them because i was drunk af). So please dont listen to the f--- ITT and dont go to the ER try it for at least a day, keep me posted and if it goes well i will also try and take the bullet pill. Listen here OP, i have thought of trying out swallowing differnt calibers of ammunition, to see what is the largest calibre my body can tolerate. Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:38:49 No.54293382 ► >>54293836 >>54302267 >>54293362 Yeah I have a dumb habit of chewing on things like pens and such. I think that's over now. So yeah. I swallowed a 9mm FMJ 124grn. Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:36:16 No.54293362 ► >>54293382 >>54293204 (OP) OP HERE. I'M ALIVE. >>54303562 Tell us what the doc said >>54293204 (OP) Why did you think putting a bullet in your mouth was a good idea? Do you do this often? Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)09:31:10 No.54303827 ► Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)06:47:41 No.54302613 ► >>54303215 File: OP.jpg (107 KB, 1024x922) File: 1651953997326.jpg (7 KB, 228x221) S--- it out and fire it. Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)08:53:25 No.54303570 ► >>54303590 Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)08:52:45 No.54303562 ► >>54303570 >>54303658 >>54303897 >>54304279 >>54306381 >>54306442 >>54306779 File: 1462415787653.jpg (14 KB, 200x156) >>54304455 >pic related Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)09:14:08 No.54303706 ► File: ray-liotta-laughing.gif (415 KB, 220x217) Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)08:56:05 No.54303590 ► >>54303617 >>54303706 >>54303940 >>54304279 >>54306891 >>54310064 Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)17:32:17 No.54306891 ► >>54307266 >>54310064 File: 490618514-612x612.jpg (38 KB, 440x483) Whether you believe it's me or not, don't care. Just glad it's over with. I left this thread after about an hour of posting and went to the ER. Just got home now. $600 after insurance for x-rays, activated charcoal, laxatives, overnight stay, and blood tests (one when I got there, one before discharge. So long story short I shat it out intact, and according to my last blood test looks like I'm more or less in the clear. Doc made me feel like even more of a dumbass than you guys did. No pics of the s--- covered bullet because what is wrong with you. So that's the end to this. OP's a dumbass but gets to live another day. >>54303590 >"Respectfully sir, this is one of the stupidest cases I've ever had a grown man bring on themselves in my career." >>54303590 >>54306891 Petition to bestow OP with the tripname "Bulletshitter" Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)11:16:30 No.54304468 ► >>54304470 >>54308662 File: slowpoke.jpg (40 KB, 547x441) >>54293204 (OP) Try to join a flight, maybe you get jailed for being a IED Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)15:53:00 No.54294186 ► >>54307724 >>54293204 (OP) OP if you have a failure to eject, you may be undergassed. You may need to start eating beans if that round doesn't come out on its own. Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)13:06:05 No.54293517 ► >>54293805 >>54294337 File: 1640736226372.png (43 KB, 240x240) Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)17:21:00 No.54306779 ► File: where do you think we are.webm (912 KB, 640x480)-[Close] >>54303562 >No pics of the s--- covered bullet because what is wrong with you. >>54304279 Yeah it cost a bit, but note that I'm annoyed not devastated. $600 sucks but overall it won't affect my bottom line. Where do you think we are? ☐ Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)22:08:53 No.54297322 ▶ >>54297381 >>54302290 >>54304518 File: 1654447693173m.jpg (96 KB, 815x1024) Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)22:15:23 No.54297381 ► >>54297982 >>54303570 After it was revealed I was perfectly fine his demeanor totally changed from concerned to annoyed. was like "Respectfully sir, this is one of the stupidest cases I've ever had a grown man bring on themselves in my career." Never going back to that Urgent Care Center as long as I live. >>54297322 >How do you like your coffee? >Loaded. Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)11:46:55 No.54304665 ► File: 13b2c878-59b3-4451-a959-b(...).gif (1.05 MB, 400x215) >>54293242 Full cartridge, yep. >>54293204 (OP) WHY IS IT ALWAYS A F------ XD OWNER? WHY ARE ALL XD OWNERS RETARDS? >>54293204 (OP) >I'm a f------ retard >late, drunk >playing with a bullet between my teeth >I swallowed >thirtysomething HEY, FIRE IT UP! FIRE IT UP! Let's try these nightmare Everything looks exactly vision goggles the same >>54293204 (OP) AjhahahHAHAHA! Get me into the screencap! And yeah I saw it. With the laxatives it was pretty much all water and they made me s--- into this collection thingy. I actually audibly heard the round hit the plastic and it was pretty apparent in the tube. Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)22:55:21 No.54297786 ► File: 1629006461035.gif (1.33 MB, 498x498) Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)08:02:26 No.54303215 ► File: 1656875127379.png (3 KB, 203x217) Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)13:43:32 No.54293681 ► File: 1406286053883.gif (1.8 MB, 324x208) Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)00:06:23 No.54298515 ► Try using a silencer so neighbors wont find out when it hits the toilet ☐ Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)09:42:22 No.54303897 ► >>54303927 S--- and shoot op >>54303590 >"Respectfully sir, this is one of the stupidest cases I've ever had a grown man bring on themselves in my career." Anon, you realize that your name and address will be held in that hospital files forever, with the adnotation stating something like "possible irresponsible behaviour/mental deficiency leading to self-injures". And if you are really unlucky (which you probably are, judging from this story), your file will be labeled like "Bulletshitter" or something similar for a sake of finding it quicker as a reference if somethig like your case will happen again? t. guy who was working in archiving and disposal of old medical records from ER Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)22:39:05 No.54310064 >>54293204 (OP) Kek OP gonna die >>54303562 OP went from "bit the bullet" to "s--- the bullet" Imao Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)09:47:16 No.54303927 ► File: 1600539135635 (1).jpg (223 KB, 1000x1232) >>54303897 >>54293233 So you didn't just swallow bullet, but the complete cartridge and the powder? Anon Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:14:41 No.54293255 ► >>54293330 >>54293340 >>54293714 >>54296376 >>54301153 >>54303143 >>54304455 >>54304518 >>54306415 >>54309997 >>54310022 File: Everyday+we+drift+further(...).jpg (14 KB, 325x157) >>54302613 This will unironically tell op if the primer was comprimised and if he needs immediate chelation therapy to prevent brain damage kek there it is Anonymous 07/05/22(Tue)12:12:32 No.54293242 ► >>54293255 >>54300002 >>54301216 >>54293204 (OP) I'm sorry, OP, but you're a dead man walking. Once the bullet finds your intestines, it will send out its roots and start growing inside you. Depending on the type of bullet, you'd see different effects, but since it's a 9mm you won't feel anything at first. That is, until a new Glock Tree is growing out of your throat. I'd recommend suicide. It's the only way to avoid a very painful death. I actually audibly heard the round hit the plastic and it was pretty Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)09:14:08 No.54303706 ► File: ray-liotta-laughing.gif (415 KB, 220x217) Anonymous 07/06/22(Wed)04:51:05 No.54301439 File: 1651777349160.jpg (288 KB, 720x720) why didnt you induce vomiting retard

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Anon swallows a bullet by accident


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File: 1697975654965394.png (626 KB, 882x661) Russians form a mechanized battalion from the crew of the Admiral Kuznetsov aircraft carrier ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:43:58 No.62547520 >>62547549 >>62547640 >>62547779 >>62547930 >>62548026 >>62548130 >>62548146 >>62548167 >>62548426 >>62548452 >>62548545 >>62548551 >>62548626 >>62549652 >>62550289 >>62550646 >>62550651 >>62551002 >>62552479 >>62552913 >>62553443 >>62553449 >>62556171 >>62556338 >>62560060 >>62560830 >>62561063 >We were sent to the front last month, somewhere near Pokrovsk. The kind of place where the wind howls through hollowed-out villages, and the ground is soft from more than rain. >They brought the "special troops" in two weeks after we arrived. >They arrived in the dead of night, no fanfare, no noise. Just a convoy of black trucks with no markings. Their uniforms were like ours, mostly. But they didn't wear them quite right. The fit was off, too loose in places, too tight in others, as if they weren't built for human bodies. >But nobody questioned it-how could we? Orders are orders. They kept to themselves, rarely spoke, and when they did, it was in low voices, murmuring to each other in a language I didn't recognize. It wasn't Russian. It wasn't any language I'd ever heard before. It sounded wet, like the words were being dragged through water, thick and heavy in their throats. >Some of the men said that they were mutants, survivors of some forgotten Soviet ship. We laughed, but it was forced. >The first time we went out on patrol with them, they kept going off on their own. >Eventually, I got curious. >I followed one into a bombed out building. There was a body on the ground, a civilian, maybe. Torn apart, limbs scattered across the room, skin peeled back like a butchered animal. He was knelt down beside the body, slow and deliberate, and reached out with one hand and pressed against it. I swear to God, I saw the body twitch. Just for a moment. A flicker of life or something close to life-stirring in the corpse. Then it stopped. >I backed away before he could notice me. I didn't tell anyone what I saw. Who would believe me? >After that, I started noticing things. The way they never seemed to sleep, just stood in their tents at night, perfectly still. The way the smell of rot followed them, no matter where they went. >I don't know what they are. I don't think I want to know. But they're not soldiers. >And whatever they're doing here, it's not for the war. Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:35:39 No.62548545 >>62548556 >>62547520 (OP) >Zhenya got shot during the last raid >We were on our way back, doing our best to keep the trees between us and the hohols >Zhenya was in the lead with one of the Hовобранеч when we came to a large gap in the treeline >We thought we were far enough back to risk a sprint across instead of belly-crawling through the muck like usual >Sergeant Korolevsky tried to order the новобранеч to run across, but it didn't seem to hear him and kept listlessly rolling its head around to stare at...well, God alone knows what it saw. >That meant Zhenya was up, poor bastard. >He had an icon one of the Orthodox priests was selling, and he took a moment to pray to it before starting off >Maybe we had gotten turned around, or maybe they had a forward position not on the maps. Maybe it was another of their damned spotter drones. I don't know. >In any case, Zhenya was halfway across when their sniper opened up on him >The first round was short, but he got winged by the second >Even from fifty meters away I could see his leg was bending wrong before he toppled over >Even from fifty meters away, we could hear him screaming >The новобранeч's head instantly snapped around to face Zhenya >Sergeant Korolevsky was yelling at us to take cover while he ordered a smoke mission, but the новобранеч didn't hear that, either >It reached the edge of the trees and started loping over to where Zhenya lay >The sniper opened up on the Hовобранеч, naturally >The first round hit the dirt at its feet, but it took no more notice of that than it had Sergeant Korolevsky >The second hit the новобранеч in the chest, but its armor must have taken the brunt of the impact because it didn't even slow down >I'm not sure what happened to the third shot. The bullet landed some distance behind the новобранеч, and I though I saw a puff of dust around its chin, but I couldn't be sure. >> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:36:53 No.62548556 >>62549969 >>62551438 >>> >>62548545 >By that point, it had reached Zhenya, and bent over to inspect him >Zhenya hadn't stopped screaming, of course. He'd sold the last dose of painkillers to a Chechen for some food the last time we were in the rear, and the bullet must have missed anything vital or he would have bled out by now >But as the Hовобранеч stood over him, a note of something other than pain entered his cries >It seemed to stand there for a minor eternity as the sniper put more shots out towards the two of them, but the sniper's aim seemed off and the rounds went wild >Finally, the Hовобранеч grabbed Zhenya by his plate carrier and hoisted hoisted him over its shoulder one-handed >It loped off to the other side of the gap, then kept going >We could hear Zhenya's screaming fade as it disappeared into the distance, but the mortar's weren't working yet and none of us fancied out chances against the sniper >Eventually the mission came in and we were able to cross the gap >Korolevsky must have been owed a favor for it to come in at all. Thank God for the minor mercies, I suppose. >When we made it back to our lines, Zhenya wasn't there >That was probably for the best, given that we didn't even have clean water, much less an aid station >I heard that he had been sent back to the rear for surgery, and that was the last we knew of Zhenya >We tried asking after him a few more times, but our commander reminded us what happened to people who drew attention to themselves >We cursed his luck at first, me and the rest of my unit >But now.. >A week or two after Zhenya got shot, we were out in one of the trenches and needed some extra ammo >Arkady left the trenches his normal blustery self >The man who returned was quiet, almost ashen-faced. >Naturally, we asked him why, and he told us he had seen the newest batch of Hовобранечи >He said he thought one of them walked with a limp and had a tarnished cross around its neck >Now, we do not talk of Zhenya any more. ☐ Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)02:47:57 No.62551438 ►>>62553469 >>62548556 >We called him Goggles. He shipped in after Vashnya died. >A great big balaclava hung loosely around his crooked neck. A rotted row of teeth peaked out from underneath his mask to greet us, and atop it all sat those bulky tinted goggles. They were so dark its a wonder he could see at all. >He never spoke Russian. He'd chatter to himself like a squirrel, huddled in the foxhole he'd torn into the ground with his hands. >I meant to welcome him with a drink. Maybe I needed some companionship. I found him crumpled against the wall of his burrow, snoring in big, wheezy exhales. He somehow faced me despite his chest being pressed into the foxhole wall. >I went to wake him, grabbing the man's shoulder, but it felt all wrong. I knew firsthand what our uniforms felt like, that there should have been no thick, rubbery layer under our cloth, but as I grabbed something slid and slipped under my hands and I began to feel uneasy. He failed to wake. >My eyes drifted to his namesake. A peek wouldn't hurt, right? My hand grasped the plastic and pulled, coming away with a sickening squelch. >A fetid smell made me wretch, yet it could not hold a candle to the sight below me. >Streaky pale skin greeted me, blotched with unnatural color and run through with swollen veins. It hung loose, like an ill-fitting wetsuit, and the gaunt skeleton below seemed sharp and unfamiliar. A few strand of hair, the color and texture of rotting hay, lay haphazardly around his face. >The eyes were the worst. Sunken, pitted, partially covered with swollen eyelids yet open, they reminded me of two shiny black olives. I realized with horror that each eye held a dark gaping wound, as if the two orbs had been pitted. >In those ragged teeth I could see flesh, torn from the bleeding scabs that used to be his lips and god knows where else. >And though it never stopped wheezing, I could have sworn a ghost of a smile played across its maw as I scrambled in from its burrow. >We never did share that drink. >> Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:50:09 No.62547548 ► >> >soldier formerly stationed on Kusnetsov gets administered to hospital for withdrawal symptoms related to breathing clean air not saturated with sulfur and soot Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:50:25 No.62547549 ► >>62547520 (OP). >mind your business stalger Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)16:57:15 No.62547585 ►>>62547595 >> >why contain it << >> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)17:48:25 No.62547887 >>62548016 >>62548051 >>62550308 >>62550328 >>62554367 >>62558331 >>62563352 >>62547779 The gates of Rl'yeh are open and the dreamer dreams everything. Two more millenia. Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:08:26 No.62548016 >>62548051 >>62550310 >>62554367 >>62558331 >>62547887 The Idiot God is a rooster, but the Black Pharaoh is raising the eyebrow. Once the mother of a thousand young gives birth, the West will understand everything and their Miskatonic "advisors" in the so called Ukraine will wail and claw at their eyes in blind, all devouring madness. la! In! Z phtagn! Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:09:06 No.62548026 ►>>62548050 >>62548169 >>62551012 File: 1585525075136.png (1.25 MB, 1302x1294) >>62547520 (OP) F--- off Deep Ones, this is Goat territory ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:14:46 No.62548050 ►>>62548065 File: the yellow sign.jpg (11 KB, 480x360) >>62548026 go back2 woods shub >>> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:14:53 No.62548051 >>62548107 >>62554367 >>62558331 >>62547887 >>62548016 for more information check out Intel Phtagn C >>☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)18:17:48 No.62548065 >>62548169 >>62550990 File: 65165165165.jpg (226 KB, 850x1200) >>62548050 Make me >>☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:17:32 No.62548394 ►>>62548507 >>62550406 >>62551114 >>62560298 >>62561649 >>> I hear the Russians are conscripting shoggoths from the cyclopean ruins beneath the non euclidean peaks of the Urals. How will those stack up against the Americans from the Devil's Reef PMC? ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:36:05 No.62548547 >>62548651 My buddy forgot the number rule, THEY COME FROM THE ANGLES. ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:49:13 No.62548651 ► File: 1593464725608.jpg (286 KB, 816x1253) >>62548547 That sounds very silly and highly unlikely to ever happen >>> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:38:04 No.62548564 ►>>62548663 In this house we salute the tatters of the King and kneel before the Yellow Sign. >> Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)19:41:22 No.62548588 ► We must avoid any escalatory measures against the Church of Starry Wisdom. >>> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)20:22:45 No.62548938 >>62549013 >>62550498 Irrelevant, Flying Polyps are useless in a GROUND war >> ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)20:43:58 No.62549106 >>62549205 >>62550520 I only get my news from cryptic messages from Dreamland Cats. ☐ Anonymous 09/20/24(Fri)20:56:04 No.62549205 ►>>62550520 >>62549106 I only get my Information from Pickman's paintings. He drew Prigo's march on Moscow months ahead. The bad part is that he also painted what drove Prigo to do it, and I have been unable to get a decent nichts sleep ever since. >> Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)00:25:11 No.62550520 >>62550556 >>62549106 >>62549205 Fools, the only reliable source of information comes from the final moments of the actors' lives whilst their tweaking out during the climax of the third act of The King in Yellow. >> ☐ Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)00:27:36 No.62550533 ►>>62550603 >>62551235 >>62554090 >>62559698 >>62560176 >>62560315 File: Putin-1578996.jpg (25 KB, 590x350) >three years into the SOO (Special occult operation), and this is what Russia has to show for it: >loses the temple of the Old Ones on Snake Island after briefly siezing it(remember that he who controls Snake Island controls the course of history) << >unable to take Odessa despite trying to bribe Dagon for assistance with VDV mass sacrifices (Deep Ones feast on the floating corpses, refuse to step into the meat grinder) >Bogged down by undead SS divisions in Mariupol, leading to the Donbas Holocaust becoming reality at last (courtesy of Dr Herbert West) >feeding a good chunk of the gunship fleet into a time anomaly (were they are exploding to this day) >Prigozhin driven so mad by what he saw in the "salt mines" that he marched on Moscow to stop Putin from further meddling in things he doesn't comprehend (to no avail, the sacrifices will continue until the stars improve) >Wagner columns getting massacred by Alhazredi cultists in Africa (prisoner used in rituals) >GUR showing more and more signs of being led by an avatar of Nyarlahotep And that's just what I can come up with on the drop of a hat. There's bound to be more. Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat)04:51:52 No.62552172 Igor thought he would get a part on the spoils of the land; the only thing he got was a grenade to the face. His flesh was charred, few of his teeth remain, where the nose used to be now there was a deep hole, his eye sockets were empty, a white substance running from the edges down the cheeks. Igor did not have a face anymore, but his body did not care, he kept going through the mud, the flooded trenches, the rat infested camps and bombed fields, searching for a face, his body demanded a face, and he was going to get one. Even to this day, every mobik watched carefully between the rows of trees, because he could be there, stalking and waiting for the moment to reclaim what he lost. >> Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat) 14:33:17 No.62554147 File: Download-1.jpg (14 KB, 259x194) >>62554344 >>62554391 >>> Found this in an abandoned trench. What unit is this? Anonymous 09/21/24(Sat) 15:15:27 No.62554344 ► >>62554147 How you do, fellow earthling primate, that is a bad luck sign, I would not use it. My advice is genuine.
File: 1375153631534.jpg-(79 KB, 1023x797, 1367472222142.jpg) Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:07 UTC-5 No. 17355769 >>17355833 >>17355954 >>17356893 Replies: >>17355793 >>17355796 >>17355804 >>17355816 Lets say you're flying a mission over enemy territory in a helicopter when suddenly you are hit with a MANPAD/SAM/AAA. How would you e--------? Would it be possible without hitting the blades? Also helicopter thread Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:10 UTC-5 No. 17355816 >>17355769 (OP) I would stroke until the missile hit, then paint the cockpit white with man foam. Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:09 UTC-5 No. 17355804 >>17355769 (OP) I wouldn't have to worry about e---------- cause I'd be f------ dead. /k/ - A Magical Place Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:11 UTC-5 No. 17355833 Replies: >>17355847 >>17355860 >>17355876 >>17355769 (OP) I would climb out of the burning helicopter as it spiraled out of control, standing proudly in the open door with my erect c--- in hand, e---------- over everyone in sight until the chopper smashed into the ground and exploded around me. The last thing my enemies would see of me is flaming semen coating their stunned faces, and thus the war was won. Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:28 UTC-5 No. 17356110 Replies: >>17356142 >deep in enemy territory >missiles everywhere >suddenly direct hit >rotor on fire and chopper gets hit again >look over at pilot >he's sitting there screaming and jerking it Anonymous 07/29/13(Mon)22:30 UTC-5 No.17356142 >>17356110 In a Kiowa, that wouldn't be all that weird.
File: 1538517416955m.jpg (112 KB, 1024x768) OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 14:16:15 No.39810376 >>39810436 >>39810445 >>39810663 >>39810708 >>39810899 >>39811038 >>39811183 >>39811856 I finally did it /k/. I actually f------ done it and don't know what exactly to say about it. Long story short I went out hunting in the Ozarks (Arkansas Man here) and killed a Deer and decided to actually f--- it's vagina and it felt good despite the weird situation. I don't know if anyone saw but it was something alright and decided to tag it later and had it cut up and now gonna have deer steak for dinner tonight. There is a f------ alot of deer in Arkansas which would explain why everyone comes here to this natural state. >> ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 14:23:27 No.39810436 ►>>39810498 >>39810376 (OP). >F----- it than are it. Congrats you're going to hell OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 14:31:12 No.39810498 ►>>39810816 >>39812326 >>39810436 I'm not going to hell because I'm a good christian and god loves me. At least i ate the animal and not left it to rot like some of other people around here do! OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:20:33 No.39810873 >>39810890 >>39810663 I didn't have my phone because I was hunting, not posting and twittering s--- and besides i rented out a cabin around northwest so I can enjoy the time of being away from a town for a while anyways and now I'm back. Anyhow the meat was pretty good and it's great in stew making. >>39810708 I was hunting at first but the temptation after approaching it got the betterment of me and yes it was dying as I had my pleasures with it's vagina but at least it was still warm before it passed. >>39810754 Take me a while to greentext it out so give me a moment will ya? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)15:22:31 No.39810890 ► >>39810873 use a trap next time, throw a net on it or order a form of tranqs. OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:23:19 No.39810893 ►>>39810915 >>39810951 >>39810816 the temptation after approaching it got the betterment of me I'm not a bad man alright and besides it wasn't the first animal I committed sin before. I f----- a hog before during hunting but that was because I was curious. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:24:28 No.39810898 ► Anon I'm on nofap, you'd better give me something juicy I'm not a bad man alright OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:38:36 No.39811023 >>39811095 >>39811139 >>39811155 >>39811365 >>39811380 >>39811899 >>39811960 >>39812302 >>39812374 >>39812713 >>39812959 >>39812978>>39813276 >be me >be out in deep woods of the Ozarks >have my mosin nagant that i had with me for a long time >it's rusted badly after accidentally dropping it in the river but retrieved it and cleaned it up so it's clean and safe to shoot in my opinion >be wearing nothing but boots, blue jeans and a wife beater's shirt >hidden beside a giant rock and some trees and overlooking the river >see a pack of deer come by and see a buck nearby one of them >pick my rifle up and take aim but can't hit the buck since the f----- was behind a tree and a crowd of other does >decide to kill me a female deer instead >take aim at the biggest one >pull trigger >BOOM >the rest scatter and the one i hit fell and got up and gallop down the river side then fell several feets away making loud deer noise >f------ ears hurt and unload my spent surplus round >make my way over to the dying deer and was about to shoot it's head >see it's vagina >get tempted and feel my erection build up >goddamnit >try and resist but the curiosity got the betterment of me and i decided to drop my pants and boxer while holding my rifle on one hand >get on my knees and press my d--- up against it's p---- >it kicks it's legs and yelps so i ended up headbutted the deer in the head with my rifle and it stopped and just shook from nerve shock instead >slide my d--- in and started to f--- the deer >holy f--- I'm actually f------ a deer >proceed to do this for 10 minutes straight till i cummed inside >did it again and cummed again inside >by this point the vagina was cold and i pulled my d--- out >it felt f------ good >go by the river and wash my crotch with natural water and pull myself together >field dress the deer and drag it back to the cabin and proceed to take the meat and cook me deer steak and saved the rest in a freezer >enjoyed my time in the cabin as i ate the rest of the meat and return to town And that is how my hunting trip went. Anonymous 11/24/18(Sat) 15:40:19 No.39811038 ▸ >>39811056 >>39810376 (OP) >f------ a four legged animal >f------ a corpse >f------ the corpse of a four legged animal congrats, you are now an honorary afghani OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:42:24 No.39811056 ►>>39811191 >>39811038 by this point the vagina was cold and i pulled my d--- out I'm not a Muslim. I'm a white man born and raised in Arkansas alright and I love this great state. Godbless this natural state. OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18(Sat) 15:44:50 No.39811083 So yeah that's my story. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:46:33 No.39811095 ► File: 1541828998674.png (180 KB, 399x509) >>39811023 What the f--- Arkansas I'm not a bad man alright ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:48:54 No.39811113 >>39811207 >>39811236 How did deer poon compare to normal poon, anon? OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 15:59:50 No.39811207 ► >>39811113 It felt odd, like it was strange feeling but once you get into it you don't think and just keep thrusting til you finish. It felt like one of those normal bland fleshlights but more vertical up and down and tight around the horizontal area and it kept fluctuating between tight and soft since she was dying. By the time I finished the second time it was really soft and the deer was dead then before i field dressed it and taking it back to the cabin. ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:01:04 No.39811221 >>39811263 All memes aside the first person I met in Arkansas f----- his 1st cousin the day I met him Arkansas is a weird place /k/ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:03:52 No.39811246 >>39811258 >>39811260 >>39813291 Wait... is this the same Arkansas guy that had a makeshift boat that overturned on water and lost his rifle in the water then dived in to get it abd came across a water moskin snake but but the snake hard on the neck and retrieved his rifke and got on shore and ripped the snakes head off with his own teeth? Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:05:55 No.39811269 >>39811316 This is why skinwalkers stay away from Arkansas. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:07:12 No.39811282 ► Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:11:38 No.39811316 ►>>39811332 >>39811269 What if he accidentally a skinwalker and that was the skinwalker he accidentally? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:13:10 No.39811332 >>39811350 >>39811316 that's why no one finds them, they're slow because they're inbred. their disguise is actually a beacon for fellow degenerates ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:16:06 No.39811350 ► >>39811332 I mean what if op actually just necroraped a skinwalker and ate it? Why are you shocked? OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:28:37 No.39811444 ► I thought you guys like to f--- deer? Why are you shocked? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:31:27 No.39811469 >>39811479 File: 48DCFE7E-E429-49F6-905A-2(...).jpg (8 KB, 310x230) 60 DED CH Hey mods, can you make this ban a public one? I haven't seen one in person in the 5 years I've been here. It is the Thanksgiving season after all Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:32:11 No.39811479 ► >>39811849 >>39811469 this ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 16:47:52 No.39811593 >>39811921 Is that you kero the wolf Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 17:36:28 No.39811899 ► >>39811023 So, truth-time, OP. Was it better than your sister? kero the wolf Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 17:45:45 No.39811960 ▸ >>39812104 >>39811023 Only in f------ arky. You guys are actually messed up in the head. Stop inbreeding OP !SXvs.ZOEU2 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:05:43 No.39812104 ► >>39811960 Hey don't talk s--- about Arkansas you a------! This state is the greatest state in the United States and we have more guns, more gun rights, more animals, more game, more freedom than Texas and Florida plus we got f------ diamonds so shut it prick. Plus the age of consent here is 16 while it's 18 in Texas only. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:17:07 No.39812213 ►>>39813756 And this is why /k/ is nsfw Plus the age of consent here is 16 while it's 18 in Texas Why are you shocked? ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:21:07 No.39812240 ► >S--- summer >S--- winter >All creatures want to bite you >Ticks are everywhere and so are snakes and brown recluses >The ground is soft everywhere and the non soft grounds are nothing but rocks everywhere >The Ozarks are impassable unless you're walking due to lack of funding for roads >Locals are borderline feral or addicted to Meth and won't blink when they get a chance at killing >Church based militias are likely to kidnap you in a SHTF scenario >More guns and knifes in the entire state than the armories in Texas and that is not counting for the non documented owned guns >Literal stories of people disappearing in the Ozark Forest in just 24 hours and search teams won't even bother searching for them unless pressured to do it >Not even Skinwalkers would want to step foot into Arkansas due to fear of getting r---- and murdered and possibly eaten by the Arkansas locals >F------ Hogs man Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:29:05 No.39812302 ►>>39812325 >>39812729 File: the.jpg (78 KB, 800x526) >>39811023 Honestly? reading this gave me a massive boner. and it just accepts it. I'd love to forcibly f--- something like that while it's life slowly slips away. It has no choice but to lay there. I can dump my seed inside of it. Whatever I want to it, But I would like to feed it to family afterwards, eating it alone would be too f----- up. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:32:27 No.39812325 ► >>39812302 >But I would like to feed it to family afterwards >eating it alone would be too f----- up. huh I'd love to forcibly f--- something like that while it's life slowly slips away. It has no choice but to lay there. But I would like to feed it to family afterwards, eating it alone would be too f----- up. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:32:34 No.39812326 ►>>39812374 >>39810498 >some people around here shoot deer, f--- their corpses, and leave them to rot. That's just not right. Don't they know you're supposed to use every part of the animal. Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat) 18:38:21 No.39812374 ► >>39812326 That... actually raises a good point. >>39811023 OP, you forgot to mention the a---. too f----- up Not using every part of the animal would be sinfully wasteful I mean, you did use its a------, right? Not using every part of the animal would be sinfully wasteful, and I know you're a good christian who wouldn't waste what the good lord provided. ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)22:10:33 No.39814186 ► File: fed.png (34 KB, 298x279) Stop it, boner. >>39812417 Goddamnit anon, stop making me want to defile woodland animals ☐ Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)22:44:28 No.39814454 ► File: 1525122191621.jpg (84 KB, 596x598) This whole f------ thread is a showcase of autism and I love it. too f----- up Anonymous 11/24/18 (Sat)23:05:54 No.39814586 ► File: 1539552825897.gif (788 KB, 600x338) i wonder if the people who processed your deer noticed c-- dripping out and began to wonder I'm proud of you, OP Why are you shocked? 11/24/18: /K/ommando F---- a Deer A MAGICAL PLACE /k/
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