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: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)17:05:57 No.50269284 >be me >was actually going to an hero 268 KB JPG >decide to jump off bridge nearby my hometown >standing on ledge at 1 in the morning when i hear tires screech behind me >i turn around and see a pizza guy walking toward me telling me not to do it >yeahwhateverhearditabilliontimes.mp3 >see he has tears in his eyes >tells me that he lost his brother to suicide years ago and hes always felt like he needed to stop someone else's suicide >actually pretty moved by his story, i have a little bro >invites me into his car and offers me the pizza he has >drives me back to his home after calling his boss and telling him about the circumstances >all the while he's shooting the s--- and cracking me up, really chill guy >we get to an apartment downtown and he offers me to stay the night >open the door to his roommates drinking beer and playing mario kart >laugh and game with them >next morning we part ways and he gives me his phone number and tells me i can come back whenever i want >bus home, tell mom and dad i was out with friends

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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annonette makes a greaving mistake | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 153 KB JPG entire airplane 03/13/23 (Mon) 23:04:48 No.72560532 >Be me a fat 195lbs nerdy girl >have a crush on my chad friend and I went to his house to ask him out >No one opens so I see through the window >Find him balls deep inside my femboy friend >Get black out drunk and desing an

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Anon is the Messiah | /r/Greentext

Anonymous HOLY 234 KB JPG 07/14/22(Thu)00:43:46 No.69400717 I'm a (diagnosed) autistic incel. When I was a child I liked to read but my mother only had a Bible, so I memorized entire sections of it. I met a 37 year-old woman a while ago (I'm 22) and she ended up believing (for whatever reason) that I'm a prophet of God. I am very lonely so I started to entertain her delusion and now I feel like I can't come back. We are together and she says she considers herself my wife. I like her and she behaves like a mommy gf so I don't want to lose her but I feel like this s--- will end up crashing and burning. What the f--- should I do?

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Anon wants to ride the dick carousel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Is it immoral to breakup with (...) 379 KB JPG 03/13/23(Mon)23:43:59 No.895863727 Been with picrel for 4 years. We have good moments and bad moments. I'm overall pretty confident with myself now and think I might be able to do better >will post her nudes if I like the advice here : Anonymous I'm 25, flush with cash, and I'm interested in going out and f------ other bitches. Is it immoral to break up because of that? 113 KB PNG : Anonymous >>895863727 (OP) # it's immoral to remain with her if you're thinking like this 03/13/23 (Mon)23:46:56 No.895863840 03/13/23(Mon)23:45:35 No.895863787 Anon don't be a dumbass, everyone thinks that they can do better, and some can, but your playing the part of the roastie who wants to ride the d--- carousel. Do you not read the stories of other anons here who get abandoned cause some chad comes and f---- things up?

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Anon hires a prostitute | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 122 KB JPG 03/14/23(Tue)00:54:30 No.72564852 >hire escort >sit on the bed next to each other >she says I'm making her uncomfortable >leaves

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Rottin' in the state of Denmark | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 86 KB JPG 03/06/23(Mon)10:52:40 No.72470196 >anon, you have been sentenced to 5 years in Danish prison. here's your cell. no video games after 10pm and you can only get 1 new video game a month! i hope your maximum suffering causes you to think about what you did! 03/06/23(Mon)10:54:56 No.72470214 : Anonymous Cool this is basically my life now except it's Denmark so they probably let prisoners go outside.

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Anon had great music tastes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 3/13/2023, 10:58:44 AM No.57005061 JA 233 KB JPEG > be brian wilson > wake up from a decade long nap > casually make one of the best albums of the 70's and pioneer a new genre of music all by yourself > go back to bed for another decade

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Anon describes Boring Reaction Youtuber #4832 but he's famous | /r/Greentext

! Chud 28 minutes ago Nº2360965 A [Reply] >>2361060 >>236 1127 >Hey guys, Charlie here with another 15 minute video about a random comment I found on Twitter. >I won't say anything remotely interesting, just sit on the fence so I can keep collecting YouTube shekels. >I do say D--- and BALLS from time to time in a monotone voice, so I'm kinda funny, right? >Anyway, this is all for today, see you guys next time.

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Anon can't understand European prices | /r/Greentext

POMARAŃCZOW FANANINTA Низкая цена % Добрый Це НО импорт б/а с/г 0,33л/6 89.90 79 spuiew WYRAZNE : Anonymous (ID: XCmsmNF+ GIN Coca-Cola Coca TASTE Coca-Cola DODAJ MNIE DO RECYKLIN 03/12/23(Sun)15:50:36 No.419394790 79r is 4,60zł. Can like this in local orlen is 5zł. So Ivan in sanctioned russia can buy can of polish cola cheaper then me. IS OVER KURWA POMARAŃCZOWA CokezER 330 mi FIFANIFANZ са Sounu a |]]АРМЭЛЬ POMARAŃCZOWA ZERO JEH P இறுவது! HOK М e E Ударин 189 eury ЗЕФ HOB клюкве По кар Магнол -- дольки АПЕЛЬСИНОВНЕ ARMONE KEADPVTOBUE Mapmera 1 249

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Pissing in the wind | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 60 KB PNG 03/06/23 (Mon)13:21:10 No.72471645 >pee with eyes open, trying to aim in the toilet bowl as hard as i can >get pee sprinkles on the toilet seat >pee with eyes closed, no aiming >toilet seat is spotless do i have super powers? 03/06/23(Mon)13:22:23 No.72471660 : Anonymous Take the sitting down to pee pill

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Anon found the perfect girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 641 KB GIF 03/14/23(Tue)06:56:49 No.72564876 >met a cute girl >tried to strike a conversation by talking about the weather >she just stopped, turned her head and death stared me Patrick Bateman style >this lasted for 3 minutes before I finally can't stand the awkwardness and left she's the one bros

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Illegal recipes and doohickeys | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 56 KB JPG Anonymous 2.79 MB GIF 03/11/23(Sat)07:10:50 No. 19034725 what would happen if you put oatmilk in oatmeal? 03/11/23(Sat)07:12:22 No.19034727 >>19034725 (OP) # 03/11/23(Sat)07:18:04 No. 19034732 Anonymous >>19034725 (OP) # DO NOT do this guys it makes mustard gas.

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anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 61 KB JPG 03/14/23(Tue)02:12:02 No.72559561 >34 year old engineer comes into the surgery >Sustained inner ear damage during an industrial accident : Anonymous Alri shippy lid >Has become profoundly deaf as a result >Wants me to give him a cochlear implant >Give him a lethal dose of morphine instead : Anonymous >>72559561 (OP) # Nice to see these threads making a comeback, nature is healing 03/14/23(Tue)02:41:02 No.72559896 03/14/23(Tue)02:42:23 No.72559914

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Greentext Stories - Anon gets saved by an unlikely hero | /r/Greentext

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: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)17:05:57 No.50269284 >be me >was actually going to an hero 268 KB JPG >decide to jump off bridge nearby my hometown >standing on ledge at 1 in the morning when i hear tires screech behind me >i turn around and see a pizza guy walking toward me telling me not to do it >yeahwhateverhearditabilliontimes.mp3 >see he has tears in his eyes >tells me that he lost his brother to suicide years ago and hes always felt like he needed to stop someone else's suicide >actually pretty moved by his story, i have a little bro >invites me into his car and offers me the pizza he has >drives me back to his home after calling his boss and telling him about the circumstances >all the while he's shooting the s--- and cracking me up, really chill guy >we get to an apartment downtown and he offers me to stay the night >open the door to his roommates drinking beer and playing mario kart >laugh and game with them >next morning we part ways and he gives me his phone number and tells me i can come back whenever i want >bus home, tell mom and dad i was out with friends

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