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Anonymous >be me >15 at the time >hkless virgin >have 0 idea how to stay sane or alive >discover 4chan >acquire i----- fetish >would bang irl but parentalfags are old >relatives are dumb too Relatives >and I'm an only child >guessilljustfixthat.jfif >begini siblings 11/25/18(Sun)03:30:34 No.785761646 inducing divorce so I can bring in some step- >5 months in, it ain't working >somehow my parents have become even closer w-- >time to bring out the big guns >1 I f------ plant s--- in the bedroom for my mom to find >when I feel like it I'll say some stuff about mom talking to guys to my dad >gameon.mp4 >only 2 weeks and they are about to blow, I can feel it >it's time to deal the final blow >B) M >look for the loose stone in their relationship >mom's phone is clean as heck w-- >rummage through my dad's phone and find "gasp" pic. s?ofthots? >I'd save that s--- and upload it to 4chan any other day, but this is my time to shine Schw >show my mom >thatsit.exe >mom finally gets a divorce, she takes me, dad doesn't even try to argue (w--?) >dad gets the house >4 months into my new (s-----) life and I knew I made a mistake shut then >but then >just as I was about to go visit my dad Peng >my mom came in with >with a guy Sie this it? >is this it? is this the one? >eavesdrop to find out if he has kids my age >mostly talking about their previous dates >I wonder how they even hid their relationship from me for so long? >suddenly the topic changes >oshitkfc.gif >he has a 15 year old daughter lololol >this one's a keeper, boys >visit dad anyways because I want to laugh in the face of destin destiny >going there through a mountain trail cause why not >best f------ wagon ride of my life, dude just t as we round a corner, something hits the back of my head and knocks me out cold >when I wake up, there are three other guys in the wagon with me >mfw I'm tied up >mfw destiny is laughing at me >mfw Todd Howard is back at it again

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reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon needs a name | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 42 KB JPG 04/19/20(Sun)02:45:16 No.825648711 >be me >scrolling through the social medias >notice my cousin has the same username for all her accounts >haha wouldn't it be funny if there were a pornhub account with that name >type it after pornhub.com/users/ as a joke just to see what shows up >there are videos of my cousin sticking a dildo in her vagina and climaxing on the internet um g-guys? i don't know if anyone in my family knows about this. I don't know why she'd make it the same username as her other accounts but I really did not expect this. >>825649213 # : Anonymous 04/19/20 (Sun)02:48:10 No.825648904 What's the name?

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/fit/anon shares a cheat code | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/27/21(Tue)07:18:22 No.62759020 Fancy Feast COMPLE 100% ANCED CHICKEN FEAST CLASSIC PATÉ GOURMET CAT FOOD 76011_MAIN._AC_SL1500_V1551805038_.jpg 204 KB JPG >250 calories >42 grams of protein Why the f--- aren't you eating this you stupid f---?

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life's not fair | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago im-offing-myself.jpg (16.8 KB, 320x320) 50570874 Women HATE Thread >be me >working since i was 14 years old >fried burguers, painted wall, did whatever to get ends meet >studied math like a pig >get stupid job as math teacher where students throw s--- at me >make 60 thousand a year >pretend im happy >be belle delphine >be woman >wear make up >learn how to stick tongue out >make 120 thousand a week on Patreon only >will probably be a millionaire in two months Why the f--- is this s--- allowed? I've never been so close to suicide before. This society does not deserve jack. I thought I was a p------------, but now I realize I'm too good for this. I'm out.

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Anon talks about the salad guy. | /r/Greentext

>so legendary that his face is still recognizable over two millennia after his death >so influential that his name became a coveted title for emperors and kings Was he literally the greatest man in Western history?

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Anon pulls when manic | /r/Greentext

20230423_192155.jpg (161 KB, 1179x921) google yandex iqdb wait We are the grandsons of the retards you couldn't lobotomize Anonymous 08/26/23(Sat)14:56:33 No.74515088 [5] [Reply] ✓ >be manic >girls love it >get gf >fall out of mania >get dumped >wait for mania again >repeat Should I just go for hookups in the future? I'm not that good looking but during my manic periods I'd be super low inhib.

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Anon gone full Kraut | /r/Greentext

1/9 IIMj7sbh (OP) US 3h (8/26 9:01) 18520034 · 16 Re - 4 Img JPG 126KB (1525 × 804) Capture.jpg 3 Replies Lederhosen Men Short Dark Brown $119.97 Women Accessories Outfit Builder News About Us 12 products S---. Lederhosen Men Kneebound Light Brown $0 $99.97 Q & W Best selling Lederhosen Men Kneebound Dark Brown $109.97 >be me >talk about "muh 51% german" >buy and drink oktoberfest beer >eat chocolate from germany >brain feels good and think it might be an ancestral thing >i already know wifi can read my mind and give me ads accordingly, but that's another story, but also relevant to: >get an ad for this What the f---... Are they f------ with me? Do Germans even wear these anymore? Bros... Have I gone Full K----? : >but then suddenly notice: >damn those look comfy >look down and realize i am wearing jeans with suspenders over my shirt

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Anon wants to solve the garbage island problem.. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: PGPxzaw9 92 KB JPG 02/23/20(Sun)11:33:43 No.244983688 What is wrong with humans? There's literally a garbage island just floating out in the ocean. : Anonymous (ID: PGPxzaw9) 02/23/20(Sun)11:34:11 No.244983747 Oops, wrong pic. 142 KB PNG >>244984193 # >>244984204 # >>244984293 # >>244984460 # >>244984492 # >>244984786 # >>244985383 # >>244985568 # >>244985608 # >>244985694 # >>244985916 # >>244987244 # >>244987260 # >>244987344 # >>244987375 # >>244988612 # >>244988798 # >>244988826 # >>244989060 # >>244990340 # >>244990700 # >>244991319 # >>244991566 # >>244991687 # >>244992120 # >>244992855 # >>244993095 # >>244993386 #

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A random greentext I stumbled across | /r/Greentext

08/25/23(Fri)08:53:14 No.443731075 : Anonymous >>443730556 # >Family Guy intro ends >scene opens in Peter's house, where the family is on the couch watching TV >DING DONG >Lois: I wonder who that could be at this time of day. >Peter opens the door >Sonic: Hey, Peter! >Peter: Holy fr*cken crap, Lois! Check who it is! >Lois: Is that... Oh my god, Sonic Movie! >Brian: H--------, Sonic? I thought you enlisted in the military and got shipped off to Iraq! >scene where Sonic is fighting Islamic terrorists while the Drowning theme plays Sonic: Hehehe, yep, but I'm back. Those Arabs sure were too slow! >everyone but Meg laughs >Chris: It's great to have you back, Sonic! >Meg: Whatever! It was great to finally have some peace and quiet from those stupid puns... >Sonic turns into his true form and claws Meg's face off >Peter: NYEHEHEHEHEHE! >Stewie: Personally I prefer Dark Fleetway, but Fox can't negotiate for s---! >>443731303 # >>443732179 # >>443736126 # >>443769389 #

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Anon is a Lancaster shipper | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ass www.www wwww *033 04/03/23 (Mon)16:13:41 No.136406683 1680372393800453.jpg 1.03 MB JPG >You were supposed to be replacement Pyrrha, but nooooo, you just had to fill your fat-ass with Cookies and not follow the proper diet I gave you to fit on her clothes >You didn't even grow your hair like I told you to >>136406704 # >>136406726 #

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Anon really like humming birds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous BORN TO FEEL 10/15/18(Mon)20:53:40 No.782415997 >be me >7 y/o >mommy placed a humming bird feeding thing in the backyard >we get visited by many humming bird during summer 60 KB JPG >one humming bird we see often >he starts getting friendly with me and flutters around me after eating >one day wait for bird to come back >he eventually comes around to eat >when he lands some c--- praying mantis grabs him and tries to eat bird bro TARDRAGE.mp4 >f------ runs over to the c--- mantis and crushes his head with my fist >bird bro is fine and while the c--- is dead Thats right bitch you don't touch bird bro. F----- mantis I kill them each time I see one.

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Anon has a dilema | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 85 KB JPG 1 Reply 08/25/23(Fri)22:00:56 No.905001759 >want to get married and have kids by 25 >ugly as f--- what now? View Thread

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Are the writers stupid? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous AMAZON BRIGINAL INVINCIBLE PHINCHLEFRA 2.71 MB PNG : Anonymous Anon, I... 08/25/23(Fri)16:23:45 No.189153076 >Character is called Invincible >You can clearly see him 08/25/23(Fri)16:24:20 No.189153091

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Greentext Stories - Anon is a hkls virgin. | /r/Greentext

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Anonymous >be me >15 at the time >hkless virgin >have 0 idea how to stay sane or alive >discover 4chan >acquire i----- fetish >would bang irl but parentalfags are old >relatives are dumb too Relatives >and I'm an only child >guessilljustfixthat.jfif >begini siblings 11/25/18(Sun)03:30:34 No.785761646 inducing divorce so I can bring in some step- >5 months in, it ain't working >somehow my parents have become even closer w-- >time to bring out the big guns >1 I f------ plant s--- in the bedroom for my mom to find >when I feel like it I'll say some stuff about mom talking to guys to my dad >gameon.mp4 >only 2 weeks and they are about to blow, I can feel it >it's time to deal the final blow >B) M >look for the loose stone in their relationship >mom's phone is clean as heck w-- >rummage through my dad's phone and find "gasp" pic. s?ofthots? >I'd save that s--- and upload it to 4chan any other day, but this is my time to shine Schw >show my mom >thatsit.exe >mom finally gets a divorce, she takes me, dad doesn't even try to argue (w--?) >dad gets the house >4 months into my new (s-----) life and I knew I made a mistake shut then >but then >just as I was about to go visit my dad Peng >my mom came in with >with a guy Sie this it? >is this it? is this the one? >eavesdrop to find out if he has kids my age >mostly talking about their previous dates >I wonder how they even hid their relationship from me for so long? >suddenly the topic changes >oshitkfc.gif >he has a 15 year old daughter lololol >this one's a keeper, boys >visit dad anyways because I want to laugh in the face of destin destiny >going there through a mountain trail cause why not >best f------ wagon ride of my life, dude just t as we round a corner, something hits the back of my head and knocks me out cold >when I wake up, there are three other guys in the wagon with me >mfw I'm tied up >mfw destiny is laughing at me >mfw Todd Howard is back at it again

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