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: Anonymous is it true 03/12/23(Sun)17:51:59 No.30020742 if a guy c--- in you, does ur body really absorb the dna and make you more attracted to him? thats kinda f----- up desu... if i get a bf i dont want to get mind controlled by his c-- into becoming his wife. that would hot i mean hot i mean weird. 132 KB JPG : Anonymous >>30020742 (OP) # >does ur body really absorb the dna and make you more attracted to him? it's natures attempt at std prevention >>30020778 # 03/12/23(Sun)17:55:59 No.30020770 : Anonymous 36 KB JPG 03/12/23(Sun)17:57:33 No.30020778 >>30020742 (OP) # >>30020770 # >>30020789 # >>30020800 # >>30020824 # >>30020870 # : Anonymous >>30020824 # If this is a real thing can I just r--- girls and then they'll like me and forgive me afterwards? 03/12/23(Sun)17:59:21 No.30020789 >>30020778 # yes. in the past it used to be called marriage

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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File size: 282 KB

HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon complains about gay demon show | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 03/11/23(Sat)21:20:21 No.30011320 >Be a failed artist >Do a fundraiser on an animation and spend more time with it than with animation >Call yourself a LGBT ally while making every gay character a manslut that only wants sex >Gain a p--- addicted dumbass horny fanbase that will buy everything Helluva boss is the worst show ever

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An interesting title | /r/Greentext

64 KB JPG >year 2020 >trump is re-elected >immediately declares war on Vietnam >Vietnam war 2.0 >thousands of GenZ kids are drafted into the military A few months later... >be rice farmer in Vietnam >start hearing Lil Yaughty playing in the distance to the sounds of rotary engines >helicopters start flying over me >Gucci gang starts blasting from the helicopter speakers >whole f----- area around me gets napalmed >choppers drop off enemy troops >get smoked by a 17 year old with a pickle Rick sticker on the side of his helmet >he does the Fortnite dance over my body then yeets me into a bush

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If you're posting on 4chan, this is a plausible assumption. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous CO 765 KB PNG 09/22/18(Sat)21:16:31 No.48287 >7 year old cousin is over >She wants to play the PS4 in my room >Mom tells me to "keep the door open" What the f--- did she mean by this?

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Anon prefers experienced women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 58 KB JPG 02/26/23(Sun)22:41:23 No.72374350 >bang virgin girl >dead fish in bed >has to do an hour of foreplay so it doesnt hurt her Yea Id much rather be with an experienced girl tbqh originally

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Dating advice | /r/Greentext

American (ID: TJ2H1bFN) How do I get a girlfriend 03/10/23(Fri) 19:01:32 No.419225752 dreamstime. B878F776-5C6B-4AE9-BFC8-67F8E69B676E.jpg 69 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: n453ZzFh ) [ 03/10/23(Fri)19:16:08 No.419227109 Be brown and find your local liberal white girl and ask her out. She won't refuse because she won't want to he labelled as a racist, plus she will want to use you as an accessory to get extra woke points with her liberal friends and upset their emotionally distant dad. It worked for me.

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Anon is a chimp | /r/Greentext

File: LolSkincolor.png (748 KB, 637x658) LSD Experience Thread Anonymous (ID: ihdpZKMB) 08/4/20(Tue)15:00:22 No.111234356 ► >Be me, chimp >tfw 3'4 beta chimplet >Born and raised in zoo enclosure >One day finished daily task of hitting tire swing with stick and smearing it with feces >Perform this ritual every day so the Gods may reward our offering with chimp snax. >See my lifetime crush Chimpette swinging over on a vine >autism.exe >have to say something >"H-how's it h-hanging?" >she giggles "you're so cute Chimpanon." >Suddenly out of nowhere Chimpad comes and immediately starts f------ the s--- out Chimpette right in front of me >mfw she's enjoying it >"When you're the alpha chimp they let you do it." >He beats the s--- out of me afterwards to assert dominance >No place in chimpciety: can't escape because zoo enclosure is the only reference point I have, and therefore can't conceive of anything else, can't get qt Chimpettes cuz Chimpad's biological dominance, stuck with dead end job smearing feces on the tire swing. >Fall into deep chimpression. >Start questioning reality because no other option, thinking it's rigged against me. >See the hairless Gods atop their terrace, pointing at me, but can't understand what they are saying. >Keep listening and watching and eventually learn some of their symbols and words >Other chimps watching >Humans are screaming >Interpret what they are saying and realize all my chimp life I've been imprisoned, and the Gods are not gods, nothing but hairless chimps. >Tell all the other chimps >They don't believe me, so Chimpad stomps on my head >"Lmao bro you're crazy man." >Stuck in between the chimps and (((they))), but completely alone >Go insane >Chimpout >Break s---, throw s---, and attack the zookeeper. when he comes in to "feed" us >Insane chimp strength lets me rip off his face >Get shot >Die >Other chimps don't really care because already excluded from hierarchy >Everything goes back to normal

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Anon searches for Blue Moom | /r/Greentext

File: HUH.png (672 KB, 678x540) >there's one almost 9 miles away >we all pile in the car and go there >"hi do you have blue moon" >"no" >"we've got a partial-" >"yes" >friend purchases it immediately >other customers just staring at us >we leave >look at the ingredient label on the box >"blue moon flavor" >mfw >lady at the desk waits a couple seconds while we all just stand there >"I'll go check in the back" >a few minutes later O blue moon Anonymous 03/11/23(Sat)20:52:05 No.895736825 [Reply] ▶ >chatting with some friends >they mention "blue moon" ice cream >never heard of it >ask what's in it Wait, what? >nobody knows >google it >nobody knows >find an article blue moon? >they're desperately trying to find out what's in it >nobody knows >someone asks "are there any ice cream shops nearby" >> Anonymous 03/11/23(Sat)20:57:42 No.895737127 File: file.png (283 KB, 490x366) Dude...

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Dr. Disrespect's NFT machine | /r/Greentext

Dr Disrespect @DrDisrespect - 20h Imagine trying to 'extract' with an item you discovered worth $100,000 on the chain. Think about entertainment value as a viewer let alone player. A new pvp experience is upon us... 2,541 2,090 Dr Disrespect @DrDisrespect 633 Retweets 252 Quote Tweets 15K The concept of digital collectibles in an online game is so exciting to me. Especially an extraction type of game. (Sat) People saying scam and 'ugh' are just brain dead headline followers. Same people that spend a ton on skins for an annual release game. Same skins everyone has too. 12:43 PM Mar 5, 2023 1.2M Views 7,052 Likes 5.1M Fqj3En2WIAACKPs.jpg 153 KB JPG : Anonymous didn't read lol >play Dr Disrespect's magnum opus >randomly stumble upon one of the rarest finds in the game... a one of a kind pristine pure diamond bust of a unique Bored Ape NFT... that item is worth 250 thousand dollars in game, and its now in my hands... >250k grand... literally a lifechanger. I've never even DREAMED of getting this much money, just from playing a videogame! Truly amazing! >this really could be a lifechanger... maybe finally I can go for that dream vacation with my family... or maybe I'll invest and multiply that sum? Finally things are looking up... thank you for bringing such opportunities to gaming, Dr Disrespect! >>630496551 # >>630498463 # 1812 >almost there... just need to get out and l- >*suddenly get one shot through a thick concrete wall* >enter Xxx_ChangChinagamerHD_xxX, his discount sweatshop microphone barely able to output anything more than noise >NICE GOIN AMERIKAN F---- NUB I R--- YOUR MUTHA >000 WAS DIS BORE APE NFT WOOOOT TO FIFTI TAUSEND AMERIKAN DOLLA WOOOW HAHA TENKS AMERIKAN I R--- UR MOTHA I R--- UR SISTAH >SEE YU AMERIKAN 9/11 GOOD TIME 03/11/23(Sat) 14:32:41 No.630491914

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Anon wants a hug | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/02/18 (Wed)18:48:52 No.45089266 >>45089296 File: 571.png (81 KB, 658x901) SAUN >go to hug mum >she dabs on me instead mummy no

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Anon's cousin loves 40K | /r/Greentext

#46, No. 135972932 3 minutes ago 1606269304973 JPG 640x605 64.5 kB >had family over >little cousin sees some of my models >goes "ohhhhh... so this is where buzz lightyear is from" >this was before lightyear came out >he apparently fell down a 40k lore youtuber rabbithole for a while and genuinely thought that buzz lightyear was just from a space marine chapter he didnt know about yet >movie comes out >he thought it was going to be a 40k movie poor kid

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The game was rigged from the beginning | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: M991 Yhv3 D 03/11/23(Sat)15:16:55 No.419323368 1610549891101.jpg 897 KB JPG >bro just go to the gym >bro just shave your head >bro just take a shower >bro just grow a beard >bro just go outside and get some sun >bro just stop giving a f---, be confident, be tough, the p---- will come crawling to you Yikes. It looks like Chad's advice was b-------. I guess not everyone has a chance. Some guys are just screwed. Why do we keep lying to ugly people and telling them they have a chance? Is it to keep them from snapping and going on shooting sprees?

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Anon is put in place. | /r/Greentext

1 REPLY > be me > have naive 24 yo girlfriend > works in a smoke shop > talks to skeezy guys all day > tries to make friends despite skeeziness > friendly 40+ yo guy is a regular > has fat wife and 4 kids > they talk a few times, then exchange numbers > this continues for a few weeks > one morning the texts change > guy talks a lot about sexual desires > "me and my wife are thinking about adding a third person to the bedroom" > "we'd love to find someone hot like you" > gf reminds him she's in a relationship > he replies: "i know, I didn't mean you" > she ends conversation politely and tells me everything what's the play, /b/? Anonymous 10 minutes ago >>817854302 (OP) F--- his fat wife and treat her like s---. Slap her around and spit in her face. Film it and send it to him. Wait three solid months, then show up at his house and beat his ass with a baseball bat. Tell him your planning to f--- his wife again and to let her know to get her a------ ready for you. Tell him this is only the beginning and if he wants to f--- around you can always cripple one of his bitch ass kids. Make it a point to come around every three or four years and repeat the lesson. Destroy his life. 817855095

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Greentext Stories - Anonette asks a question | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

: Anonymous is it true 03/12/23(Sun)17:51:59 No.30020742 if a guy c--- in you, does ur body really absorb the dna and make you more attracted to him? thats kinda f----- up desu... if i get a bf i dont want to get mind controlled by his c-- into becoming his wife. that would hot i mean hot i mean weird. 132 KB JPG : Anonymous >>30020742 (OP) # >does ur body really absorb the dna and make you more attracted to him? it's natures attempt at std prevention >>30020778 # 03/12/23(Sun)17:55:59 No.30020770 : Anonymous 36 KB JPG 03/12/23(Sun)17:57:33 No.30020778 >>30020742 (OP) # >>30020770 # >>30020789 # >>30020800 # >>30020824 # >>30020870 # : Anonymous >>30020824 # If this is a real thing can I just r--- girls and then they'll like me and forgive me afterwards? 03/12/23(Sun)17:59:21 No.30020789 >>30020778 # yes. in the past it used to be called marriage

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